Love after Marriage

by Chandra, Bhagya

  “I’m happy being here, and this is the first time I will celebrate Diwali with you. What more do I want?” Then instantly he made the decision. “Let’s not go. Let’s just stay here, Roshni,” he said and looked for her approval.

  Roshni had already noticed that Deepak did not miss any opportunity to be with her, and secretly, she also liked his company. She nodded and gave her approval.

  Deepak called back Sashank to inform him that they could not go to Mumbai because Roshni’s condition did not permit it at this time. Meanwhile, Roshni was all excited because of Diwali; she was sad, too, for she missed her babuji, but Deepak’s presence made a difference. She looked forward to celebrating Diwali with him. She planned on what sweets to make, what clothes to buy, and how to decorate the house. Deepak noticed this excitement in her and supported her in all ways possible.

  ~ ~ ~

  Roshni’s project was almost complete, and she submitted her part of the work at the Thursday group meeting. Everybody was happy she completed it on time, and she thanked Deepak for all his help and support. Bhaskar, the project manager, told her that the remaining work was on schedule, and the launch was scheduled for December 6th. He communicated that she would not be bothered for the next few weeks, and she should enjoy the time with Deepak.

  Bhaskar adjourned the team meeting, and Roshni was satisfied. After they hung up the phone, Roshni slowly got up and looked towards Deepak. “Deepak, thank you for all the help and support with the project. I enjoyed learning lot of things.” She headed towards the kitchen.

  That morning’s doctor’s appointment had gone well. There was good improvement in her condition, and she just had a sling now on her left arm and a cast on her foot for support. Her foot was still healing, but she was able to walk more without crutches.

  Suddenly she felt a jerk, and she bumped into Deepak’s chest. Deepak was very quick and pulled her to him, holding her by the waist. Their eyes locked, a very passionate look indeed!

  Deepak stared into her eyes. “Only thank you, Roshni?”

  Roshni wondered what else he expected. “What more do you want?”

  Deepak pulled her closer to him and stared at her very passionately. He thought, You don’t get it, do you? I need a kiss and a hug, Roshni, but his thoughts were interrupted.

  “Deepak, hmm…shall I make some kheer since you like it?”

  Deepak couldn’t take his eyes off her. A fire blazed to life within; she felt his breath closer to her face, and he felt her breath on his chest.

  “Kheer!” He smirked.

  And before Roshni could say anything, he stooped and pecked her cheek. She lost her balance and held onto his shirt tight, crumpling it. After a few moments she gained her control and freed herself from him.

  “Wonderful idea, Roshni, can you make some kheer?”

  Roshni, still recovering from this most recent experience, moved to the stove. Deepak went back to his chair near the dining table.

  “Deepak, next week is Diwali. Do you have any new clothes to wear?”

  “New clothes! What for?”

  “It’s a tradition to wear something new for Diwali, especially for Lakshmi pooja. Babuji always bought me new dresses for Dashera and Diwali. We wore new clothes on these festival days.”

  Deepak didn’t have anything brand new to wear. “So let’s go shopping this evening. Let’s get some new clothes for you and me,” he said.

  Because of her handicap, she was confined to the apartment, and Deepak looked for opportunities to take her out.

  Chai was ready, and Roshni was trying to pour it into cups when Deepak helped her as she was not able to use her left arm effectively. He asked her to sit at the table while he brought the chai. Roshni slowly made her way to the table. Deepak sat next to her.

  “What time do you want to leave, Roshni?”

  “I’m not sure.”

  “It’s already 4 p.m.”

  Roshni closed her eyes for a minute. “Deepak, let’s go tomorrow morning.”

  “Why, I mean…why not today?” Deepak asked, being curious.

  “Because it’s already late afternoon, and all the roads and streets will be very busy. We’ll be stuck in traffic at several places. Tomorrow morning about ten-ish is good so we can spend time in leisure, and…maybe, if you’re interested, we could have lunch and come home.”

