Shafted (Devil's Blaze MC Book 4)
Page 24
The End.
Turn the page to read a bonus chapter featuring Beast…the main character in my next book:
Learning to Breathe.
Beast
I’m rubbing my hand under my neck. The scarred skin underneath is itching today. After all this time you would think that would stop, especially since the areas I’m burned the most are pretty much dead and little to no feeling is there. Cauterized. Burned and sealed closed. That’s me. That’s me to a fucking tee. I stare into the mirror. I used to have dark blonde hair, but after the burns they shaved my hair and when it came back, it’s more deep brown. It looks like a damned jungle now. I can’t remember the last time I had it cut and brushing it hasn’t been on my fucking mind much. Showers that last over four minutes are rare. Get in. Get out. I don’t want to see my body. See, touch or feel.
I’ve spent my whole life being unafraid, but since that one night when I lost everything I’ve been nothing but a fucking coward. The beard, the hair, the ink I keep adding over my body to hide the burns, all of it is a way to hide. Nothing helps. I thought once, I could live among my brothers in this tight circle and learn to be normal. The incident with Lucy is proof that it won’t happen. The men liked to joke, thinking I was sweet on her. Maybe I was. She seemed the complete opposite of Jan. Why I thought she could see beyond what is now staring back at me is beyond me. That moment was a reminder. A reminder of what I am.
A monster.
And monsters do much better on their own. I haven’t worn my club cut in a month. I wanted to make sure Bree was settled and the club was out of danger. Shaft will do good as the new President of the Chrome Saints and the bond with him and Skull will make things more secure for everyone. My debt to the brothers is done. It’s been done for a long time. Personal loyalty kept me here. I’ve been here too fucking long.
“You’re leaving,” Skull says from my door. I jerk my gaze from the man in the mirror to the man who has been family. The man it hurts me to look at. The man whose war cost me the only thing I ever cared about.
“I’m leaving.”
“This is your home, hermano.”
“It’s not.” I want him to leave. I need him to be gone. I’ve kept everything hid from him, from everyone. But the temptation is there to kill him. To choke the life from this man. Would it make me feel better? Could anything?
“Lo entiendo,” he says, leaning against the door. That’s almost more than I can take. He understands? How the fuck could he understand? He understands nothing.
“You don’t. Pray you never will. I’ll be gone in the morning,” I tell him and the anger bleeds through. I know he can hear it. Maybe he can even feel it. It’s vibrating inside of me.
“We want you to stay. We’re your family.”
I don’t answer that. He’s not family. He’s the reason I have no family.
“Beast…”
“You wake up every morning and see your children. You hold them, you touch them, you plan your days with them. I wake up every morning to nothing. I see you with your family. Torch with his and I hate you. I. Hate. You.”
Can’t get any plainer than that. Maybe he will understand now. When he was in war with his wife’s family, they lashed out and their bomb robbed my child of life. My beautiful Annabelle is just a memory now. A memory that haunts me. A memory that cuts me from the inside out with every breath I take. The scars on my body are a reminder. A reminder of what I lost. A reminder that I failed. I didn’t rescue her from the burning car. A reminder that I’m a monster…
“Where are you going?” Skull asks, resigned. Yeah. He gets it…finally.
“Don’t know. Don’t care.” Just fucking away.
“The club owns property…”
“I’m not part of the club.” Not anymore.
It’s ten acres on top of Whittler’s Mountain in North Carolina. There’s no house there, but there is a barn at the base of mountain with a loft that could work to stay in. You could…”
“I’m not part of the club,” I repeat, no matter how appealing it sounds. Ten acres would be enough to hide in. To let the animal that is devouring me find quiet.
“It would be yours free. The club would have no claim to it.”
I turn to look at him, wondering what the catch is. There’s something, because I can tell by his voice and the way he’s looking at me, there’s something he’s not saying.
“What?” I ask, waiting.
“Pistol’s sister…”
“No.”
“She lives…close to there.”
“Not my problem.”
“Si. But you could satisfy my curiosity and make sure she’s there.”
“Why? I don’t give a damn. Not sure why you do either.”
“Not sure why I do to be honest, hermano. But if you satisfy the wanderings of an old man, then I’ll give you the land. Free and outright,” Skull says and the promise of that alone is enough to make me stop. Ten acres. Privacy. Alone.
“If I go. I’m not reporting in. I’ll take a picture and tell you if she’s breathing. That’s it, and no one bothers me. I move to that mountain I shoot first and never ask questions, I don’t care what cut they are or aren’t wearing.”
My voice cracks. Another reminder. The burns bothered my vocal chords, the burns on my neck run deep. This is why I don’t talk. One of the reasons why. Skull is watching me and I don’t know what he’s looking for, but he finally nods his head in agreement. He finally leaves and I’m left standing in the room again with nothing but my mirror to stare back at me.
I punch my fist into it, knocking it from the wall. I watch it fall landing among pieces of shattered glass. It didn’t make me feel any better but the blood on my fist at least calms me. Then I walk out the door, leaving my cut behind. Leaving everything and everyone behind.
Just…leaving.
Coming Soon by Jordan Marie
Learning to Breathe
Happy Trail Lucas Brothers Series
The Right Kind of Wrong
Also by Jordan Marie
Savage Brother MC
Breaking Dragon
Saving Dancer
Loving Nicole
Claiming Crusher
Trusting Bull
Devil’s Blaze MC **
Captured
Burned
Released
Shafted
Titles Continued
The Perfect Stroke
Raging Heart On
Works Written Under the Pen Name
Baylee Rose
Unlawful Seizure
Unjustified Demands
** Only series available on all markets at this time.
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