by Bonnie Vanak
Now Shelby looked so woebegone, so forlorn, he wanted to gather her into his arms and swear she’d never hurt again. Promise her anything. He hated seeing her like this, as if someone kicked her hard and she lacked the strength to get up.
“Do you ever find yourself regretting the past?” she asked. “Wonder what would happen if you had a do-over for the last ten years?”
“All the time.” He moved closer. “How the hell I ever left you is beyond me.”
She gave a tremulous smile. “And now you’re back.”
“And here with you.”
Nick reached out and stroked her wet, sugar-dusted lip and then he did what he swore he’d never again do.
He lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her. He kept the contact light, enjoying the subtle flavor of her mouth, the softness of her plumb lips, the startled sigh as she leaned into him.
Curling one hand around her head, he brought her closer and deepened the kiss. Nick thrust his tongue deep into the warm, moist cavern of her mouth, tasting tea, sugar and the unique damn-it-to-hell delight that was uniquely Shelby. Blood raced through his veins as his pulse kicked up, and his body thrummed like an electrical wire. He wanted this—no, needed this. Connection. Feeling. He’d been so damn numb for so long he thought he’d lost everything, hiding behind a sarcastic laugh and a sneer for the world.
Wonderful, fabulous, gritty Shelby had brought him roaring back to life. Beneath his jeans, he was hard. He kissed her, letting her know a man’s desire, not a boy’s, the kind of kiss you give a woman before you lay her down and love her long into the night.
His hands left her nape and explored lower, unfastening the top buttons of her blouse. Nick slid a hand under her blouse and cupped her breast. She fit perfectly into his palm. Gently he kneaded her hardened nipple, teasing lightly as he flicked his fingers over the cresting bud.
Moaning, Shelby grabbed his shoulders, holding on as if she was drowning. He was sinking as well, awash in pure pleasure. Nothing mattered but this moment, and Shelby. Need flooded him, such desperate need he’d die if he couldn’t have her.
Nick broke the kiss and stared down at her, at the sleepy confused passion glazing her eyes, at her mouth swollen from his possession. Then awareness dawned. Red flushed her cheeks and she pulled her blouse shut, as if realizing what they’d been doing.
You. Bed. Now. He struggled to think in complete sentences instead of grunting like a caveman. Impossible, when his body was surging with the need for sex, him so hard it hurt. No one would suffice but Shelby, her tangle of wild curls, her big eyes staring up at him as he moved deep inside her.
“What are you doing, Nick?” she whispered.
“What I wanted to do ten years ago, and stopped.” Nick cupped her chin and gazed into her eyes.
A hardness entered her gaze. “I’m no starry-eyed teenager anymore.”
“No, you’re a woman now. We will be lovers, Shelby.” He touched her cheek, marveling at her satin skin, flushed with anger and passion. “I want you in my bed, and what I want, I always get.”
Shelby shuddered as he leaned close and nuzzled her neck, dropping tiny kisses on it. “When did you become so single-minded, Nick?” she whispered.
“When I joined the teams.” He nipped her tender skin and then soothed the sting with a long lick. “We never give up. Never quit.”
He ran his hand down her back, stroking her to accustom her to his touch. It had been too many years since he’d touched her this way, but time rolled backward as if they were teenagers again, stealing away a few precious moments for themselves.
Then she jerked away, putting out her hands like a traffic cop.
“What you need is a hard dose of reality, Nick Anderson. I’m not the loving-and-leaving type. You should have learned that ten years ago.” Shelby pointed to the sofa. “I’m headed to bed. I have a long day tomorrow. Good night.”
Blinking, he stared after her as she stormed away. And then he chuckled ruefully.
Shelby thought he’d back down that easily? She didn’t know anything about SEALs.
Never give up. Never quit. Especially when it came to something he wanted.
Nick could be quite ruthless when it came to that.
Chapter 12
The next morning, Nick coaxed Shelby into joining him for a ride instead of painting in the barn. He needed the fresh air and exercise. He hadn’t forgotten the kiss of the previous night, and judging from the wariness in her eyes, neither had she.
