Out of Ruins

by Michele G Miller

  Jules draws an unsteady breath and pulls West to her face. Their lips are so close, every feathery breath of air he takes touches her skin. “Never doubt how perfect you are. Yes, you make me happy.” She kisses him quickly and says into his warm mouth, “Extremely happy.”

  His lips part beneath hers, making Jules gasp when his tongue darts out, brushes her bottom lip and sucks it into his mouth. He sweeps the hair away from her face and tips her neck back to kiss it softly. A soft moan escapes her when his tongue traces a warm path along her jaw and back to her lips. He whispers hot words as their lips tangle; shooting rods of fire through her entire body. “I’m not perfect by any means, baby, but I’m perfect for you,” he murmurs.

  All thoughts of West not responding to her proclamation of love are lost as his hands and mouth devour her. Careful not to go too far with her, West’s fingers tease the skin along the small of her back. His thumbs tickle her ribs and move up to skim the sensitive skin below her bra, but nothing further.

  When she sits in his lap and tugs restlessly at the hem of his shirt as they continue to kiss, West groans and pulls her against his shoulder to hug her.

  “We need to stop,” he begs breathlessly.

  It’s on the tip of her tongue to say she doesn’t want to, but her overheated senses register where they are and her cheeks flush pink. “Let’s stay in tonight,” she suggests, well aware of the innuendo.

  She feels the shake of his head above her own as he speaks. “I really think we should go out.”

  “And I think…” Her fingers slip under his shirt and she runs her hand over his back muscles. They leap at her light touch and she smiles a devilish smile. “We should stay in, alone. At your place.”

  “Babe…”

  “Babe.” Jules tips her head back and looks longingly into his face. His hair is messy from her fingers and his cheeks are ruddy from the heat they worked up between them. “C’mon, we’ll watch a movie. I’ll stay the night.” She lifts her brows suggestively.

  West scrunches his face up as he considers her request. He shakes his head slowly and opens and closes his eyes; clearly stating without words he thinks this is a bad idea. His grin hints at his answer though. “Damn it, I really can’t say no to you,” he huffs and licks her lips and her cheeks lift into a full smile.

  “So you’ve told me before.”

  Sixteen

  Jules pauses as she recalls that afternoon, and then just as vividly, that night.

  “That mid-October day I went from feeling the lowest low filled with guilt, sadness and remorse, to being on top of the world. West didn’t have to tell me he loved me that afternoon at South Berry Farm. I knew he did. It was in every touch, every look he gave me.”

  * * *

  “I’m trying to watch this movie.”

  “Mmmm, me too.”

  “Liar.” Jules shoos West away from her neck with a shake of her head. “You know that tickles me,” she complains, even as her hand works into the back of his hair to hold his lips in place.

  They’re lounging on the chaise in the dark media room, having already enjoyed take-out, and are watching — or trying to watch — a movie.

  “I vant to suck your blood,” he mimics Dracula; using his teeth to tease the sensitive skin below her ear.

  Goosebumps cover her skin and she shivers with a giggle. “Stop.”

  “I gave you the chills.” He grins, obviously proud of himself.

  Pulling away from her neck, West runs his hands over her arms to warm her.

  She nudges his arm with her shoulder. “You’re missing the best part!”

  “What part is that? Is this where the house blows up?”

  “Um, no.”

  “The aliens invade?”

  “West.”

  “Oh, this is a car chase, right?”

  “West!”

  “What, baby?” he asks innocently; taking in her profile instead of the television.

  “You said you’d watch this movie with me.”

  “I am.”

  “No you’re not. If you want to watch something else, we can.” She sighs and slides forward to get up.

  His hands shoot out, grab her hips and pull her back to her spot. “No, no…I love this part,” he warns; shushing her.

  The girl on the screen runs up the beach with a perfect sunset behind her and waves roll across her bare feet as she makes her way toward the male lead.

