Halcyon Rising

by Diana Bold

  “Rhoswen, you are so beautiful.” He placed tender kisses upon her forehead, nose and lips, then lifted her in his arms and sat her upon a small flat rock at the base of the fall.

  Kneeling before her, he ran his fingertips across her chest and belly, loving the slippery feel of her beautiful skin beneath his hands. She closed her eyes and leaned back, sighing as he teased her nipples to turgid attention. He bent to take one in his mouth, suckling her as she buried her hands in his hair.

  Parting her thighs with his hands, he leaned even closer for a taste of her. He moaned against her sweet cleft, spearing two fingers deep inside her as he swirled his tongue around her distended little bud. Never had he made love to a woman this pure and clean. She tasted and smelled like heaven, like everything good that had been missing from his life.

  “Sebastian,” she sobbed, trembling against him. “Don’t stop. Don’t ever stop.”

  Her cry spurred him on, and he doubled his efforts, holding her on the razor’s edge without pushing her all the way over. The water pounded against his back, the steam billowing around them. Rhoswen’s breathy sobs filled the cavern until at last he let her climax.

  Before she had a chance to recover, he picked her up and impaled her, sinking to the hilt in her warm, wet channel. She cried out and braced her hands against his shoulders for balance, making pain ricochet through him as she inadvertently grasped his wound.

  Turning, he anchored her against the cave wall, slamming into her again and again, too aroused to let a little pain ruin this for him. She clung to him like moss as he thrust between her thighs. He gave in to every erotic fantasy he’d had since she had let him tie her to the bed and make love to her the first time.

  His orgasm started at his toes and exploded through his body, nearly bringing him to his knees. When the last shudder had ended, he let her slowly slide down the wall as he buried his face in her hair. “Hot showers,” he whispered. “The best thing ever invented. And we did not even have to go to Halcyon to find one.”

  * * *

  Afterward, Sebastian spread their blankets out upon the smooth stone floor of the cavern and coaxed Rhoswen to lie down beside him. “I suppose it would not hurt if we rested here for awhile. Sleep if you like.”

  She smiled up at him drowsily and stretched out upon her stomach. “Sleep sounds wonderful.”

  Unable to keep from touching her, he lay down beside her and pulled her against him, gently kneading the base of her lovely, slim neck.

  “You really do have magical hands.” She reached up and brought one of his hands to her mouth and brushed her lips across his knuckles. “When you touch me all my aches and pains fade into insignificance.”

  “I learned the art of healing with my hands while I was in the desert.” He winced, wishing he had kept that fact to himself. He wanted nothing of that time to ruin this.

  She propped herself on one elbow and peered down at him, her lovely face limned by the soft, overhead lights. “Do you want to talk about what happened to you?” She brushed his hair from his eyes with a gentle hand. “I think it might help.”

  He glanced away. Her words created havoc within him. “I thought you already knew. I thought you had seen it all when you delved my mind.”

  This explained everything. No wonder she had allowed him to touch her with his filthy hands. She had not realized the extent of his perversions.

  “I saw parts of it. Flashes of pain and pleasure.” Her voice lowered as she continued to touch his face with her soft hands. “I know you were raped, Sebastian.”

  He shuddered, having never actually allowed that word to enter his mind before. Raped? Rape was something that happened to women, was it not? And it had not been like that, never that easy. There had always been the illusion of choice, and perhaps that was what he had struggled with the most.

  “I went with him willingly enough at first, Rhoswen. He promised me answers. He promised me all matter of things….”

  She pressed her lips against his temple. “You were young. You were curious. He took advantage of you.”

  He swallowed convulsively. “At first he fulfilled his promises. He taught me astronomy and alchemy, allowed me access to his vast library. In the evenings, he would share his opium pipe, while the women of his harem entertained us.”

  He flushed a bit, remembering the varied sex acts he’d witnessed. Beautiful women, kissing and stroking each other. The opium had dulled his arousal somewhat, leaving him in a dreamlike state of bliss.

