“Why would you compare me to him?” he asked softly, his breath fanning my ear. The hurt in his voice made my own chest squeeze.
“Because he said the same thing and it didn’t stop me then either.”
His grip dropped from my arm and I started for the table again. My heart hammered out of control, like a train going too fast, I was worried I might derail.
“I will be different,” Aaron called out. The Shifters in the room held their breath and they weren’t the only ones. “I may not be the first to go after you, Selena Foster, but I vow here before my people that I will be the last.”
Warmth ignited in my chest, but I wouldn’t smile. I wouldn’t let him off that easily…but I wouldn’t leave it there either.
I paused at the table and glanced over my shoulder. He stood there by himself, beneath the chandelier. His eyes golden and hopeful.
“We’ll see,” I answered.
When I took my seat, Keyla was grinning like a fool and Amber waggled her eyebrows.
“Is it always that hot between you two?” Amber whispered across the table.
“Yes,” Violet said smugly.
“Put a sock in it,” I said back.
No one said anything about my lack of a response as dinner was served.
Chapter 21
With the end of the week came another temperature drop as we rolled into late November. Wind swept across the residence like a vengeful spirit, howling well into the night. The panes of glass rattled viciously in their sockets, waiting for a gust to come along that was just strong enough to shatter them into oblivion.
Sometimes I felt like these windows, just waiting for something to happen. Someone to come along and destroy the progress I have made. Something that can send me right over the cliff where I teetered back and forth. The climb out may have been hell, but it was staying out that proved ever more difficult.
But every day I talked myself away from the ledge one more inch.
It was enough. For now.
Overlooking the lake, I found it easiest to let my thoughts wander and not focus too much on the rippling surface of the icy waters. Anything was better than that. The sky. The wind. The whispering of leaves behind me and howls in the far off distance.
These things were my arsenal. They were the tools I used to build a tolerance, and after standing in the same spot for twenty-one minutes and thirteen seconds—the longest I had to date—the edges of my vision began to drift and curl inward.
I turned my back on the shore without any delay. While coming here was helping, it was best not to push it. Once the shadows appeared, voices were never far behind them, and Keyla didn’t need to see that. No one did.
My feet carried me far and fast down the winding trail through the forest. When I focused, I could hear as far back as camp, but out here was as close to quiet as it ever got, until I ran into Keyla that was. Slowly but surely, she’d been making it farther down the trail as I built up a tolerance to the lake.
“Ah man! Why do you have to be so fast? Huh? You couldn’t let me make it there once?” she griped as soon as I came into sight.
“Look at it this way, when you finally do make it to the lake, you’ll know I didn’t go easy on you,” I said. She rolled her eyes and scoffed.
“Oh puh-lease, I just want to know how you’re so fast. Supes are never as fast as Shifters, but I bet you could outrun Aaron without trying.”
Because I’m not just a Supernatural, I wanted to say. But how do you tell a thirteen-year-old that you’re a demon? You don’t.
“Your brother is my signasti. It stands to reason that I am above average,” I said. My breath came slow and steady while my heart thundered in my chest.
“You never talk about him,” Keyla started. “Not that he talks about you…but you guys are weird. Like, he clearly cares and you kind of do, but you’re not like any of the other signasti couples I’ve met.”
Did Keyla know she was astute? Did she realize she hit a nerve that I so carefully tried to hide from the rest of the world?
I glanced sideways at her flush cheeks and bright eyes. Sneaky as she liked to be, I don’t think she really saw or understood how strange my relationship with Aaron was.
“Your brother and I…we had a rough start at things. I didn’t know who he was, and he didn’t tell me for a long time. It’s complicated,” I said carefully. There was a fine line to straddle in what I told Keyla. On one hand, she wasn’t that much younger than me, but clearly more sheltered. On the other hand, Aaron and I were in a strange place right now. I still didn’t know how I felt about the bond or whether I wanted to complete it, and something told me she wouldn’t understand if I told her that.
