Lover Reborn: A Novel of the Black Dagger Brotherhood

by J. R. Ward

  “You can bet your life on it.”

  He inclined his head toward her… and promptly disappeared himself far away. Whatever her tracking skills were, she couldn’t follow molecules. No one was that good.

  Not even his Chosen could do that—and thank the Fates for it. For truth, the thought had long lingered in his mind that she might find him if she wished, her blood in him a beacon she could follow for quite some time.

  But she hadn’t done so, and she wouldn’t. She was not of the war—

  His phone went off just as he came back into his physical form on the shores of the Hudson far from downtown. Taking the black device out, he looked at the screen. The picture of an old-fashioned dandy was showing beside writing and numerals he could not decipher—which indicated his contact within the glymera was reaching out to him.

  He hit the button with green lettering on it. “How lovely to hear from you, Elan,” he murmured. “How ever are you doing this fine eve. They are? Indeed. Yes. I shall get back to you on a location—but tell them aye. We shall meet with them posthaste.”

  Perfect, he thought as he hit the red button. The splintering faction of the glymera wanted to meet in person. Things were finally starting to move.

  About time.

  Staring out over the river, he let his aggression flow, but the surge didn’t last. Inevitably, his thoughts returned to his Chosen and that horrid expression on her face.

  She knew who he was now.

  And as all females did, she viewed him as a monster.

  Riding in the back of iAm’s SUV, Qhuinn kept a lookout on all sides of the vehicle in case they were being trailed. He’d also called in V and Rhage to flank the BMW on a just-in-case.

  Not that he’d told them it was the Bastards he was worried about. They had assumed it was lessers, and he’d let them go with that one.

  And John wasn’t driving back to the compound—no reason to get anywhere near home base. Instead, they were going to head out into the ’burbs and go in circles, staying in the human-heavy neighborhoods until Layla had time enough to recover and dematerialize back to the mansion.

  On that note, he glanced over at her. She was staring out the window beside her, her chest rising and falling way too fast.

  But, yeah, finding out you’d helped the enemy—probably saved his life—was not the kind of thing anyone would handle well.

  He leaned over and put his hand on her leg, giving it a squeeze. “It’s okay, baby girl.”

  She didn’t turn her head to him. Just shook it. “How can you say that.”

  “You didn’t know.”

  “He stayed back in town. He didn’t follow us.”

  Good to know. “You’ll let me know if that changes.”

  “Absolutely.” Her voice was dead. “In a moment.”

  Qhuinn cursed under his breath. “Layla. Look at me.” When she didn’t, he put his forefinger on her chin. “Hey, you didn’t know who he was.”

  Layla closed her eyes, as if she wished she could return to whatever night she had met the guy and do everything over.

  “Come here,” he said, pulling her into an embrace.

  She came stiffly to him, and as he rubbed her back, the tension in her muscles was legion.

  “What if the king turns me out?” she said into his pectoral. “What if Phury—”

  “They won’t. They’ll understand.”

  As she shuddered against him, he glanced up at John in the rearview mirror and shook his head at his best friend. Mouthing the words, he said silently, Let’s just drive her in. Xcor stayed back in town.

  John cocked a brow, and then nodded.

  After all, blood sense didn’t lie—although unfortunately, it was a sword that cut both ways. The good news was that the mhis V threw up around the compound would keep anyone on the outside from finding her—which was the reason Throe had been fed in the first place. And at least that connection with Layla was fading with every passing night, even with the Chosen’s blood being so pure.

  “I’ve got nothing of my own,” Layla said roughly. “Nothing. Even my service can be taken away from me.”

  “Shhh… ain’t going to happen. I won’t let it.”

  Man, he prayed that wasn’t a lie. And they damn well had to tell the king and the Primale right away: Their first stop, after they took her to Doc Jane’s, was going to be Wrath’s study. Those two just had to understand where she’d been coming from—she’d been manipulated by the enemy, exploited like any other resource into doing something she never would have volunteered for in a million years.

