by Marie Brown
* * * *
Lorrine emerged from the goddess's small chamber a good deal later, feeling oddly peaceful. In a way, she'd all but given her life away to Biao Tanu. But the rewards. . . For the first time ever, Lorrine felt like she had a purpose.
"You look happier," Adele observed, rising from her meditative position on the floor. "Biao Tanu must have spoken to you directly."
"Not with words, but yes," Lorrine said, smiling with the sheer wonder of the experience. "She spoke to me. And she gave me great gifts, in exchange for what feels like very minor promises. And. . . she told me, don't ask how, because I don't know, but she told me to ask you about love and women."
"Ah, yes," Adele nodded. "She mentioned something of that to me. The goddess can not always express herself clearly to mortals, and she did not wish to confuse you on this very important issue. For you see, she finds the attitudes of the Dargasi towards love utterly offensive."
"I beg your pardon?" Lorrine blinked, suddenly completely at sea. How had the conversation gone there, of all possible directions?
"Come, let us return to the outside world. It is a lovely morning, we can check on the garden."
Lorrine walked with Adele in silence. Then, just as her impatience had her drawing breath to ask another question, Adele spoke.
"When humankind was created, men and women came together to beget the children that would carry on the race. This was normal, and natural, and happened throughout the world of living beings, but it was not always pleasing to the gods. For there was a gift given to humanity by the Creator, one shared by many of the gods as well, and it was called love. Men and women that reproduced together did not always feel love for each other. Men that lay with other men did not always feel love, either, for men will attempt to find pleasure with nearly anything. If you doubt my word on this, talk to a Healer some time. But women, now, there was a different story."
They reached the door to the garden then, and Lorrine followed Adele outside. The sun shone down on them from a sky rich in the deep blue of autumn.
"Always when women lay together there is much love," Adele continued. "There is no other reason for two women to lay together, after all. Women are not as prone to the need to dominate, nor are they led by their hormones to have indiscriminate intercourse with anything animate or inanimate. When two women lay together, there is much joy, and pleasure, and the purest form of love. Biao Tanu finds this especially pleasing, and she expressed concern that you would shy away from that holiest of interactions should the opportunity present itself, for the whole world knows how bigoted the Dargasi are."
Lorrine blushed. She felt the burn clear up into the roots of her hair. "You need have no fear on my account," she managed to say, although her voice didn't want to work through her embarrassment.
"Oh?"
"Yes. I-Kama, she. . . well, Kama is far more than a friend to me. Sort of."
"Sort of? What do you mean by that?"
Lorrine's blush deepened. "Well. There were. . . problems. But if I ever get back to her, under my own power this time, I hope to resolve the problems."
"Lorrine, I can sense that there is much you are not telling me. But I believe I will let you get away with not revealing everything, as long as you understand that Biao Tanu is pleased when two women share love. In fact, she requires it of her followers, that we look for love with women before men. Will this be a problem to you?"
"No," Lorrine whispered, face still burning. She coughed and tried again. "No. I will be happy to. . . you know."
Then Adele grinned. "Just don't ask you for the juicy details, right? It's okay, Lorrine. This is, after all, a thoroughly private topic, which is only to be discussed between you and your beloved. I just promised the goddess I would make certain you understood the way we do things."
Those In Need
Lorrine was well on her way back to Eirian before she felt the unmistakable urge to help a child in need. Downright disorienting, that, since she'd never much cared for children. But she spotted a child with a beggar's cup and a look of hollow-eyed desperation about him. Pathetic, really, a sad little bugger that she couldn't possibly pass by. So she took the little mite to the marketplace with her and used an entire silver coin to buy him enough food to last two days. True, that wouldn't take care of the poor little fellow for very long, but at least she knew he had some food.
And little though it was, the act of kindness eased the agonizing need to help inside Lorrine and let her move on down the road. She hadn't realized when she accepted Biao Tanu's blessing just how powerful the need to help would be, but she wasn't about to refuse the gifts. After all, she'd never, ever felt such acceptance and such purpose in her entire life. If the price of such peace was a bit of charity, then so be it.