“Yeah, but it’s not like you’re the first Shifter-Supe pairing. My parents started off worse than you and Aaron, and clearly they got over it or I wouldn’t be here to grace you with my beautiful face,” Keyla said. I snorted, elbowing her in the ribs.
“You sound like my sister,” I groaned.
She really did. Some strange mix between Amber and Alexandra, with twice the confidence of either.
“I mean, we kind of are like sisters, aren’t we? If you think about it, the signasti bond is deeper than marriage. You guys are literally soul mates, and if you got married, I’d be your sister-in-law at the very least…” she trailed off, glancing sideways at me. “Why do you look like that?” she asked defensively.
“Like what?” I swallowed, my breathing coming out much heavier and it had nothing to do with our pace.
“Like you’re going to run,” she whispered, coming to a stop. I slowed down in front of her a few feet away.
“In case you hadn’t noticed, we were running.”
It was a poor attempt at a joke, and Keyla didn’t seem to buy it. The younger girl stood steady with her arms folded over her chest. The fire in her gold eyes was nearly tangible and just as intense as the gaze her brother leveled me with.
“Are you planning on leaving? Because if you are, I need to know right—”
“I’m not leaving, Keyla. At least not anytime soon,” I replied in a grave voice. She stared at me with her mouth half-open before recovering.
“Well then, what is it? Do you not want me as a sister? I mean, I get that I’m kinda loud and the other Shifters don’t care for me very much, but you don’t like them, so I didn’t think it would matter—”
“It’s not you, Keyla.”
“Then what is it? Did something happen with Aaron? I’ll kick his ass if it did—”
As much as I wanted to laugh at that, a stone had settled in me, weighing me down with the heavy burden of truth.
“Alexandra and I were…are triplets,” I said, cutting her off. She paused, her jaw falling open as a slow realization crept up on her. “We had another sister. Her name”—I broke off at the choking sound that threatened to escape from me—“her name was…Lily.”
The dam in my chest threatened to shatter, but the shadows hadn’t arrived yet. I took that as a good sign and continued.
“She was very dear to me, but when the Vampires came…I couldn’t protect her.” I took a couple of deep breaths, trying to break apart the lump that formed in my throat. “You don’t want to be my sister, Keyla. Bad things happen to those I care about.”
Keyla approached me with slow, steady steps and wrapped her arms around me.
“I don’t want to be protected. I just want you to stay,” she said in what was probably the closest to a whisper this girl could ever get. “Stay here with me and Aaron. Please.”
“I’m not planning on leaving.”
“Good.” She ended the hug abruptly and sprinted down the trail yelling, “Race you back!” I cocked an eyebrow at her rapidly disappearing back.
Seriously? And they thought I had mood swings?
I shook my head and took off after her, letting her get a good bit ahead before I ate up the distance right at the end. We crossed the tree line within six inches of each other, but instead of rubbi
ng it in my face as I expected, she whirled around on me.
“You let me win!” she accused, jabbing a finger into my chest. A wry smirk painted itself on my lips while I stared at her.
“Let you win? Didn’t I just tell you I was going to make you earn it?” I asked, stepping around her.
“Lies!” she declared. I cringed but resisted my urge to cover my ears. “You’re a liar. I’m calling it here and now. Liar, liar, pants on—”
“Where is everyone?” I asked, stopping short on the edge of the training field. I’m not sure how I hadn’t noticed earlier, or maybe they’d left since then, but only a very small fraction were out practicing today—and that small fraction primarily consisted of my team.
“Off getting ready for the full moon party, of course,” Keyla said.
“Full moon party?” I asked.
“You’ve never been to one?” Keyla asked, gripping my arm with a steadfast strength. Goddamnit. I knew exactly where this was going. I should have kept my mouth shut.
“I just don’t get why you would have a full moon party when you don’t need the moon to shift,” I replied tersely, trying to avoid the question on her tongue.
