by Marie Brown
and pulled her close, inside the safety of the glow.
Oh, goddess, what in all hells have you gotten me into?!
She felt a sudden sense of startlement, as the men attacked her glow with swords and daggers and it began to waver. Then she felt a prickly rage course through her, and then all the men were yelling. Sparks flew when their weapons connected with the white glow, making the men drop the metal objects, shaking their hands as if stung. Then something seemed to pour through her. Lorrine opened her mouth, and a wave of fear rolled out of it. All four of the men bolted, faces distorted with terror.
Lorrine watched them run until they vanished into the night. When they were gone, and her glow faded, she released her hold on the woman she'd rescued.
"Thanks," the woman said, raising a shaky hand to brush curly red hair back from her eyes. "I thought they were going to. . . "
"Well, they didn't," Lorrine said. "Although they might try again. Maybe I'd better stay here the rest of the night. Damn."
"What's wrong? And who are you, anyway?"
"Nothing's wrong, just regretting that I couldn't take the time to break camp and bring my gear. No matter, I'll get it in the morning."
"Do you really think they'll be back? After what you did?" The hair fell back into her eyes, and she shoved it away again.
"I don't even know what I did," Lorrine confessed. "For all I do know, they've run off to find some friends."
"Possible, but not likely," the woman judged. "You scared the dreckel right out of them. Who are you, anyway? My name's Terrill."
"I'm Lorrine. Nice to meet you. Wish it had been under better circumstances."
"Thanks." Terrill grinned, then started picking up swords, holding them carefully flat between arm and body. "I'll just collect these, I'm sure I can sell them for a good price."
Lorrine suddenly noticed that the woman had not only a fire, giving light for them to see by, but a large wagon filled with stuff.
"You must be a merchant."
"Indeed. And right now, I'm a tired merchant. You can stay if you want, but I'm going to go inside the wagon, despite how warm the evening is. The door has a lock on it. I'll be fine. Not that I'm not grateful for your assistance, understand, but I'm bloody well exhausted."
Terrill picked up the crossbow in the hand not loaded with edged weapons and marched towards her wagon, leaving Lorrine staring in open-mouthed shock. And a bit of admiration, as well, because she would have sliced herself had she attempted to handle three swords and two daggers. Terrill just tucked them casually under her left arm like they were nothing but sticks.
Then the merchant woman opened the back door of her wagon, dropped her load of weapons inside, pulled herself up the steps, and shut the door firmly behind her.
Fine, then. Lorrine shrugged, then started picking her way back to her own camp. What a strange encounter!
Strange, and terrifying. She hadn't ever thought Biao Tanu might send her into a dangerous situation with no protection other than a glow. But what could she do? She still didn't want to give up her protection against magic, not at all. Maybe she should find her way back to Terrill in the morning, see if she could have one of those swords. Then she'd only need a teacher and several years of dedicated learning before she could protect herself.
The Wait Ends
When Lorrine reached Eirian, a cross between exultation and pure terror wrapped around her. Somewhere behind the high white walls of the ancient city Kama waited for her. She hoped. She had a pretty strong notion that maybe Kama had moved on by now. After all, who could blame her if she had? After the way Lorrine had hurt her, of course she'd be likely to find someone new. No real reason under the sun why she'd wait for Lorrine to come back and hurt her again.
No reason, of course, except love.
But Lorrine didn't yet deserve that love from Kama. So she straightened her shoulders and marched right through the northwest gate, ready to dive back into her old home territory and find the woman who should have been her lover.
Easier said than done, of course.
"Kama?" Louella gave her a blank look, and Lorrine's heart sank. "Oh, wait, you mean that blonde that used to rent from me. She's been gone a long time. Fell on hard times, as I remember, but I haven't seen her since she quit paying her board."
"Thank you," Lorrine said, even though she felt more like cursing instead.
She tried the Kitten next. Kama had worked at the Knittin' Kitten for so long, it seemed inconceivable that she wouldn't be there.
Mistress Banchek spotted her immediately. The woman had always watched her shop with an eagle eye. That part hadn't changed.
But a new girl sat in what should have been Kama's place, the spot right by the big front window with the best light available. Lorrine felt a very uncomfortable tightness in her throat as she looked at the wrong person sitting where Kama belonged, as Mistress Banchek bore down on her, scowling.
