She Had No Choice

by Debra Burroughs

  “Oh, Alex, this place is wonderful. I’ll bet the food is really good, too.”

  “It is. My parents brought me and my brothers here after I graduated from high school to celebrate.” He opened his menu to read the offerings.

  “So many things on the menu look good. I don’t know what to choose.” Eva commented.

  “Welcome to Chandlers,” the formally-dressed waiter said as he approached their table. “Have you had an opportunity to peruse the menu?”

  Alex and Eva made their selections, with the help of the waiter and his suggestions, and they enjoyed their delicious food along with good conversation.

  “Eva, I’m so glad you agreed to come tonight.”

  “Me, too. I’m having a wonderful time.”

  “Do you remember the first time we met?” Alex asked.

  “Yes. You followed me to Piedmont Park in junior high and we had lunch together.”

  “Do you know why I followed you that day?”

  “No. Why?”

  “I followed you because you weren’t the same as the other girls. I noticed you in class and wondered what you were like, what your life was like. You seemed interesting and mysterious.”

  “Me? Interesting and mysterious?” she asked, incredulous that anyone would think her interesting and mysterious.

  “Yes. And I was right. You were smart and strong…and pretty, too.”

  “What do you mean ‘were’?” she asked jokingly.

  “You’re right, you’re right. You are smart and strong and pretty.”

  “Thank you.” Eva smiled sweetly at him. “Do you mind if I ask you something?” A question had been nagging her for awhile.

  “Sure.”

  “Why is a great guy like you still single? I mean, why hasn’t some lucky woman already snatched you up?”

  “Well, someone did once,” Alex replied.

  “What do you mean? What happened?”

  “After you married Richard, I went off to college at San Jose State University. I dated a little, but then I met a great girl named Mary in my junior year. We dated for quite awhile, and I asked her to marry me during the last semester of our senior year. We both graduated and the wedding was planned for the beginning of September. But two weeks after we finished school she was killed in a car accident.”

  “Oh, Alex. Oh, Alex, I’m so sorry.”

  “Thanks, it was hard, but over time I worked through it. I entered the police academy in San Jose and became a cop. I poured myself into the job to help get over my grief. A couple of years ago I decided to come back to Hollister. I missed the small town life. I’ve dated a little since coming back, but there was never any spark with those girls.”

  “Spark?”

  “Yeah, I had spark with Mary. I had it with you, too, from the very first day.”

  “You felt a spark with me? All those years ago?”

  “Yes, all those years ago. I still do.” Alex watched the reflection of the candlelight dance in Eva’s eyes, and he reached across the table and gently took her hand in his. At his touch, a warm sensation radiated from her hand up her arm, then to the rest of her body.

  “Oh, man, Eva, I had such a crush on you,” he said, grinning at her.

  “Are you kidding me?” She was surprised to hear he had had feelings for her even when they were in junior high. “I was the one who had a huge crush on you.”

  The realization of their mutual feelings suddenly hit them both, and they had a good laugh about it. From that point on, the conversation flowed freely and easily. The spark had become an ember, and their attraction to one another fanned the flame.

  * * * *

  While living in the cottage, Eva received a letter from the German woman for whom Richard had professed his love. The letter read:

  “Dear Eva,

  You don’t know me, but I am the woman Richard is in love with in Germany.

  He told me he wants a divorce from you so he can marry me. We are very much in love.

  Please give him the divorce so he can marry me.

  Greta”

  Eva thought this woman had a lot of nerve. If she wanted Richard, Eva felt she should know what she was getting herself into. She promptly wrote back to Greta:

  “Greta,

  You can have my husband. I’m done with him. But, you should know that he does have

  2 small children that he’s responsible to support until they turn 18.

  Eva, the mother of Richard’s children”

  A few weeks later, Eva received a letter from Richard, who was still in Germany, saying that he had made a mistake and wanted her to forgive him. He realized, he wrote, that it was Eva he loved, not Greta, and that he wanted her back. Greta, the letter went on to say, was not the woman he thought she was. She had left him and run off with another American soldier.

  That was it. Eva knew it was time to move forward with filing for divorce. She met with a divorce lawyer to get the process moving. She needed to protect herself and her children. However, she found out from the attorney that she could not divorce Richard until he returned to the United States.

  She couldn’t believe this was happening. As she sat in the leather chair in her attorney’s office, her body violently reacted to the news. At first, she felt sick, like she was going to throw up. Her head started to pound.

  “Are you all right?” the lawyer asked with concern. He could see the dramatic change in her countenance.

  Eva was beyond disappointed. Words could not describe the depth of her despair. She needed to cut Richard off like a gangrenous limb. But he was outside of her reach at the moment. She was forced to be patient and wait for the right opportunity.

  “I will be,” she said as she gathered up her purse and coat and walked out. What she needed now was yet another plan.

  Numerous thoughts swirled around in her head as she drove home. She knew she needed the child support from Richard to help cover their living expenses after the divorce, especially if she hoped to start a new life. She couldn’t earn enough on her own. Besides, the kids were his responsibility, too. If he wanted to play around with other women, fine, but he would pay to support his children.

