Off the Cuff

by Carson Kressley

  Think of a sandwich: If the outer fabric the suit jacket is made of is the top piece of bread, and the inner lining is the bottom piece of bread, the interlining is the ham and cheese sewn in between—except it’s hidden away where you won’t be able to see it. But you can feel for it and you’ll know it’s there. Hopefully.

  A cheap suit may not have an interlining at all, or if it does have one, it might be bad quality, made of plastic or other synthetic materials that aren’t going to breathe and last.

  Keep in mind that there is something known as an unconstructed suit, which won’t have an interlining or shoulder pads, and might not even have a regular lining. This is a “look,” but I highly recommend you step away. Unconstructed suits have a very easy breezy “Yanni at the Acropolis” flair. The unconstructed sport coat, on the other hand, can be a great, easy, and relaxed look. (See “Sport Coats,” page tk.)

  DETAIL #4 Patterns

  If the suit you’re considering has a pattern like a tattersall or glen plaid, a houndstooth, a herringbone, or a Pound Puppies print—no, scratch that last one—you should check to make sure all the patterns match up where the seams meet. It’s just like the repeat of wallpaper—the pattern should be seamless. If the pattern doesn’t match up, that’s the sign of a suit that’s less than top shelf.

  DETAIL #5 The Pockets

  Suit jacket pockets should be lined and functional. They should also be actually there and not just an optical illusion. Sometimes a cheap suit will just have the flap on the outside, but no actual pocket. And that’s quite a surprise when you go to slip in your Tic Tacs!

  On a good quality suit, you’ll need to cut the jacket pockets open, preferably with a nail scissor or something similar. Do not rip them open or use a chainsaw. Your tailor can do this for you while you’re having your suit tailored.

  Now that we’ve got your suit jacket under control, next come the pants. To cuff or not to cuff, that is the question. Cuffs really don’t serve a purpose anymore. Once upon a time, when you were traipsing around on muddy streets in the London or New York of olden days, you would just roll your pants up a little bit to protect them. When more people began wearing suits as the business uniform, this impromptu cuff was incorporated as a standard feature of the suit. In today’s modern world of clean sidewalks and efficient municipal waste systems, those cuffs are obsolete, unless you live in Walnut Grove. In which case I suggest you head over to Doc Baker’s and get some of that new drug everyone’s talking about. I think they call it “aspirin”??

  Cuffs are strictly a matter of personal taste. For a traditional American- or English-cut suit, I like them. They look finished. They belong there. They’re a matter of tradition, particularly a one-and-a-quarter- or one-and-a-half-inch cuff. Suit pants can be a longer than dress pants, with more of a break. This means that more fabric can be pooling when you’re standing upright. The goal is to avoid showing a lot of ankle of calf when you’re seated in a suit. The less leg showing, the more elegant, and a suit is obviously more elegant than dress pants.

  If the pants have pleats—and yes, for some very traditional suits I can still endorse a pleat—they should definitely have cuffs as well. But for cleaner, more modern suits, especially Italian suits, I like a flat-front pant. And if pants have a flat-front, they shouldn’t have cuffs. It just looks more clean and sophisticated. Cuffed flat-front pants look a little too Mickey Rooney—or like you should be out selling newspapers with Oliver Twist.

  BLAZERS OR SPORT COATS

  If you’re not a suit wearer, but you have the occasion to get dressed up now and again for a dinner date or a party, you should have a couple of good blazers in your wardrobe.

  Blazers are super, super versatile. You can wear a blazer with anything. Wear it with jeans. Dress it up with tweed pants. Wear it with a dress shirt. Wear it with culottes. Wear it with a micromini. Wear it with lederhosen! Okay, maybe not those last few.

  For your first blazer, I recommend a navy blue, lightweight wool for all seasons—even summer. Nothing looks cooler or more classically chic than a blue blazer, a pink oxford and a pair of khakis. You can dress it up with a fun pocket square if you don’t want to wear a tie.

  Just like a good suit, a classic blue blazer is an investment. You’re going to have it forever. You can buy a proper blue blazer when you’re twenty and have it through your Viagra years. Ah, Viagra. Ain’t life grand?

  A blue blazer can have plain horn buttons or traditional brass ones, either plain or with a monogram. Plain horn buttons are more versatile, but I love the tradition and the heritage of the brass. If you’re buying good quality, the buttons should be subtle, not super shiny and garish.

  Try to think outside the box with your blue blazer. It’s very European to wear a sport coat with all sorts of things, for all seasons, all times of day, and all occasions. Think about all the many ways you can dress it up: with a sweater, with a tie, with a dress shirt. Or dress it down with jeans or cargo pants. You can do so many things with it. It slices, it dices, it cubes, it juliennes your favorite vegetables—just like the Ginsu!

  For fall and winter, you should have a tweed blazer. This one will be rugged but warm and is always stylish. And don’t think that you can only pair a tweed blazer with an oxford shirt and a pipe. Try wearing it in an updated way, with a skinny cashmere sweater underneath or a rock-and-roll T-shirt. Wear it with jeans—it looks great.