  “It shocked you,” she whispered softly, no hint of judgment in her voice. “But you could not help but be intrigued. You wanted to know what it would be like, to lie with such beautiful women.”

  He cast her a quick glance beneath his lashes, surprised by her matter-of-fact tone. “I soon realized that while I was watching them, he was watching me. But by then I had become addicted to the opium and nothing really mattered anymore. I just wanted to drift in that pleasant haze.”

  “He seduced you. When you were at your most vulnerable, he touched you. At first you didn’t even know it was his hand that stroked you.”

  “Jesu Christ.” He shoved away from her, scrambling to his knees, his chest heaving. “I do not want you to know these things. I cannot bear it.”

  “Nothing that happened was your fault,” she whispered, pressing against him, refusing to let him put the distance he needed between them. “You did what you had to do to survive. I’m glad you did, Sebastian, because if you hadn’t, you wouldn’t have been at Hawkesmere to help me. I would have never met you or found out what an amazing man you are.”

  To his horror, he realized he was crying. Harsh, wracking sobs he could not seem to control. He tried once again to pull away, but she hung on with stubborn determination.

  “Oh, Sebastian. It’s all right, darling. It’s all right. I hate what was done to you, but I love you all the more for having survived it.”

  Love? The word stymied him, made the emotions breaking apart inside him even harder to contain. He had never expected this, that she would say the word he wanted so badly to hear, especially not when faced with his weakest moment.

  Crushing her against him, he buried his face in the soft skin between her neck and shoulder, holding her as the wave of emotion slowly subsided.

  Rhoswen hugged Sebastian tightly, wishing she hadn’t pushed him to reveal this to her. She’d hoped to help him put the horror of his past behind him, but feared she’d just made him relive it all.

  She’d never seen a man a cry before and had no idea how to handle it. He tried to hide it from her, but his pain only added to his allure. She loved that he was able to show his emotions this way. Compared to the cool, distant men she’d known in her past, his emotional depth was very appealing.

  She hadn’t meant to tell him she loved him, wasn’t even sure he’d heard her, but she wasn’t sorry she had. For a woman who had never felt very deeply, her feelings for Sebastian were both frightening and exhilarating.

  Pulling back the blankets, she coaxed him to lie down beside her once more, then snuggled up beside him, loving the way it felt to be in his arms. The thought of having this every night crossed her mind once again, and she swore she’d find a way for them to be together for more than the next twenty-four hours. She wanted Sebastian, even if it meant giving up Halcyon forever.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Sebastian and Rhoswen slept far longer than they had intended. When they awoke, the starry sky of the night before had been replaced by the bright lights of day.

  For a moment Sebastian just blinked, trying to orient himself. Somehow, the people of ancient Halcyon had found a way to change their environment from night to day, probably in an attempt to give some sort of measurability to the interminable days below the Surface.

  “Amazing, isn’t it?” Rhoswen shifted beside him, pushing herself up on one elbow and giving him a luminous smile. “I still don’t know how it works after all this time.”

  “Fairy magic?”
he suggested teasingly.

  She leaned forward and gave him a soft kiss. “I’m so glad you let me come with you. I wouldn’t have missed last night for anything.”

  Will you choose me over Trevelan? He wanted to ask, but did not want to spoil the moment. Last night she had said she loved him. If only he could bring himself to believe her. If only he could make himself let go of his doubts.

  “I am also glad,” he admitted. “I hope the rest of our trip goes this smoothly. I do not want to put you in any danger.”

  “You’ve already made me promise to stay in the tower,” she reminded him. “I’ll be fine.”

  He cupped her face in his hands, staring into her beautiful eyes, willing her to understand how serious he was. “You have to promise me that at the slightest hint of trouble you will go back to Halcyon without me — without Trevelan, if need be. I cannot do what I must if I have to worry about you doing something stupid and heroic.”

