The Hornbeam Tree

by Susan Lewis

  ‘Which only gives you two days to get all the quotes and expert opinions you need,’ Katie responded, ‘so you’re right, you should go tonight, it’ll give you a fresh start in the morning. I’ll plough on through my copy of the twenty-first century’s version of Mein Kampf and if there’s anything else I can help with, like making some calls, or tracking someone down, you just let me know.’

  Michelle looked from one to the other. ‘Well, I guess that’s decided then.’

  ‘Sounds like it,’ Katie responded. ‘In fact, if you left in the next half an hour you’d be gone before Molly gets home. Not that I’m throwing you out, you understand.’ She smiled, and hoped her real feelings didn’t show, because in truth, she was longing for Michelle to go. Not that she didn’t want her to come back again soon, but at the moment she needed the space for herself as much as for Molly, because deep down inside she was bitterly angry with Michelle for getting pregnant now. They hadn’t mentioned it, either of them, but Katie had seen the email to Tom so knew her earlier suspicions were correct, and she was finding it extremely hard to stop herself thinking of how often in the past Michelle had somehow contrived to stage an important event that overshadowed the one in which Katie was involved.

  ‘Call me as soon as you get to London,’ she said, hugging Michelle before she left, and already feeling guilty for the way she was thinking.

  ‘Of course,’ Michelle promised. ‘And I’ve got my mobile, so if you need me before that, you’ll be able to get hold of me.’

  Katie nodded and hugged her again. It wasn’t that she begrudged Michelle a second child, or her happiness with Tom – though God knew both were feeling like slaps in the face right now – it was the fear of Molly being neglected and lonely that was really upsetting her. Why on earth would Michelle and Tom want to put up with a problematical teenager who wasn’t even theirs, when they had a brand new baby of their own to make a fuss of?

  Molly’s stomach was all in knots as she approached Judy’s oak-panelled front door with its bottle-bottom window panes and shiny brass knocker. She was like, so freaked out and scared, she’d probably have run away if Judy hadn’t popped her nets back at that moment and spotted her coming. Molly’s heart turned over. She had to go through with it now, and anyway, it was OK, because she wanted to. It was all going to work out and end up being just like the DOLs said it would, because no-one would let Michelle stay in the house once they knew what she’d been doing, and then everything would be back like it was before, just her and her mum, and then it wouldn’t even really matter that Brad hadn’t called for three days. Anyway Toby had told Allison he was definitely going to be at the party on Saturday, so she’d see him then.

  ‘Hello love,’ Judy said, pulling open the front door. ‘This is a surprise. Everything all right?’

  Molly nodded, and felt herself colouring up as she stepped into Judy’s plushly carpeted hallway, where the banister was all new and gleaming, and the wallpaper was green with white stripy patterns from Laura Ashley or somewhere like that. Sometimes she wished they lived in one of these new houses on the edge of the village, where everything was modern and always seemed to work, but really she wished they didn’t live in Membury Hempton at all and were still in their lovely house back in London, where all her friends were, and before her mum had got ill.

  ‘Would you like something to drink?’ Judy offered, leading her through to the kitchen.

  ‘Um, OK. Where are the boys?’

  ‘Jason’s up in bed with flu, and Lester’s gone to his gran’s for tea. Apple juice, all right?’

  ‘Yeah, that’s fine thanks.’

  As Judy poured she glanced back over her shoulder and smiled. ‘Sit down,’ she said, nodding towards the round pine table with its matching rail-back chairs. ‘Biscuit? Slice of cake?’

  ‘No, nothing, thanks,’ Molly answered, letting her school bag slide to the cushion-tiled floor as she sank down in a chair.

  ‘So,’ Judy said, bringing two glasses to the table and sitting down too, ‘how’s everything with you? School OK?’

  ‘Mm,’ Molly answered, taking a sip.

  Judy eyed her encouragingly, but it seemed she had no more to say, and was clearly going to look anywhere but at her. ‘So everything’s all right,’ she stated finally, ‘yet I’m getting the feeling it isn’t really, and that’s why you’re here.’

  Still Molly’s eyes couldn’t quite make it to hers.

