I gathered a basket full of oregano and tied it in bunches to hang from the beams in the kitchen. Then I did parsley and sage the same way. The chives don’t dry well in that manner, so I got the dehydrator out of the shed and plugged it in. The light oniony scent quickly filled the room so I moved it onto the deck. I lined up several glass jars on the counter to hold the herbs once they dried.
I finished washing and sorting out the remaining fish. A half tub full of the larger ones was ready for the smokehouse, and it looked like enough for a dinner with one more batch in the canner. I was starting to feel fatigued, and there was still so much to do.
I started the dough for the pizza and set it to rise.
The little Bobcat pistol lay on the table, magazine to the side, empty of shells. I took a soft cloth and wiped it down with gun oil. It glistened in the sunlight shifting through the window, a light breeze coming through the opened screen ruffled the papers it sat on.
* * *
I walked across the road to finalize the party plans with Amanda and was met at the bottom of the porch steps by an energetic Emilee.
“Nahna, Dad did the funniest thing this morning,” Emilee said. “He made a litter box for Chivas on the porch! Instead of sand, he filled it with grass. He dug up some of the lawn. Good thing my Mom isn’t here, she’d have a fit if she saw that!” she giggled.
“He made a litter box for the dog? This I need to see.” I followed Emi up the stairs where I saw a two foot by four foot box that looked about eight inches deep, filled with a layer of freshly harvested chunks of lawn, and it dawned on me how useful that would be.
“I think your dad is a very smart man, Emi. What a clever solution! Chivas will need a place to go, you know, pee, and she’s still too weak to go down the steps. Besides, once we all have to stay inside, it will be the only place she can pee.”
I gave her a hug. “Oh, and happy birthday. You’re now twelve years old, almost a teenager,” I said, realizing how much time had gone by since I had been in Florida to witness her birth.
“Thank you, Nahna,” she said quietly. “I know it can’t be special, not like other birthdays, because of what’s coming.” Emi shrugged her little shoulders.
“We will make it as special as we can for you,” I promised her. “How would you like pizza for dinner tonight?”
“Yay! I love pizza! Can we have pepperoni on it?” Emi was all smiles now, anticipating a special dinner in her honor.
“I think I still have some left,” I assured her, thinking of the venison pepperoni I had made.
I saw my two sons making their way across the creek carrying what looked like a deer between them, so I hurried out to greet them and offer some help.
They had cut down a small tree and after tying the deer’s legs together, ran the poles between the feet and then hoisted it across their shoulders. They were carrying a great deal of weight like that.
With his ribs still not completely healed from the altercation a month ago, Eric was soon struggling as he tried coming up the steep hill. They had just stopped to set down the carcass when I met up with them, at which point I took over for Eric to finish bringing the fresh meat up the incline. We got the deer hung in the barn and I was thankful they had already gutted the animal.
“That didn’t take long! This is great,” I said, beaming at my two hunters as they made short work of skinning the animal.
“I’m just sorry we only got one, Mom. We’ll go out again another time,” Eric assured me.
* * *
Everyone gathered in the kitchen around six o’clock for dinner. Everyone except John, and his absence was a glaring reminder of the approaching storm. Eric had told Amanda, Emilee and Jacob that Grandpa John had gone on a trip far away and might be gone for a long time.
“I like Grandpa John. Did he die, Nahna?” Jacob asked in the innocence of an autistic child.
“Oh, no, Jacob, he didn’t die! He just had to go see someone who lives a long way away. He said he would be back, but we don’t know when.” I tried to reassure my grandson. Maybe I was trying to reassure myself. It didn’t work on me - I hope it worked on everyone else.
After dinner I brought out a plateful of muffins I had made earlier and put a single candle in the middle one and we all sang happy birthday to our beaming and budding young lady.
“I have a present for you, Emi,” I announced. I handed her a box wrapped in Christmas paper, which made her laugh.