  Rory’s and Angie’s sweet little faces danced in her mind. Eva knew she needed to focus on what was in their best interest. It was on her shoulders alone to build a new life for them, to give them a childhood that would be better than what she had known. What she had to do was bide her time until she received confirmation that Richard was back on U.S. soil.

  A few months later, Eva got another letter from Richard.

  “Dear Eva,

  I miss you all so much. I’m back at Fort Ord now, and I want to come and see you and the kids.

  Write me back and tell me when I can come. I love you.

  Richard”

  With a satisfied grin, Eva quickly shot off her response to him:

  “Richard,

  I do NOT want to see you ever again. I don’t want you to come and visit the children either. They are better off without you – we all are. By the way, divorce papers are on their way to you.

  Eva”

  Eva sighed with relief. She was finally free of her no-good husband and able to pursue true love and happiness. This time, though, decided she would take her time.

  She and Alex had gone on a few more dates while she waited for her final divorce decree, mostly opportunities to talk and get to know each other again. Eva could sense he was falling in love with her, and her affection for him was growing, too; but she wasn’t ready to jump into anything yet. She enjoyed the long walks in the country with him and the quiet dinners they shared, but she remained guarded until the divorce was final.

  With the divorce behind her and no longer bound to Richard, Eva was eager to let Alex know her better. She wanted to share with him what her life was like growing up, how she escaped that life, and what she wanted for her future and her children’s future. She had always been rather tight-lipped about the harsh conditions in which s
he had grown up. But now, she had come to the place where she was willing to be vulnerable and open up to him.

  One afternoon, Alex took Eva on a picnic in Piedmont Park. He brought the blanket and drinks, and she had packed a picnic basket with sandwiches and fresh fruit. She even slyly included a couple of cold bean burritos in the basket, for old time’s sake.

  “This looks like a nice place,” Eva said, pointing to a flat, shady spot under a mature oak tree.

  They spread out the blanket, set the basket down, and each found a comfortable place to sit. Eva set out the paper plates and cups and then dug around in the basket for the napkins.

  “Here,” Alex said, “let me help you get the food out.”

  He pulled out the sandwiches and the bag of bananas and grapes, then he noticed there was something else in the bottom of the basket. It was a dish towel folded into a neat little square, tied with twine, which looked oddly familiar to him.

  “What’s this?” he said, raising one eyebrow as he held the little bundle up to Eva.

  “It’s a surprise. Open it.”

  Alex looked at her suspiciously, then looked down at the mysterious fabric-covered packet in his hand. He untied the twine and let the cloth fall open. There sat two cold bean burritos. He looked puzzled for a moment, his brows knit together and his head cocked to one side. Then a huge grin spread across his face and his eyes lit up. He realized what those burritos meant.

  “Oh, Eva…this is great!” he said with a chuckle.

  “I wasn’t sure you’d remember.”

  “Me? Not remember? How could I forget the day we met?”

  Eva was pleased that Alex understood what the burritos symbolized. They were starting over, getting reacquainted as if they were back at the beginning.

  “I’ll swap you half of my sandwich for one of your burritos,” Alex said, reminding her of that first day.

  “You really want a cold bean burrito?” she asked jokingly.

  “Sure. I like Mexican food!”

  “Do you? Why?” she asked, as if she didn’t know.

  “ ’Cause I’m one-fourth Mexican,” he said proudly. “My dad’s mom was Mexican. She passed away last year, but she used to make fresh tortillas and tamales and all kinds of good stuff.”

  “Oh, Alex, I’m sorry. I didn’t know your grandmother passed away,” Eva told him. She was so touched by him losing his beloved grandmother that her eyes started to glisten with tears.

  He reached out and put his strong hand gently on hers. “It’s okay. She lived a good, long life. No regrets. My grandpa loved her for over fifty years, and they had five children together.”

  He gave her a little smile to reassure her that it really was all right.

  “Wow, he loved her for over fifty years. I can’t even imagine that kind of life.” Those tears that were so near the surface began to spill over. She was embarrassed by them. She took a napkin and stood up, turning away to hide them.

  Alex quickly got to his feet, too, and lightly grabbed hold of her forearm.

  “I don’t understand, Eva. Why does that make you cry?”

  “I don’t know,” she replied, shaking her head slightly. Alex was perplexed. He couldn’t see why his grandmother’s death would cause Eva to react like that.

  “Come on,” Alex said, as he took Eva’s hand. “Let’s go sit on that bench over there,” he offered, noticing a park bench less than ten feet away. He led her over to it and they sat down.

  “Talk to me, I don’t understand,” he said again, holding her hand in his.

  “You must’ve figured out that Mama and Carlos didn’t have a good marriage, with her divorcing him and then you having to arrest him for drunkenness and trying to break into her house.”

  “Yeah, I assumed things weren’t great between them. But, how bad was it?” he asked, not realizing he had opened a flood gate.

  Even though Eva hated talking about her harsh and abusive life, she was ready to open up to Alex and let him in all the way. Starting her story from as far back as she could remember as a small child, she spilled out all the horrible and painful details of her life.

