Dancing In Darkness

by Sherrie Weynand

  Looking out the window at her gate, she watched planes come and go on the runways. People traveling for various reasons, business or vacation, going to or returning from home. Families reuniting or parting ways for a period of time. She thought that airports had to be both the saddest and happiest of locations all at the same time. While she knew that her daughter wouldn’t be there to greet her, she could only hope that she would be able to meet her face to face.

  Following the birth of her daughter, Nancy had not been in the right place emotionally or mentally. She didn’t know why and post-partum depression was not a topic that was discussed on a frequent basis. It was brushed aside as something that few women suffered from and was not talked about openly. The bond between mother and daughter had never formed as it should and it took years for Nancy to be able to cope with the fact that she had a child. She saw her as someone who had ripped away her dreams. Her husband however had taken to their daughter instantly. It was widely known that she was a daddy’s girl if there ever was one.

  By the time that Nancy could even comprehend the damage that she was doing not only to little Priscilla, but to herself as well by ruining any chance of building a relationship, it was far too late. Priscilla had grown to not only fear her mother, but loathe her. Growing up, all she wanted to do was please her mother and make her proud like the other girls at school did. Their moms would bake for the classrooms, attend all of the plays and musicals, do all of the things that moms do. Hers did none of it. She concentrated on herself and only herself.

  Neil Barnes had stepped in every time he could. He helped her with schoolwork and took her places with him to try and give her a better perspective of the world. He resented the fact that his wife ignored their child. When Nancy first learned she was pregnant, she was happy. She enjoyed the shopping and the planning, picking out nursery furniture and painting the room. From all outward appearances she couldn’t wait until their baby made her presence. Then, things began to change.

  Granted pregnancy is never truly easy. The weight gain, the puffy face, the swollen breasts that get sore, morning sickness, all things that pregnant women worldwide deal with every single day. Sometimes, they take more of a toll on some and not so much on others. Month by month and change by change, Nancy began to resent the little being growing inside her. She made many mentions of wishing she would have had an abortion or wouldn’t have carried it to term. It broke Neil’s heart to hear her talk like this.

  Nancy withdrew from her friends and her family, spending more and more time alone. When her water broke in the middle of the night and the contractions started, she sat in the rocking chair in the nursery saying nothing. Neil found her in the morning.

  “Nancy, for God’s sake let’s get you to the hospital.” He exclaimed.

  “I’ve got time. They say first deliveries take forever. I don’t want to be stuck in that hospital for hours.” She told him.

  “They can help you with the pain, not to mention your water broke and that baby needs to come out.” He replied firmly.

  “Fine, but I’m not ready to go yet.” She stared blankly at the wall.

  Neil knew that mental health issues weren’t dealt with accordingly and he didn’t want to say anything that might cause them to take the baby from her. His wife needed help and he didn’t know where to turn. It scared him to think that she would do anything to harm their unborn child, but it terrified him that she might do something after the birth. With nowhere to turn, he forced her to get in the car and go to the hospital.

  The baby was beautiful and healthy. Ten little fingers and ten little toes. She cried at first, but was a quiet baby. When the nurse came in to fill out paperwork for the birth certificate, they had yet to decide on a name. Nancy had insisted on seeing the baby before choosing a name. Saying she wanted it to fit her personality. Now, with no name and Nancy not wanting to choose one at all, it was up to Neil to decide. The paperwork had to be filed. He chose Priscilla, after his mother. It seemed fitting to honor her in such a way.

  All of these years had passed with no interaction between the women. They were nothing more than strangers related by blood. This was something that had to change. If, her daughter would forgive her. She wasn’t expecting it to be forgotten, only to somehow move forward and grow. Hopefully they had a lot of time to make up for all the years of hurt and anguish. It pained Nancy to know that she was the cause of hurt in her child. She had many years to mentally beat herself up over it.

  So here she sat at the airport waiting to board a plane that would either carry her to her daughter or end up ripping her heart apart. Either way, she had to make this journey. She had booked for a one week return, it would give her a few days to try to reconnect. From there, she was free to change her dates if she had to. Staying in Florida as long as it took to accomplish this. She didn’t want to feel alone in the world and more importantly she was at a place where she didn’t want her child, although an adult, to feel alone any longer, and more than anything she needed a notarized signature.

  When her plane touched down and she had secured her rental car she located the last known address she had for her daughter. When she found it, she looked around the dilapidated building with a great sadness. Had her own flesh and blood been reduced to living in this? Parking the car and setting the alarm, she made her way to the building. She knew that she needed apartment number four. She began to climb the stairs when a door opened downstairs.

  “Who the hell is going up there?” A smoke graveled voice called from below her.

  “Hello, I’m Nancy Barnes. I was trying to find my daughter, Priscilla Barnes. This was the last address I had for her.” She replied coolly.

  “Yeah well there ain’t no Priscilla Barnes here.” He rudely exclaimed. “Come on down from there an’ get out of my building.” The grizzled old man told her. “Hey, wait a minute…ain’t that the stripper girl that lived up there? The stuck up beauty queen type?”

  “Stripper girl? Beauty queen?” Nancy looked puzzled.

