The Art of Love
Page 6
I looked over as Missy’s mouth fell open, and I instantly blushed. Did he do this before he decided to completely stand me up? Had I told him about today? Oh, yeah, I had told him when we were on the boat that we would be here all day trying on dresses. He had a really good memory, and though I was pissed at him, I was pretty impressed by his handiwork. I reached out and took the envelope from the woman’s hand and looked down at the cursive writing on the front. I think I stood there for like ten minutes while Missy helped spread out the rest of the food.
Finally, she came over to me, hip checking me and looking down at the card. I was grasping it so hard my fingertips were white, and I didn’t know if I could actually open it or not. What if it had been a gesture before he decided to stand me up? How awkward would that be? Or maybe he was expecting me to forget everything and call him right away. I didn’t know how I would even start that conversation.
There was no way around it—I was completely taken aback by that gesture. If he had done this as an apology, it was pretty sneaky. He sent over a huge spread to me and my best friend and didn’t even have to face me while I was still pissed. There was no way this guy, or any guy, came up with that on his own. Immediately I looked over at Missy and squinted my eyes, wondering about her involvement.
“Wasn’t me,” she said, putting her hands in the air. “Are you going to read that card or just hold it like a statue?”
I looked down at the card having completely forgotten that I was holding it in my hands. I slowly opened the envelope and pulled the note out, smelling his cologne still lingering on the paper. On the outside was a kitten hugging a turtle. I shook my head and opened the card wide, laughing as another kitten appeared, its arms reaching upward and out of the card. Inside he’d written a short but to-the-point message:
Eliza,
I am an asshole. Could you ever find it in your heart to forgive me?
Xoxo
Anthony
I rolled my eyes and smiled, closing the card. He had written “Have a great day wedding dress shopping” on the back . I let out a deep breath and looked up at Missy, who was trying to hide a smile. I shoved the card back in the envelope. My first stubborn instinct was to tell him to shove it up his ass, but without warning, I had this overwhelming want and need to call him. I knew I couldn’t do that—it was too soon and he would think he had won.
I shook my head. Listen to me, planning out my strategy to defend myself against the hot Italian widower like I was at war or something. I put the card in my purse where my phone was and tossed it on the chair, looking back at Missy. The table was full of food, both vegan and non-vegan, and my stomach began to growl.
“What the hell are we waiting for?” I laughed and grabbed Missy’s hand, pulling her over to the table.
We sat down and I looked around at the food, shaking my head at the thoughts in my mind. He was continuing to surprise me, though the surprise before this I could have done without. Missy took a bite of her cucumber sandwich and groaned at how good it was. She looked at me and set the sandwich on the plate.
“You okay?” She tilted her head at me like a puppy.
“Yeah,” I sighed. “Talk about sending confusing signals.”
“He was trying to apologize,” she said with a grin. “I kind of think it’s sweet.”
“Yeah, if he had stepped on my foot or given me the flu,” I argued. “But he stood me up.”
“I know,” she sighed.
In reality, though, I couldn’t help but be completely warmed by the gesture, and I had to get ahold of myself.
Chapter Ten
Anthony
“And the numbers have risen since October,” Jerry, our CFO, explained. “Anthony, do you have anything to add?”
“Um, no,” I said, snapping myself back to reality.
Jerry gave me a strange look and sat down, the next speaker standing up. My mind had been on Eliza all day, and this meeting was no exception. She was driving me nuts. Actually, I was driving myself nuts over her. I had planned it all out perfectly, ordered everything I thought she would like, ordered everything vegan for Missy, and had the food sent over to the bridal shop for dinner. I even had the florist deliver fresh roses to be placed in the middle of the table. To top it all off I sent her a card I knew that she would find cute and endearing. I literally thought of everything and checked it over with Melinda before finalizing all of the plans.
Melinda had seemed impressed and told me good luck before I sent over the order and called the shop’s owner again. I didn’t know what was going on; maybe they didn’t get it. I looked up at the speaker and pushed out my chair, quietly excusing myself from the meeting. If I wanted to get anything done, I needed to know for sure that I had done everything that I could. I called the bridal shop and talked to the owner, who assured me that they got all the food, the flowers, and the card. I asked her how she took it, but she clamped down hard, showing Eliza privacy and solidarity. I could understand that the woman didn’t know me.
I hung up the phone and leaned against the wall, a depressing feeling dripping into my stomach. There was no way I was going back into that meeting looking like someone had just kicked my puppy. The last thing I wanted was for the senior managers to think I had something going on that I couldn’t handle. In reality, they would be right—I did have something going on, and I had no idea what to do about it. Women had been a mystery my whole life, and I always thought that Amy made it easy for me. Now, I was facing a situation with a woman I barely knew, and all the answers seemed so far away.
I had sent over dinner and a card to apologize to Eliza, and I had heard absolutely nothing back. I knew at that point I should let it go, but at the same time, I didn’t know if I could. I had always had everything go the way I wanted it to, and this was completely out of my hands. I could call Missy, but I figured she would treat me the same way the bridal shop owner had, and for good reason.