Her eyes got very wide and I thought she was going to burst at the seams when she saw the little gun.
“Oh, Nahna, my very own gun …,” she said breathlessly. “It’s so small, is it real?”
“Very definitely real, but you will need lessons from your dad before you’re allowed to shoot it, okay?”
She nodded vigorously, then her Uncle Jason gave her a box of ammo, and Eric gave his daughter the holster, attached to one of her own belts, which pleased her greatly. Amanda presented her with a necklace, a reminder that she was still a girl. Jacob being Jacob surprised us all by giving Emi a hand drawn birthday card. He gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek, and then went to read one of his new books.
* * *
After our great family night, we got back to business.
“We still need to get the fish smoking and I have another batch of fish for the canner,” I commented. “This needs to be done tonight. I know we’re putting in long hours and I, for one, am feeling the strain in the way of fatigue.”
“We are too, Mom. I think that’s why I had such a hard time getting up the hill,” Eric said.
“Well, we’re not done yet. In another couple of days we will have a deer to butcher and that might mean pulling an all-nighter,” I warned them. “Fatigue can do strange things, so we need one person to keep us on track. Amanda, while the three of us are cutting and canning meat, can you be the one to watch the kids, fix our meals, and keep us focused?”
She looked doubtful. “Sure. I guess so.”
“You will be the one adult that can sleep. We might be able to figure out a shift of sorts, once these two understand the meat canning process,” I said, “but none of us can get much more than a catnap until the meat is done. We just can’t risk losing it.”
Before everyone left for the night, I reminded them that this was the last day of grid power for three days, and to all take showers, baths and to do laundry.
I settled down to watch some news after I took my shower. The final load of laundry tumbled in the dryer.
“…the reports that have filtered in, we now know that the 9.6 earthquake and the subsequent volcanic eruptions in Yellowstone were felt as far east as Washington, D.C. and as far north as areas in Ontario, Canada.
“No reports yet on how far the eruption of the Valles Caldera in New Mexico was felt. The Valles Caldera, centered in the Jemes Mountains, has been dormant for millions of years and was considered to be a non-threat. The eruption this morning is believed to have been triggered by the Yellowstone eruptions. Government officials are suggesting caution when venturing outdoors, and recommend that those with breathing disorders remain indoors until the possible ash cloud passes.
“On a brighter note, the Detroit Tigers take on the Yankees tomorrow in a home game...”
I turned the TV off. How could they discuss baseball at a time like this? I shook my head in disbelief. Caution when venturing outdoors?? That was unbelievable. People were going to die. Maybe a lot of people.
CHAPTER 29
July 20
It looked like fog, hanging quiet and heavy in the tops of the trees; a slowly moving, shifting mass. It hung there, silently obscuring the morning sun. I wasn’t really quite sure if it had begun or not. It wasn’t what I had expected, but then, what did I expect? I called the boys on the FRS radio to let them know that I thought it had started.
The ash cloud settled lower in the branches, filtering more and more of the sunlight until it touched the ground and the shroud was complete. Fine ash and pumice, li
ke motes of dust, gathered on the pavement, only much more deadly than the benign dust it mimicked. A light breeze sprung up and quickly became a brisk wind that lashed at the growing piles of death. The wind pushed first one way and then another, scattering the ash in ever moving tendrils that resembled snakes darting in a confused dance back and forth across the pavement. The wind picked up a handful and swirled it tornado-like down the road, dropping it in another drift.
I was watching the growing gloom in abstract fascination from within the safety of the house when I saw Mark pulling into the driveway across the road late in the afternoon. It was a bad time to make a house call on a dog. I could see he was wearing a mask of some sort though.
Forty-some minutes later I heard knocking on the glass door.
“Mark,” I said through the glass, “come around to the greenhouse so you can shake the ash off.” He nodded, and I moved through the house to let him in the back way. The ash had been falling for over six hours now.
