The Tangled Web
Page 17
‘He never got in touch for me to tell him. The year he was supposed to be gone came and went and he hasn’t come back. I get the occasional update on Foursquare about what he’s doing but he never responded to my email asking him to get back in touch. Last week he updated saying he was heading to Ecuador to work with macaws,’ Vicky snorted.
‘That’s shit,’ Flic sneered. She guessed that Vicky’s ex probably felt quite smug being off on his adventure, seeing the world. But he had missed out on one of the biggest events of his life by not responding to Vicky’s email.
‘What about his family?’
‘I’m not in touch with them. They’re all over in Ireland. It’s fine, really. We don’t need them,’ Vicky asserted.
The hum of a vibrating phone interrupted her and Vicky picked up her BlackBerry. Flic watched as her face lit up in a way that it only ever did when Christos was the one sending her a message.
‘I don’t need to ask who that is,’ Flic smiled.
Vicky blushed and stayed silent while she tapped in a response to the message she had received.
‘What’s the story with this Christos guy anyway? Are you and him…?’ Flic pressed.
‘What? Me and Christos? No! He’s got a girlfriend. And umpteen kids.’
‘So why are you blushing then?’ Flic sniggered. ‘Come on, after Adam was talking about him a few weeks ago I went online and had a quick look at his picture. I know how good looking he is,’ she teased.
‘Girlfriend. Kids. That’s all I’m saying,’ Vicky insisted while her face turned fuchsia.
‘He’s hot. That’s all I’M saying,’ Flic winked.
‘I wouldn’t get involved with someone who’s already attached,’ Vicky assured her. ‘No matter how hot he was. And how much of a bitch his girlfriend was.’
‘If he was single…would you?’ Flic wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.
‘I’m not having this discussion!’ Vicky persisted.
‘That’s a yes then,’ Flic grinned.
‘How do you work that out?’
‘If it was a no, you’d say no. So it must be a yes,’ Flic shrugged.
Vicky gave a mock angry expression before the two of them collapsed into hysterical laughter.
‘Ok, it’s a yes. But he’s with someone, so it’s not an option. Not even worth thinking about.’
‘But you HAVE thought about it.’
‘Of course I have.’
‘Do you think he has too? Do you think at some point during all those cosy chats he’s imagined what it would be like to be your boyfriend?’
‘Yeah. I know he has.’
20
MAGNUM PMT’S BLOG
16th April – Spy Another Day
As you may have guessed from the lack of activity on my blog, our little agency is not my top priority at the moment. We have taken a hiatus and haven’t accepted any new clients for a few weeks. To be honest, life as a virtual private investigator was not as glamorous and exciting as we had hoped it would be. And I simply don’t have the time for this company any more. My day job is getting busier and my daughter is getting more mobile, meaning I’m stressed to the max in the evenings.
The Pink Cougar split with her boyfriend, Lame Bond. She wanted to carry on trapping people and to do so would have compromised her relationship with her current boyfriend. So she ended it. Despite the brave face she’s putting on, I know that she’s devastated. I sincerely hope things can work out in the end for them.
It’s my opinion that the Pink Cougar is running out of the emotional strength necessary to do her job. She’s also busy with her work as a trainee plumber(!?!). The situation between her and Lame Bond meant that he no longer wanted to spend time in her company and one of them will have to leave the agency. The relationship between Lame Bond and myself is also strained because of what I am about to write next. Bear in mind he is my brother and knew what was happening, but chose not to tell me.
Sherlock Poems is still the head honcho here but The Pink Cougar and I have lost all respect for him. He and I were a potential couple, but he decided to embark on a relationship with someone else – at the same time that he was sleeping with me – and then chose her. He gave me all the usual excuses about not wanting to get serious. Why does this ALWAYS happen to me? I’m sorely tempted to contact his live-in girlfriend and tell her what’s been going on. To the best of my knowledge, she is unaware of the situation between me and him. I’m far too busy to hunt her down though.
There really doesn’t seem much point in continuing with the business, given the tension between everyone in the agency, trouble that it’s caused and the old wounds re-opened for The Pink Cougar (I won’t blog them). I’ve also started to question my own integrity these last few weeks. My reason for starting this agency was to catch cheaters and expose them for the rats they are. I’d been burned in the past when I realised my ex-boyfriend was already married. I wanted to get revenge on those men and let their partners make an informed choice about what they want to do with their relationships.
What I didn’t count on was finding myself falling for someone who is already attached - with kids. I speak to him every day and know him inside out. He isn’t happy in his relationship, which makes it even more difficult for me to back off. If I knew he was happy with his girlfriend, I could just shrug it off as a crush. But I know he’s not. He’s a really good friend but I wish he was more than that.
