I like shellfish and am happy with any popped right out of the shell. Oddly enough, Pewter won’t eat them. She eats everything else, including broccoli.
I also happen to know that she knocked over the aquarium and ate the fish. She denies it, but who else would have done it? Mother was so distressed she has never bought another aquarium.
I weakened when I saw those fish flopping around on the floor. Seemed silly to let them go to waste but I didn’t break the aquarium. I swear it. It really was Pewter.
Cat
PEWTER’S FAVORITE CRAB
1 average—size box of white rice
1 pint fresh crabmeat or crab substitute
Cook the rice according to package directions. As it cools, cut the crabmeat into small bites.
Mix together.
IF WE GIVE Pewter the whole amount, she’ll eat it. Instead, we give her a big helping and put the rest in the refrigerator.
Pewter also came from the SPCA. She was a tiny, round gray ball with cigarette burns on her body. Mother brought her home, to my disgust, but when Pewter told me her tale of abuse I decided another cat wouldn’t be that bad.
She loves Mother, sits in her lap, follows her around, and is the jolliest cat I have ever known.
Some stories do have happy endings.
Horse
HORSE COOKIES
1 cup sweet feed
2 to 3 cups wheat bran
Dash of salt
1 cup dark molasses
4 carrots, grated
½ cup brown sugar
1 cup applesauce
Big dash of cinnamon
In a big bowl, mix the sweet feed with 2 cups of bran and a dash of salt.
In a separate bowl, mix the molasses, carrots, brown sugar, applesauce, and cinnamon.
Slowly pour the wet mixture into the dry mixture, stirring to form a thick dough. The batter is supposed to be a bit loose, but if it’s really wet, add up to another cup of bran.
Lightly grease a cookie sheet.
Shape batter into portions the size of a half dollar, squeezing out excess liquid if needed.
Bake at 300°G F. for 1 hour.
Flip the cookies over and bake 45 minutes more, until dry and golden brown.
Check on them frequently to avoid overbaking. Horses don’t appreciate burnt cookies!
THERE ARE MANY variations of this horse cookie recipe and all are good.
Most horse recipes involve molasses. Recently people have begun collecting these, handed down verbally from generation to generation. Most are similar, since a horse’s stomach doesn’t need variety. Consistency is far more important.
Humans, on the other hand, like variety.
If you change your horse’s diet, you should do it very slowly. For instance, if you’ve been feeding only beet pulp and want to switch over to sweet feed, mix a small portion of sweet feed in the pulp.
It’s wise to do this changeover, adding a bit more sweet feed, over a two- to three-week period.
An abrupt change in diet can make horses sick, which, for them, can be fatal. I can throw up a bad mouse. A horse can’t throw up, hence colic and other intestinal problems, which are quite terrible for them.
They can’t eat any meat. Period.
Their teeth are for grinding, so the dentist must come and file off the rough edges once a year at a minimum.
I get my teeth cleaned about once every five years. It’s easier being a cat.
As cats love horses so horses love cats because we are quiet and respectful. Dogs rush around barking or nipping (very naughty) but we tiptoe into stalls or sit on a tack trunk and chat with our equine friends.
I especially enjoy talking with the horses because they see so much more than I do. Their eyes are big and they can see behind, too, whereas I focus intently on what’s in front of me. That’s the difference between predator and prey animals.
Humans spend too much time talking about the food chain. Once we are full we can all get along just fine. They would do well to learn that.
Here’s to full bellies, endless frolic, and laughter for all animals.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
SNEAKY PIE BROWN resides on a farm in Afton, Virginia. She is at work on her next Mrs. Murphy mystery when she isn’t lording it over the other farm animals.
SNEAKY PIE’S COOKBOOK FOR MYSTERY LOVERS
A Bantam Book/May 1999
All rights reserved.
Copyright © 1999 by American Artists, Inc.
Illustrations copyright © 1999 by Katie Cox Shively
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher. For information address: Bantam Books.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Brown, Rita Mae.
Sneaky Pie’s cookbook for mystery lovers/Sneaky Pie Brown.
p. cm.
eISBN: 978-0-307-57397-1
1. Cookery. 2. Cats—Anecdotes. I. Title.
TX714.B79 1999
641.5—dc21 99-12337
CIP
Bantam Books are published by Bantam Books, a division of Random House, Inc. Its trademark, consisting of the words “Bantam Books” and the portrayal of a rooster, is Registered in U.S. Patent and Trademark Office and in other countries. Marca Registrada. Bantam Books, 1540 Broadway, New York, New York 10036.
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