He stepped into the greenhouse entrance Jason had made to enclose the hand pump on the well. Only then did he remove his hooded jacket then his face mask and goggles, shaking the ash off. I opened the door that led into the warm and humid growing room.
“Mark, you’ve picked a bad day to come visiting,” I commented, as I hung his jacket on a shaker-peg.
“Allexa, we need to talk,” he replied quite ominously.
I poured two cups of coffee and we sat at the kitchen table.
“Why are you out and about, Mark? You of all people know how dangerous this first wave of ash might be! We all love Chivas and appreciate your concern for her, but a house call for a dog is not worth risking your life.”
He smiled at me and sipped his coffee. “That’s just like you, to think of someone else first.” Mark set his cup down. “I didn’t come to see the dog, I came to see you.”
“I’m not sick. And I haven’t injured myself again either. So why are you really here?” I sat back, crossing my arms over my chest.
“John came to see me yesterday morning. Damn early I must add!”
“And?”
“And he told me about the last visit the two of you had in town, with Pastor Carolyn. John thought I should know so I could watch the town people and be ready. He believed, believes, in the facts you presented to the town, and it made him angry that they were just going to ignore your warnings. I must tell you that is one man I do not want angry at me!” Mark chuckled.
“Yes, I was very disturbed by their attitude. Fortunately, I don’t think everyone thinks that way.”
“Well, too many of them do… or did.” Mark frowned.
“What do you mean ‘did’?” I asked, my alarms ringing, and my heartbeat picking up. “Have some of them come back around?” I asked hopefully.
Mark rubbed his hands over his face. “Do you have anything stronger than coffee?” he asked me.
“What’s your choice? I have a small variety of alcohol, and not much of that,” my breathing was short. I wanted to hear what he had to say, although he needed time and perhaps fortification.
“Bourbon?”
I retrieved the bottle from the back pantry and poured him two fingers in a short glass. He took a sip, then with eyes closed tossed the rest back and set the glass down.
“By any chance do you have some ice?” he asked, gasping from the alcohol’s impact.
It was only the first day of the three-day shut off from power. I took a bowl from the silent freezer and dropped three ice cubes in his glass. After he poured more bourbon over the ice, he went on. “Allex, it was horrifying to watch, and I felt so helpless. Within a half hour of the ash cloud’s appearance this morning, entire families were walking to or from the church singing hymns. It didn’t take long, and the youngest grabbed his throat and screamed. His mother dropped to his side and then crumpled herself. I couldn’t even get near them. Then others screamed and fell to the ground. They dropped like flies, Allex! I know it must have been agonizing, and at least it was quick. They just couldn’t breathe. The ash lacerated their lungs with a single intake. The rest couldn’t get inside fast enough. If they had breathed outside, they were already doomed.” Mark stared at his drink.
“How many, Mark?” I asked in a hushed voice. This had to be incredibly hard on a man dedicated to healing.
“At least twenty…” He took a swallow of the amber liquid sloshing around in his glass, his hands trembling.
Twenty? My God, there were only maybe thirty left in the whole town! I was beyond astonished they could be so reckless, so stupid.
“That was today, this morning.” Mark gathered his thoughts and his composure. “When John stopped by yesterday, he also told me what he was doing, where he was going. I tried to talk him out of it, Allex, but he was very insistent. He also asked me to do something for him,” he took another sip from his drink, stalling.
“He said he’d be back in a week … he isn’t coming back at all, is he?” I blurted out.
“No, he isn’t. At least it’s very doubtful,” Mark confessed. “He said he has to try to reach his daughter. He thinks he will be stopped at some point and not be able to make it back here. There is also a strong chance he will be killed along the way.”
I breathed in gulps, keeping my feelings silent by wrapping my heart in a cool, dark blanket.
“He told me that he asked you to marry him,” Mark stated, “and that you said no. He didn’t tell you this, but he thinks your turning him down has something to do with me, Allex. He knows that I have… feelings for you, and that you might return those feelings, even if you deny it now. So he asked me, made me promise, that if and when the clouds got here, that I would come to you, to keep you company during the bad times that are sure to be ahead of us.”
