Guardian Angel: Callaghan Brothers, Book 5

by Abbie Zanders

  The women had commandeered the kitchen, so after being permitted to offer a brief hello, Kane was quickly ushered out and herded to the living room, where the males of the clan had gathered before the flat screen. He was quite sure he had never received quite so many grateful, relieved greetings. Clearly, they had already accepted Rebecca and were feeling protective of her themselves, though out of respect for Kane they would allow him to lead.

  In a matter of seconds he’d acknowledged everyone, except the one he was looking for.

  “She’s in the playroom,” Jake said quietly, clapping a brief hand on Kane’s shoulder as he passed by.

  Kane stood silently in the shadows of the doorway. There she was. Dressed in a long brown skirt and a soft beige sweater, her honey-gold hair was partially controlled with some sort of clip. She was smiling in that gentle way she had, but there was a sadness in her eyes, too, as she followed the progress of something out of his line of sight.

  Gales of childlike giggles and squeals met his ears. He leaned in a little farther and saw the source of the amusement. The huge, bear-like creature, standing nearly three feet tall at the shoulder, with a toddler on his back, laughing hysterically.

  “Uncle Kane!” Patrick squealed, making a beeline for him, followed immediately by Ryan (crawling). Riley, ever the princess, leaned down and spoke into the beast’s ear. The animal lowered his rear haunches, allowing her to slide down with far too much grace for one so young. Then she, too, joined her cousins in greeting him.

  Kane crouched down, accepting hugs from each of them.

  When he looked up again, the great monster had positioned itself in front of Rebecca, looking at Kane with mild interest as if he was simply the next attraction to command the attention of the little ones. Sitting, the top of the dog’s massive head nearly reached her chest. Her hand stroked behind his ears affectionately.

  She looked smaller, frailer somehow. Her skin was a bit paler, her cheeks a little less pink than he remembered. Her hair was shorter than the last time he had seen her, parted off center and draped silkily over the side of her face.

  “Hi,” Rebecca said tentatively, almost as if she was afraid. The dog – if, indeed, you could call it that – turned his head to look at her, then back at Kane. The lolling pink tongue was drawn in, the ears grew alert, his interest greater now that someone else had captured his mistress’s attention.

  “Hi,” he said.

  A long silence stretched between them, broken only by the sounds of the children, and more distant sounds from the game further down the hall. Rebecca shifted her weight slightly from one foot to the other, threading her hands through the beast’s fur like it was a lifeline. He’d never seen her anxious before – not in the jungle, not in the midst of a raging flood, and not when it had been only the two of them in a remote location deep in the mountains. Yet here, in his brother’s house, surrounded by friends and family for a Thanksgiving celebration, she was afraid. Of him.

  It was so inherently wrong it was difficult to grasp. No matter what, Rebecca should never feel uncomfortable around him. She was the only one who had ever not looked at him like he was the Iceman.

  He had been a fool. He had let himself believe that he was protecting her by pretending there was nothing between them, but now he knew the truth. Having her look at him like that hurt worse than any bullet he’d ever taken; any torture he’d ever endured.

  Maggie’s voice rang out from the kitchen, announcing that dinner was ready and inviting everyone into the dining room. Parents came for their kids, shooting the two of them looks but wisely refraining from comment, leaving Kane and Rebecca alone at opposite sides of the playroom.

  Rebecca bit her lip uncertainly, then took a step forward. The beast stood and mimicked her actions. She moved slowly, cautiously, her hand on the back of the dog for support. Her limp, though slight, was unmistakable. An icy cold began to blossom somewhere deep inside Kane’s center, spreading outward with every halting step she took.

  As Rebecca neared him, she dropped her head, unable or unwilling to meet his eyes. He stepped back slightly to allow her to pass, fighting the urge to crush her to him and kiss her until she looked at him like she used to. That’s when he saw what her new hairstyle had been concealing from across the room – the faded, mottled spots from the beating she had taken several weeks earlier.

