So Good

by Kayla Carson

  “Can I help you?” I asked.

  “Yeah.. uh is Evie around?” The man said, glancing around the hallway, and checking the number on the doors around him.

  “She should be here any minute, are you a friend of hers?”

  “We have class together. We were supposed to be studying tonight.”

  “Must have got your wires crossed pal, Evie and I have plans tonight.” I said, with a cocky edge in my voice, that I wasn't used to using.

  Before he could respond, Evie appeared beside him. The smile she was sporting instantly grew wider when her eyes caught mine, and I couldn't help but do the same. She dropped her bags in the hallway, and ran into my waiting arms peppering my face with kisses. I laughed, squeezing her tight against me. “Miss me Hermosa.” I whispered in her ear.

  “So much!” She gushed, kissing me one more time before turning to face her guest. “I'm sorry Antonio. Jake just got back from Iraq, like just now, today, and we really need to catch up. Rain check?” She asked innocently.

  “Of course.” He said, adjusting the strap on his bag. “You'll call me?”

  “Promise.” She smiled sweetly, shutting the door, as he turned to leave. “Now. Where were we?” She teased, raising her eyebrows up and down suggestively.

  “We were about to eat dinner.” I joked back. “Follow me.”

  I led her into the small eat in kitchen, where the table was set for two. I couldn't find any tall candles, but I did come across a few scented candles scattered throughout the house. I pulled a chair out for her, and motioned for her to sit. She smiled, curtseying before she took it, and sending herself into a fit of giggles. “What is all this?” She asked between laughter.

  “I wanted to do something nice for you.” I said, pretending to feel hurt from her laughter. “The least you could do is say thank you.”

  “Jake, I-” She started, her laughter quickly dissipating.

  “Sit down, and eat Evie.” I said, grabbing a bread stick from the basket and tossing it at her.

  “Jacob Daniel Cruz!” She squealed, reaching for a bread stick of her own.

  Before I knew it, we were in a full on bread stick war, and when we'd emptied the basket, we reached for the salad. Grape tomatoes, shredded lettuce, and croutons, flew across the kitchen, and bounced off the cupboards. Evie's curly hair was full of bacon bits, and I couldn't control my laughter. When she reached for the pot of Alfredo, I held my hands up in surrender. “Evie, wait. Let's be reasonable.” I said.

  The gleam in her eye, had me smirking, and I knew if I didn't think fast, I'd be cleaning her apartment for the entire weekend. I reached for the pot with one hand, and her with the other, simultaneously placing the pot back on the stove, and her in my arms. Her breath caught in her throat, when my lips brushed hers. “I made my mother's recipe.” I whispered.

  “Oh?” She whispered back, her breath against my cheek. “I suppose we should eat then, while it's still warm.”

  “Thank you Percy Spencer.” I said, scooping her up into a princess hold.

  “Who?” She asked with a smile, looping her arms around my neck.

  “The genius who invented the microwave.” I winked, stepping over the mess that littered the kitchen floor, and carrying her into her bedroom.

  “I'm not even going to ask how you know that.” She sighed, laying her head on my chest. “I'm just glad you're home.”

  “Me too Hermosa.”

  We spent the next few hours in a heap of tangled blankets, and limbs. The grumbling of our stomachs, the only thing capable of tearing us away from each other. I cleaned up the mess in the kitchen, while Evie showered, and when she finished she joined me at the table, wearing nothing but the tee shirt I'd vacated. “I'm starving.” She said, reaching for her fork, and bringing it to her lips. “Mmm.” She moaned, savoring the bite.

  “You like it?” I asked, taking a bite of my own.

  “It's delicious.” She smiled. “Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “Being here. I know you need to see Zoe tomorrow, but I really missed you.”

  I reached for her hand across the table, and ran my thumb over hers. “I love you Evie, there's no where else I'd rather be right now.”

  “Except for there.” She said sadly, slowly pulling her hand away from mine.

  “Evie -”

  “No. I get it. I do. It's your passion. It makes you happy. I just wonder if it's the only thing that ever will.”

