Devil’s Food Cake Murder
Page 28
*** - If you’re giving this as a gift and you want this cake to look really colorful, use red salmon instead of less expensive pink salmon and pick off all the grey skin after you drain it. The lucky kitty recipient won’t care, but the kitty’s human caretaker might.
You will need 3 pie plates or 3 layer cake pans to make this cake. (I used disposable pie pans.)
Spray the 3 pans with Pam or another nonstick cooking spray.
Press the pound of ground chicken into the bottom of the first pan, spreading it out evenly.
Press the pound of ground turkey into the bottom of the second pan, spreading it out evenly.
Drain the can of salmon. Pick out the bones and remove the grey skin if you wish.
Pat the salmon dry with paper towels, and then flake it into a small bowl. (You can also put it in the food processor and give it a few whirls with the steel blade to chop it all up.)
Mix in the beaten egg (or put it through the tube of your food processor if you used one).
Mix in the cracker crumbs (or put them through the tube of your food processor if you used one).
Once the salmon, egg, and cracker crumbs are thoroughly mixed, press them into the last pan you prepared, and spread them out as evenly as possible.
Bake the ground meat and the salmon patty in the pans at 350 degrees F. for 25 to 30 minutes.
Use a turkey baster to suck out the grease and dispose of it. Let the meat and the salmon cool completely in the pans, cover them with plastic wrap, and refrigerate them for at least an hour.
Hannah’s 1st Note: You can do this the night before you plan to assemble the cake and refrigerate the meat and fish overnight. If you do this, the cake will be firmer and easier to frost.
To assemble the Good Kitty Cake, first you must make the frosting. Unwrap the cream cheese and place it in a medium-sized, microwave-safe bowl. Heat it on HIGH for 30 seconds.
Try to stir the cream cheese. If it’s still too firm on top to stir, flip the top brick of cheese so it’s on the bottom and heat it on HIGH for another 30 seconds.
Try to stir again. If it’s still too firm, give it another 15 seconds on HIGH. That should be enough to heat it through and soften it enough to spread on your Good Kitty Cake.
Hannah’s 2nd Note: When I make this 3-layer cake, I like to put the salmon layer in the middle. I use either the ground turkey or the ground chicken layer on the bottom.
Take one disk of ground meat out of its pan and place it on a cake plate. Spread a little of the frosting on top.
Take the salmon disk out of its pan and place that on top of the ground meat. Spread a little more frosting on top of the salmon layer.
Take the third disk of ground meat, put it on top of the second, and spread a little more frosting on top. Cover this disk completely with frosting since it’ll be the top of your cake.
Spread frosting on the sides of your cake with a spatula or frosting knife.
If you have any “frosting” left over, swirl in a bit of jam and spread it on your toast in the morning. Now don’t make a face. It’s true that cats love cream cheese, but it’s for humans, too!
Use some of the kitty treats to decorate the top of your cake. Arrange them artistically on the frosting. (Actually, the lucky kitty recipient won’t really care if they’re artistic or not.)
Keep this cake REFRIGERATED until you serve it to your favorite feline.
Hannah’s 3rd Note: This Good Kitty Cake is very rich. It’s the frosting. Dole it out to your kitty in very small pieces.
Yield: Enough for the “good kitty” and five or six feline friends.
Chapter Thirty-One
The launch party was almost over when Norman arrived. He came straight over to Hannah and waited until she’d served the people in line.
“Can I see you alone for a minute?” he asked.
Hannah took one look at his miserable expression, and her mind went on full alert. Something was horribly wrong. She’d known it for a while, but today it was clearly devastating. Norman was in some kind of terrible trouble.
“Let’s go back here,” Hannah said, signaling for Lisa to take over the serving table and drawing Marge’s library keys from her apron pocket. She led Norman to the little room that Marge used as an office, and unlocked the door.
There were two chairs against one wall. Hannah moved a stack of books from one chair and an untidy pile of papers from the other. “Sit down, Norman,” she invited, sitting down in one chair and gesturing toward the other.
“I…really don’t know how to tell you this, Hannah,” Norman began, but he had to stop and clear his throat.
“It can’t be that bad,” Hannah said, forcing a smile, although she knew full well it could be that bad. “Just tell me.”
“I have to find a new home for Cuddles.” Norman swallowed hard, and Hannah noticed that his voice was shaking. “She’s allergic.”