  He wished he’d killed Xcor when he’d had the chance…

  A good thirty minutes later, John turned off onto the rear road to the training center, and it was another ten before they finally pulled into the parking garage.

  The first clue something was off came when Qhuinn stepped out onto the curb: His skin tightened up in a rush, his blood heating to a boil in his veins for no good reason. And then he popped a giant, throbbing erection.

  Frowning, he glanced around. And John did the same as the guy cracked his door and got out from behind the steering wheel.

  There was… some kind of mojo working in the parking lot. What the fuck?

  “Ah, right, okay, let’s get you to Doc Jane,” Qhuinn said as he took Layla’s elbow, and made sure the front of his hips was covered by the tails of his leather jacket.

  “I’m fine. Honestly—”

  “Then that’s just what the good doctor will tell—”

  As John opened the door to the place and they all stepped inside, Qhuinn lost his train of thought as a wall of hormones smacked right into him. Looking down at his pelvis, he couldn’t believe he was suddenly about to orgasm.

  “Someone’s in her needing,” Layla announced. “I don’t think you two should go in—”

  Far down the hall, Doc Jane all but jumped out of one of the examination rooms. “You have to leave—Qhuinn and John, you’ve got to go—”

  “Who’s—” Qhuinn had to close his eyes and slow his breathing down: The motion was causing his cock to rub against his button fly, threatening a messy explosion. “Who is—”

  As some kind of wave intensified, he lost the ability to speak.

  Fuck, it was like he’d just come through his transition and was surrounded by naked females in all-access positions.

  “It’s Autumn,” Jane said, running toward them and ushering them back out into the parking lot. “Are you okay, Layla?”

  “I’m fine—”

  “She needs a quick physical,” Qhuinn mumbled as he turned for the Shadow’s car. “Just came close to passing out. Text me when you’re done, Layla, ’kay?”

  John was walking like a scarecrow as well—stiffly and without any coordination. Then again, when you had a baseball bat in your pants, you were hardly going to Fred Astaire around.

  As the heavy steel door shut them out, things got a little better, and by the time they had driven through the series of gates, short of a raging hard-on, he was feeling more rational.

  “Jesus,” Qhuinn said. “Bottle that shit and the Viagra boys are out of business.”

  Behind the wheel, John whistled an agreement.

  As the guy drove them around the base of the mountain and approached the main house from the front, Qhuinn squirmed in his leathers.

  He hadn’t done much sexually since… well, shit, almost a year ago, when he’d had some private time with that red-haired guy at the Iron Mask. After that, he hadn’t had much interest in anything or anyone, male or female. He didn’t even wake up hard anymore.

  Hell, given the length of his dry spell, he’d begun to think that he’d just burned through his allotment of orgasms: Considering how much fucking he’d done after his transition, it sure as shit seemed possible.

  But here he was, itching in his seat.

  Next door, John was doing the same, moving this way and that. Jacking himself up, pushing back.

  When the mansion finally made
an appearance out of the mhis, Qhuinn dreaded going inside. There didn’t seem anything even remotely sexy or appealing about heading up to his room alone, jerking off once or twice, and then resuming his vigil in front of a dark TV screen.

  I’ve got nothing of my own. Nothing. Even my service can be taken away from me.

  Layla was so right about that: Although everyone made him welcome here, the bottom line was, he was allowed to hang because he served a purpose for John, as ahstrux nohtrum.

  Like Layla, however, he could be fired.

  And as for his future? He was certainly never going to be mated, because he wasn’t going to condemn some female to a loveless union, and he was never going to have any young—although, considering his mismatched eyes, maybe that was a good thing.

  Bottom line, he was staring down the barrel of countless centuries with no real home, no true family, no blood of his own.

  As he rubbed a hand through his hair and wondered whether there was any possibility his cock would magically deflate… he knew just what that Chosen meant when it came to empty.