  Kane couldn’t help himself. Without conscious thought, one hand grasped her upper arm while the other brushed back her hair, revealing a line of shadows that ran the length of her face, only partially concealed beneath makeup she rarely wore.

  “Jesus,” he whispered, his chest filling with so much rage his vision tinged red. Jake had told him. Nicki had told him. Goddamn it, he had known she’d been hurt. But nothing had prepared him for this, for actually seeing the evidence. Someone fucking hurt his woman. The realization hit him even harder, like a solid shot to the solar plexus with a wrecking ball.

  Rebecca Harrison was his croie.

  As the roar in his ears began to subside there came another sound, a deep warning growl. Simultaneously, Kane became aware of a steady pressure against his thighs as the big black monstrosity shouldered his body between them to separate them.

  “S’okay, Angus,” she said softly, her graceful fingers reaching down to soothe the beast. The growls stopped, but the dog did not budge.

  She only met Kane’s eyes for a second, if that, but the message it held was strong enough to burn into his mind forever: It’s too late, it said.

  The hell it was. Rebecca placed her hand over his; her fingers were stiff and cold. This was not Rebecca’s touch; she was always so warm and soft. So surprised was he that he allowed her to gently remove his hand from her arm. Then she turned and took another step. Away from him. Out of his grasp.

  At the doorway to the dining room, Rebecca asked the beast to wait. Obediently, the dog sat down on his haunches, though his eyes did not leave his mistress. Kane ran his hand over his face and exhaled. What had he expected? For her to leap into his arms at the sight of him? Well, yes, that would have been nice. He might have dreamed that at some point. Maybe several times.

  But he had never imagined the bruises. He hadn’t pictured her slow, hesitant steps to minimize the lingering pain of her injuries. Or the look in her eyes. Those big, soft, exotic brown eyes that had always looked at him with warmth and affection were now shielded and all but devoid of feeling.

  She’s lost without you. Nicki’s words resounded in his head as he tried to reconcile the loving, caring woman he’d known with the ghost he’d just seen. Jesus Christ. Rebecca Harrison loved him, and he’d turned her away.

  He took a minute to wash up in the hallway bathroom before going in to the dining room. A splash of cold water or two might help him focus, might help him to see a way through this. Because right now, after seeing her, hearing her voice, after being close enough to scent her and feel just a whisper of her fear, he didn’t seem to be capable of thinking of anything much at all.

  * * *

  Rebecca thanked Michael and Maggie for inviting her, politely commenting on how wonderful everything looked and smelled. It felt like someone else, some hollow, automated voice, was speaking for her. She made her apologies, explaining how she had promised to serve dinner down at the church’s food kitchen, and that she really had to be going.

  Aidan stood, muttering a similar excuse. He didn’t give her a chance to protest when he was suddenly beside her, his hand supportively at her back, leading her to her car with a promise to follow behind her in his. She was not happy about it, but she would not embarrass either of them in front of the others.

  * * *

  Angus was not at his post when Kane re-emerged in the hallway. No doubt he, much like Kane, found it difficult to keep his distance from Rebecca. Right now he was probably at her feet beneath the table, anxiously awaiting any scraps she might send his way. Kane knew just how he felt. He would take the smallest glance, the barest hint of a smile, anything
from her, as long as it was directed toward him.

  Rebecca had always been so ... he struggled for the right word. Loving was the only thing that seemed to come remotely close. Her heart had always been so open. Not just to him, but to everyone. But not today. Something had changed. It was as incongruous as if the wind stopped blowing or the sun stopped shining.

  Was it because of him? Because of what he had said? God knew, not a grain of it was true. No matter how honorable his intentions, the reality was that Rebecca had become everything to him – his sun, his moon, his warmth. And he had turned her away. Turned his back on her when she needed him most. How much courage had it taken for her to reveal herself to him as she had? And how much had it hurt when he shut her down?

  His chest ached so deeply he wanted to roar in agony. Because this was all his fault. If he hadn’t turned her away, she would not have been attacked. She would have been safe and warm and loved in his bed instead of lying terrified on a cold, dark floor while someone beat her and tried to rape her. Nothing like that would have happened if he hadn’t been such a blind fool, he was sure of it. Because he wouldn’t have allowed it.