  “Stupid and heroic?” She shook her head and gave a soft laugh. “You’re a fine one to talk. You’ve been doing stupid, heroic things since I first met you.”

  He ignored her jab and held her gaze. “Promise me, Rhoswen. I am serious.”

  “All right,” she whispered, her attempt at levity fading. “I swear I won’t do anything to put myself in danger. The last thing I want to do is distract you.”

  “Thank you.” He gave her a long, lingering kiss but managed to bank the explosive passion she always roused within him. They had spent far too much time here already. He pulled reluctantly away and offered her a tender smile. “Shall we get dressed and try to find the secret tower entrance?”

  “I suppose we must. But I’d rather stay here with you. I love you, Sebastian.”

  He would rather stay here, too. He had no illusions about the dangers that lay ahead. His chances of doing everything he needed to do were slim, and the temptation to linger, to prolong this little slice of Heaven before his inevitable trip to Hell, overwhelmed him.

  If only they could forget Trevelan, forget the dying people of Hawkesmere and spend the rest of their days here in Old Halcyon. Given enough time, he knew he could rebuild the ancient city to some of its former glory. These rock and stone dwellings would never be as comfortable as the apartment she had left behind, but they were far better than Hawkesmere.

  They could forge a life here. The temptation to do so took his breath away. But as he gazed down into her beloved face, he knew her love for him would not survive such selfishness. Giving her one last, lingering kiss, he pushed to his feet and began to dress.

  Suddenly subdued, Rhoswen followed suit. Her movements were jerky—angry even. For a moment he did not know why, but then he realized he had been so caught up in his mental anguish he had not reciprocated her last statement. More importantly, he had not responded to the one she had made last night in the heat of the moment.

  He opened his mouth, words of love on the tip of his tongue, then closed it regretfully. Was it worse to say the words now, when she would feel they had been forced, or not say them at all?

  Before he could decide, she finished dressing and started packing their things away. It seemed the moment had passed.

  Melancholy, he searched through his pack until he found their bundle of food. He offered her a chunk of soft, white bread to break her fast, and then hurriedly ate his own, impatient to be on their way.

  Ten minutes later, they were hiking down another tunnel, this one on the far side of the settlement from where they had entered. It angled slightly upward and Rhoswen’s compass had determined they were headed in Hawkesmere’s direction. But she had not said more than a handful of words to him since they had finished eating, and he knew he had hurt her.

  He wanted to fix the rift, but did not know how. In a matter of hours, it might not even matter anymore, but he did not want to leave things like this between them. Gathering his nerve, he reached out and caught her arm, turning her to face him.

  “You know I love you, don’t you?”

  She looked up at him, and her eyes filled with tears. “No,” she whispered. “I don’t. How could I? You never said. Not even once.”

  He cupped her face in his hands, overwhelmed with tenderness. “Do you think I would have risked my brother’s wrath if I did not love you? Do you think I would be going to rescue the man who might take you away from me forever if I did not love you?”

  Her tears spilled over, making silvery tracks down her pale cheeks. “There’ve been times I was sure you did, but every time I thought I was certain, you pulled away.”

  “I do not wish to love you,” he admitted hoarsely. “I do not wish to feel this way. The thought of losing you frightens me far more than the thought of dying at my brother’s hands.”

  “Don’t say things like that,” she cried. “Everything’s going to be fine. You won’t lose me. If you want me, I’m yours. Somehow we’ll find a way.”

  “Do you swear?” he asked, afraid to hope. “Do you swear to stay with me, no matter what happens today?”

  “Of course.” She flung her arms around him and hugged him tight. “That’s all I want. That’s the whole reason I wanted to come with you. I didn’t want to say good-bye to you. Not now, not ever.”

  “Rhoswen, my love. I never thought to find someone like you. I never thought I would feel like this. Loving you scares the hell out of me, but I would do anything not to lose this. To keep you.”