  “Yeah she moved oh bout three months ago, maybe two. Long brown hair, always late on her rent. I know her. That bitch threatened to kick me in the nuts.” The man told her. “I’m Bill Wiley an’ you are?”

  “I’ve already told you who I am.” She responded icily. She hadn’t talked to her daughter but it gave no one else to call her a bitch.

  “You might be able to catch her at that club she was working at. Gina’s. No, it wasn’t that, oh hell, Nina’s. Yeah, Nina’s Place.” He told her.

  “Where would I find this Nina’s Place, Mr. Wiley?” She asked him. He made her uncomfortable with the way he looked at her and could only imagine living here in the same building.

  “Go down a few blocks and make a left. I can’t remember what street it’s on. You’ll see it. I don’t remember hearing her name being one of the ones that had been murdered from there.” Wiley told her. “Now go, I got shit I gotta do.”

  “Thank you for your information.” Nancy said as she quickly left the building.

  “She had resorted to stripping?” Nancy questioned herself.

  Nancy drove along making every left turn and going about five blocks only to turn around and start again. On the third attempt, she located the large neon sign that read, Gina’s Place. The other eye catching detail was the flashing neon sign under the name. “Come home soon, Ms. Pris.”

  “Please tell me that is not her they are referring to.” Nancy tried to close her eyes against the thoughts that were invading her mind. She kept reminding herself, “You are not here to judge, you are here to rebuild. If you screw this up Nancy, it’ll be your fault.”

  She had never stepped a foot inside a strip club before and was almost embarrassed to do so now. What would anyone think of her if they saw her? Finding the nearest person she could see, the place was almost deserted, she walked to the bar. Without missing a beat, the bartender asked her, “What’ll it be?”

  “No, nothing to drink. I’m trying to find
my daughter and I believe she works here. Priscilla Barnes?” Nancy explained to him.

  The sound of the shattering glass caught the attention of everyone in the building.

  “I’m sorry, did you say Priscilla?” He asked her to repeat herself.

  “Yes, yes I did. Am I missing something here?” She asked sounding more confused than ever.

  “Give me one minute, I need to call Nina.” He told her. “Here, have a soda while I call her.”

  “No thank you, but I will take an ice water if you don’t mind.” She said.

  Here she was sitting at a bar in a strip club with a glass of water, while the bartender called the owner about her daughter. None of this was making sense and Nancy could feel her frustration growing. When she mentioned Priscilla’s name it was like the bartender had seen a ghost. Now that she thought about it, why was her name on a sign that read “come home soon”?

  “Nina, its Rob. Sorry to disturb you but I need you here at the club immediately.” He spoke softly into the phone.

  “What is it? Is it something that you can’t handle yourself?” She questioned him.

  “Ummm…you could say that.” He replied. “Just get here, like yesterday.”

  Adam was watching Nina on the phone and her facial expression changed from irritation to confusion.

  “Everything okay?” He asked her.

  “I don’t know, honestly. That was the oddest phone call I’ve ever had from him or anyone at the club.” She said. “Do you want to ride with me to see what the hell is going on?”

  “Yeah, of course I’ll go with you.” He replied, now his confusion was as great as his.

  The few minutes it took them to get to the club was passed in silence. Both of them trying to comprehend what was so pressing that she had to be there immediately, or in Rob’s words, ‘yesterday’. Parking wasn’t an issue this time of day and they were able to park in front of the entry. When they walked in the first thing Adam noticed was a brunette woman sitting at the bar. When he looked closer he noticed that she had very familiar features.

  “Rob, what’s going on?” Nina called over the bar to him.

  “Nina, thanks for coming in, this lady needs to speak to you.” Rob told her.

  Nina was more than pissed. He called her in to talk to some woman that was sitting at the bar, probably pissed off that her husband was spending all of his money on one of her girls and she wanted it to stop. She had seen this song and dance too many times to count and didn’t appreciate being interrupted during the current crisis in order to deal with this shit.

  Calming herself before she spoke, Nina looked at the woman. “Hi, I’m Nina Powalski, what can I help you with?”

  “Ms. Powalski, my name is Nancy Barnes, I’m looking for my daughter Priscilla. I was told that she works her?” Nancy told the woman,

  Nina couldn’t speak and Adam looked as though he were about to hit the floor himself. Nina whispered to Rob to get her a glass of water. When she had regained her composure somewhat she sat down on a barstool next to the woman.

  “Would anyone care to tell me what the hell is going on?” Nancy was beginning to lose her cool exterior. Something was wrong and she wanted to know what it was.

  “I think we should go to my office, Mrs. Barnes.” Nina told her.

  Nina was angry. “No! Someone tell me right now. Right here.”

  “Fine. We don’t know where Priscilla is. We know that she was attacked and kidnapped by a local police detective. We at this point do not know if she is alive or dead. There were three girls from here at the club who were murdered. Priscilla had received a note in her apartment that told her she was next.” Nina said in a no holds barred confession.

  “What?” Nancy exclaimed.