  “I figured it out,” her breathy voice calls after the guy and he turns; his face appropriately shocked to see her there. “It was you. It was always you.” She begins to shake and then cry, and the camera pans to the male lead who steps forward to hold her.

  “You saved me,” she says, and they kiss.

  Jules sniffles and tips her head down as a wave of emotions overwhelms her. With a small smile on his lips, West brushes the curtain of hair covering her face out of his way and stares at her with raised brows.

  “Sorry,” she apologizes, shrugging.

  “You promised no crying if we watched a chick flick. You know I can’t stand to see you cry.” His finger rubs beneath her eye lightly.

  “I forgot that’s what she said,” Jules babbles and sniffs back tears. “It reminds me of us.”

  West presses a kiss to her temple and pulls her face to his.

  “You saved me,” she whispers; twisting on the chair and angling her body toward him.

  “Come here.” Tenderly, he moves her onto his lap so she straddles him.

  “Do you remember when you told me you thought God put me there that night to save your life?”

  “Yeah.”

  "You were wrong.” Jules stiffens, ready to fight him on this, but West touches her lips with his thumb and stops her from speaking. She shakes her head and kisses his thumb softly as he swipes it across her lower lip.

  “I’m not wrong, baby,” he warns; his voice barely audible over the movie in the background. “God put me there so YOU could save ME. You’ve given my life back.” The tears return to Jules' eyes as West gazes into them. Her heart races as warmth shoots through her limbs. “I haven’t cared about anything for a long time, Jules, but…” He presses his thumb down on her lip and she boldly touches it with the tip of her tongue. Emboldened by his words, her hands creep under his shirt. She skims the hard muscles up his sides, presses her body closer to him and tilts her hips into his as he sighs a ragged breath.

  “I love you…I love you. So. Damn. Much,” he says breathily; his hands curling around her neck and bringing her mouth to his hungrily. His tongue sweeps into her mouth; possessing it so completely she feels like a live wire. Every inch of her body crackles with electricity as waves of need rush through her, and her heart fills to capacity with his declaration of love.

  Prying her lips from his breathlessly, she rests her forehead against his. “I love you too.”

  “How did I get this lucky?” He groans.

  She bites his lip lightly and grins at his small moan. Grasping the bottom of his shirt, Jules deftly pulls it up and off in one sweeping motion. “You’re about to get really lucky. Literally.” She says with a smile.

  He leans back and she sweeps her hands over his chest and abs. She takes in his perfect form; the hard muscles leaping as her fingers graze them.

  She fights to keep her eyes on his as her hands go to her shirt and she begins to unbutton it.

  “Let me,” he breathes; his fingers closing over hers. She drops her hands while he slowly unfastens each small button. His eyes remain on hers the entire time and she blushes as the cool air hits her exposed bare skin. When he undoes the final button, his fingers creep back up; peeling the shirt back from her shoulders and pushing it down her arms as he sits forward. His eyes are still locked on hers and she sees the desire burning there as the shirt slips from her arms. West brings his hands to her back to massage her bare skin, and for one nervous moment she panics, thinking he intends to unclasp her bra, but instead he presses his palms on either side of her
spine and leans in to kiss her softly. Her chest comes into contact with his and she sighs into his mouth at the contact, knowing all that separates them is the lacy bra she wears.

  He kisses across her cheek and down her jaw to her neck, and Jules holds her breath as he leans her back and kisses down to her collarbone. Her head falls back to give him access as his lips trail across her collar from left to right and then back up her neck. Neither his lips nor his eyes have touched her nearly naked form, and she pushes back the disappointment when he captures her lips in another searing kiss. She’s a quivering mess; simultaneously nervous waiting for him to look at her body, and then shamelessly disappointed when he doesn’t.

  “Are you sure?” he asks, his voice nearly unrecognizable.

  “What?” she mumbles in confusion.

  Adjusting his hold on her back, he cups her face and tips her chin towards him. “I’m not pushing this. Are you sure you’re ready? Because I’m not looking if you’re not sure.”