  ‘Whatever it is, you can tell me,’ Judy said gently, though she suspected she already knew, and was wondering how the heck she was going to handle this, when Katie had remained adamant all along that she should be the one to tell Molly.

  ‘Well, um, it’s …’ Molly said, looking down at her juice, ‘it’s Michelle.’

  Not having expected that, Judy frowned. ‘What about her?’ she asked.

  Molly took a breath, and shrugged as she turned to look out of the window. ‘It’s, like, well … She does things,’ she said, feeling herself going all hot and prickly.

  ‘What kind of things?’

  ‘You know, those kind of things.’

  Judy was quiet for a moment, hoping this wasn’t going where she now suspected it was. ‘I’m not sure I do,’ she responded.

  Molly’s face was on fire, and she was starting to feel a bit sick. ‘She like, you know, touches me,’ she said, keeping her eyes fixed on her glass.

  Judy watched her, and felt her heart aching, for she recognized this immediately for what it was – a desperate attempt to make everything go back to the way it had been before. ‘I’m not sure I understand,’ she said, needing to be certain that she really was reading this correctly. ‘What do you mean, she touches you?’

  Molly swallowed and felt sweat breaking out in her armpits. ‘You know, in places where she shouldn’t,’ she said in a whisper.

  Circling her hands round her glass, Judy took a deep breath. Knowing she had to tread very carefully now, she said, ‘When did this happen?’

  So much blood was rushing to Molly’s head she could hardly think. ‘Um, well, like it’s happened a few times,’ she mumbled. ‘I can’t really remember which days.’

  ‘I see. And the reason you’re here now is because you want me to tell your mum, is that right?’

  Molly nodded and kept her head down.

  Hardly daring to think about how Katie was going to take this, never mind Michelle, Judy said, ‘Look at me, Molly.’

  Molly’s eyes almost came up.

  ‘I know you understand what a very serious accusation this is,’ Judy said, ‘so are you sure you haven’t misinterpreted something, or just got the wrong end of the stick?’

  ‘No, I’m sure,’ Molly told her, sounding quite firm, though the colour was draining from her cheeks now, leaving her looking horribly strained and afraid.

  ‘OK. Then you sit here,’ Judy said, ‘and I’ll go round to see your mum.’ She waited for Molly to protest, but she only hung her head again and clung on to her juice.

  Judy got up from the table, gave Molly’s shoulder a comforting squeeze as she passed, then slipped on a fleece jacket. ‘Listen out for Jason, will you?’ she said. ‘And help yourself to anything from the fridge.’

  A few minutes later Judy was walking across Katie’s garden, still trying to come up with the best way to break this. She really didn’t have much of a plan at all, as rounding the corner of the house, she almost collided with Katie struggling in with a basket of logs.

  ‘Judy!’ Katie gasped, almost dropping the basket. ‘You gave me the fright of my life.’

  ‘Sorry. I didn’t realize you were there,’ Judy responded. ‘Here, let me give you a hand,’ and taking one of the handles she helped her across the kitchen to the sitting-room hearth where newspaper and kindling were already crackling away.

  ‘It’s turning chilly now,’ Katie remarked, placing a couple of logs in the flames.

  ‘Mm, yes,’ Judy said, looking at the printed papers scattered about the floor. ‘Seems lik
e you’ve been busy.’

  ‘We all have,’ Katie told her. ‘Though Laurie and Michelle more than me, and please don’t ask what it’s about, because I promise Tom will tell it much better when the time comes.’ She sat back on her heels and used her wrist to push aside a stray strand of her wig. ‘So what brings you here at this hour?’ she said, already sensing that something wasn’t quite right. ‘I thought you might be Molly. I’m expecting her any minute.’

  Judy took a breath, and going to perch on the edge of the sofa, she said, ‘Molly’s over at my house.’

  Katie’s surprise turned rapidly to concern. ‘Is she all right?’ she asked. ‘Has something happened?’

  ‘Not exactly,’ Judy answered awkwardly, ‘though Molly’s saying it has.’

  Katie was confused.

  ‘You need to brace yourself a bit for this,’ Judy cautioned. ‘She’s just told me that Michelle’s been abusing her … Now I know it’s not true,’ she hastily added, as Katie’s face paled with shock, ‘so don’t worry, it’ll go no further than me, but she wanted me to tell you.’