  SIXTY

  Xhex needed intel. Stat.

  When Xcor had dematerialized away from her, he’d gone outside the scope of her radar within seconds. And yeah, she had a bead on his direction, but only an asshole wouldn’t camo the way to his hideout.

  Sure enough, as she followed what she could of him, she found herself stuck on the shores of the Hudson not far from her house: The trail got cold at that point, and not because the frigid north wind was blowing down the river.

  She kicked a random snowdrift and paced around. Retraced her steps back to the theater district. Scanned the rest of the city, going rooftop to rooftop.

  Nothing.

  She ended up back on top of that building where she’d seen John and the others, stalking around and cursing like a sailor. In the absence of physical clues, she was forced to go with the only other thing she had: the drama outside that dessert place.

  Taking out her phone, she texted John and waited. And waited. And… waited.

  Did they get ambushed on the way back?

  She texted again. Hit up Qhuinn—and got no reply.

  Damn it, what if something had happened? Just because Xcor had appeared to leave the city, that didn’t mean he couldn’t cycle around and intersect iAm’s SUV. Meanwhile, she was here chasing her tail like an idiot—

  Just as she was about to start another round of near-panicked texting, John hit her back: @ hm safe. Srry wz dwn in clinic.

  Dialing back on her chick-out, she took a deep breath and texted back: We need to talk about Layla. Let me come to the house.

  It was possible that Qhuinn wouldn’t want to leave the Chosen in her condition, and Xhex didn’t want John to drag his ahstrux nohtrum out just for a meeting.

  Instead of waiting for a response, she flashed herself over to the mansion and strode up the steps and into the vestibule. The inner door opened immediately, and Fritz appeared frazzled.

  “Good evening, my lady.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  The butler bowed and shuffled backward. “Oh, indeed. Yes. Whom are you here to see?”

  There was a time when that wouldn’t have been a question. “John. Is he at the clinic?”

  “Oh… no. No, definitely not there. He is upstairs.”

  Xhex frowned. “Is there any problem?”

  “Oh, no. Please, madam, go forth.”

  Bullshit there wasn’t something going on. She crossed the mosaic apple tree at a jog and took the stairs two at a time. When she got to the second floor, she hesitated.

  Even out in the hall, she could catch the scent of sex—a mixed bag of it, actually, suggesting there were multiples going on. Literally.

  And didn’t that make her feel like throwing up.

  As she approached John’s door, she braced herself for whatever could be on the other side. Layla was trained as an ehros, and Qhuinn had long been up for anything—and maybe this separation had led her mate into the arms of others.

  With a dead heart, she knocked loudly. “John? It’s me.”

  Closing her eyes, she imagined naked bodies freezing, people looking back and forth, John scrambling to get something to cover himself. There was no reading grids—she was too scattered to pull that off. No sorting through the scents, either—she was having enough trouble staying on her feet because she knew at least one of them was John’s.

  “I know you’re in there.”

  Instead of the door opening, she got a text on her phone: Am soz—busy. Can I cm find u l8r?

  Fuck that and the horse it rode in on.

  Xhex grabbed the doorknob, twisted hard enough to break the thing off, and shoved her way—

  Holy. Shit.

  John was by himself on his bed, lying on top of twisted sheets, his naked body gleaming in the light that bled in from the bathroom. One hand was between his legs, his big fist locked on his thick cock… the other was gripping the headboard for leverage as he worked himself, his teeth bared, the muscles in his shoulders and neck standing out in stark relief as he strained.

  Shiiiiit. His lower abdomen was slick from other orgasms, and yet he seemed starved for release.

  Fevered eyes met hers as his hand stilled. Go, he mouthed. Please…

  She quickly stepped inside and shut the door. This was not something anyone else needed to see.

  Please! he demanded.

  Please, indeed, she thought to herself, her own body responding, her own blood starting to pump.