  Deepak liked the idea – spending time leisurely and having lunch together. What a big change in Roshni’s approach. He readily agreed to it.

  ~ ~ ~

  Roshni was up early and was already in the kitchen getting ready to make some sweets. It was Saturday morning, and Diwali was on Tuesday. Listening to the sound of dishes in the kitchen, Deepak woke up and wondered what Roshni was up to. He came to the dining area.

  “Shall I make chai for you?” she asked him, being in a good mood.

  Deepak nodded in acknowledgement. “Roshni, what are you doing? You seem to be busy.”

  “Tuesday is Diwali, and I’m getting ready to make some sweets.” She smiled.

  “Oooooooo, sweets, I just love them,” he replied, being very excited. He came closer to Roshni. “What sweets are you making?”

  “What sweets do you like? I will try to make what you like.”

  “I just love all the sweets – gulab jamun, besan laddu, ras malai, burfi – you name it,” he said.

  “Oh good, I planned on making besan laddu and burfi. Now that you mentioned gulab jamun, I will plan on making them too! Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll have any energy to make ras malai. We can buy some from the store.”

  Deepak came closer to her, holding her by the waist and looking passionately into her eyes. “Can you really make all of these sweets?”

  His warm breath made her shiver. She blushed and felt shy. She could not hide her emotions and gently lowered her eyes and agreed that she could make those sweets.

  Deepak stared at her, full of passion. If only she cooperated, he would hug her. Roshni felt uncomfortable with him so close, and she moved away from him, but he leaned towards her. “Roshni, can I help you?” he whispered, being romantic with her.

  There was passion and longing for each other, yet the little distance that Roshni had created still remained. Roshni came to her senses and moved away from him.

  “I’m fine. I just want to complete them early in case I get tired and lose all my energy.”

  “Don’t worry, Roshni. I’ll help you. Tell me what can I do?”

  “Actually since you mentioned ras malai, you can get ready quickly and get some ras malai from the store while I make other sweets. It will be less crowded now,” she suggested to him.

  Deepak agreed and headed out to a mithai shop. He was so captivated – the crowd bought so many sweets in preparation for Diwali, and there was a wide variety of sweets in the store. He always loved to eat sweets, and coming here was a treat for him. Getting excited, he decided to buy a whole bunch of varieties so Roshni did not have to spend time working hard in the kitchen. He came home with a huge bag.

  Roshni was stupefied to see the bag. “What did you bring? You went to buy just ras malai, right?”

  “Roshni, oh, that mithai shop was so full of fresh sweets, I could not resist and bought few more than what we had talked about.”

  He started taking the boxes out, one after another, and explained what was in each of them. Roshni had her mouth wide open. “You bought gulab jamun as well?”

  “Yes, I did. They were so fresh, and more importantly, I did not want you to go through the trouble of making them.”

  Roshni was disappointed because she wanted to make some, but now with all these sweets – what was she going to do? “Okay, since you bought all these, I guess I don’t have to make any. Deepak, you may want to keep all these in the refrigerator.” She slowly walked away to the kitchen.

  Deepak noticed she was not pleased with the sweets he’d bought. She was disappointed, and he did not understand. He walked behind her and held her hand and turned her
to face him. “Roshni, what happened? Are you upset because I bought these?”

  Roshni stared into his eyes. “No.”

  He wrapped his hands around her waist, holding her. “You seem to be upset, why? Did I embarrass you by getting all these?”

  “You did not upset me. It’s just that–” She stopped without completing her sentence.

  Deepak was still holding her. “Just what?”

  “I can understand you getting excited and buying all the sweets, but we have to follow the tradition too.” She looked at him very caringly and tried to explain. “I have to make some sweet dish to offer at the time of Lakshmi pooja, and now with all these…what can I make…and with just the two of us, how many can we eat? Even if I distribute a few to the neighbors – you bought so much, Deepak.”

  Deepak now understood her point. He quickly glanced towards the kitchen and noticed Roshni had roasted something, for he could smell the wonderful aroma. Sniffing, he asked, “Looks like you have already started something? What is it?”

