Tattered Stars

by Catherine Cowles

  “What?”

  “Was that really necessary?”

  Her eyes glinted in the low light of dusk. “I’m allowed to be worried about my daughter when she disappears. I worry about them both. But I know with Shy it’s because she can’t handle something. With Hadley, it’s simply because she doesn’t care. It’s selfish. And I’m allowed to say as much.” With her final words, she shoved back from the table and headed for the back deck.

  I looked across the table at my dad. “Some family dinner.”

  He tried to lift the corners of his mouth in a grin but couldn’t muster it. Neither of us could. Because those five days all those years ago were still tearing us apart.

  9

  Everly

  “Thank you again for taking me on.”

  The man in his fifties gave me a kind smile, the dark skin around his mouth forming grooves that told me he made the motion often. “I am beyond thrilled to have someone with your experience on my roster.”

  Dr. Taylor—Miles, as he’d insisted I call him—seemed as if he would be a dream boss. He was kind, knowledgeable, and ran a tight ship. We’d had several phone calls and a video conference before he made me the job offer, but something about meeting someone in person was the real test. And Miles was a dream.

  “You’re sure you don’t need me this week? I can work a couple of shifts if you do.”

  He shook his head. “You get settled. There’s plenty of work to come. Take some time and get to know the town again. I’m sure a lot has changed since you were here.”

  “There are definitely some new restaurants I’d like to try.”

  “I highly recommend Spoons. They opened this year and have a revolving menu of soups, salads, and sandwiches.”

  “That sounds perfect. I think I’m going to head there now.”

  He extended a hand to me for a shake. “Sounds like a good plan to me. Welcome aboard, Everly. We’re so happy to have you.”

  “Thank you.” I released his grip, picking up my purse and heading for the door. I waved at the receptionist, Tim, who seemed to remember me even though he was a few years younger. But he’d been warm in his greeting, no instant hatred because of who I was related to.

  I took a deep breath as I stepped outside, letting the clean air soothe the nerves that had been running rampant since I’d stepped out of my SUV. The first meeting was over, and it hadn’t been a disaster. Everyone at the office had been kind.

  That knowledge gave me the most dangerous of feelings…hope. That I would be able to make a life here. Possibly have a community. Friends. My phone buzzed in my purse.

  Shay: How’s it going? I’ve been trying not to hover, but I’m dying to know every detail.

  I grinned down at the screen. Even if I didn’t make the best of friends in Wolf Gap, I still had Shay. Our friendship was one borne of running from our pasts. Hers had just been more violent than mine. The fact that she’d found a true home gave me another dose of that reckless hope.

  Me: It’s been pretty good. How about a catch-up tonight? I’m heading to pick up lunch and then need to run a few errands.

  Shay: Sounds good. Call me whenever.

  I slid my phone back into my purse. As I looked up, I stumbled back a step. Familiar whiskey-colored eyes met mine. Just as hard as the last time I’d seen them. I straightened my shoulders. I would not cower from him now. I might still be years younger than him, but I was smarter now. Stealthier. And I knew half of Ian’s power came from his mind games.

  I kept my face perfectly blank. “Hello.”

  His lip curled in a sneer. “You have a lot of nerve showing your face around here.”

  “Good to see you, too, brother dearest.”

  He spat on the ground between us, a move so similar to my uncle’s that it cramped my stomach. But that had been the only real influence Ian had over the past few years. “You’re no sister of mine.”

  I wished it was that simple for me. That I could sever every tie with a flick of a knife or a carelessly tossed-out word. But I couldn’t. I felt every tether as if it were made of the heaviest chain. It seemed like I’d never be rid of them. “Then I guess there’s nothing left to talk about.” I moved to step around him, but Ian mirrored the movement.

  “When are you leaving?”

  My heart rate picked up a fraction, but I did my best not to let the panic show. “I’m not.”

  “That land isn’t yours.”

  “The deed says otherwise.”

  Ian’s hands fisted and flexed. “I’m the oldest in this family—”

  “Actually, that would be Jacey.”

  “A woman. I’m the leader. By rights, that land should fall to me.”

  I rolled my eyes. Uncle Allen had clearly been hard at work, inundating Ian with his twisted thinking. The same mindset that meant Addie was never allowed to show her shoulders or knees. “I don’t know what to tell you. According to the courts, it belongs to me.”

  “I don’t submit to those courts. Those laws mean nothing.”

  A faint wave of nausea slid through me. It sounded so familiar—the kind of tirade our father used to go on. “If you live in this country, those laws apply to you.”