  “I'm happy when I'm with you.” I tried to reassure her, but I wasn't sure what she wanted to hear. Was she asking for some kind of commitment? Or did she genuinely think the army was the only thing that would ever complete me?

  “Forget I said anything.” She smiled. “Let's enjoy the rest of our evening. I have to share you with your sister tomorrow.” She teased.

  I smiled back, and we spent the rest of our night in easy conversation. She showed me some of her course work, and I told her about basic training. I even told her I was interested in the special ops unit. The look in her eyes told me she was terrified at the thought, but she hid it well. We made love again that night, and when I woke up the next morning, she was already gone. I knew she had class, but not having her here with me had me wishing that she was. Maybe I was an idiot to think that we could have this kind of relationship. I was worried about her feelings, but the more time I spent with Evie Perez, the more I started to feel for her. My heart, and my mind were suddenly in battle, and either way I looked at it; it felt like the losing kind.

  Chapter 9 Now

  I felt like one of those cartoon characters. You know when a pretty girl walks in the room, and their jaws literally drop, and hit the floor? That was me. That was my expression. Evie was starring at me, tears streaming down her face, and all I could do was stare back, mouth agape. I needed air. I stood slowly, and when she made to join me, I held up my hand, stopping her. “I just. I need a minute.” I stammered, excusing myself, and stepping outside.

  The morning air did nothing to sooth me, in fact I suddenly felt worse. The humid, California air choking the life out of me. Before I could turn to go back inside, I felt her hand on my shoulder. I knew it was her, I always knew. “Evie-” I started.

  “I'm so sorry Jake.” She sobbed, interrupting me. “I know I should have told you. I should have been honest with you from the start, but I was scared.”

  “Scared of what?” I asked, some of the anger returning. “Me?”

  “No. Of course not.” She said softly. “I knew you'd do the right thing, but it would have been for all the wrong reasons.”

  “You couldn't possibly have known that.” I snapped. “I lost my parents Evie! What made you think I'd want my son growing up without his?!”

  “You never loved me like I loved you Jake!” She yelled back, tears streaming down her face. “I was just a friend who you occasionally fucked! That's all I was ever going to be to you! My baby deserved more, he deserved a family!”

  “If that's what you think, if that's how you remember things, then you are seriously fucked up!” I said angrily, then lowering my voice I added. “You were the only woman I ever gave a damn about, and you repaid me by keeping my son from me.”

  “You would have left the army, and you would have married me. We would have been a family, but it wouldn't have been real. It wouldn't have made you happy. The army is your life Jake! I couldn't ask you to give up your life, for a mediocre life with me.”

  “That wasn't your decision to make! You never gave me a say in the matter.”

  “I know, and for that, I truly am sorry.”

  “Why now? Why tell me now?”

  “You deserved to know the truth, and I wanted to tell you in person. I was hoping, I don't know, that maybe we could be friends again. At least for Gabriel's sake.”

  “Gabriel.” I said with astonishment, realization hitting me. “You named him after my father?”

  “I did.”

  I shook my head in disbelief, rubbing m
y hands over my face. “Does he know about me?” I asked, my eyes meeting hers.

  “Yes. He knows you're his Daddy, I've shown him pictures.” She smiled, at the thought.

  “What have you told him?” I asked, a tear escaping from my own eye. “When can I see him?”

  “Jake.” Evie started. “I'm not sure if. I mean. Maybe it's best if we-”

  “If we what Evie? Pretend you never told me? Act like you walking out of my life and hiding a baby is perfectly sane?!” I snapped.

  “I need to know that if I do this. If I let you meet him. That you're willing to be in his life. This is a forever kind of commitment. Once I let you into his life, you have to stay there.”

  “I thought I knew you so much better than this. How could you even ask me that kind of question? He's my son Evie.”

  “Tomorrow. I'll meet you here at noon for lunch.” She said, with her head cast down, and before I could answer, she spun on her heel and walked away.

