An Author's Angst

by Maggie Ryan

  "Hello," she said, forcing herself not to growl her greeting.

  "Ah, so she lives." Lizzy's cheerful voice had Venia relaxing.

  "Well, she does for the next few hours," Venia said, walking to the kitchen. "I can't promise that the phone will be answered tomorrow."

  Lizzy instantly responded with concern. "Honey, what's wrong? I was really hoping to hear you giving me the rundown on your newest plot line."

  "Oh, I can do that," Venia assured her as she took her fresh cup of coffee back to her chair. "Imagine this; an author, one who has seen some success, is found one day, slumped over her shattered laptop, nothing but an empty husk. Make that an empty husk with a very red ass."

  "Hmm, while that sounds a bit intriguing, I'm getting the definite impression that the writing is not going so well."

  "Geeze, you think?"

  "Venia, let me help. I'll take you to lunch and we can see if a brisket sandwich can spark your fire."

  Sitting back in her recliner, Venia shook her head. "Ha, I don't need beef to set me on fire. Jeffrey managed that without the benefit of lighter fluid or charcoal. I'm afraid that not even bribery will work. Besides, I've been grounded."

  "I'm listening—not out of morbid curiosity, you understand—just concerned. Tell me all about that fire." She didn't give Venia a chance to do so as she instantly spoke again. "Wait a minute, grounded? What do you mean grounded? You aren't sitting there naked are you?"

  Venia almost spewed the sip of coffee she'd just taken. Ever had taken them into her confidence the first time Rob introduced her to his version of grounded. The young woman was not only restricted to the confines of their home, she was kept totally nude. She'd also admitted that she found the restrictions to be quite effective.

  "No, I'm in my gown," Venia said with a smile. She explained that Jeffrey had decided it would behoove her to stay home and write. "Believe me, even with his kiss and cuddle this morning, I think it would be a very good idea to obey."

  "That does it," Lizzy said. "I'm bringing lunch and reinforcements."

  "No, wait," Venia said, almost spilling her coffee as she sat up quickly. "I need to write, not gossip."

  "You have to eat, and, Venia, it is not gossiping when sharing your concerns with a friend. Besides even Dr. Humphries can't want you to be sitting at home so depressed you are talking about dried out husks. I'm not taking no for an answer. I promise I won't hang around too long. See you in a few."

  Venia looked at the phone in her hand. Lizzy hadn't given her time to argue and as she set it down on the table, she realized that she was grateful for the reprieve. She did have to eat and could use the support. Ignoring the blinking cursor of her laptop, she went into her bedroom, reapplied the Arnica and changed into a skirt and t-shirt. No one need know that the only underwear she had put on was her bra. For the second time that day, the moment Lizzy appeared on her doorstep, Venia reached out and practically dragged her visitor into the house.

  "Oh, honey," Lizzy said, managing to wrap her arms around her friend despite the brown bags in her hands. "It's going to be all right. I promise, we'll figure it out."

  Chapter Fourteen

  "Thank you, that was delicious," Venia said as she worked to clear away the wrappings. "I'm glad that a BBQ place has opened."

  "Me too," Lizzy agreed, pouring them both another glass of tea. "But, I didn't come here to discuss food. Sit down and fill me in."

  Venia did just that. By the time she was done, she'd told Lizzy almost everything that had happened since the book club meeting the week before. "God, I can't remember being any happier and any more scared."

  "Venia, you deserve to be happy. You give so much and I hope you know that Greg would want you to go ahead with your life."

  "I do know that," Venia said with a soft smile. "I have no feelings that he isn't just as happy for me as I am with Jeffrey."

  "So, you aren't scared that you are going too fast? I mean, from what you described, it sounds like it was a pretty intense session."

  "Are you scared after Marilyn has blistered your behind?"

  Lizzy smiled and shook her head. "No, I might be a bit worried before that happens, but once I've been spanked, I feel nothing but relief and gratitude that she loves me enough to take me in hand."