  “Your mind’s been warped. You don’t remember where you come from. But you will.”

  He was wrong. I remembered all too well. At times, it felt as if it were burned into my bones and I’d never be rid of it.

  Ian smiled, but it had an ugliness to it that had me fighting a shiver. “You could always plead your case to come back into the fold. Signing the land over and submitting to whatever punishment Allen deems right for you would probably do the trick. You might even con Ben into marrying you since his wife died in childbirth.”

  Nausea swelled and strengthened. I would never go back to that life, but my chest tightened at the mention of Ben’s name. The third piece of my and Addie’s trio. My best friend. I hated that I hadn’t even known he’d gotten married. And now his wife was dead? Probably because of a refusal to take her to a hospital. The knowledge made me rage…for this anonymous woman, for Ben. “I’m afraid I’ll have to pass.”

  “Ian.” Uncle Allen’s voice boomed across the street. “It’s time to go.” The hatred pouring from his eyes felt like a living, breathing flame that could burn me alive.

  Ian knocked into my shoulder as he walked away. “Watch your back.”

  I swallowed the bile that crept up my throat, watching as they drove off. Suddenly, lunch didn’t sound appealing at all.

  Chip sat on the coffee table with a bowl of nuts as I did my best to scrub the oven. The amount of baked-on grease was enough to make me lose the meager amount of food I’d been able to consume this afternoon. It had been more of a battle of wills. I hadn’t wanted to give my brother the power to take away my appetite. So, I’d forced a sandwich down once I got home.

  Home. I leaned back to rest on my heels. Would this place ever truly feel that way? Chip let out a happy little sound as he nibbled away, and I couldn’t help but smile. “Taste good?”

  He gave a series of squeaks as if to agree.

  I groaned and rubbed at my temples. “I’m losing it. Talking to a chipmunk.”

  I heard the now-familiar sound of tires on gravel. Taking a long, steadying breath, I made a promise to myself not to kill whoever was coming up the drive. But I wasn’t sure I’d be able to live up to that promise. This day had burned away the last of my patience.

  I pushed to my feet and took up my usual vantage point at the window, where my shotgun was within reach. Peeking through the curtains, I muttered a curse as I saw the light bar on top of the SUV. “Great, just great.” I had half a mind to bring my shotgun out with me, but I resisted.

  Crossing to the door, I pulled it open just as Hayes climbed out of his sheriff’s department vehicle. Unfortunately, there was no gorgeous dog to temper his visit this time.

  I leaned against the porch railing. “You know, you come here a lot for someone who hates the sight of m
e.”

  Hayes scowled, the movement somehow making his dark blue eyes shine in the afternoon light. “I don’t hate the sight of you.”

  “That scowl on your face says otherwise.”

  He let out a long sigh as he came to a stop at the bottom of my porch steps. “I was surprised that it was you when I showed up here. I thought someone from out of town had bought the place.”

  “And being surprised turns you into an asshole?”

  The corner of his mouth quirked up. “It might. I certainly do better when I know what I’m getting myself into.” I was silent for a moment, simply taking the man’s measure. He shifted on his feet. “I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve the greeting I gave you. I was trying to shield my family, but I didn’t need to be a jerk to do it. Think you can forgive me for not handling myself well?”

  I gripped the railing, my fingers digging into the freshly stained wood. It turned out Hayes could be a charmer when he needed to be. Which meant it was my turn to scowl. “Oh, turn that grin off. I’m not gonna fall at your feet because you flashed those pearly whites at me.”

  He chuckled. “A smile never hurts when you’re trying to get your point across.”

  “I’ve always been a believer that actions speak louder than words.”

  “Let my actions speak, then.”

  “And what actions would those be?”

  Hayes was quiet for a moment, his gaze traveling over the property. “My mom said you were turning this place into an animal sanctuary.”

  “That’s what I’m working towards.” Unfortunately, the process was moving as slow as molasses. I still wasn’t done with the repairs and renovations on the cabin.

  “Let me help you get this place into shape.”

  My mouth fell open. A fly could’ve swooped right in. “You…want to help me make repairs on this place?”

  He rubbed at the back of his neck. “Why not? My dad said he’s coming out this weekend to check out the barn. I can help him. I grew up on a ranch. I know my way around hard work.”

  I snapped my mouth closed, swallowing the million and one retorts that wanted to surface. Ones that lashed out and told Hayes to get off my property. I took a deep breath. “Okay.”

