I’ve been spending some time with your mom. She’s wasn’t settling in with her job and apparently, her boss was an ass, so Noah went in and dealt with him while Henley and I got her a new job in a clothing store. She seems much happier now. She’s doing really well. You should be proud of her. She tells me every day how much she misses you. You probably should have told her about the tropical beach thing too!
I miss you. These past five months have been driving me crazy but every day that passes means one less day until I get to see you again…whenever that might be.
I love you so much.
Do unspeakable things to yourself tonight while you think about me, and I promise, I’ll do the same!
Tully
Xxx
PS I’m getting cushion covers made with your drawing on them to replace all the ones in my apartment. Maybe I’ll get some pillowcases and some tanks made up too!!
Six and a Half Months Deployed
Tullz,
I’m fucking coming home, baby!!!!!!!
I don’t know when you’re going to get this letter. It could be days or it could be weeks, but just know, that when I get home, I expect to find you as naked as the day you were born, ready and waiting for me. Hell, you better warm up my side of the bed because I have no intention of leaving it.
This is finally it, babe! I’m coming home and now it’s our time to shine. We’re going to make this happen. You and me; this is the start of the rest of our lives and I get to spend every day of forever showing you just how much you mean to me.
I’ve told you a million times before that you’re my world and that feeling hasn’t changed since the day I first fell in love with you.
I miss you and I can’t wait to see you.
I love you so fucking much that I don’t even care if you decorate your whole damn apartment with that stick figure drawing, as long as I have you in my arms, I’m a happy man.
I’ll see you soon,
Rivers.
Chapter 18
Tully
I stand in the middle of my kitchen, smiling like a fool as I read his words to me. He’s coming home. I can’t fucking believe it. It’s been the longest seven months of my life, but it’s nearly over.
The second he walks through my door, the rest of our lives can finally begin and I can’t fucking wait. Rivers is my guy and I’ve gone far too long without him. Don’t get me wrong, receiving his letters over the past seven months have been incredible, but it’s nothing compared to the real thing. Not even close.
Unable to stop myself, I read the letter again and then twice more just to make sure I read every single word correctly. His excitement in his words shines through and has me bubbling with joy.
The only downfall is that this is the military we’re talking about, meaning I have absolutely no way of knowing when he sent this letter, because the guy is incapable of writing the date at the top of the page, and I have absolutely no idea of knowing when he’s actually going to get home.
Rivers could have received the news he was going home weeks ago and he could nearly be here or it could still be another few weeks wait. Judging by our other letters, I’d say he probably sent this out nearly a month ago, but there’s no real way to be sure. Sometimes I’d be waiting only a few weeks before his letter would come and other times, it’d be nearly two months, so I won’t be getting my hopes up, not just yet.
I start looking around my apartment. I have so many little surprises for him and if he barges his way in here, I don’t want any of them to be ruined, though, he knows about my new cushion covers. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I first saw that drawing of a little stick figure getting himself off, but I don’t know why I was so surprised. That’s so typically Rivers that I should have been expecting it. Especially after the photo’s I sent to him.
I was nervous about sending them. I wasn’t sure if mail got looked at before being sent to the soldiers so it was definitely a risk, but I knew that once they landed in Rivers' hands, they were safe. There’s no way he would have let them out of his sight, even in the middle of a war zone. Protecting the people he loves has always been his goal and he’d die before betraying that or letting anyone down.
Me? I was different. In order to protect me, he needed to hurt me and that’s something we’ll both struggle with for the rest of our lives. Though ‘struggle’ might be the wrong word. I certainly struggled for the past four years but I’ve been learning to put it behind me. I understand his reasoning now and with that came forgiveness, and that forgiveness sure makes life a hell of a lot easier.
I go about my living room on a Thursday afternoon cleaning up after myself. It’s been a huge day with orders at the store, a check-up at the clinic, and then stopping by the store to pick up some fresh groceries for the new healthy diet I’ve been forcing myself to stay on for the last few months, and to be honest, it doesn’t suck. It’s just time consuming. Rather than calling for take out, I actually have to cook, which at first I hated, but I’ve been learning a lot of new tricks and Henley has been adamant about teaching me a thing or two. But let’s face it, it’ll be years before I can reach her skill level in the kitchen.
With the living room now in order and my feet beginning to ache after such a big day, I grab Rivers' letter off the kitchen counter and drop down onto my couch. I absolutely adore reading, but tonight, I’ll be content just reading his few paragraphs over and over again as no book could ever bring me more joy.
I squish myself into my stick figure cushion and pull the stick figure blanket over my lower half and get comfortable. I mean, my home is currently covered in Rivers' little horny stick figure man. I have mugs, a pajama set, blankets, and cushions. I even had one printed and framed up on my wall. I just hope Rivers doesn’t do the same with the picture I sent him.
The thought has a cheesy as fuck grin ripping across my face and I find my eyes dropping down to the paper to take it all in again.
I’m fucking coming home, baby!!!!!!!