I often see him through my day job. Every time I’m told that a client has used his services and I’ll be getting a visit from him, I get butterflies in my stomach.
I haven’t spoken to him about how I feel. How could I possibly do that? It goes against everything I believe in. It goes against what I’ve been doing for a living for the past three months. If I thought he didn’t return my feelings, I could own up to having a little crush on him and the two of us would laugh about it. But I’m starting to think he does return them. I feel so guilty and I haven’t even done anything!
His girlfriend owns a business. I used to visit her business every payday to treat myself. I can’t now. I can’t look her in the eye. I can’t hear him mention her name without blushing from guilt.
How can I possibly continue my work as a honey trapper when I myself am dreaming of breaking up a happy home?
21
To: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
From: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
Subject: Postcards from Diana
Date: 17th April
Hi mate
I’ve got a favour to ask. I know that you’re going to visit family in Cyprus soon and I was wondering if you could send a postcard while you’re out there. It’s not to me though, it’s to Flic’s ex-husband, George. The assignment to trap him is over but he’s started pestering Diana, the original honey she created. We got pissed off at his incessant flirting last night and told him Diana is moving abroad. He asked where and the first place we could think of was Cyprus. We told him she’s going to be offline for a few months. Then he asked for a postcard. Once the postcard’s sent we’ll delete the profile for good.
Vicky
xx
*****
To: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
From: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
Subject: Re: Postcards from Diana
Date: 17th April
Hi
Of course I’ll do it. But why not just delete the profile now and forget about the whole sorry business? Or just block him?
Christos
xx
*****
To: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
From: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
Subject: Re: Re: Postcards from Diana
Date: 17th April
Hey :)
Because it’s still being used to round up another couple of assignments. I wanted to block him but Flic said we should keep it open until Amy’s sent her payment.
Vicky
xx
*****
To: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
From: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Postcards from Diana
Date: 17th April
Hi :)
Of course I’ll help you, agapi mou. Send me his address and I’ll get a postcard sent from Diana to him once I’m there.
I read your new blog.
Christos
xx
*****
To: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
From: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Postcards from Diana
Date: 17th April
Thank you!
Oh, did you? I just had to get some stuff out there. No big deal. I feel better now I’ve gotten it off my chest.
Vicky
xx
*****
To: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
From: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Postcards from Diana
Date: 17th April
I know. I just wanted to let you know I read it ;)
Christos
xx
22
To: enquiries@hunEmail.com
From: mrsamygoodbody@torquaymail.co.uk
Subject: Goodbody v. Goodbody
Date: 29th June
Dear Sirs/Mesdames,
I have been frantically attempting to contact you through the usual email address, to no avail, which is why I am contacting the main address retrieved from your website. It is imperative that I speak to someone within twenty-four hours or I shall be forced to contact another private investigator.
I am no longer satisfied with proof of my husband’s online infidelity, which you were so efficient in providing. He has arranged a spontaneous holiday to Cyprus with a group of male friends and I suspect he is on his way to meet one of your honeys. I believe the woman in question is now living in Cyprus. He leaves on 10th July for a two week break.
I understand that you do not usually take on cases which require any real-life investigation, but I hope you are willing to make an exception since I am an existing client. I am prepared to pay the going rate for international assignments if necessary. However, I believe that your travelling and accommodation expenses and your usual fees combined are significantly cheaper than I would pay for another private investigator to take on this task. I have looked into this and know exactly how much all this will cost. I attempted to secure the services of a local private investigator in Cyprus but they were all fairly ambiguous regarding their fees. It also occurred to me that there may be a conflict of interest in them investigating another private investigator’s activities with my husband. I am unsure of the legalities.
I require proof that they have met and had improper contact. Photographic or video evidence, however brief, should be satisfactory. I’m sure there will be plenty of opportunities for him to have inappropriate physical contact with females (or males) on a holiday of this sort.
I must have your answer within twenty-four hours.
Yours faithfully,
Amy Goodbody.
*****
To: mrsamygoodbody@torquaymail.co.uk
From: adamski@hunEmail.com
Subject: Re: Goodbody v. Goodbody
Date: 29th June
Dear Mrs Goodbody
I acknowledge receipt of your email. I apologise for the delay in responding to you, however it appears that we have not received any email at the other email address you speak of. I will discuss this with my colleagues and revert to you before 9pm this evening. Many thanks for your patience.
Adam Robertson
Senior Investigator at HunE-trap Investigations
*****
To: fx@hunEmail.com,
vicky@hunEmail.com,
mags@hunEmail.com,
weemela@hunEmail.com
From: adamski@hunEmail.com
Subject: Fwd: Re: Goodbody v. Goodbody
Date: 29th June
Please read above email exchange between myself and a Mrs Goodbody. Who is responsible for the case she is talking about?