  If you want to be nutty, you can invest in a corduroy blazer as well. I have a certain fetish for elbow patches that stems from having seen Ryan O’Neal in Love Story a few too many times. But that’s another book ... in which I play the role of Ali MacGraw. Sigh.

  ONE CARDINAL RULE : You don’t want to wear pants and a sport coat that try to make it look like you’re wearing a suit. You’re not fooling anyone. Don’t match your slacks to your blazer; you’ll look like you work at Subway. Avoid quirky colors. It’s not the place to get quirky. (Century 21 agents exempted.) Oh, and do me a favor and make sure your blazers fit, okay? They shouldn’t be like sacks (the bags, not the store).

  TIES AND POCKET SQUARES

  There is nothing that can kill a great outfit, even if it’s a stunning handmade suit, like a bad tie. A lot of guys see ties as an afterthought, but ties are so important. If you are going to wear one, especially in this day and age when nobody’s wearing them—it better be sensational.

  You really need to take care with your ties and make sure that they’re good-looking and smart, but ties can also be fun. They can give a hint of your personality, or make a gentle nod to something that you enjoy, like sailboats or vintage cars. Just don’t take that too far. You don’t want to get a tie that has toy trucks all over it, or Christmas trees that light up.

  My Life in Ties

  In 1991, right after college graduation, I got my first job and moved to New York. And my very first winter in the big city, I sold neckwear at Saks Fifth Avenue over the holidays.

  Neckwear is the total bottom rung for men’s clothing. It’s the one place where all people who don’t know what they want come to buy a gift. They say, “I just don’t know. I’ll get him a tie!” It’s so lame. But I’m sure I touched many lives. I can just see them even now, in some tony apartment on the Upper East Side, opening that gift box to find hot pink whales on a green cotton background. And some guy in a tweed blazer would say, “Thanks for the tie, Joan. Where’d you find this one?” And she would answer, “This cute little blond guy picked it out for me at Saks!” I really got a sense of satisfaction from helping people find themselves through clothes. That has always been my thing, and I really believe that much of it started right there, in the neckwear department of Saks. Now I’m a little verklempt, are you? It was a happy, magical time.

  People ask how to find a good tie, but it’s kind of like when you see a puppy at the animal shelter: when it’s the right one, you’ll know it. One very simple thing to keep in mind is that ties should always be made of silk. There’s one slight exception: very, ve
ry English ties for fall are sometimes made of wool challis. They’re very sophisticated, but they’re not easy to find and you might not even come across them. I also love knit ties, very Alex P. Keaton, but very chic when done tone-on-tone with a sophisticated suit. But they’re not for everybody.

  A good practice when tie shopping is to give the tie a good feel. A good tie will have an inner construction that is actually tangible. If you took it apart, there would be something like a piece of mesh or screen that gives it some body and structure. A bad tie is wimpy and soft. If you make a quick knot, you’ll see it won’t hold a dimple, which should warn you that your dimple is going to flatten out when you wear it. Major chubby killer!

  With so many tie variations out there, it would be impossible to make any lists of ties you must own or tell you how to pick patterns. Just remember that ties are, once again, a great place to keep it simple. The classic rep tie, which often has a regimental stripe, can be very bright and preppy or quite subdued and elegant. You can never go wrong with a repp tie. Practically as effective as an Ivy League education for a mere fraction of the cost!

  And finally, a lot of guys don’t realize that certain ties relate to certain seasons. Muted rusts, gold, rich reds, and wool ties lend themselves much more to fall and winter. A lime green-and-navy rep tie paired with a pink oxford would be much more appropriate for spring and summer.

  What Color Is Your Pocket Square?

  Forget your parachute. The burning question these days is “What color is your pocket square?” Pocket squares really just add that extra little tszuj to an outfit, especially if you’re wearing a blazer and you’re not wearing a tie. You can look nekkid without it. REMEMBER : You always want to look distinguished and ahead of the pack. As far as I’m concerned, you might as well not even wear pants if you’re not wearing a pocket square.

  Pocket squares should be made of silk—or cotton for summer—but silk is always best. Cotton may look a little too dicey. And for heaven’s sake, do not blow your nose in them. It’s not a hankie or a snot rag, people. Please, do yourself a favor and grab a Puffs instead.

  As easy way to pick a pocket square is to remember it should pull out one color of an item you’re wearing—a stripe or pattern. If you’re wearing a blue blazer and a pale blue-and-white striped shirt, for instance, maybe your pocket square would be pale blue.

  When it comes to folding the pocket square, I like them to be natural looking. I don’t like when it’s all neatly folded. It’s not origami. Those three pointy triangles you sometimes see poking out of a local news anchor’s jacket? Way too fussy, in my opinion. Notice that he’s also wearing a pinky ring and a gold rope chain bracelet Capice?

  You just want to lay your pocket square flat on a table. Pinch right in the middle between your thumb and forefinger and let it hang naturally—it will sort of look like a little ghost. Make a circle with the thumb and forefinger of your other hand, and draw the “ghost” through. Flip it over, fold it in half and stick it in the pocket. You should have a little bit of the rounded front part and a little bit of the tail sticking out. It’s an art form, so practice makes perfect.