  “I just roasted the besan for laddus.”

  Deepak still held her hand. “So make the laddus. I didn’t buy any laddus. Can we offer laddus to Devi?”

  Roshni nodded.

  Deepak continued, smiling, “Roshni, sweets are my weakness. I can eat them on and on, and–”

  “You can keep these for only so long, Deepak,” she interrupted.

  “You know what – after you give some to the neighbors for Diwali, whatever remains we will eat. If not, maybe we can freeze them and eat them later.”

  “Freeze them…why?”

  “So we can eat them for a longer time, and hopefully they will taste the same after thawing.”

  “Why freeze and eat when we can get them fresh?”

  “Oh yeah, I forgot…you can get everything fresh here, unlike the USA, where I freeze the sweets and eat them when I’m in the mood,” he said.

  All this time he had continued to hold her. She did not make any attempt to free herself; she was absolutely fine being held by him. After a few minutes, she freed herself and moved away. Looking into his eyes, she continued, “Deepak, can I ask you for some help, please?”

  Deepak nodded.

  “My left arm is not strong yet. Would you help me make the laddus?” she requested.

  “Certainly, you’ll have to show me how, though,” he said and was all ready to help her.

  They went into the kitchen, and Roshni demonstrated making laddu to Deepak. He was excited to help. They made the besan laddus, and all the other sweets got transferred to the refrigerator.

  ~ ~ ~

  Later that afternoon, Roshni called Lakshmi to help her with cleaning the house. Lakshmi agreed to come on Sunday, the next day. Roshni had everything planned for Diwali.

  At the dining table, Deepak asked Roshni when they could go to finish the shopping for Diwali. She had forgotten that most of the stores were closed on Sunday, so they postponed their shopping trip until Monday.

  Roshni was busy Sunday cleaning with Lakshmi. She took great pleasure in getting the house ready for Diwali. She cleaned the altar and the various Gods’ pictures and rearranged them properly. She asked Lakshmi to buy her some jasmine garlands on Monday so she could decorate the pictures with flower garlands. Deepak watched the excitement in her eyes, and he was very proud of her. The physical handicap did not stop her enthusiasm.

  On Monday, Deepak and Roshni went shopping in the morning. They had a good time together in the stores, looking around for clothes for both of them. Roshni’s walking had improved significantly, but still there were times when she needed help with her balance, and Deepak was always around to help her.

  They entered a huge showroom – a one-stop shopping center for the entire family. Roshni and Deepak first went to the men’s side and picked up a couple of kurta pyjama sets for Deepak, and of course, Roshni had to approve until the final selection was made. Then Roshni, with Deepak’s help, came to the women’s section. Even before Roshni asked, Deepak requested that the salesperson show them beautiful salwar suits.

  Roshni was taken by surprise and looked at Deepak.

  “Roshni, this time I am going to buy dresses for you, and you will not object.”

  This was more of a command from him, and Roshni certainly did not want to create a scene. They discussed the dresses. Roshni was indecisive; she went back and forth and finally picked a dress but was not sure if Deepak approved of it. This was the first time she felt she wanted his approval of her dress – a big shift in her thinking!

  He noticed that she waited for his approval and felt very elated. She was ready to ask for a bill when he said, “Roshni, you just picked one dress, pick a few more.”

  Roshni was startled. “A few more! Why? I just need one to wear tomorrow. I’m fine.”

  “No, you are not fine.” He insisted she buy more. He stared at her very lovingly. “Would you mind if I picked something for you?”

  Roshni nodded her head in approval, and he picked a couple more dresses for her. He was familiar with her color and design choices, and she readily approved them! She was surprised – he understood her choices. Again, progress in their relationship!

  A few minutes later he ordered the salesman to bring some of the latest designer saris. Roshni was speechless. Who is he buying saris for? She took a negative turn, but she forced herself to think otherwise. She looked at him, hoping he would help her understand who he was buying the saris for, but he was in a mischievous mood, and he completely ignored her curiosity.