  Rebecca was no stranger to pain. He’d seen the scars. Since that morning, he had lain awake every night imagining all too clearly the ways she must have gotten them. But that was before she met him. Over the past few weeks he’d learned to rationalize the horror by telling himself that nothing would have hurt her if he was around. But he couldn’t say that anymore, could he?

  Because of him, she was scared to trust anyone anymore. And that was simply unacceptable. She had opened up her heart and soul to him, and he’d packed her up and sent her home like a troublesome child.

  When Kane entered the dining room, he searched for her. But she wasn’t there. Nor was Aidan. It was too quiet. And too many eyes avoided his.

  “Uncle Kane, sit by me!” Riley’s voice rang out in the tense silence. Kane ruffled her hair, tried to offer her a reassuring smile. “Thanks, princess. But I can’t stay. I just stopped by to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving.”

  “Are you gonna have dinner with Becca, Uncle Kane?” she asked. “’Cuz Mom says no one should spend Thanksgiving alone.”

  Kane avoided looking at Taryn, not wanting to face the silent demand he knew burned through her unique violet eyes. “Your mom’s absolutely right, princess. Have some pie for me, will you?”

  * * *

  Aidan’s Benz pulled next to Rebecca’s in the parking lot behind the church. He sprung out of his car and was opening her door before she had a chance to do so herself.

  “How could you, Aidan?”

  Angry or not, she accepted the hand he offered her, wishing she had rented something a little easier to manage. It was a fine thing when she was feeling good, but as stiff and sore as she was it was difficult to get in and out of the small vehicle with any semblance of grace.

  “How could I what? It’s Thanksgiving, Becca. I missed the last twelve of them with you. I’m not going to miss this one, too.”

  Angus bounded across the driver’s seat – little more than a shift of weight for him – and landed quietly on the pavement. He leaned his big body against her thigh, instinctively offering comfort as he looked between them.

  “Not that, Aidan,” she said with impatience, pinning him with an accusing glare. “You invited him, didn’t you?”

  Aidan’s eyes widened as realization dawned. “Kane? Of course not.”

  Rebecca snorted derisively.

  “Michael’s house, Becca, not mine. Believe it or not, Maggie did not consult with me on her guest list.”

  A glimmer of doubt reflected in her eyes. She was blaming Aidan for something that most likely wasn’t his fault. Kane was family, after all. And Aidan was like family, too. If anything, she was the one who didn’t belong.

  “But maybe I should have called him,” he challenged. “You wouldn’t have been attacked if he’d been around.”

  “Is that what you think?” Rebecca’s entire world lurched sickeningly. Had that been Kane’s whole purpose? To guard and protect her, to look over her when she would allow no one else to do so? She asked her brother outright, no longer having the patience to pussyfoot around the issue.

  “Of course not!” Aidan protested angrily when she confronted him. “Jesus. Do you really think Kane is the babysitting type, Becca?”

  She considered the possibility, not wanting to believe it. Even when he’d brought her back from the cabin, she still felt that he had spent time with her simply because he wanted to. It was only when she had crossed the line that that had changed.

  “Then why would you say such a thing, Aidan?”

  It was Aidan’s turn to snort derisively. “You haven’t been yourself for weeks, Becca. You’ve been so distant, so distracted ever since you came back from the mountains. You took off alone, heading to a dark building that was supposed to be empty, ensuring you made the perfect target. What the hell happened up there anyway?” His eyes narrowed. “Did he..?”

  “No,” she laughed, the sound desperate and just shy of hysterical. “He didn’t.” Her face hardened. “But I offered myself to him, Aidan. I practically threw myself at him and you know what he did? He packed me up like a naughty child and brought me straight home.”

  “Jesus, Becca. I’m your brother, for God’s sake. I don’t want to hear that shit.”