Since the second I found his letter sitting in my mailbox, I’ve been kicking myself. Who knows how long it was sitting there? I haven’t checked my mailbox for three days, but I guess, seeing as though he’s not here with me right now, it really doesn’t matter. But I would have loved to be fawning over the letter for longer if I could.
His letters have been more than I could have imagined. When I wrote him that first letter, I was expecting a response of maybe three or four words, in true Rivers fashion, but he gave me so much more than that, and although I’ve missed him like never before, his letters were my saving grace that helped pull me through.
Screw Noah and Henley’s endless checking on me. that did nothing to help me get by. I mean, I guess that’s a little unfair. I love them both so much, but there’s a difference between coming to see me to spend time together and checking on me to make sure I haven’t turned into the crazy cat lady.
There’s a knock on my door that has me groaning.
Speaking of Noah being an overprotective asshat, that would be him showing up for his daily check-in. Without fail, I have seen my douchebag, twin brother every single day since Rivers got on that plane. Whether it’s here at home, at my store, while I’m visiting mom and dad, or hell, he even crashed my girls’ night with Henley and Aiden. It’s getting a bit much, but from this letter in my hand, it seems I won’t have to deal with it for much longer.
My eyes snap up to the massive clock on my wall. 8 pm. Right on time. That tells me Noah has just finished his shift and he’s popping in here for two seconds before going home to spend his night with his lovely wife.
I roll my eyes and set a scowl onto my face so he gets the full effect as he walks in. “Come in,” I groan, loud enough for him to catch the annoyance in my tone.
There’s an amused scoff on the other side of the door before I hear the familiar sound of the handle turning. I drop my eyes back to the letter, ready and prepared to tell Noah all about it, but it’s going to have to wait becaus
e Noah has set himself a routine.
First, he’s going to walk into the center of my living room and his eyes are going to roam over my face with concern. The second he realizes that I’m fine, his expression is going to soften and warmth is going to spread into his smile. Then, he’s going to ignore my ranting as he raids my fridge and eats everything I own, and just when I think he’s good to leave, he’ll hurry down to my bathroom to chuck a shit. I mean, I love him and all but why does he have to do that in my bathroom? He has a perfectly good one at home.
He’ll swiftly stink out my home and then drop down on the couch beside me before telling me all about his day. I’ll never actually admit to him, but hearing him talk so animatedly about his job and the adventures he gets to go on is what I look forward to most. You know, apart from receiving these letters.
The door opens and I expect Noah to walk across the room as he’s done every other day, but then I feel his heavy gaze trained on me by the door and I can’t help but raise my chin to figure out what the hell he wants.
My eyes snap up and the second they do; my whole fucking world is rocked.
Rivers.
It’s not Noah at all.
I suck in a deep breath as a smile spreads wide across my face. Rivers just stands there, staring at me as though he can’t believe what’s right in front of his eyes. “Fuck, you’re beautiful,” he whispers into the silent room, shaking his head in disbelief.
With his letter clutched firmly in one hand, I throw the horny stick figure blanket off me and fly to my feet as best I can before rushing towards him, but in my excitement, I miss one very important thing – his surprise. His very fucking big surprise.
Only it seems it’s not something that I have to remember as he does all the work for me.
Rivers’ brows drop down in confusion as he throws his hands out and gestures down my body. His eyes bug out of his head and despite his confusion, I can’t help the overwhelming joy pulsing through me. “What the fuck is this?” he demands. “Did I miss something?”
I come to a stop just a few feet in front of him and glance down at the seven-month baby bump protruding from my stomach before looking back up at the shocked man in front of me. I bite my lip as a sheepish expression crosses my face. “I told you I had a surprise for you, didn’t I?”
His mouth drops open before he closes it only for it to drop right back open once again. His eyes rake up and down my body, staring at me in disbelief. “You’re pregnant,” he whispers, still trying to make sense of what’s right in front of him.
My arms circle my stomach as I give him an encouraging smile and slowly take another step towards him. “I am,” I murmur, starting to get a little nervous. I mean, we had only just gotten back together before he had to leave and now I’m springing a baby on him. “I found out about two weeks after you left.”
“I…baby?”
“Yeah,” I smile. “We’re having a baby.”
“This is real? You’re not pulling some sick prank on me? There’s really a baby inside that sexy body of yours?”
“Yes, you dork,” I laugh, taking another step and allowing him to slowly come to terms with the fact that we’re two months out for having a child. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you in our letters, but I couldn’t stand the thought of not telling you this in person.”
Rivers shakes his head in wonder as a smile slowly spreads across his face and suddenly, he’s standing right in front of me, pulling me into his arms and crushing me against his chest. “I fucking love you, Tullz,” he says with a laugh. “We’re going to be parents. We’re having a fucking baby.”
I pull back with tears of joy pooling in my eyes as I look up into his intense, stormy eyes. “You’re ok with this? You don’t hate me?”
“How could I ever hate the woman bringing our child into this world? I’ll admit it, I’m a little confused and…shocked maybe, but babe, I’m fucking ecstatic. I knew I wanted this with you since I was eighteen years old and for so long I thought I’d never get it.” His hands gently come to rest against my stomach as he stares at it in wonder. “This is a fucking gift, Tullz. You’re a fucking gift. I’m just sorry that I haven’t been here to help you with it.”