“Who’s allergic?” The question popped out of Hannah’s mouth. It served to make Norman look even more miserable, and she almost wished she hadn’t asked.
“Bev,” he answered.
The name hung between them like a pirate flag, all cross-bones and skulls, conjuring up dire warnings, mayhem, and death on the high seas. The silence seemed interminable, until Hannah finally broke it.
“Doctor Bev,” she said, giving a tight little nod.
“Yes.”
Hannah saw the telltale brightness in Norman’s eyes, and she knew that he was close to tears. He loved Cuddles as much as she loved Moishe. “Can’t you just bring Cuddles out to my place when she comes over?”
“No, that won’t work. Would you please keep her just until I can find someone else to…to love her and give her a good home?”
“You don’t have to look for anyone else,” Hannah said quickly, reaching out to take his hand. “Not when you have me. I’ll keep Cuddles. Moishe adores her, and so do I. They’ll be good company for each other while I’m at work.”
“Oh, Hannah! That would be so perfect! You have no idea what this means to me! You’re such a good person and I…I love you so much!”
You love me so much, but you’re giving up your adored pet for Doctor Bev? Hannah’s mind quickly got to the crux of the matter, but she didn’t want to say anything that inflammatory. Maybe there was a reasonable explanation, but she’d never know what it was unless she asked. “I don’t understand, Norman. Why do you have to give up Cuddles? Why don’t you just visit Bev at her place and let Cuddles stay at home with you?”
“Because …” Norman stopped again, and an expression of pain crossed his face. “Because Bev’s moving in with me.” He stopped again to take several rapid breaths. “I didn’t want to tell you, Hannah. I tried to think of some way out of it, but I…I have to marry Bev.”
Hannah stared at him uncomprehendingly while he gazed at her, utterly miserable. They stayed like that for what seemed like hours and then Hannah spoke again.
“You have to marry her?”
“Yes. Bev gave me an ultimatum. If I don’t marry her, she won’t let me be a part of Diana’s life.”
Hold it! What was going on here?! Hannah’s mind asked, and she couldn’t even begin to answer. She felt a bit like an actress who’d been thrust on stage in front of a packed house without ever having read the script. “Who’s Diana?” she finally asked.
Norman sighed heavily. “Bev was pregnant when she broke off our engagement, and she chose not to tell me. Diana is my daughter.”
DEVIL’S FOOD CAKE MURDER RECIPE INDEX
Butterscotch Bonanza Bars
Death by Caffeine (Mocha Trifle)
Carrot-Oatmeal Muffins
Red Devil’s Food Cake
Fudgy Frosting
Mini Mac Cookies
Papaya Mac Cookies
Orange or Lemon Creams
Janelle’s Quick and Easy Chicken Soup
Big Soft Chewy Molasses Cookies
Brisket and Veggies
Sally’s Cinnamon Supre
me Coffee
Pear Crunch Pie
Sally’s Apricot Bread
Chocolate Apricot Bread Pudding
Raspberry Vinegar Cookies
Chocolate Euphoria Cookie Bars
Pineapple Casserole
Homemade Sweetened Condensed Milk
Substitute for Sweetened Condensed Milk
Nutmeg Snaps
Strawberry Shortbread Bar Cookies
Welsh Rarebit
Chocolate-Covered Raisin Cookies
Good Kitty Cake
Baking Conversion Chart
These conversions are approximate, but they’ll work just fine for Hannah Swensen’s recipes.
VOLUME:
U.S. Metric
½ teaspoon 2 milliliters
1 teaspoon 5 milliliters
1 tablespoon 15 milliliters
¼ cup 50 milliliters
1/3 cup 75 milliliters
½ cup 125 milliliters
¾ cup 175 milliliters
1 cup ¼ liter
WEIGHT:
U.S. Metric
1 ounce 28 grams
1 pound 454 grams
OVEN TEMPERATURE:
Degrees Fahrenheit Degrees Centigrade British (Regulo) Gas Mark
325 degrees F. 165 degrees C. 3
350 degrees F. 175 degrees C. 4
375 degrees F. 190 degrees C. 5
Note: Hannah’s rectangular sheet cake pan, 9 inches by 13 inches, is approximately 23 centimeters by 32.5 centimeters.