  “And I, you,” she whispered. “I love you, Sebastian. Only you. Always you.”

  He held her awhile longer, all the tension and guilt of the last hour fading away. He had done the right thing by telling her. In fact, he had never been so sure of anything in his life. No matter what the day held, he now knew he had done everything possible to put things right between them.

  After a long moment, he pulled reluctantly away. “We have a long way ahead of us. We should keep going.”

  She nodded and brushed away what he hoped were happy tears. “You’re right, of course. But I needed to hear you say that. I needed it more than you can ever know.”

  He gave her a tender smile. “I think I needed to say it even more than you needed to hear it. I have never said those words to anyone before, you know.”

  “Neither have I,” she said softly.

  For a few seconds they just stared at each other, then she laughed and grabbed his hand, pulling him forward. For a long time, nothing more was said. They continued their trek, hand in hand, down the seemingly endless tunnel.

  As they walked, Sebastian mentally reviewed his plans, such as they were. Before, he had approached Trevelan’s rescue with fatalistic resignation, never truly believing he would survive the attempt, but now he had the promise of a future to look forward to.

  Somehow, he must succeed not only in freeing Trevelan, but in making it out of Hawkesmere himself. He briefly entertained the idea of forgetting about the medicines he had brought, but knew he could never live with himself if he did.

  Perhaps his concern for his fellow man had been late in coming, but his love for Rhoswen had opened his eyes to the world around him. It would be a betrayal of what she had come to mean to him, of the man her love had made him, were he to turn his back on the people of Hawkesmere now.

  He tried to imagine Simon’s state of mind once he had returned to Hawkesmere. Had his brother considered the threat eliminated, or had he placed the guards on heightened alert? Had he moved Trevelan back to the dungeons or left him in the tower room where he had been taken to convalesce?

  Miranda might know and she was the only one he trusted enough to ask, but she dwelt outside the castle walls. Seeking her out would negate the advantage of the tunnels.

  No, he would just have to take his chances and depend on his knowledge of the castle’s myriad hidden passageways. The tunnels had been built to provide escape routes for the lords and ladies of Hawkesmere. Hopefully they would shield him from discovery as he navigated Hawkesmere’s walls.

  “You’re quie
t,” Rhoswen said, after a long while. “What are you thinking about?”

  “Just making plans.” He shrugged. “Helping Trevelan escape is either going to be relatively simple or damned near impossible. I will not know until I get there.”

  She squeezed his hand in an obvious attempt to offer comfort. “I’ve been thinking, too. I hate that I had to ask this of you, hate that my actions make it necessary to try. But I want you to promise me something now.”

  He cast her a quick glance, suddenly wary. “Of course. Anything you want.”

  “Promise me you won’t take any unnecessary risks. Promise me if, as you say, rescuing Trevelan is damned near impossible, you won’t attempt it. Come back to me, and we’ll try to come up with a different plan.” She stopped and grabbed his other hand, forcing him to stop and meet her earnest gaze. “I won’t lose you both.”

  He leaned forward and pressed his lips to her forehead. Her concern for his safety erased the last of his doubts about her feelings for Trevelan. “All right. I promise I will be careful.”

  She searched his eyes for a long moment, as though trying to ascertain the truth behind his words, then finally sighed and started walking again.

  They continued on in silence for what seemed an eternity. Rhoswen had wilted visibly, and he was about to suggest they stop and rest for awhile when the tunnel finally came to an abrupt dead-end. A deep pool of steaming water blocked the path in front of them, and beyond that lay a solid stone wall.

  “This can’t be right,” she muttered, turning around in a circle as though another way would magically appear. “This can’t be the end of the tunnel.”

  He released a low curse of frustration. He had been skeptical of this hidden entrance to the tower all along, but after seeing Old Halcyon he had allowed himself to believe he had somehow overlooked something that had literally been right in front of him for years. Now they had apparently wasted several days chasing something that was not there.