“Ohmigawd, Lena—you have never been to a full moon party—we must correct this!” she declared, doing that thing where she started to speak very loudly and changing thought mid-sentence, letting her words run together.
“Oh no, I think I will be quite fine. Thanks for offering,” I said, trying to weasel my way around her. She used the one hand she had locked around my arm to start dragging me across the field and used the other to put two fingers to her lips, letting out a shrill whistle.
Every Shifter and Supe stopped in their tracks looking to the young girl who may not have the power of an Alpha behind her, but damn did she have the personality.
“Brother! O’ Brother! Where art thou?” she started yelling at the top of her lungs. I put my foot down, literally, stomping once and it planted six inches through the dirt. My body went ramrod straight, refusing to yield while Keyla continued tugging on me.
“What the—”
“Come to train with us, Selena?” Aaron asked, strolling up. He was shirtless in the early afternoon sun and glistening with sweat.
“Uh—no. Thanks, but no thanks,” I said, declining his offer for the third time this week. Keyla wheeled on me.
“Wait a second—you can fight?” she squeaked. I clapped my hands over my ears as both my demon and I winced in pain.
“She can do a lot more than just fight,” Alexandra scoffed, coming up beside Aaron. The other Shifters in the yard perked their heads up toward us and I bristled instantly, sending glares at both of them.
“Keyla and I were just leaving,” I said, sending a lethal look her way. Not that it perturbed her in the slightest.
“Oh, no we aren’t. I want to see you in action,” she pushed. It wasn’t a whine, but I knew it would continue that way if this kept up.
“Too bad. I’m not in the mood,” I snapped at her. She glared shrewdly at me.
“What? Are you too scared? Afraid my brother might kick your ass?” she goaded.
Oh child. If only she were doing it half as good as she hoped. My demon thought her just as amusing, more like a hissing kitten than a grown lioness.
I tossed my head back and let out a quick caustic laugh.
“Keyla, I don’t think you realize the number of times I’ve kicked your brother’s ass,” I said and chuckled to myself. Behind her, Aaron’s eyes flashed gold, a not so subtle reminder to me that there was more to him than what I always saw.
“Then prove it,” Kayla argued. “I’ll even make you a deal,” she continued. Her eyes took on that bronze fire they did when she got excited.
“Oh, will you now?” I asked, smirking at her.
“If you fight him and win, I won’t make you go to the full moon party.” Her face lit up like a thousand-watt bulb. She was weighing my dislike of people against what she thought was a slight pacifistic tendency. If only that were true.
“I’m not seeing how there’s a win in this for me. Either way, you get me to fight when I can just decline to do either.” I shrugged at her, stepping out of the hole I’d created. They all must have only just noticed it because their eyes flicked down simultaneously to where my foot had been as I walked away.
“Lena!” she wailed. Not crying, but so fucking loud she knew I would stop.
“Don’t even go there. I don’t appreciate you trying to manipulate me.” She lowered her eyes, taking all of one second to at least look ashamed.
“You’re right. I’m sorry,” she said. “Will you go to the full moon party with me? We don’t have to stay forever, I just don’t want to go alone.”
Her golden eyes pleaded with me and my demon tugged at my heart strings. She wanted to go with the girl and was more than curious about the party. This was all so new to us together.
“Fine. But I get to leave when I want to leave and no whining about it,” I said.
“Deal.”
She flashed me a Cheshire smile and winked, sauntering past me towards the residence.
Why did it feel like I’d just been played?
“Because you were,” Violet snorted. I rolled my eyes and continued on, pretending to be completely unaffected by the Shifter Heir I knew was watching me.
Chapter 22
The chill of twilight swept over me. With the skies painted a dark indigo and the last speck of sunlight disappearing on the horizon, the wind went from cold to downright frigid. I tugged my leather jacket closer, digging my hands into the faux-fur lined pockets.