  Where did this boy come from? her head screams as her heart melts and she turns her face into his palm, kisses it and looks into his fiery eyes. “I’m positive.”

  She nearly yelps when his hands drop to her thighs and he sidles to the edge of the chair. He stands and Jules wraps her legs around his waist as he carries her out of the room and down the hall. Their eyes stay glued to one another’s as he enters his bedroom. Turning, he kneels on his bed and sets her down gently. She falls onto her back and leans up on her elbows; taking a shaky breath and pulling in her stomach out of habit and self-consciousness.

  West’s eyes finally take her near nakedness in; his eyes roving hungrily over her chest, across her lacy nude bra, and down her abs to the low riding waist of her jeans. His index finger comes up, tracing the edges of her bra, and she shivers.

  “You’re perfect.” His voice is hoarse as he places his palm on the mattress next to her head. He hovers over her body while his other hand moves slowly up her arm and pulls the bra strap down her shoulder. He moves with slow precision. It’s agonizing. His lips descend on her and press small kisses along her shoulder, her clavicle and finally to the very tops of her chest swelling above the bra. She lowers her body to the bed so her hands can touch him, wraps her arms around his back and pulls him down on top of her; gasping with pleasure when his weight presses her into the mattress.

  “You’re perfect,” she mimics, and kisses his shoulder before raising her lips to his. They kiss, and kiss, and then kiss some more. Their mouths are hot with need; both of them taking and giving. It drives her mad and his kisses take away all coherent thought as his free hand roams her ribcage, sliding down her hip and thigh. He pulls at her and when she lifts her thigh up to wrap around his body, she feels the proof of his desire press into her jeans.

  His hand slides back up her skin and he gently cups her; his thumb rubbing over the swell pressing against the bra. Their breathing becomes rapid as they build a burning flame of desire between them. Instinctively her hips rise and press into his, matching the plunge of his tongue into her mouth and mimicking the physical act they are both more than ready for.

  West takes charge when she moans.

  “You’re driving me wild,” he growls into her mouth. He flips over and pulls her into a sitting position on top of his hips. Sitting up, he kisses her chest again as his fingers unclasp her bra and pull it away from her hot skin. Jules presses her bare chest against his, both to feel his hot skin and to shelter herself. West’s room is dim but not completely dark, and her face burns as his hands slide up her ribcage; his skillful hands teasing her to the point of breaking. When he pulls her away and presses kisses to her skin, she lets out another little whimper. His tongue teases her to a new level of delirious joy. She feels every hard inch of West’s desire pressing into her and she’s ready, more than ready, to complete the act. He rolls their bodies over again and sits between her thighs. Sitting up, he moves his hand to the top button of her jeans.

  Frantic now, West peels her skinny jeans down her legs and touches his lips to her calf. He pulls the covers down from his bed and she crawls under the sheet as he stands, pulls off his own jeans and grabs his wallet from the pocket. He pulls a foil packet out and slides back into bed next to her, lying on his side facing her.

  “I’m asking you one more time if you’re sure, baby,” he asks; his voice thick, shaking as if he’s afraid she might say no. Instead of answering with words, she twists towards him and outlines his mouth with the tip of her tongue as her hand reaches for him.

  That’s all it takes. With another long, hard kiss they discard the last of their clothing. When her nails dig into his backside and her breathing becomes unsteady, he rolls the condom on and settles himself between her legs.

  “Babe?” West whispers; his lips touching her eyelids as he gives each a sweet, soft kiss. “Open your eyes and look at me, Jules.”

  Her lids flutter open and she finds West’s golden brown eyes inches from her face. His fingers push her tangled hair away from her face as his hand cups her jaw; his thumb pulling her lip from her teeth.

  “Look at me…I love you, thank you for loving me,” he gasps; breathless as he restrains himself from moving too fast. “I love you, baby. I love you,” he mutters again and she feels a tear run down her cheek.