But she was cordial enough, and soon they had saddled the horses and were riding.
They were riding on the main trail that afforded a splendid view of the mist-shrouded Smoky Mountains. The air was tinged with a hint of approaching winter, and it brought spots of rosy color to Shelby’s cheeks. She looked so damn pretty today, her long hair held back in a tortoiseshell clip, a favorite jean jacket keeping away the morning chill. And those long, delicious legs that haunted his fantasies.
Nick inhaled a lungful of fresh, clean air. After the last place he’d bunked, waking up to the stench of the garbage Dumpster just outside his window, this good country air cleared his head. Tempted him to stay a while longer. But if he couldn’t come up with enough money for the back payments Silas owed, he wouldn’t have a choice. The bank would foreclose.
The knowledge curdled his blood. He turned to look at Shelby, who looked so pretty in the misty light, her hair swinging gently in a ponytail.
That the Belle Creek still operated, the horses were healthy and the buildings well maintained, was due to her.
Nick leaned forward, the leather saddle creaking. “Do you know how amazing you are?”
Shelby turned her head. “Amazing at what?”
“Everything you do, Shel. Holding it together.”
She looked troubled. “I’m not doing such a great job lately. Some days it feels like it’s all falling apart. Being a mom is exhausting, especially when he’s sick. I worry about him, but I think today he should be all right. He’s only running a slight fever. I brought him over to stay with Felicity, he doesn’t seem that sick, but I want to make sure he’s not coming down with something.”
“He’s sick? You sure about that?” Nick remembered all the times he’d faked a temperature with the thermometer placed on a hot light bulb. “He seemed very alert this morning at breakfast. He really loves the new video game Dan and Felicity got for his birthday.”
Shelby stopped her horse. Pantser tossed her head and snorted, as if in agreement with Nick.
“You saw him at breakfast? He was sick in bed.”
“Not when I was up at five. Seemed mighty interested in his cereal.”
Shelby narrowed her eyes. “That kid...”
She turned the horse around, heading back. Grinning, Nick did the same. He hoped Shel wouldn’t be too hard on Timmy.
They rode at a canter on the trail, cutting through the pasture, when Nick spotted a thick black curl of smoke rising through the trees. His pulse raced.
“Fire,” he yelled at Shelby, kicking his mount into a gallop.
Nick leaned forward in the saddle, letting his horse have his head, holding tight with his knees while he dug out his cell phone from his jeans. He dialed 911 and barked out instructions.
That suspicious black line made his heart drop to his stomach. With the drought, if the fire spread, the entire ranch could burn. He raced over the trail, dirt flying up beneath his mount’s pounding hooves.
Now he could see the smoke rising from the barn. The barn that Timmy liked to hide in to play his video games.
Shelby galloped ahead of him and slid off her horse. Jake was running from the stables with Hank and Mario. They uncurled the hose at the pump.
Mario turned on the pump, but only a thin trickle of water came from the hose.
&n
bsp; “Son of a... What the hell,” Jake yelled. “Water pressure is too low!”
That pump had worked fine three days ago. Knowing the ranch was a tinderbox, Nick had checked it himself. More vandalism.
Shelby raced to the front of the barn, and picked up a small black baseball cap.
His blood ran cold.
“It’s Timmy’s,” she shouted. “Timmy!”
Jake dropped the hose. He shoved a hand through his hair and ran to the door, but drew back as billowing black smoke poured outside. “What the hell is that kid doing inside the barn?”
Nick leaped off the horse. Orange tongues of flames licked the sides of the barn now.
“Timmy!” Shelby screamed.
His heart dropped to his stomach as he heard a small voice cry out. “Aunt Shelby, help me!”
Nick caught her, forcing her back. “Stay here.”
Tearing off his T-shirt, he wet it with the thin stream of water from the hose. Nick held the shirt over his face and raced through the open door. Tremendous heat and black smoke slammed into him. Flames licked the left side of the wood barn, leaping up to the loft to ignite the hay stored there. Timmy loved sitting by the stalls by the hay to play his video games. Acrid smoke choked him as he crawled low, searching for Shelby’s nephew.