“Hurry up, Lena. We’re almost there,” Keyla yelled. She grabbed my hand to pull me past the tree line where a bonfire raged. The glowing red-gold embers drew my attention immediately. “I’m going to find drinks. I’ll be right back!” Keyla called, quite literally abandoning me to the wolves while she disappeared into the crowd.
I took a few mesmerized steps towards the fire. My demon was completely enthralled. The flames danced and swayed in the unforgiving winds. Fluid but graceful. Beautiful in the most lethal of ways. If a single ember traveled too far, too fast, the entire forest would be set ablaze. Of course, that wasn’t possible with Alexandra here.
My sister sat on the log closest to the fire. In one hand, she clutched a Styrofoam cup filled with a steaming liquid. Her other moved effortlessly as she twisted and twirled her fingers. The fire followed her command, forming flaming women. Dancers that sashayed and twirled, one even leapt from the fire onto her palm.
The display wasn’t for me, and it wasn’t for the other Shifters. It was for the girl sitting beside her. Tori’s golden hair was longer than I’d ever seen it, blowing behind her in wild strands. A bright smile lit her face as she looked at my sister and the truth of it hit me.
Does Alexandra return her affections? Does she see the way Tori looks at her?
It wasn’t my business, but I found myself wondering.
“They’re quite the pair, aren’t they?”
I jumped at the sudden sound of Blair’s voice beside me. Her pale skin was tinged pink from where the wind whipped against it, but not a single strand of her braid was out of place.
“Yes, they are.”
“Amber and I have a running bet on who will realize it first,” she mused. I chuckled under my breath.
“Alexandra will, but she won’t act first.”
From this angle, I couldn’t see my sister’s face clearly, but I knew her well enough to guess that she already knew. You didn’t live with sisters for seventeen years and not learn to read body language. You didn’t date a boy who couldn’t love you, never having him look at you the way you longed for, and then be blind to the way that Tori looked at her every day. Yeah, she knew.
“What makes you say that?” Blair asked.
“She’s more perceptive than anyone gives her credit for, but she also worries too much about what people think. Tori doesn’t give a damn. Men.
Women. She loves who she loves,” I said, running a hand through my windblown hair.
“You sound like you envy them,” Blair replied.
If it were anyone else, I think that statement would have sounded judgmental. I had a signasti, after all, and if you listened to Keyla, you would think that’s some kind of fabled love that could overcome anything. Blair said it with the same tone that she used to talk about the weather.
“I don’t envy them for love. All I ever wanted was for Alexandra to find happiness…” I trailed off, wondering if I should really put words to the truth that bothered me more than I let anyone know. “I envy their ability to choose.”
My cousin didn’t act surprised in the slightest. She only nodded and looked to the sky. Like it held answers that neither she nor I could see.
“I used to feel the same,” she started. “In the beginning. I thought I would never get him out of my mind. That I would always remember our time together and think that because he was bound to my soul, that meant he owned my heart too. But that wasn’t the case. It took me seeing him again to realize it.”
I frowned, playing that over in my mind a second time, and then a third. Was she saying what I think she was saying…
“You have a signasti?” I asked. It was hardly more than a whisper.
“I do,” she nodded. Her eyes were lost. Wistful. “We met when I was a freshman at Daizlei, and he was a senior. I didn’t know who he was, only that I was drawn to him in a way I wasn’t with anyone before and haven’t been with anyone since. At the time, I thought it was normal. I was barely fifteen, after all.” She paused, smiling to herself at a memory, but that smile fell and I knew without asking that her love at first sight went sour.
“What happened?” I asked softly. She laughed, and it was a cold, emotionless sound that didn’t belong on her lips.
“What always happens. Anastasia.”
My mouth fell open as a terrifying realization swept over me.
“Alec is your signasti?” I asked, being careful not to utter it any louder than a whisper. The wind and fire may rage, but that same wind could sweep my words to unwanted ears.
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