I looked back at the meeting and sighed, deciding it was best I just called it quits on the meeting front for the day. I stopped in the employee lounge and grabbed a cup of coffee. We were out of creamer, so I opted to drink it black, feeling like my luck had just flat run out. I walked back to my office and looked up at my secretary.
“Can you order more cream for the employee lounge?”
“Yes, sir,” she said. “And your mail is on your desk.”
As I walked forward, I shut the door behind me, sighing deeply. I plopped down in my office chair and picked up Amy’s picture for a moment before setting it back down. Why did everything have to be so difficult? I checked my phone for messages, but there was nothing. I picked up the stack of mail on my desk and started to go through it, tossing the junk mail in the trash can. I had everything delivered to the office so I wouldn’t have to deal with mail at the apartment building. Suddenly I stopped, grasping a white envelope in my hand with my name etched across the front of it in cursive.
I pulled the envelope to my face and took in a deep breath, smelling that familiar scent of patchouli and lavender. Quickly I tore it open and laughed at the picture of a cat with boxing gloves on the front of it. I opened it up and immediately noticed Eliza’s signature. She had sent me a card back, which was definitely in her character. I let out a deep breath as I held the card in my hand, almost too afraid to read the words etched across the inside.
Anthony,
You sure do know how to bomb a date, as well as knowing how to make one awesome. I forgive you for now, but don’t think you are off the hook. You have some serious butt kissing to do.
Xoxo
Eliza
I turned the card over and saw that she had written on the back of the card as well. “Have a good day in the marketing world,” it said. I smiled big, realizing that she had forgiven me. I didn’t think that it was possible, but she had actually forgiven me. I flipped the card back into the envelope and turned it over, realizing that she hadn’t sent the card through the mail. I jumped up from my chair and ran ou
t of the office, holding the letter up to my secretary.
“Who delivered this card?” I really hoped that Eliza was still there.
“It was a carrier service,” she said carefully. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” I said disappointedly, tapping the doorframe. “Thanks.”
I stood there for a second, staring at the envelope and wondering what my next step was. Should I call her? Should I text her? I glanced up at my secretary, who was still staring at me confused, and smiled, turning back toward the office. I sat back down behind my desk and plopped the envelope down, thinking about Eliza. She had received my message, and instead of running for the hills like any normal girl would do, she put herself out there and decided to forgive me. I couldn’t quite understand what the hell she saw in me. I was a widower with severe commitment issues and the inability to move past my own fears.
I sighed, sketching a box on the paper on my desk as I imagined Eliza picking out the kitty boxer card and writing me that message. She was definitely a brave girl, which should have encouraged me but instead made me just a little nervous. I had gotten her to forgive me, but now I had to actually show her that I was serious about what I had said. I had to open myself up to her, which was not really on my list of things that I wanted to do. This was why Melinda told me I had to be ready.
Tuesday had been such a blur for me, and the day started out just fine. I was excited to see Eliza that night, work was easy for a Tuesday, and I had made sure to make reservations at this eclectic restaurant in Lower Manhattan. I knew it would fit her personality and she would really like it, so I made sure we had a really good table. My secretary had scheduled the car out for where we were going, including to pick up Eliza, and all that was left to do was make it until eight when I picked her up. But then it happened, the unthinkable.
I walked into the office, not realizing I had anyone inside. As soon as I hit the doorway I froze, looking in at Amy’s mom sitting at my desk. I had gotten really close to her before Amy died, but she lived in Canada, so I didn’t see her very often. She was there visiting friends and thought she would stop by and check on me.
When I walked into the office, she was holding Amy’s picture and looking down with tears in her eyes. I walked over and set my briefcase down, letting her have a moment to collect herself. She put the picture down and looked at me fondly, wrapping her arms around me and squeezing tightly.
“It’s so good to see you,” she had said. “I wanted to come by and make sure you were doing okay.”
“It’s really good to see you too,” I said.
We sat and talked for several hours, catching up on life and family, and reminiscing about Amy. By the time our conversation was over, my chest was throbbing and I could feel that same feeling I had when I had lost her. I started to second-guess myself, get scared, and I completely froze. I canceled the car service and closed myself in the office, pulling out the bottle of whiskey I kept in my bottom drawer. I sat there for hours, long after Eliza had figured out I wasn’t coming, just completely losing it. It didn’t happen very often, but when it did, it was hard. After that, I had no idea how to explain it to Eliza, so I hid like I always did when something was uncomfortable.
I knew when I woke up that what I had done was terrible, but it was over and I didn’t know what to do. I sat there in my apartment thinking about how much of an asshole I was until finally I pulled it together and went to work. Normally I had been fine seeing Amy’s family, but for some reason that time it was a game changer for me. Maybe it was because I had Eliza on my mind. Maybe it was the fact that I had been thinking about Amy a lot over the last week. Whatever it was, her mom’s presence threw me for a loop.