  THE FINISHED SUIT LOOK: PULLING IT ALL TOGETHER

  Oooh, that sounds naughty, doesn’t it? That’s bringing back Boy Scout jamboree memories, people. In tents. I mean intense.

  Anyway, I know you’re confused. You’ve got a great classic suit. You have great shirts. You have some good ties and pocket squares. Now what? Three little words, peanut! Color, pattern, and scale. You can harmonize everything through just those three things. It’s just like making a martini. All it takes is finesse, practice, and good credit.

  Your Friend, The Tailor

  Your neighborhood tailor should become one of your best friends. The tailor is an important professional, just like your doctor, but the licensing requirements are not quite as stringent. Anyone can hang up a shingle and call him or herself a tailor. You have to find the good ones by word of mouth. So if you move to a new area, you need to ask friends, get recommendations, or you need to go and test tailors out by having a shirt altered or pants cuffed. Don’t take your new expensive suit to a brand-new tailor. If you’re buying a suit, and the store doesn’t do its own tailoring, ask the salesperson who they recommend. Generally this is a great way to find a reliable tailor.

  Let’s start, for example, with a charcoal gray suit. Add one accent color in the dress shirt like pink, light blue, or lavender. (White is so boring!) The shirt could also have pattern, like a small gridlike windowpane, a faint herringbone, a tone-on-tone design, or it could be a stripe.

  The tie adds pattern and dimension. When mixing patterns, it’s all about complementary scale. The scale of the tie pattern should be bolder than the scale of the shirt pattern and should pick up color references from both the suit (charcoal gray) and the shirt (lavender, pink, or blue). It’s as easy as e = mc2. You do the math! Now just add a white pocket square for a dash of formality, or choose one that coordinates with—but doesn’t match—the necktie. It’s a little too “I work at Avis” when it all matches.

  Suits and Ties

  Pastel suits.They’ve gone the way of Miami Vice and Don Johnson’s career

  Shiny suits. You never want to look like a walking baked potato.

  Leisure suits. It’s an oxymoron, people.

  Double breasted blue blazers with anchors on the buttons. You are not the captain of the Good Ship Lollipop. Your blue blazer should be single breasted.

  Bow ties with suits. Just a little too Orville Redenbacher.

  Cravats and ascots. Unless you’re trying out for the part of Thurston Howell III or are a member of a royal imperial court.

  Novelty ties

  Bolo ties

  CHAPTER 6

  It’s a Wrap JACKETS, SCARVES, GLOVES, AND HATS

  YOUR OUTERWEAR (OR A GIGANTIC ZIT, SEE CHAPTER NINE) IS THE FIRST THING PEOPLE SEE WHEN THEY MEET YOU, SO PAY attention. You could be wearing a barrel with suspenders underneath—hell, you could be naked underneath—but if you have a nice-looking jacket on, people are only going to say, “Heeeeey! Looking good!” On the flip side, an inappropriate jacket—like a casual barn coat over a beautiful custom-made suit—can shut you down like a bad Ferris wheel. You could be wearing the most gorgeous suit in the world, and if you throw on a bad coat, game over. It’s like putting t-tops and fuzzy dice on a Rolls. To make it even easier for you, I, your personal fashion life coach, will now tell you the seven coats I think you need to own. It’s that simple.

  1. A denim jacket. Why? Because it’s an American icon. A legend. It’s rugged, cool, and stylish. It’s James Dean. It adds a nice twist to your wardrobe, and you can wear it six months out of the year. If you’re a little dressed up and you throw the denim jacket on, instant cool. Plus—bonus, kids!—it’s affordable because it’s cotton: the fabric of our lives. The denim jacket is an amazing layering piece. It looks fantastic over a sweater or under a blazer. You’ve probably never done anything as crazy as wear a denim jacket under a

  blazer, but it works. Just trust me. Sometimes you need to try the unconventional and just see what it looks like. If you hate it, you can put your Cliff Huxtable collectible Coogi sweater back on, but you might be pleasantly surprised.

  Note to self (you, not me); You don’t want to pair a denim jacket with matching denim pants, or you’ll look like a denim-peddling ice cream man. But with just about everything else it looks fantastic.

  Just like we talked about with jeans, you want to avoid the fashion denim jacket and steer toward something like a classic Levi’s jacket. Anything that’s shiny, coated, or anything that’s been Be-Dazzled is to be avoided. And I know. I was addicted to Be-Dazzling for seven years. It’s the great enabler—worse than crack cocaine. I don’t even have any Be-Dazzled creations left to share. It’s like dumping all the booze down the drain when you get sober: You have to get rid of it all.

  Ah, but I digress. Back to your jean jacket. You should buy them basical
ly true to fit, maybe a smidge larger than you’d normally wear because you might want to layer with a sweater. The armholes should be high, and the jacket should button snugly in the front. People tend to buy denim jackets oversized, but that’s to be avoided, unless you want to look like an extra from Saved By the Bell or Sixteen Candles.