  “You wanted to know, that was it in a nutshell.” Nina stated. “Now for you, it’s none of my business perhaps, but then again it is because I consider Priscilla to be a daughter, because the likes of you did nothing but put her down, wish ill on her, and treat her like shit. You see, there are those of us who care for her legitimately and not only when it suits them. It took you twenty eight years to try to find your daughter? Now what, you want mother of the year award?” Nina was livid. Her face was red and she was almost screaming.

  Adam looked at Nina, “Hey, calm down a little. I know you are upset, but this isn’t doing us any good.”

  Nancy didn’t fail to respond, “Yes, because you owning a strip club and putting your so called adopted daughter to work is so much better? Who the fuck are you to come down on me? Wait let me guess, you cared for her when no one else would. You gave her the job so she could support herself. To live a life of luxury.”

  “You bitch. Yes, I care for her, we all did and we all still do. Yes I gave her a job so she wouldn’t end up on the street the next morning because her rent was late and her pervert of a landlord only wanted to fuck her to pay off her debt, and no, I wasn’t providing her with a life of luxury. That would have been Adam there.” Nina stood up to the woman.

  Adam could feel the blood drain from his face. Nina had unceremoniously pulled him into the middle of this confrontation. Not something that he wanted to be a part of, but he would definitely have Priscilla and Nina’s backs. He knew the resentment that Priscilla had towards this woman and he wasn’t about to stand here and idly let her pick away at Nina.

  “You two both need to calm down. Right now, we all have bigger issues than who was the better mother. Yes all of what Nina said is true. Everyone is trying to find Priscilla.” Adam stepped in to play referee between the women.

  Nancy was the first to speak up. “Let’s try this again. I apologize for getting upset, however being that I was told my daughter is missing and may or may not be alive, it caught me off guard.”

  “Agreed, my apologies as well. I am tired and scared.” Nina smiled at the woman for the first time.

  As Adam began to tell Nancy the entire story, she felt her heart sink. It never had occurred to her that she wouldn’t have a chance to talk with Priscilla. He went on to explain that the police were doing everything they could do and the FBI was performing searches of all outlying areas.

  “All we can do now is wait.” He finished up.

  Nancy and Nina both were in tears. They had to find a way to come to terms with all of this. They hadn’t heard from Det. Tony in several hours and they were completely in the dark. All Nina could think about was Priscilla somewhere alone. Nancy was thinking about how she had affected every one of Priscilla’s life choices and how in the end, this was her fault. The guilt was incredibly heavy. She had no intention on being part of any new drama, but she would accept responsibility for her part.

  Adam was contemplating the arrival of Nancy Barnes. He and Priscilla had talked at length about the woman. She was a far cry from a good mother, but at a time like this it wasn’t appropriate to drudge up old demons. There were plenty of the current real ones to deal with. Planning on finding her alive, he also thought it would be a good idea for her not to be there when they do or at least not be wherever they bring her after finding her. These were not going to be easy topics and he would have to handle them delicately. Everyone was like a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. Their main concern as of now should not be any of them. Only Priscilla. That was the only thing he could think of. He would hold her again and this time she would never leave.

  As they sat at the bar discussing what to do next, Mike Ward had finally reached the cabin. From the outside, everything looked as he left it. When he opened the door to go in, he let out a long howl of anger.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  Storming into the cabin, Ward could instantly see that the knife he had on the makeshift countertop was gone. That meant that she was gone. “How the fuck did she get out of here?” He questioned himself. Checking the small room that had held her, he found remnants of the rope. A fit of rage enveloped him and he punched his fist through the wall. Now he had to find her. He had to track her down and hunt her, like the lo
wly animal he considered her to be.

  The only weapon he had was his service revolver. The bitch had taken his knife. None of this was supposed to turn into this. He should have killed her when he had the chance, but no, she had deserved to suffer and he had to play good cop. “Fuck!” He screamed. Knowing he had been gone for hours was going to make it difficult to find her. He had to. Even if he didn’t he was sure that she was injured severely enough that she would die out in the elements. Too much movement and she would bleed. Not enough movement and he would find her. He would start at the cabin and circle it, expanding out each trip around. It didn’t matter how long it took him he would find her or her cold, dead body.

  Darkness had set in and he was going to have to work by flashlight. Knowing she didn’t have any light gave him the upper hand. He set out on his search. “You can come out any time now, it will be easier on you and on me.” He called out to the dark woods around him. Walking slowly and deliberately like he was searching for evidence, he examined everything around him. She had to have left footprints in the soft dirt and the dried, dead leaves. Finding no trace in his first circle, he widened out by fifteen feet or so. He was nothing but methodical in his actions.

  From her hiding place in the hill she could barely make out the faint sounds of a man’s voice. It was still very far away and she knew then that she made it further than she originally thought. That made her feel better, yet she knew that he was out looking for her. She had the knife for some type of protection but didn’t know what he had. Did she have the strength to fight with him? The doubts set in and she tried to fight it off. She needed sleep but was afraid to close her eyes.

  He was on his fourth circle around the cabin and still called out to her. He wanted her to know that he was going to find her. His steps approximately the same stride length each and every time. He wasn’t worried about being quiet and let the twigs beneath him crack. The more she could possibly hear and the more fear it instilled the more enjoyment he was going to get.