  I could have stopped her. Maybe I should have, but instead, I walked in the opposite direction. I walked until I ended up on the beach, and I kicked my shoes off and headed towards the water. I sat down in the sand, letting the waves crash over my feet and ankles. I wanted to call Wes, to tell him about everything that had just happened, but he was on his honeymoon. I scrolled through my cell absent-mindedly, and when my eyes locked on Cole's name, I hit send.

  A half hour later, he showed up with a six pack, and plopped down beside me. Cracking one open, he passed it to me before opening one of his own. We sat there in silence, drinking our beers, and starring out across the ocean. When I'd finished mine, Cole passed me another. I wasn't the kind of man who talked about his feelings, but I needed to tell someone. “I have a son.” I said, lifting my can to my lips. It was the first time I'd said that sentence out loud and it felt foreign on my tongue.

  “Well, that's interesting.” Cole replied, downing his second beer. “Is that why you called? To talk about your feelings and shit?” He teased, nudging my arm with his elbow.

  “Something like that.” I laughed back.

  “I'm never having kids. They're always smelly, and sticky, and the fact that they can't take care of themselves from the get go is a real deal breaker. I don't mind being cool uncle Cole, but I'm returning the little shits when the day's over. So who's the lucky girl?”

  I shook my head, trying to hide my grin. The one thing that you could always count on with Cole, was his honesty. He was a cocky little shit, but he always told it like it was. “Evie.”

  “No shit! The girl you gave your balls to when you were a teenager? When did that happen?”

  “Two years ago apparently. At least, that's how old Gabriel is.”

  “Wait. She lied to you for years, and then had the balls to name the kid after your dead Father!”

  “That pretty much sums it up.”

  “Damn.” He sighed, cracking open his last beer.

  “Yeah.” I agreed, mirroring his action.

  After Cole left, I made my own trip to the liquor store. I needed something stronger. I bought a bottle of Jack Daniels, and headed for home. Not that it felt like much of a home anymore. I honestly don't know why I kept my parent's house. Zoe had moved out, and it sat empty most of the time.

  I pulled my truck into the garage, and headed inside, pulling down a glass from the cupboard. I filled it almost to the brim, and took a seat at the dining room table. I sat, in the dark, starring out the french doors at the pool. I felt the burn of the liquor as it traveled down my throat and warmed my stomach. It was a welcome feeling, a comforting feeling, and one that I realized I'd come to miss while I was away.

  I finished the first glass in record time, and got up to grab my bottle off the counter. I filled the cup again, and again, losing count after six. I was finally starting to feel better, that or I was too numb from the alcohol. Whatever the reason was, I was grateful. I had finally, for the moment, stopped thinking about Evie. I stood, wanting to go upstairs to my bedroom but I was so dizzy, I nearly fell over.

  I managed to catch myself on the stair railing, and use it to pull myself up. I clumsily made my way to my bedroom, practically collapsing on my bed when I reached it. I laughed at myself for getting so drunk, and crawled beneath the covers without removing my clothes. I needed to sleep. Maybe by the time the morning sun came crashing through my window, my head would be clearer. I never should have spoken to Evie the way that I did, but I was hurting, and she had to know that. I could fix it though. Tomorrow. Everything would be better tomorrow.

  Chapter 10 Then

  It was my first time coming home in a year. Evie and talked, and since she had a lot of studying to get in I decided to stay at my parents place, or my place rather. Even though they had been gone for five years, I still had a hard time picturing their things as mine. I sold both of their cars last year, and I replaced them with a simple sedan for Zoe. She kept the car a month, before a skype session revealed the car she really wanted, a 1967 Chevelle. At first I was furious, but like my father, I let Zoe's joy rope me in. It wasn't practical, but it was the first thing she had that felt like her own, and I understood the need to feel like your own person.

  Zoe's car was gone, so I assumed she was at a friends. I tossed my bag onto the dining room table, and rounded the corner in search of the television remote. I plopped down onto the couch, and turned on the local news. I always liked to catch up first thing when I got back into town. Zoe kept me informed for the most part, but there was something comforting in knowing that life just kept going while you were away.