  Katie covered her face with her hands and began shaking her head in despair. ‘I knew something was going on with her,’ she said brokenly, ‘but I never dreamt it was something like this. What did she say, exactly?’

  Hating to repeat it, Judy said, ‘That Michelle’s been touching her in places she shouldn’t.’

  Katie’s misery was complete. ‘That she’d go this far,’ she said almost to herself. ‘To accuse Michelle of something so horrible … What on earth did she think it was going to prove?’

  Knowing Katie already knew the answer to that, Judy said, ‘You’ll have to tell her the truth now.’

  Katie’s eyes closed. ‘I was going to do it tonight,’ she said, her voice trembling on the words. ‘Michelle’s gone to London with Laurie to give us …’ She took a breath, then stared blindly down at the fire.

  ‘Would you like to come and talk to her at my place?’ Judy offered. ‘I can go upstairs out of the way.’

  Katie considered it for a moment, then shook her head. ‘No,’ she said. ‘Tell her to come home. I think we need to be here.’

  Judy got up. ‘You know where I am,’ she said. ‘If you need to call, or if there’s anything I can do …’

  ‘Thanks.’

  After Judy had gone Katie remained sitting on the floor, feeling the horror of it sliding through her again and again. She held her breath, as though somehow it would help her to centre and be strong, but when she let it go she was still sinking in a quagmire of self-blame and despair. How could she, who prided herself on getting it right for others, be getting it so badly wrong for herself and Molly?

  She went into the kitchen and opened the small cupboard where she kept her herbal remedies. Though nothing she took would put this right now, she needed something to calm her and help her to find some inner strength, because this was no time to start falling apart. She had to hold it together for Molly, let her know that it would be all right in the end, it really would.

  A few drops of hornbeam and several deep breaths later, she closed the cupboard door and started to pray. She honestly didn’t know if there was a God up there, but right now she needed to believe, so she would. He had to help them through this, make sure she didn’t break down as she told Molly what was going to happen, because she needed to make her understand that there was nothing they could do to alter it, especially not rejecting Michelle.

  Hearing Molly’s footsteps passing the kitchen window, she tightened the clasp of her hands and sent up one last prayer before the door opened. Fleetingly she wished she’d asked Judy to come back with Molly, then she heard Judy’s voice telling Molly it would be all right.

  A moment later the door opened, but only Molly came in, and seeing her mother sitting, waiting, she looked for a moment as though she was going to bolt. But then she heaved her bag on to the counter top and closed the door.

  Katie watched her trying to overcome her nerves – telling stories to Judy about Michelle was one thing, telling her mother was going to be another altogether. It was, of course, why she’d gone to Judy in the first place.

  ‘Come and sit down,’ Katie said gently.

  Molly glanced over, and stayed where she was.

  ‘It’s all right,’ Katie told her. ‘We can sort this out.’

  Molly looked away, her face pinched with defiance, her body taut as though ready to fight.

  ‘It’s not true, is it?’ Katie said. ‘What you told Judy about Michelle.’

  Molly’s eyes flashed. ‘Yes it is!’ she snapped. ‘She’s been touching me …’

  ‘Molly.’

  ‘She has!’ Molly cried. ‘Why don’t you believe me? She’s been putting her hands on me …’

  ‘Stop,’ Katie said firmly. ‘I hear what you’re saying, but now I want you to listen to me. Are you listening?’

  Molly didn’t answer.

  ‘I want you to consider for a moment what this could do to Michelle,’ Katie said. ‘Her whole life has been about taking care of children. She wants to regain custody of Robbie, and she’s going to be having another baby soon, so accusing her of something like this could totally ruin her life. And if it goes beyond these walls there will be no going back from it. She’ll never recover her standing, or regain people’s trust, because no-one ever does after a scandal like this. So now I want you to think very carefully about what you’re saying, and what it could mean to someone who actually cares very much about you, and then you can tell me if you really want me to take it any further.’