  “Yeah, I know,” she said, deflating again as she stepped into him, into his familiar warmth, just as she had when they were kids and something upset her. She might be older, but Aidan had always been so much stronger.

  “It’s just... He’s different, you know? I thought maybe he was the ...” Her voice trembled as she just barely stopped herself from voicing the horrible heartbreak she felt. To say it out loud would be to experience it all over again.

  “Ah, baby, I’m sorry.”

  She sniffled against his shoulder. “Me, too. Just... don’t go blaming him, okay?”

  “Okay,” he said, pulling her close and kissing the top of her head. He held her like that for a moment; it didn’t make her pain go away, but it did help a little.

  “Come on,” he said finally, tugging her toward the church. “I’m starving.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Kane parked halfway down the block and cut the engine. Rebecca and Aidan were still at the church; a quick drive by had confirmed that. Probably not for much longer, though. Dusk was settling quickly, and the church would be closing after the last remnants of the afternoon meal were cleared away.

  It was a quaint little Victorian, done in tasteful, neutral shades. Lots of small, angled roofs amid larger ones. Windows with actual workable shutters. A small front porch with a swing. Well landscaped bushes. A cobbled walk to the front steps. Detached garage in the back. It looked like something out of a storybook; so much so that he half expected to see Rebecca glide onto the porch and have a bluebird swoop down and land on her shoulder affectionately.

  A closer look, however, revealed that it needed some work. A few shingles hung loosely on the far side. The gutters needed replacing, as well as the worn porch steps. Things he could fix easily. Things he would fix if Rebecca gave him the chance. Anything to be near her again. He’d be Bob Fucking Villa if it gave him the chance to spend time with her.

  Within the hour, he spotted her little silver car pulling into the driveway and down the back. The dusk to dawn light back there wasn’t working. This was a nice neighborhood, but it wasn’t safe for her to be getting in and out of her car in the dark like that, out of the sight of her neighbors. It would be the first thing to be fixed, he decided, wondering why her brother hadn’t already taken care of it. But he already knew why. Because Rebecca probably wouldn’t allow it. Screw that.

  A few minutes later he saw a light come on at the back of the house. The glow filtered through the flimsy sheers of the big bay window in front. Her silhouette passed back and forth a few times before settling.

  Darkness came early this time of year
, the winter solstice only a few weeks away. When the light had faded sufficiently, Kane left the comfort of his truck and made his way closer to the little house. He stood among the shadows of the large maple in between the sidewalk and the street, and gazed inside.

  The second story windows were curtained on the street side. But the first floor windows had only delicate lace adorning them. From this vantage point, he could see through the room with the bay window into what looked like a kitchen beyond. He saw Rebecca put her barely touched plate on the floor for Angus, petting him gently while he feasted on her dinner.

  Of course she wouldn’t have eaten at the church. Rebecca always ate alone. Except when she was with him. She’d even let him feed her that once. The image of her closed eyes, chocolate-caked lips, and cream filling tipped nose filled his mind, along with the pure delight she’d experienced with that damned whoopie pie. It seemed like a lifetime ago.

  When the plate was licked clean – perhaps a total elapsed time of six or seven seconds, Rebecca gathered up the lone plate and glass, washed them, and placed them in the drainer. It was all terribly lonely, and one thing he knew for certain – Rebecca should not be alone, not as long as he drew breath.

  Kane moved up the cobbled walk. He had to fix this. He wasn’t exactly sure how he was going to manage it. He’d run a bunch of scenarios through his mind, trying to plan for every eventuality, but the truth was, he wasn’t sure what kind of a reaction Rebecca would have to him. If that afternoon had been any indication, it wasn’t going to be easy getting close to her again, but he sure as hell was going to try, because there just wasn’t any other option.

  The wooden steps creaked beneath his weight, but held. A little shoring beneath, he figured somewhere in the back of his head, and some new boards on top. A few hours work, nothing more.

  He got as far as the front door, raised his hand to press the bell... and the door opened. Rebecca looked at him through the screen door. Angus stood protectively by her side, regarding him with eerily intelligent blue eyes.