I knew that it was a situation that could have been explained if I had taken the time to call Eliza and actually explain it to her. But I didn’t. I got drunk and passed out as soon as I walked into my house. I didn’t know what to say to the girl, anyway. I mean how was I going to tell her that I was canceling our date because my dead wife’s mother had come into town and now I was a shitty, crybaby mess? She would have thought I was insane or feel like many girls had, that somehow Amy was still a threat to them.
I sighed and looked down at the computer, trying to figure out what to do. I thought about asking Melinda again, but I had asked that girl too many love questions already. If I kept going I was going to have to give her a promotion. How would I explain that one to the upper management? I grabbed my phone and opened up the texts, deciding that something had to be done or I was going to lose my marbles.
Anthony: I got your card. It was sweet and funny. Thank you for giving me another chance. I’d love to take you on that date. Just let me know when you are free.
I looked at the text message several times before taking a deep breath and pressing the Send button. Hopefully, between the dinner and the card, she was going to have a good response to that. Her own card admitted I needed to make it up to her, so that was exactly what I was going to try to do if she would let me. She was one hell of a woman, and I didn’t want to lose out on that opportunity.
I set the phone down and stared at the screen, hoping beyond hope that she was going to reply. It was going to be a really long night if she didn’t.
Chapter Eleven
Eliza
I was so used to having Saturday morning to ease into work, but this morning was absolutely nuts. I woke up before the sun had completely risen, my phone blasting loudly on the dresser. I groaned as I tumbled out of the bed and grabbed the phone, knowing it had to be some demon employee from the shop needing something. I cleared my throat and answered.
“Buddha himself better have just walked into the shop,” I said.
“Yeah, no, but a new client wants to test out a class,” she said.
“Ugh,” I replied. “I hate when they do that. It’s like they think that their one class will suddenly change everything about them.”
“I know,” she said. “But I need you here in thirty.”
“All right,” I sighed. “I’m on my way.”
I rushed through the house throwing on clothes and pulling back my hair in a way that was easy but wouldn’t make me look like complete trash. I hated when things like this happened, but there was no way I was going to turn down a client. Most of them tried the place before purchasing a larger package, but usually if you didn’t get them by the time they left, they wouldn’t come back. People liked to dabble in fitness, but they didn’t like to fully commit. It was mind-boggling to me that you would spend money to come in just once, but we had quite a few of those.
There was so much going on, and I needed to get the marketing efforts going before things got too late in the season. There were several companies that I was looking at, but picking one was really based on how capable they were at making a difference and how much their services cost. Though I didn’t want to pay the highest cost, there was no point in paying the lowest if they weren’t going to do anything good for the business. There was too much at stake for me to make a wrong decision in this, and I wanted to be successful so that Missy would make me partner.
I grabbed my coffee and the clean towels and headed downstairs and out onto the sidewalk. The artists were just starting to arrive and set up, knowing that Saturday was a big money day for them, especially with tourists. The air was clear and fresh, and I let that and the coffee wake me up as I walked along. It was going to suck when winter hit, but for now, I just wanted to enjoy the air, the sunshine, and the fact that everyone was going to be in a good mood because for them it was the weekend. I was pretty sure I was never going to have another weekend to myself again. That was okay, though, especially since I was chasing my dreams and trying to get away from taking help from my family, I didn’t go to college for nothing.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, but it was just a weather alert. I looked down thinking about Anthony and everything that had gone on recently. He had bailed on me but then tried to make up for it with a card and elaborate dinner
for Missy and me. I guess it did do something to me because I sent him a card back, letting him know he was forgiven. After he got my card he texted me, wanting me to go out with him. At first, I thought about just jumping in and doing it, but then my anxiety took over and I realized how bad it felt to be stood up.
I was really gun-shy about Anthony now, and even though he really seemed to mean what he said, I just didn’t know if I could trust him again. He seemed to be on my mind more often than not, which I knew was a sign that my heart was sending me, but my mind was playing a game of tug-of-war. I needed to keep my mind on track, not letting everything get to me so badly and focusing on the business like I had decided to do long before I ever met Anthony. He was a sweet guy, and I knew that a lot of the things that were less desirable about him were due to his wife’s death, but that didn’t mean it was easy to take on.
I took in a deep breath as I reached the studio and flung open the door, now awake and perky. Lily, one of the employees, was standing at the front desk, smiling and holding out a file for the new client. I took the file and sighed, opening up and seeing notes on her. She wanted to try the studio out because she was getting married in a year and wanted to be in top shape.
“Her name is Tabitha, and she is waiting in the weight training room,” Lily said.
“Okie dokie,” I said .
I walked into the weight training room and smiled, looking over at an already relatively fit blonde woman. From the looks of her brand-new workout clothes and the diamond earrings in her ears, she was definitely a girl there on daddy’s dime. Immediately I went to work, showing her that weight training was not the only thing she needed to focus on. It was a consultation, so we didn’t really do a lot of working out, but she was okay with that. By the end of the meeting, she had set herself up and paid for three weight training and two yoga sessions a week. She really got into the whole idea of changing things up and focusing on her inner calm as much as her physique.