The next call resulted in a similar easy fix, another hungry kid. She wondered how long her money would last if she wound up feeding the poor wherever she went, but still bought the kid-a little girl, this time-a decent meal and an apple for later. She'd never noticed needy children before. Most of the time she'd been out and about in the world, her mind had been clouded by Derfek. She hadn't noticed much of anything, then. But now, with her eyes wide open, and prodded by a goddess, she saw things she'd never really imagined.
Passing through a small town built around a sawmill, the call nearly yanked her off her feet. Following it this time led Lorrine straight to an abandoned well, one that had apparently been poorly sited and hit a solid slab of rock before it hit water. In it, frightened and alone, she found an unlucky young boy. He'd fallen in while playing some little boy game, managed to knock himself senseless. So when people came to search for him, they called down the well and heard no response. Of course not, because the poor kid lay unconscious at the bottom. By the time he came to, there was no one near enough to hear his cries for help.
That intervention made Lorrine feel really good about herself and her new calling. The look on the boy's face as he came out of the well was worth the loss of half a day's travel, and the gratitude of his parents warmed her heart for many days thereafter.
So Lorrine moved along the road towards Eirian, feeling mighty pleased with herself and her new role in life.
Then it all changed.
She lay sleeping out in the open one night, out in the rough scrubland just to the northwest of Eirian. Or rather, trying to sleep. This close to the city, she could smell the sea air. She could almost hear the creak of the ships from the docks, she was so close. Sea, docks, ships-such foreign concepts after the Dargasi desert. But she'd called Eirian home for four years, and the sea air smelled exciting and familiar. She could hardly settle herself for sleep, knowing that she'd reach the ancient port city within another day or two.
But finally, she did manage to drop off to sleep, only to be roused by an urgent call, stronger than any she'd yet experienced. She launched herself from her bedroll, disoriented, reaching for her sword.
But no, she had no sword. Why would she? Lorrine was no warrior. The sharpest object she wielded with skill was a needle.
Feeling a bit idiotic for waking with the notion of herself as some kind of sword-wielding heroine, Lorrine pulled her boots on quickly. The call felt desperate, urgent. Like a matter of life or death. She looked at her modest camp in the moonlight, hesitant to leave it unattended, then shrugged. If someone was desperate enough to steal her bedroll, then so be it. Whatever woke her up was urgent. She needed to deal with it right now.
So Lorrine abandoned her camp, following the tug on her soul into the night. Moonlight let her see, but she still stumbled and cursed often, because the urgency demanded she move at a rate most unwise for night travel.
Her crystal lit right before she heard a terrified shriek. Lorrine clamped her hand around it, hoping no one could see the powerful glow spilling through her hand. Even her hand glowed.
"Damn it," Lorrine muttered, and gave up on trying to sneak up on whatever was going wrong ahead. If her whole damn body was going to light up l
ike the crystal, well, no hope for surprise.
So she charged ahead, glowing like a white sun, into a campsite.
"Hey!" she yelled, trying to figure out what was happening. Fast.
Four men with weapons froze for a brief moment, long enough to see and interpret the scene. A woman wrenched away from one of the men and bolted towards Lorrine, away from those who clearly were ready to rape her.
For lack of a real weapon, Lorrine bent down and picked up a handful of rocks.
"Bugger off!" She flung a rock, striking one of the men. "Go on, get out of here!"
"Thtock!" One of the men lurched into action, dodging her next missile. He carried a naked sword. A real one, not the one in his pants. Lorrine swallowed hard, and hoped her goddess felt like helping out.
She threw another rock as the man charged, then held up her hand in a useless protective gesture.
Or maybe not so useless.
The man hit her glow and bounced off it.
What-?
No time to wonder now, just throw another rock. "Get out of here, you scum! All of you! Now! Or I'll-I'll-"
"What're you going to do, missy?" Another one of the men sneered at her, and she almost broke and ran. He snatched up a loaded crossbow from the ground and fired it at her.
The bolt missed.
The man swore, and as if the profanity was a signal, all four of the men started trying to attack. Lorrine grabbed hold of the woman