Adam
*****
To: fx@hunEmail.com,
vicky@hunEmail.com,
adamski@hunEmail.com,
weemela@hunEmail.com
From: mags@hunEmail.com
Subject: Re: Fwd: Re: Goodbody v. Goodbody
Date: 29th June
Since nobody has owned up to this yet, I suggest we have a team meeting this evening at 7pm at the Robertson house.
May I remind you that we were ALL to be briefed on all cases which were taken on? Can whoever is responsible please bring all paperwork to the meeting?
Mags
*****
To: vicky@hunEmail.com
From: fx@hunEmail.com
Subject: Re: Re: Fwd: Re: Goodbody v. Goodbody
Date: 29th June
Shit! What do we do? Blame Pamela?
*****
To: fx@hunEmail.com
From: Vicky@hunEmail.com
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Fwd: Re: Goodbody v. Goodbody
Date: 29th June
I’m owning up. We have nothing left to lose. I’m not with Magnus, you’re not with Adam. We don’t want to be part of HunE-trap Investigations anymore. There’s nothing to be gained by lying now. It’s not like we took any of the new assignments. We haven’t taken on a new one since March. With a bit of luck they’ll chuck us out of the company for good and we’re in the clear.
Vicky
xx
23
29th June
Vicky pulled the blind closed. The glare from the sun was almost blinding her as it streamed through the window onto the screen of her laptop. She began to print all the email exchanges between herself and Amy, Flic and Amy, the chat between Zoe and George and all of the interactions Diana had with George.
Flic put down the copy of Heat magazine she had been pretending to read and peered over Vicky’s shoulder.
‘Is it possible that we could NOT include the chat between Zoe and George? You know the one I’m talking about,’ she cringed. ‘It’s just, I know Adam and I aren’t together any more, but I really don’t want him to see me say those things to someone else.’
‘I thought it wasn’t you saying those things. It was Zoe,’ Vicky raised an eyebrow.
Flic stared pleadingly at Vicky. Vicky saw the guilt in Flic’s eyes and felt a twinge of sympathy. She knew that Flic had caused this mess in the first place but a part of her understood the train of thought Flic had when she was overcome by her own bitterness and took this case on.
Vicky ripped the freshly printed sheets. ‘Let’s not show any of them to Adam or Magnus. We’ll say we deleted it all. They can’t argue with that.’
Flic bowed her head and stared at her own knees. ‘You know, when we start owning up to…stuff, other…stuff might come out that we don’t necessarily want to hear.’ She kept her head bowed but looked over at Vicky through her eyelashes.
‘Like what?’ Vicky frowned.
A soft knock on Vicky’s bedroom door interrupted them and brought Flic to her feet. She padded quickly towards the door and creaked it open.
‘Don Juan and Don Two are downstairs,’ Pamela whispered from the other side. ‘Can I come in?’
Flic opened the door fully and motioned with her hand to Pamela to enter the room. Pamela ignored Flic’s hand on the doorknob and closed the door herself, then stood with her back against it. Her eyes glistened excitedly and she looked ready for a gossiping session. She smoothed back a stray strand of hair from her tight ponytail and smoothed down the jacket of her navy skirt-suit.
‘Going somewhere?’ Flic squinted, eyeing Pamela’s attire with amusement.
‘I thought I’d better look professional. I have a feeling I’m going to get the blame for this mystery case, so I thought I’d better look like I’m on top of things.’
‘I see,’ Vicky smirked. She ha
dn’t seen Pamela wear anything like this before. She suspected that despite all the jibes about her age, Flic was Pamela’s new fashion muse.
‘What do you two know about this Mrs Goodbody? She’s something to do with the girl you wanted me to investigate, isn’t she?’ Pamela pressed.
‘Just hang on a few minutes and you’ll find out,’ Flic advised. She slipped on her shoes and put her hand on Pamela’s shoulder to usher her out of the room. She turned to look at Vicky and Sasha on her way out. ‘Are you two coming?’
‘Yeah,’ Vicky nodded.
She banged the laptop screen down onto the keyboard and pushed it aside. Her stomach churned. She couldn’t remember when she had last felt this nervous. Possibly when she was going in to hospital to have labour induced. She took a deep breath then picked up her daughter, who had been practicing her new walking skills while holding onto the dog. She looked at the happy little face in front of her and wished she could have the same childish innocence and naivety.
‘Come on Sasha. Leave Bidean alone. We need to go downstairs. Time to face the music.’
Vicky, Flic and Pamela each took a seat at Vicky’s kitchen table. Vicky had felt confident - brazen even - about what they were about to tell Adam and Magnus. That had changed with Flic’s vague caution about finding out things they didn’t want to know. She positioned Sasha in her high chair and looked at Adam and Magnus. They were evidently not amused.