"You! What are you doing here? The nerve you have, coming back here after what you've done!"
"Mistress Banchek, where's Kama?"
"What do you care, you thoughtless little trollop? I wouldn't tell you even if I knew!"
"Please," Lorrine choked out around sudden panic. "Please. . . "
Mistress Banchek narrowed her eyes. "And what would you want with Kama, then? Looking to see if she's made something of her life so you can wreck it again?"
Lorrine noticed all the seamstresses and needlewomen nearby listening to the altercation avidly, although they kept working.
"No, Mistress. I need to find her. To. . . to apologize."
"Humph." Mistress Banchek looked as stubborn and immobile as a brick wall. "An apology doesn't begin to repair the damage you did, girl. You ruined the life of my best needlewoman ever. She went straight into the gutter after you left. Last I saw her, she was all but dead, because of you. And you think I'm going to tell you where she went?"
"Almost dead? Please, Mistress, tell me-"
"No. I'll tell you nothing. Maybe you should check with the charities, see if anyone matching her description got buried. Gods know she was in poor enough condition, she might have died moments after the last time I saw her. Now get out of here, before you cause any further harm to my business and my girls."
Lorrine tried to protest again, but Mistress Banchek advanced like an unstoppable wave of anger and pushed Lorrine back out into the street with the sheer force of her glare.
Damn.
Now what?
She wondered what had happened to Kama to leave her in a state where she was almost dead. Was she still alive? Had she truly died of a broken heart? Such things only happened in tragic romantic ballads. . . Didn't they?
Feeling rather numb inside, Lorrine started walking. She wasn't at all sure where to go, where to look, what to do. She could really use the help of those damned shadows right about now.
Wait a minute. Lorrine reached for the necklace she wore now, a beautiful clear quartz crystal on a bit of leather thong. She'd never tried anything of the sort before, but maybe if she asked nicely enough, Biao Tanu would help her, give her some kind of guidance.
Because Kama wasn't dead.
Lorrine paused under a tree. The Kitten faced a good-sized city park, a nice oval expanse of green grass and stately old trees. People liked to walk here, or lay in the shade and nap, or snuggle on the benches. Or even step off the busy main road for a moment of prayer, just as Lorrine did now.
Crystal in hand, Lorrine bowed her head and tried to force her mind into forming a coherent prayer. But really all that came out was a wordless cry for help, laced through with her fear and desperation. Maybe she didn't deserve any better. Maybe, after what she'd done, she didn't deserve to know if Kama lived or not. Maybe it was her fate to wonder forever what had happened after she'd left the woman she loved.
The crystal didn't give her any immediate answers, but Lorrine felt a faint hint of something, tugging at her from the central city. It felt similar to the need to help she felt
these days, so she shrugged and started walking again, tucking the crystal back under her tunic. Maybe the goddess was providing her guidance. Anyway, it wasn't as if she had any better ideas, so she'd follow the nebulous feeling.
It led her to a place she'd never thought to find herself, the Library District. Eirian hosted one of the biggest and best stocked libraries in the entire known world, and the building containing all that knowledge had sprouted an attendant cluster of school buildings, scribes' halls, and bookbinders. What under the sun would Kama be doing here? She was a craftswoman, not an academic.
But that hint of direction sent her to stand in front of the steps of one of the schools. A rather plain, off-white colored building, it had a few of the ever-popular decorative columns gracing its front, but seemed otherwise unremarkable. She stared at it, chewing her lip. Why was she here? Why would Kama be in such a place?
Well, why in hell wouldn't she? Lorrine shrugged, and went up the stairs. She opened the door and stuck her head in.
She spotted the type of watchdog she expected immediately, a woman with a desk overlooking the front entrance.
"Hello?"
"Can I help you?" the woman said, with a less than welcoming look. Perhaps she simply wasn't expecting a random Dargasi to pop out of nowhere.
"Possibly. In fact, I really hope so." Lorrine slipped the rest of the way into the building, tucking her hair behind her ear nervously. "Um. I'm not crazy, really I'm not, but I'm looking for a friend of mine, and I heard she might be here."
"And what is your