  I was only home for half an hour before the doorbell rang. I thought about ignoring it, but when the knocks persisted, I gave in. I checked the peep hole, and the eyes I found starring back at mine belonged to a very familiar face. I smiled briefly, changing my expression as I opened the door. “Evie.” I said, in a questioning tone. “I thought you were busy?”

  “Shut up.” She said, wrapping her arms around my neck, and squeezing me tight. “I missed you.”

  I wrapped my arms around her, relishing in the scent of her hair, and the perfume on her skin. “I missed you too Hermosa.” I whispered.

  “I brought movies!” She said excitedly, after breaking our intimate hug. “Everything that you've missed while being away.” She added, while stepping around me and placing a stack of ten or so DVDs on the coffee table. “I hope you're up for a marathon.”

  “I'm sure I can be persuaded.” I said, raising my brows suggestively.

  “Jake.” She sighed. “I was hoping we could actually spend some time together this weekend.”

  “We'll spend lots of time together Hermosa, I promise.” I winked, sitting down on the couch, and patting the space beside me.

  “Unbelievable.” She said, rolling her eyes, and turning towards the door.

  “Hey, wait!” I called out standing to stop her, my hand gripping her lower arm. “What's going on?”

  “We used to be friends Jake, and then, whatever this is started.” She said bitterly. “Is it so wrong that I want to spend time with my friend right now? To talk to you as my best friend, and not the guy I'm sleeping with?”

  “Come on.” I said softly, tugging her arm, and leading her back to the couch. We sat down, side by side, my hand covering hers. “Talk to me.” I urged. “Please.”

  “Med school is running me ragged Jake. I don't know, maybe I made the wrong decision. Maybe, I'm just not cut out to be a doctor.”

  “That's ridiculous. Being a pediatrician has been your dream since you were ten years old, and you have never been one to back down. What's really going on?”

  “I'm a scholarship kid Jake.” She said, sounding defeated. “In a class full of legacy kids. Everyone expects so much from them, that when I actually do better than them, I don't even get recognized. I just, I thought college, and the real world, would be different.”

  “How are your grades?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

  “Straig
ht A's.” She smiled weakly.

  “Exactly. This is what you were born to do Evie Perez, not go pop one of those movies in, and I'll make the popcorn.”

  “Ok.” She agreed, grabbing the first movie on the stack, and putting it in the DVD player.

  We sat together, in semi silence watching a romantic comedy. I couldn't tell you the name of it because I was too busy watching Evie. The way she'd crinkle her nose at a scene she disliked, or the way she'd giggle when she felt embarrassed. I've seen every inch of her, but she still blushed during the sex scenes, which only made me smile more. There was an innocence about her, and the more time I spent with her in our new found relationship, the more I grew to look forward to it.

  Even though she had seen, and lived her own darkness, it was as if she was untouched by the demons that lived there. She had somehow come out unscathed, her beauty, and intelligence, stronger than their pull. I envied her for that.

  The movie had just about finished, when Zoe walked through the front door. I glanced at the clock, and realized it was nearly midnight. She was an adult, but she was still my little sister. I cleared my throat, catching both girl's attention. “Where have you been?” I asked, with an accusatory tone.

  “Out.” She snapped, rolling her eyes. “I'm almost twenty years old Jake, and you aren't my father.”

  “Doesn't mean I can't worry about you.” I said, with concern.

  “I'm fine.” She sighed, brushing past us, and into the kitchen.

  “Leave her alone Jake.” Evie said, resting her head on my shoulder.

  I kissed her forehead, enticing a smile. “What are we watching next?” I asked, on a long blissful sigh.

  She stood, stretching her arms above her head, before disappearing into the kitchen. I sat, and waited, for a few minutes, but when she didn't return, I got up to join her. I found, she and Zoe sitting at the dining room table sharing a bag of Twizzlers. I laughed, at the two of them twirling their licorice around and laughing like young teenagers.