  "That's how I feel," Venia said. "Though Jeffrey is an expert with a hand and my hairbrush, he can also light a fire in my heart with just one look and that's not even considering how he makes me feel when he touches me."

  "Are you worried he's going to spank you or whatever to the point that you don't consider it care, but something more like abuse?"

  "Heavens no! I trust him implicitly. I love him, Lizzy, and believe he loves me just as much. Hell, I'll crawl across his knees for the rest of my life never fearing he's going to take me too far."

  Lizzy's smile was brief before concern filled her eyes again. "I'm glad to hear that. But, honey, I still don't understand why you stated you are so frightened."

  "I know you and the others thought I was just teasing or overreacting when I told you I've hit a block. Lizzy, for the first time, I'm truly terrified that I've written my last book." She blinked back tears. "I know my books don't do anything but offer a few hours of entertainment. They don't offer advice on how to improve your life. They don't answer probing questions about serious matters. But, they are my babies. I nurture and love each one. I read every word and smile when they flow one into the other." She lost the battle to hold back her tears as the first spilled down her cheeks.

  Lizzy moved to hug her friend. She didn't attempt to tease or laugh away her concerns. Venia's body shook with the force of her sobs and Lizzy quietly offered her concern and support by simply holding her close. It took several minutes before Venia began to calm and when she pulled away, she accepted the napkin that was pressed into her hand.

  "Have you not managed to write anything?" Lizzy asked after Venia had pulled herself together.

  "Oh, I've written," Venia exclaimed. "I've written a bunch of drivel that is. You should have seen Jeff's face when he questioned me about my last plot. God, I knew it was nothing but crap when I wrote it but just kept going. I deserved a spanking for that alone." She paused and gave a tentative smile. "Lizzy, I practically begged Jeffrey to spank me. He was willing to let me off scot-free because I had made well over my word count, but I just couldn't be as generous with myself." She proceeded to give her friend a quick run-down of all the files that had been deleted.

  "Well, at least you are trying," Lizzy said. "No one can fault you for that. Though, I'm going to have to bite my tongue the next time I see Dina."

  A giggle escaped to lighten the air as Venia agreed. "I'm just praying I don't call her Jessica by mistake." The two laughed and Venia stood, Lizzy following as they went into the living room. "I started another book this morning. I mean, another after I deleted the first. I know it needs some work and I got stuck right before you called, but maybe I can make it work."

  "May I read it?"

  "I guess you should," Venia agreed reluctantly. "Just remember, it is nothing more than a first draft." Handing Lizzy the laptop, she took her seat and sipped from her tea as she waited for her friend's opinion. Though it had taken her hours to write it, it took far less time for Lizzy to read. After scrolling down through the pages, she finally looked up from the laptop.

  "Should I even ask or is it so terrible you can't say anything?" Venia asked.

  "It's not terrible," Lizzy offered and then shrugged. "It's nothing like any of your other books though." Pausing she took a moment. "I'm not saying that is necessarily a bad thing. I'm a bit surprised that's all."

  "You are the one that suggested I go a different direction," Venia pointed out a bit more sharply than she intended.

  "I know," Lizzy agreed, her tone not indicating that she'd been offended. "I just thought you were going to write a medical or biological thriller. I didn't realize you'd decided to, um, write sort of in a historical genre."

/>   Venia sighed. "I wasn't getting far with science, well, not that sort of science. I just thought that going in another direction might be easier or at least allow me to make my word count."

  "Well, I see that you might have hit a wall, but you have a little over 3,000 words. Do you have to hit 8K because you didn't have yesterday's done?"

  "No, Jeff said it was 4K a day and we both figured some days, if it starts to really flow, I'll write more to catch up."

  Lizzy passed the computer back. "Then, I'd better go and let you return to work. I promised not to stay too long."

  Venia was very well aware that her friend was being kind. She knew that if what she'd read had been exciting or even interesting, Lizzy would not be so careful with her words or as quick to leave. Acknowledging that it wasn't Lizzy's responsibility to help her write her book and that she'd offered her love and support in a far more personable way, she set the laptop aside and walked her to the door.