  He tried to take it all in, but the misery and brutality of it was overwhelming to him. He had never known anyone who had endured the things Eva and Sofía had. Alex was a man with a profound sense of right and wrong, and he couldn’t understand how Carlos was allowed to get away with abusing his family all those years.

  Just listening to Eva’s stories about her family – enduring the violence, fighting to go to school, breaking free of her abusive life and rescuing her mother – made Alex’s feelings for Eva grow even stronger. He wanted to protect her so no one would ever hurt her again.

  “I’m so sorry, Eva.” He put his arms around her and pulled her in. Resting her head against his chest, she breathed in his scent, which smelled of strength and love. She dried her tears and rested in his arms for a few moments. Her body relaxed against his. She felt safe.

  What Alex felt was a twinge of guilt. He had his arms around Eva, trying to comfort her. But holding her against him made him want her, it made his whole body ache for her. She wanted to take things slowly, she had told him, but he didn’t know how long he could hold back his passion for her.

  * * * *

  Eva could sense her relationship with Alex growing deeper, their feelings for each other growing stronger. But she wanted to be especially careful not to let her children get too attached to Alex. If things didn’t work out between them, she didn’t want her children hurt. At this point, she only told them that Alex was a good friend.

  But keeping them from getting attached was impossible to do, because he was crazy about them. And the feeling was mutual. They loved the attention he gave them, and he was often willing to play with them in the yard before he went to work in the evenings.

  One night, after a family dinner at Grandma Sofía’s house, Alex and Eva stole a few minutes for themselves and sat on the front porch talking. It was a mild spring evening, and the sky was clear and studded with stars and a bright, full moon. There was a warm glow from the living room lamps shining through the screen door, illuminating the porch. The air was filled with the scent of jasmine that Sofía had planted in the yard. Alex slipped an arm around Eva and pulled her in close to him.

  “Eva, I love you.”

  Eva turned her body to look him in his eyes, and she cupped his face in her hands. She gazed at him and could see he unquestionably meant what he said, which warmed her down to her toes.

  “Alex Messina, it seems like I have been waiting my whole life to hear you say that. What took you so long?”

  He looked a bit surprised at her response, after all it was her that wanted to take things slowly. Then he gave her a little smile, pleased at her reply. He enveloped her with both arms and held her tenderly. Her arms slipped around his neck. His face was close to hers and their lips almost touched. Alex studied her face for a moment, then passionately pressed his lips to hers. She had never been kissed like that before – purely, deeply, totally.

  When she was good and kissed, he slid off the step and onto one knee. Her heart started to beat wildly as she sensed what was about to happen.

  “Eva, I love you with my whole heart. I love you, and I love your kids. Will you marry me?”

  “Yes, we will! We will!” Rory and Angie squealed in unison. They were standing just inside the screen door and had watched the proposal.

  Alex and Eva were so surprised by them that they burst out laughing. Rory and Angie opened the screen door and ran out to join them. They were all hugging and laughing on the front steps. Sofía heard the laughter from inside and came to the door.

  “What’s all the noise out there?” she asked.

  “We’re getting married!” Angie announced.

  Chapter 23: Mama Saved Them All

  Eva and Alex were over the moon for each other, happily planning their wedding. Eva was thrilled to have Alex back in her life. He made her feel loved, cared for, and
protected. She never had that before. Neither had Sofía.

  One evening, Alex was at Sofía’s house for dinner, and he and Eva were going over some of the details of their wedding. It was going to be a small family affair, but Eva wanted it to be memorable. Trying to blend her Mexican family and his Italian family shouldn’t be too hard, she thought.

  She had spoken to Alex’s mother, Lucia, and she and some of the women in her family were happy to make their traditional Italian dishes for the reception. Sofía and Lydia, and some of their friends, were already planning to make the Mexican food. But other details still needed to be discussed and decided on.

  It was getting late, so all the children had already been put to bed at Grandma Sofía’s house, except for Hector, a teenager, who was staying overnight with friends. Eva and her mother planned to sit around the kitchen table and talk more about the wedding plans as soon as Alex left to work his ten o’clock shift. Eva walked Alex to the door, and they paused for a moment.

  “I wish I didn’t have to go,” Alex told her as he took her hand and kissed it gently.

  “I wish you didn’t either, but I’ll see you tomorrow.” She pushed herself up on her tip-toes, smoothed out the collar of his uniform, and threw her arms around his neck. He lovingly responded by putting his arms around her. She gave him a long, deep kiss good-bye.

  “Please be careful out there,” she reminded him as they released their hold on each other.

  “I will, I will. Don’t worry so much. I’ll see you tomorrow,” he promised as he walked out the door.

  Eva went back to the kitchen table and continued talking with her mother about the guest list and decorating ideas. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the front door.

  “Oh, it’s probably Alex,” Eva assumed. “He must’ve forgotten something.”

  She got up from her chair and started for the door. “Why don’t you pour us some coffee, Mama? It should be ready by now. I’ll be right back.”