  Stepping over the crumpled discards of what he’d been wearing in the theater district, she could think only about how much she had missed the carnal side of him. It was as if she had been shut down during these long months—and yeah, it would have been far better for her to walk out, let him deal with his rock-and-a-hard-place by his lonesome, and reconvene later.

  But, God, she had missed being his female.

  I can’t stop, he mouthed. Autumn in her needing—got too close.

  Ah. That explained it. Except… “Is my mother okay?”

  At Jane’s, and yes.

  God, that poor female. To have to suffer through that again after all she’d been through. But at least Jane would ease the suffering—assuming Tohr didn’t.…

  Right, she was so not getting close to that one.

  Xhex, you have… to go.…

  “What if I don’t want to.”

  At that, his body undulated wildly, sure as if she were already touching him, and he orgasmed hard, his grip slipping up and down as he came all over the muscled expanse of his lower belly.

  Well, wasn’t that a very well-spoken answer: He wanted her, too.

  Xhex stepped up to the edge of the bed and reached out, brushing his churning thigh with her fingertips. The light contact was enough to keep his release going, his hips thrusting up, his sex kicking, his warrior body contracting as the pleasure rocked through him.

  Bending down, she shoved his pumping hand aside and captured him with her mouth, sucking him off, finishing him the right way as he thrashed in the sheets. And as soon as he was done, at least with that particular release, he stilled for only a nanosecond before sitting up and reaching for her.

  She went to him with ease, kissing him as he pulled her on top of his body. His hands, those big, familiar hands, roamed everywhere… until they settled on her ass, and jacked her upward so he could nestle his face into her breasts—

  With a quick slash of his fangs, he bit through her muscle shirt, and latched onto her nipple, sucking, and licking as she helped him out, pulling her jacket off, ditching her weapons, and—

  John flipped her over onto her back and snarled soundlessly at her leathers.

  Things didn’t go well for them—which, considering how tough cowhide was, said something about all the get-naked that was happening. At least he knew better than to mess with her cilices, though.

  As soon as they were in position, he pushed into her with a jab, and the sting of t
he stretch was enough to throw her right into a bone-bending orgasm. He followed, joining her, their bodies working each other while she cried out.

  And still he kept riding her, the relentless pounding giving her more of exactly what she needed.

  Baring her fangs, she waited until he paused for a moment—then she struck. Biting him hard, she shoved him over onto his back, forcing him flat on the mattress so she could straddle him. And as she held him down by the shoulders and drew against his throat, she resumed the fucking, her thighs lifting her up and pushing her down, working his erection.

  John’s surrender to her was complete. His arms stayed to the sides, his strength ceded to her, his body hers to use until she drained him dry up at his neck and down at his hips.

  As she took him, his eyes stayed locked on her face, the love shining out of them so great, they were a pair of blue suns raining warmth all over her.

  How in the world could she ever live without him…

  Releasing his throat temporarily, she rode out the current orgasm, burying her face into his shoulder as things got so violent she couldn’t keep contact with his throat. But she knew his vein was hers for the taking, as soon as it was over…

  Man, life was complicated. But the truth was simple.

  He was her home.

  He was where she belonged.

  Rolling to the side, she encouraged him to follow her, and he came with her as easy as water, as hot as fire. It was his turn to feed… and given the way his eyes zeroed in on her jugular, he agreed with her.

  “Let me seal you first,” she said as she went for her puncture marks.

  He took her wrist and held her back, shaking his head. No—I want to bleed for you.

  Xhex closed her eyes, her throat tightening.

  It was hard to say where this was going to lead them, because she never would have predicted their split in the first place. But it was so damned good to be home… even if this was just a short stay.

  Hours passed, the night waning and dawn arriving; and then the sun rose from the lip of the horizon, ascending to its noonday heights, washing the snow-covered mountain with light.

  Autumn was unaware of any of this—and that would have been true whether she was down in the clinic or up at the mansion… or out in the snow.