  "Thanks, Lizzy. You've been a good friend."

  "I just wish I could really help."

  The two hugged and Venia kept a smile on her face as Lizzy drove away. Glancing at the clock, she saw that she only had a few more hours before Jeffrey came to pick her up for the cookout. Determined to show both he and Lizzy that she was making a true effort, she returned to her chair and once again stared at the blank screen under the chapter heading.

  Hours later it was the phone that once more had her fingers pausing. Saving the document, she placed the computer on the table and picked up her phone. A smile lit her face as she saw the name on the screen.

  "Hello, Professor."

  "Hi, honey. Just thought I'd call and let you know I'm on my way."

  "Gosh, is it that time already?" Venia asked, amazed that time had flown by so quickly.

  "I'm going to assume that means you've been so engrossed in your story that you've forgotten the time," Jeffrey said. "Don't panic. It will take me about forty-five minutes to get home and change. I'll be by to get you in an hour."

  "That sounds perfect. Oh, should I have called Violet to ask if I could bring anything?"

  His chuckle had her body tingling. "No need. I've got our contribution covered. I'm bringing the beer. I'll see you soon."

  After hanging up, Venia began to get ready. She took a shower and took the time to blow her hair dry, using the round brush that Lorelei assured her would help keep her curls in line. Deciding that going without panties might be fine in her own home, but something not done in public, she pulled on a pair of yellow panties and was glad to discover they weren't too tight across her butt. The swelling from her paddling had gone down with the regular application of Arnica. Whoever had developed that particular product deserved the Noble Peace Prize as far as she was concerned. She giggled as she wondered if the discovery had been done by a caring dominant who wished to provide relief to his submissive, or if a submissive had needed to find something that offered comfort after having her rear roasted. She pulled a dress over her head, grateful that it buttoned down the front so that the opening was large enough not to mess up her hair. After buttoning it, she smoothed down the skirt and tightened the red belt at her waist. The skirt flared out a bit and as she slipped into her sandals, she smiled. The dress was not vintage but did reflect those worn by the women in the fifties with its red and white striped pattern. Well, she did feel a bit like June Cleaver as she pushed pearl studs into her ears. It didn't matter that she was going to a back-yard cookout, what mattered was that she wanted to see Jeff's eyes light up in pleasure when she opened the door.

  * * * * *

  "You look gorgeous," Jeffrey said when she opened the door.

  "Oh, and here I was hoping to hear you dropped by for a kiss and a cuddle," Venia said with the cutest mock pout he'd ever seen.

  "I'm waiting to be pulled inside," he teased and laughed when she obliged, pulling on his arm. Once inside, he pulled her to him, making sure she understood he'd be ready and more than willing to provide kisses and cuddles whenever she needed. When they broke apart, he held her out a bit, his hands dropping to her waist.

  "I meant what I said, you are beautiful."

  "Thank you," Venia said. "I know I might be a bit overdressed but admit I was a bit worried about squeezing into my jeans."

  "Babe, you can wear whatever you want and I don't wish you to be uncomfortable. Of course, we could skip the cookout and you could get even more comfortable."

  "As tempting as that is, I refuse to explain to Charles why he has no beer on hand."

  Jeffrey laughed and kissed her again. Though he was thoroughly enjoying the conversation, he noticed that she'd not once mentioned what she'd accomplished that day. Remembering his statement that she needed to eat, he had no problem setting that discussion aside. Granted, they would be having it, but it could wait.

  As they drove to Charles' and Violet's, she told him that she hoped he wasn't upset but that Lizzy had come over.

  "Honey, I never said you couldn't have people over or talk on the phone. I'm glad you respected my wishes that you not leave the house, but, Venia, you'll know the difference between the grounding I suggested for today and the grounding that will happen if you ever do anything to deserve it."

  "Um, okay. I'm getting the distinct impression that will be something I'd like to avoid."