“He wants you to live here? Mark, moving about is going to be extremely difficult. If you stay here, how can you help the town, the people?” I pressed, even though I was wrought with confusion that John would just pass me over to another man.
“Allex, there’s no one left to help! Those few that didn’t succumb to this first wave are hunkered down and playing it safe. They don’t need me right now. John felt that you might,” Mark searched my face. “Do you? Will you?”
“I … I don’t know, Mark,” I told him honestly. “I do know you can’t go back out in this, not yet anyway.”
I made up the futon couch for Mark, and in the deepening summer twilight, I sought solace in a dreamless sleep.
JOURNAL ENTRY: July 21
My mind adjusted quickly when I couldn’t see the red numbers of the digital clock on my nightstand. The grid power is out, so coffee will have to be made manually.
The air temp is still mild and not yet affected by the cloud that is hovering around us.
* * *
I slipped on a t-shirt and flannel pants and made my way to the kitchen.
I boiled some water and pulled out the French press, thinking about John, wondering where he was now. Those thoughts didn’t last long when Mark came into the kitchen on his way to the bathroom. Burgundy and gray checked lounging pants hung low on his narrow hips, emphasizing his muscular and bare chest; a chest sprinkled with dark, curly hair that trailed down over a flat abdomen, forming a V that disappeared below the waistband.
I couldn’t help but stare. He was a very good looking man. When I realized he had stopped moving, my eyes flashed up to his smiling face.
“Good morning, Allex,” Mark grinned, and moved past me.
If the heat I felt was any indication over my embarrassment, my face must be flushed bright crimson.
“Good morning,” I mumbled, and went back to fixing coffee with shaky hands. The desire I had felt shocked me.
* * *
“We need some ground rules, Mark,” I said as we sat at the table, coffee in hand and muffins in the center of the distance between us.
“Do we?” he asked, another grin forming on his perfect lips. He took a bite of a blueberry muffin. “These are ve
ry good, Allex.”
“Yes, we do, and the first rule is you can’t walk around half naked. Please put a shirt on.”
He chuckled and went into the other room, returning while pulling a gray t-shirt over his head.
“That better?”
“Yes, thank you.” I said, looking away from his intense blue eyes. When had they gotten so dark? “I believe in being honest, Mark, so I’m going to admit that I find you very attractive,” I held up my hand as he tried to interrupt, “however, you can’t expect me just to switch my affections from John to you because he might not be coming back. He’s been gone less than three days!”
“You’re absolutely right, Allex. It was unfair of me to be so obvious,” Mark admitted. “I promise to control myself. When you come to me, it will be because you want to.”
We fell into an uneasy silence as I poured more coffee.
“The muffins really are very good. John said you’re an incredible cook,” Mark said, moving on to a safer subject.
“Thank you. I tried to bake ahead knowing the power would be out for a few days. The stove is gas, and can be used with just a match, however, the oven needs electricity to stay on,” I informed him, babbling. “During the cooler months it isn’t an issue, since our... my... heat comes from that cook stove over there.” I pointed to my wood burner, stumbling over my words.
Mark glanced over his shoulder. “Why don’t you use it now?”
“It would make it too hot in here. However, it might be a good time to try the summer kitchen out. That will be my project for the day.” I smiled at his confusion. “You passed the other cook stove when you came into the greenhouse,” I said, relaxing some as I explained one of the functions of my homestead. “Jason designed the greenhouse to have multiple functions. That cook stove burns wood too, and will only heat up that room not the house, plus the plants love the heat. If it gets too hot, it can be vented. During the cold months, it will add the needed heat to supplement the passive solar. I suppose I could run the generator to use the gas oven, but I’m looking forward to trying the summer kitchen out.”
The Journal: Ash Fall Page 22