“Don’t be sorry,” I whisper. “As long as I knew that you were coming home, I could handle just about anything this baby threw my way.”
“You’re my fucking queen, Tully Cage.”
I can’t resist him any longer.
I push myself up onto my tippy toes and throw my arms around his neck while pulling him down to meet mine. My lips press against his and for the first time in seven months, I’m finally home.
I’ve been terrified of telling him about this baby. Most guys would have freaked out. They need time to comprehend this kind of shit and I was scared that he was going to run…well, not permanently, but at least for a few days trying to wrap his head around it, but he didn’t. He accepted this baby just as easily as he accepted me back into his life seven months ago.
I knew he wouldn’t hold it against me for not saying anything as we have a pretty unordinary situation, but I couldn’t stop that feeling that told me that he’d be upset. That he’d think I was hiding this baby from him and that I was purposefully keeping him in the dark, but truth be told, I wanted him focused.
I didn’t want him worrying about me throwing up in the middle of the night or suffering from cramps and heartburn. I needed him to concentrate on the mission. I needed his head in the game because being out on the field like the way he has been is life or death. He’s not playing out there and because of that, I knew it was safer to ask for forgiveness and let him come to terms with the fact that he was going to be a daddy when he returned.
Besides, there’s nothing quite like seeing the look on his face that still hasn’t disappeared. He’s absolutely elated and I realize that I had nothing to fear. He trusts me completely and knows that no matter what, I would have made the right decision for our child.
His hands circle my waist and he holds me tightly, not for one second letting me slip even an inch away. When he releases my lips and pulls back, my body wants to scream out for more. “How are you feeling?” he questions, studying my face.
“I’ve never been better.”
He grins wide and gently skims his lips over mine. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”
I laugh as I watch him still coming to terms with it. “I’ve been fine. There have been a few rough moments, but nothing that I haven’t been able to handle. I didn’t want you missing out on anything so I‘ve been taking lots of photos as my belly grew and documenting everything that the doctor has been telling me. I’ve been really good, Rivers. Eating healthy and exercising as much as I’m allowed.”
“I don’t doubt that,” he murmurs, dropping his gaze down to my stomach once again. “You’re going to make an incredible mother.”
My eyes fill with tears and I curse the stupid hormones coursing through my body that have turned me into this constant state of unstable emotions. “You really think so?”
“I fucking know so,” he tells me before grabbing the hem of my shirt and slowly sliding it up over my stomach. “Let me get a good look at you.”
I raise my hands so he can slip the shirt over my head and not a moment later, it’s dropped to the floor and his hands are instantly cradling my stomach. “Fuck, Tullz,” he says, taking me in with my protruding stomach and swelling breasts. “Pregnancy suits you.”
I smile as he drops to his knees before me, placing him directly in line with my stomach. He leans in and presses a kiss to our baby before looking up at me with nothing but pride. “This is really happening.”
“It is.”
His hands roam over my stomach, caressing it with the utmost care and despite feeling like a cow for the past few months, I’ve never felt so beautiful. “Have you found out the sex yet?”
I shake my head. “No, the doctor asked, but it didn’t feel right without you. I wanted to wait until you
were back. I thought we should do that together or maybe wait until I give birth.”
“I think we should wait,” he agrees. “But what’s your gut telling you? Boy or girl?”
I scrunch up my face, thinking about it for the millionth time. “Up until last week, I was thinking it was a little girl, but now I can’t help this feeling that’s telling me it’s a little boy just like his daddy.”
Rivers pushes back up to his feet and cradles my face. “No, I think you were right. It’s definitely a little girl. Stubborn like her mommy, but when it comes down to it, as long as the baby is healthy and has two parents who love it unconditionally, then it really doesn’t matter.”
My bottom lip pouts out and I instantly turn into a blubbering mess. “Stop it. You’re making me cry,” I tell him, fanning my face to try and control the tears. “I’ve been an emotional wreck.”
“Oh, geez,” he laughs, taking my hand and leading me back towards the couch. “How many buckets of ice cream have you gone through?”
“None,” I snap. “I’ve been healthy, remember.”
Rivers' eyes bulge out of his head. “Shit. I don’t know which is more surprising. The fact that you’re seven months pregnant or that you haven’t been binging on ice cream.”
“Shut up,” I laugh, swatting his arm.
He falls into the couch, pulling me down beside him while being as gentle as can be. Rivers curls an arm around me, drawing me into his chest when he notices the design on the blanket and the cushion covers. He picks one up and studies it with a fond smile. “Shit. I can’t believe you actually did this.”
“Yeah, the second the idea popped into my mind; I couldn’t resist. I got us matching pajamas too.”
“Fuck me,” he groans. “I’m assuming you’re going to force me to actually wear them?”
“You’re damn right, I am.”
Rivers rolls his eyes as I relax deeper into him. “You’re fucking lucky that I love you,” he murmurs making a wicked grin spread across my face.
Unstoppable: Haven Falls (Book 7) Page 19