Nick spotted something by the green tractor near the hay bales. Lungs burning, he ran over, breathing through the wet T-shirt. Timmy was on the floor. Coughing violently, Timmy pointed to his foot, pinned between the wall and the tractor’s back wheel. “I’m stuck.”
With deliberate coolness, Nick talked in a low, soothing murmur to Timmy as he pushed back the tractor and untangled his foot. Throwing the wet shirt over Timmy’s head, he scooped the boy into his arms. Racing for the exit, he coughed, the thick black smoke blinding him. Tears gushed from his eyes. He could barely see. Focusing on the light streaming through the black smoke, he stumbled forward.
Gotta make it, gotta make it...
His bum leg suddenly gave out and he fell to his knees, nearly dropping Timmy. Behind him, the hay loft exploded into flames. Cinders flew into the air and he knew if they remained here a minute longer, they would both die.
Not on my watch.
Timmy sobbed and coughed. The terrified child in his arms fed him strength. He could do this. With every last ounce of effort, Nick struggled to his feet and forced himself to the exit.
As he emerged, Jake grabbed Timmy and ran away from the barn, yelling for Hank to help Nick. But it was Shelby who slid an arm around him, guiding him away from danger. Nick collapsed on the ground, desperate for fresh air. His leg ached like a bastard.
Mario and Hank crowded near him, congratulating him on his bravery as Shelby called for the arriving paramedics.
“You’re a real hero, Nick. You saved his life,” Hank told him.
An EMT slapped an oxygen mask on him.
“I’m checking on Timmy.” Shelby leaned forward and kissed his sooty cheek. “Thank you, Nick.”
Struggling to breathe, he gulped down fresh lungfuls of oxygen. Nick waved a hand to protest. The two EMTs ignored it, and made him stretch out. Grateful for the rest, he lay back, wincing as muscles in his bad leg jumped.
That injury nearly caused him to collapse and drop the little boy. Was it ever going to get better? Hell, he’d quit the teams because he feared letting down the other guys, and failing them in a crisis.
Now, because of his past injury, he’d almost let Shelby’s nephew die. As the paramedics shut the vehicle door, Nick didn’t feel like a hero.
* * *
Shelby couldn’t stop shaking inside.
The barn and everything inside were ruined. But Timmy was alive. Safe. So was Nick. Firefighters had the blaze under control, spraying a steady stream of water. Leaving Jake and the stable hands to deal with the fire’s aftermath, she had driven to the hospital.
The emergency department’s waiting room had only one other occupant, an elderly woman reading a magazine. Shelby sank into a battered chair. Shaking badly, she buried her head into her hands.
Thanks to Nick, Timmy would live. But Felicity and Dan weren’t anywhere on the ranch. Jake said he hadn’t seen Dan since early that morning.
Who would set the barn on fire? Was it another move to drive Nick into selling?
Suddenly she remembered her easel and paints. She’d left them there, planning to paint each morning. Instead, today she’d gone riding with Nick. If she’d been in the barn, would the arsonist have knocked her cold, leaving her to die?
Shelby felt as if someone had kicked her in the stomach. Drenched in sweat, soot coating her face, she felt as if her legs would give out. She called the only person whom she could trust in an emergency. Ann answered on the first ring.
“Honey, are you okay?” her best friend asked in her thick accent. “I heard about it through the grapevine. Oh, Shelby, is Timmy going to be all right?”
Shelby blew out a breath. “I’m here at the hospital, waiting to see him. The doctor said he’ll probably be here at least for a day to make sure he’s all right. Nick saved his life. He’s here, too—they admitted him for smoke inhalation. Ann, who would do such a thing? Try to kill a little boy?”
“It’s a horrible, horrible thing, Shelby. Maybe whoever set the fire didn’t know Timmy was in there. Maybe they’re getting desperate. Can’t Nick just sell and cut his losses and leave?”
“And I’ll be homeless.”