  Very soon the salesman brought a whole bunch of beautiful designer saris. Deepak selected a sari and asked her for her opinion. She shook her head in disapproval. Although she liked some of them, she disapproved each of them. This continued for some time, and Deepak was frustrated.

  “Roshni, how come you do not like any of these saris?”

  “Whom are you buying these for? Unless I know, I cannot approve.”

  Finally Deepak gave in. “Who else would I buy for? You, obviously.”

  “I don’t need any. Why are you buying them for me? Please–”

  Deepak interrupted her. “I am getting these for you, and that is final. I know your preferences so whether you approve or not, I will get them, and you have to wear them. No argument on this,” he commanded.

  He was pretty stern when he mentioned this, and Roshni, although lost for words to respond, liked this. She knew he was serious about it, and with a little discussion, Deepak finally settled on getting her two saris.

  The bill was ready, and this time Roshni did not argue with him about payment. They left with Deepak holding all the packages and supporting Roshni.

  As they came out, Deepak spotted a jewelry store. “Roshni, you wait here. Let me leave these bags in the car and come back.”

  “Why? I’ll go with you. Aren’t we going home?”

  “Not yet, let’s go to the jewelry store.”

  “What for? Please don’t even think of buying any jewelry for me. Let’s go home.”

  Deepak left her even before she finished her sentence. She tried to follow him, but he was back within a few seconds and held her hand and took her to the jewelry store.

  Deepak looked very lovingly towards her. “Roshni, please, I really wanted to get some jewelry for you, so let’s try to find a few things.”

  “A few things…what do you mean a few things? This is a jewelry store, Deepak, and I hope you know that.”

  Deepak nodded his head and began to move inside, holding her hand. Finally with a little argument here and there, Deepak bought two gold sets for Roshni; each of them consisted of a necklace, matching bangles and ear tops. He definitely was in a mood to buy things for her.

  Roshni was very upset with him.

  On the way back in the car, he asked, “Roshni, why are you so upset?”

  Roshni did not respond but gave him angry looks.

  Deepak now placed his hand on her shoulder. “Roshni, what happened? Why are you so upse
t?”

  Roshni looked angrily at him. “You know my weakness very well; that is why you create scenes outside so I don’t open my mouth.”

  Deepak smiled and agreed with her. “Of course, otherwise you would not let me buy anything for you.”

  Roshni snapped back at him, “Why do you have to buy me anything, anyway? I have so many clothes – dresses, saris – and jewelry, all that jewelry. I never wear any of these. Why do you waste all this money, Deepak, especially on me?”

  “What do you mean why you? You are my wife, and I have not bought anything for you since our marriage, and…and I know in the beginning it was rough, but now…but now…things are different.”

  Roshni did not say a word; both of them remained silent the rest of the journey. They arrived home, and it was already past 1 p.m. Deepak first helped Roshni come inside the house and then went back to fetch the bags. Roshni relaxed on the sofa, massaging her foot. The little extra walking she did tired her and the leg. Deepak walked in with the bags and noticed Roshni on the sofa. He left the bags in the room and sat by her side, massaging her foot.

  “Roshni, do you have a lot of pain?”

  Roshni tried to push his hand away, but he was stubborn too. She gently rested her head on the arm of the sofa while he continued to massage.

  After a few minutes, he brought water for her and helped her drink it. With tears in her eyes, she said, “I’m still not okay, Deepak. I’m unable to handle even a little physical stress; that’s why I avoid going out, and you…you…I’m sorry.”

  Deepak brought her closer to him. Her head rested on his chest, and he gently massaged her back. “Roshni, you went through a major accident, and it will take time to recover. You have to be patient.”

  She tried to get up and fix something for lunch. Deepak pulled her hand and forced her to sit and relax while he went to make lunch. Without a fuss, he decided on making rice pulav and got the ingredients ready. He placed a pan on the stove and roasted ginger garlic paste in heated oil with some seasoning ingredients. The aroma spread in the air, and Roshni could smell it in the family room.