  Molly’s eyes were full of tears, her voice mangled by fury as she said, ‘Yes, I do. I want you to tell the police and make her go, because she’s got no right being here. She doesn’t belong with us. She belongs over there in those camps. She’s just in the way here …’

  Attempting to cut off the tirade, Katie said, ‘Sweetheart, listen …’

  ‘No! You listen,’ Molly shouted. ‘I hate her being here, and I hate you, because you always stick up for her. You don’t care about me any more. You just care about her!’

  ‘Molly that is not true. No-one matters more to me than you.’

  ‘Well you’ve got a funny way of showing it. You’re always talking to her and laughing and making fun of me. Well I’m sick of it! Do you hear me! I want her to go and if she doesn’t, then I’ll run away and you’ll never see me again.’

  Katie was on her feet, reaching for her. ‘Hey, come on, come on,’ she said, trying to hold her.

  ‘Don’t touch me! I’m not a baby …’

  Grabbing her hands and holding on firmly, Katie said, ‘Look at me. Come on now, I want to see your eyes …’

  ‘I don’t want to.’

  ‘Yes you do. Now come on.’

  It took a while, but finally, very reluctantly Molly began to lift her head. The instant their eyes met she looked away again.

  ‘Sweetheart,’ Katie said gently, ‘I think, in your heart, you already know the real reason Michelle’s here. So you know why she has to stay. She’s going to be there for you …’

  ‘Noooo!’ Molly cried, wrenching her hands free and blocking her ears. ‘I don’t want her here. I want her to go. You hate her too …’

  ‘That’s not true, and you know it. Yes, we’ve had our issues, but she’s my sister and I love her. More importantly, she loves you …’

  ‘She does not!’ Molly raged. ‘And I don’t want her to love me. I just want her to go away and never come back. I want it to be just us, the way it used to be …’

  ‘Oh Molly,’ Katie cried, ‘I wish it could be that way too, my darling, but it can’t happen now …’

  ‘Yes it can! It can!’

  ‘No, Molly, it can’t, and we both know why it can’t, so it’s time for us both to start facing it … Not only you, but me too …’

  ‘Noooo!’ Molly screamed again, and dragging herself free she charged for the door.

  ‘Molly, come back,’ Katie pleaded, go
ing after her. ‘Running away isn’t … Molly please,’ she cried, as Molly dashed outside.

  ‘Leave me alone!’ Molly shouted. ‘I don’t need you. I don’t need anyone.’

  Katie was crying by now, unable to hold back any longer. ‘Molly please don’t run away,’ she called after her. ‘It won’t solve anything, sweetheart. Molly, please,’ but Molly was already tearing down the lane, hands clamped to her ears, and unable to bear it, Katie broke down and sobbed.

  ‘It’s OK, it’s OK,’ Judy said, stepping out of the shadows. ‘I’ve got you. Come on, in we go. She’ll be all right. She’ll come back.’

  ‘Oh God, I’m making such a mess of it all,’ Katie gasped. ‘I tried to tell her, but she won’t listen.’

  ‘She will. Now you’ve opened it up, she won’t be able to deny it much longer.’

  Katie buried her face in her hands. ‘I’ve been so busy trying to fill my life with Tom’s story, and surrounding myself with people and things to blot it all out, that I haven’t really been thinking about her.’

  ‘Yes you have,’ Judy assured her. ‘She’s always come first.’

  Katie shook her head. ‘No, I’ve been avoiding it every bit as much as she has,’ she said, ‘in fact that’s why she’s finding it so hard now, because she’s taken a lead from me. Oh God, why didn’t I see this before? How have I let this happen? She’s so afraid and now she’s gone off … She doesn’t even have her phone.’

  ‘She’ll go to Allison’s, you know that,’ Judy said.

  ‘I should go round there. She’ll hate me for it, but we can’t leave things like this.’

  ‘Give her a bit of time,’ Judy advised. ‘Let her talk to her friend, then call the house and ask to speak to her. She’ll probably be ready to come home by then.’

  Sighing heavily, Katie blew her nose and looked down at Trotty who was eyeing her with deep concern. ‘They worry me, those friends of hers,’ she said, lifting the dog on to her lap. ‘I wish I knew more about them. I should have insisted on meeting them, but I haven’t because I’m afraid Molly’s ashamed of the way I look.’