“You’ll always have a place with me, honey. You can find another job in town without that bitch Natalie jerking your chain. Your sister will be back in less than a year, anyway. Belle Creek is too dangerous, Shelby! Is Jonah any closer to catching whoever is doing this?”
Shelby gripped her cell phone tight. “I don’t know. I think after today he’s going to have to put more men on the case because now it’s attempted murder. It’s one thing to cut up horse tack or damage property, another to set fire to a building and nearly kill a child.”
There was silence for a minute on the other end. Then Ann said softly, “Honey, do you need me to come down there? Is there anything I can do? Want me to stay at the ranch with you until Nick gets out?”
“No. I’ll be okay. I’ll let you know if I need anything. Thanks, Ann.”
As her friend murmured goodbye, Shelby thumbed off the phone. What would she have done if Timmy died in the barn? She’d never have forgiven herself.
Her trembling hands scrubbed the legs of her jeans. Heather trusted her with her only son, trusted her to keep him safe. Safe wasn’t the ranch. Not now. The pranks and vandalism had escalated beyond mischief. What next? Would someone take a shot at Timmy as he walked to the main road to catch the school bus?
Thank the good Lord for Nick. Nick, whom she’d dismissed as a bad boy intent only on his own pleasure.
The man was a true warrior, a real hero. Seeing him dash into that burning barn, risking his own life, made her realize the qualities that shone through him that he downplayed with his grin and teasing manner.
Not all men had the mettle to put their own safety second, and the welfare of others first. She began to understand Nick preferred to hide behind a mask of a charismatic grin and indifference.
All the men she’d dated paled in comparison. They were nice, mild guys, even-tempered and even amicable, like Jonah. They had dated a few times but never really clicked. Nothing could compare to Nick and his raw sexuality, his personality.
Silas had been good to her, kind and generous. But sometimes it was easier to treat a stranger’s child better than your own. Perhaps. All Shelby knew was that Nick was here now, and he’d promised to stick around to see it through with the ranch. Nick, shouldering the burden, taking on responsibilities his father had placed on him. The others were only concerned with the ranch and what the finances meant to them
, like Shelby. Making sure they had a home and a business.
Not Nick. He could easily cut his losses, sell the place and walk away. Her heart warmed. Maybe he wasn’t as much of a careless nomad as she thought.
Maybe it was time someone told him exactly what he was, and how much he meant to the ranch. And to her.
* * *
Nick hated hospitals. He’d protested, wheedled and even struggled as the paramedics strapped him onto a gurney and loaded him into the ambulance. Now, lying in a hospital bed, hooked up to oxygen, he tried to relax. But his skin felt stretched tight and his head spun, not just from the smoke, either.
Someone set the barn on fire. They could have killed Timmy.
Old memories surfaced. Dragging Vinny out of the Humvee, struggling to breathe past the pain as bullets sang out. Then the blackness of nothing...and waking up to a hospital bed, much like this one.
Helpless, weak.
Nick had vowed to never be weak.
No choice then, like now.
What was the point of his life, anyway? No longer a SEAL, fighting to keep his country safe. Hell, he couldn’t even keep this ranch and its occupants safe.
He knew the gas can meant someone planned to torch the place. Yeah, the security cameras he’d placed there and the extra precautions he’d taken were good, but not enough. Never enough.
Never good enough.
Guilt pricked him. Why couldn’t he have done more?
Loser, a tiny voice whispered inside.
The ghost of his father’s voice echoed inside his mind. You’ll end up dead in a ditch somewhere in Nashville if you keep going like this.
No, Dad, I’ll end up in a hospital bed, hooked up to these damn machines. But Timmy was safe, and alive, and that was worth it.
Same as it had been worth it to save Vinny’s life.
Being a SEAL had meant everything. But when he’d awakened in that other hospital bed and realized he could never run as fast, maneuver as quickly and be the athlete he’d once been, Nick made the decision to quit. It had been the toughest decision. But he had to be the best, and with his reflexes slower and his body injured, he didn’t want to risk his teammates’ lives. SEALs functioned like a well-oiled machine. When one guy went down, he dragged the others with him.