  Pushing the button to turn off the car, he turned and patted her thigh. "I agree you might find it a bit uncomfortable, but…" He paused and leaned over to kiss her. "I admit I would find it quite pleasurable." He watched her face color and felt her leg quiver under his palm. "But, until that time, you don't need to fret about it. Come on, let's join the party."

  After helping her from the car, grinning at the flash of thigh he detected as he swung her down, he grabbed the igloo from the backseat. They walked hand in hand to the door.

  "It's about time," Charles said as he opened the door. "I'm almost out of beer."

  Jeffrey laughed as he handed over the cooler. "Nice to know what's more important."

  "That comment was directed strictly at you," Charles said, bending to give Venia a kiss on her cheek. "Welcome, Venia, it's great to see you. Please come in." Jeffrey just shook his head as Charles chuckled. "Now that you're in, let's go out back."

  The coals had been lit and friends greeted the new arrivals. Venia thanked Violet for the invitation. "Oh, girl, believe me, we've been trying to get this lunk to wake up for a while now."

  "I'd take offense to that if I hadn't already kicked my own butt. Believe me, I will regret every day I lost with this gorgeous woman." At Venia's puzzled expression, he explained that Charles had attempted to introduce them at least a year earlier.

  "Hmm, and who was it that mentioned something about the absent minded professor?" Venia teased and then kissed his cheek. "We'll just pretend you've received a tardy slip."

  Jeffrey laughed and patted her backside, unconcerned that the gesture caused Venia to gasp or their friends to chuckle. "I also seem to remember telling someone that it was only naughty girls who need worry about going to the principal's office."

  Ever and Violet laughed and taking Venia's hands, pulled her away. "Go cook something," Violet suggested. "It's time for some girl talk."

  "Yes, Dr. Humphries," Dina said, waving him away. "As a fellow scientist, I must do some research. After all, my HOH is still waiting for that judgment to come in."

  Brandon gave a dramatic sigh. "I guess I don't have to wait any longer. It appears your butt is safe, Dina." She grinned and then yelped as he gave her a hard swat.

  "Hey!"

  "Oh, sorry, my dear. I thought you might like a bit of impetus to catch up with your friends."

  Jeffrey chuckled as Dina squealed and called for the others to wait for her. Once the group had disappeared into the kitchen, he and Brandon joined the other men around the large grill.

  "Next time, maybe you'll pay attention when I try to introduce you to someone," Charles said, offering Jeffrey one of the beers he'd brought
.

  Taking a sip, Jeffrey shook his head. "It is my prayer there won't be any need for future introductions. I've found the only one I'll ever need." He shook Jim O'Brien's hand. "Seems your wife is very willing to help me in my courting. I went in to get a couple of donuts this morning and she didn't hesitate to tell me that donuts just wouldn't do."

  Jim laughed heartily. "That's my Ange. She is not only an excellent baker, she has no problem telling her customers they don't know what they want. I used to wonder if she did so just to make sure whatever she'd baked would not be left in the displays overnight, but have to admit, the woman seems almost physic at times."

  "Well, regardless, the muffin was a much better idea and she was able to decorate it perfectly. It's obvious she thinks a great deal of Venia."

  "We all do and are very happy to hear that she appears happy," Robert Montgomery said, his son cradled in one arm, a beer held in his hand.

  Jeffrey could almost hear the unspoken words and had no doubts that he'd hear from Rob personally if he heard that Venia was no longer happy. Despite that, he wasn't worried. He didn't feel the need to assure Rob that he had no intention of ever having Venia be truly unhappy again.

  "Your son is a good looking boy," Jeffrey said, changing the course of the interchange. "Samuel Augustus Montgomery is a great name by the way. Sam makes perfect sense. Whose idea was it to have his initials be a shortened version of his full name?"

  "Ever's of course," Rob admitted. "She's the creative one in this family."

  "Speaking of creative, how's your project coming along? Venia finally breaking through her writer's block?" Charles asked as he seasoned the steaks with salt and pepper in preparation of placing them on the grill.