  He stills and kisses her hard as she whispers into his mouth, “I love you too, always.”

  “Always,” he agrees and they begin to move in sync with each other.

  “I feel guilty,” West confesses as he holds her close to his body. After they cleaned up, he gave her a tee shirt to throw on over her lacy panties. Even after what they just did, she felt too shy to lie naked in his arms.

  “Don’t feel guilty,” she mumbles sleepily; her head resting in the crook of his shoulder and chest and her arm lying across his abs. “It was perfect. I wanted to do it.”

  He chuckles and presses a kiss to the top of her head. “Not about the sex, love. That was amazing and perfect.” She grins and props her chin on his chest so she can look at him.

  “Then what do you feel guilty about?”

  “I used to wish the tornado never happened, but now I can’t be sorry that it did. I wouldn’t have you if we hadn’t gone through that,” he confesses with eyes full of shame. “I’m sorry; I know it’s selfish.”

  She shakes her head and blinks rapidly to keep her tears at bay. “No, no, I get it. I’ve thought the same thing. After the twister, my dad said something to me that never really made sense until now. He said, ‘You can always build something beautiful out of ruins.’ This — you and I — we are that something beautiful.”

  He pulls himself up, hovers over her and shocks her with a passionate kiss. “I don’t deserve you, my sweet and sexy cheerleader.”

  “You think I’m sexy?” she asks sweetly; her leg wrapping around his back.

  “Baby, let me show you just how sexy I think you are.”

  She cringes as she thinks about the tenderness between her legs, and is worried that he’s implying they will have sex again.

  “Not until you’re ready,” he assures her, and pushes the hair away from her face. “I just want to kiss you.”

  Seventeen

  “It’s funny how the words he spoke that night would come back to haunt me occasionally. Having him in my life…us having found such a perfect happiness in each other…it was a double-edged sword. Our happiness came at the expense of so many others. Yes, we found our beautiful, but our town? The families of the forty-five who died? They were still grappling with the ruins of their own lives.

  “I allowed myself to forget about them for the next two weeks and just basked in the glow of what West and I had. Love and sex is a powerful drug. It camouflaged the pain until I couldn’t see it anymore. But it was still there, lying in wait for that perfect moment to crush me. Of all days, it found me again on my eighteenth birthday.”

  * * *

  “Hey gorgeous, we’re going to be late,” West calls to Jules. S
he puts the finishing touches on her makeup and hair for their ‘special date’ while West waits, sitting at her desk.

  “You can’t rush a girl who’s trying to be beautiful,” she replies with a laugh.

  West’s shadow startles her and Jules yelps when he appears at the bathroom door. “You don’t have to try, babe. You’re always beautiful.”

  He leans against the frame with his thumbs hanging from the pockets of his black slacks. He looks like James Bond with his crisp white shirt and perfectly fitted black pants. ‘Rutledge, West Rutledge’, her brain teases her and she giggles at her private joke. West creases his forehead and a wayward smile tugs at his lips.

  “Did you inhale too much hair spray?”

  “Ha, ha. You put me to shame looking that good! Now get out so I can finish.” She crosses to the door and presses a quick kiss to his lips to soften her order. West’s hands immediately move to her hips and she pushes him away. “Five minutes,” she promises.

  “Five,” he repeats with a warning and holds up five fingers.

  Returning to her make-up, Jules applies her eyeshadow and eyeliner carefully, deciding to go with a deep smoky, sexy look she’s never shown West before. She can’t stop smiling as she thinks about the dress and strappy heels she has hiding in her closet.

  “Hey, where’s your phone? I wanted to leave Carson’s number in case you need me.” West’s phone chose today, of all days, to commit suicide; taking a dive out of his Jeep on the way home from school.

  “It’s downstairs. There’s a notebook on my bedside table. Just leave it there.”

  “Got it,” he replies. “Three minutes, by the way.”