  The word was out before I could think better of it. Before I could remember the hatred I’d seen flash in Hayes’ gaze that first day. I closed my eyes for a moment, reminding myself that I could take it, whatever his emotions. Because if he didn’t let them out, they’d simply fester. To move forward, we had to look at this head-on.

  “Okay?” Surprise lit his tone.

  I nodded. “You can help on the weekends.”

  “I have some afternoons off—”

  I shook my head, cutting him off. “Weekends are enough.” I couldn’t deal with him all week, too. Two days would be more than enough.

  “All right, then. I’ll see you this weekend. Let me know if there are tools you think I’ll need to bring.”

  “I guess I could send you some smoke signals.”

  His lips twitched, and the movement stirred something in me that I didn’t want to look too closely at. “All right, smartass. Take my number.”

  I pulled out my phone and unlocked the screen. I typed his name into my contacts. “Ready.” He listed off the digits, and I plugged them in. “Prepare for some prank calls.”

  Hayes groaned. “I guess I’d deserve that.”

  “You would.”

  His gaze met mine, freezing me to the spot. “Call me if you need anything.”

  I wouldn’t. “Okay.”

  He shook his head as if he knew I was lying and turned towards his SUV. “I’ll be seeing you.”

  The words felt like both a promise and a threat. There’d be no escaping Hayes now.

  10

  Hayes

  A knock sounded on my door, and I looked up from the pile of paperwork on my desk to see Calder standing in my doorway. “Look what the cat dragged in after he got it out of a tree.”

  “After all the calls you get from Ms. Pat, I’d say missing cats are your wheelhouse, brother.”

  I leaned back in my chair and glared at him. Because he was right. I’d had two this morning already.

  Calder barked out a laugh. “She called you today already, didn’t she?”

  “It’s been a long Friday, and it’s only nine a.m.”

  He slid into one of the chairs opposite me at my desk and set down some coffee in a to-go cup. “Maybe this will help.”

  I eyed him cautiously. “You’re bringing me coffee…”

  “Yes…”

  “You need a favor, or something bad happened.”

  Calder rolled his eyes. “So suspicious of everyone.”

  “I’m suspicious of you because I’ve known you my entire life.”

  “Can’t a guy check up on his friend? Make sure he’s hanging in there?”

  I picked up the cup and took a sip. “Mom told you Everly’s back?”

  “Hadley took the twins to the park yesterday.”

  Hads adored Birdie and Sage and loved stealing them away for adventures whenever she could. I scrubbed a hand over my face. “She talk to you about Mom at all?”

  “No. They get into it at family dinner?”

  “Understatement.” Over the years, Calder had become one of the family and had seen more than a few dustups between Hadley and Mom.

  His gaze drifted out the window as a muscle ticked in his cheek. “Hads needs to understand that she can’t just take off to climb a mountain by herself and expect no one to worry.”

  “I know that, and you know that, but Hadley’s yearned to stretch her wings from the time she was seven. Mom and Dad were protective after what happened to Shiloh, and Hadley took the brunt of it for the longest.”

  Calder looked back to me. “I get that she needs freedom, but it’s not worth her getting hurt or killed.”

  His words alone caused my chest to constrict, made breathing just a little more difficult. Calder muttered a curse. “Sorry, man. I shouldn’t have said it like that. I know you worry about her.”

  “It’s fine.” But the tension in my voice argued otherwise.

  He studied me for a moment, likely taking in the lie. “Want to come fishing with me and the girls tomorrow? Should be the perfect day for it.”

  “Can’t.”

  “Helping out at the ranch?”

  I picked up a pencil and rolled it between my fingers. “Dad and I are going up to Everly’s to assess her barn. It looks like it’s one gust of wind away from collapsing.”

  Calder’s brows rose practically to his hairline. “You’re going to help out up there?”

  I wasn’t setting foot near that damn shed. But I didn’t mind helping stabilize the barn, run some new fence line—whatever else she needed. “She wants to start an animal sanctuary, and I’m trying to make up for being a total asshole to her when I showed up at her place the first time.” Well, the first and the second times.

  Calder snorted. “You never did handle surprises well.”

  “Shut up.”

  “Sounds like a good use for all that land. And it’s something the community could get behind.”

  “More than a few animals in this county could use a good home.”

  He took a sip of his coffee and then rested it on the arm of his chair. “You think she’ll give them that?”

  “I do.” Everly had a stubborn determination that meant she wouldn’t back down from a challenge. But there was gentleness, too. The way she’d sunk to the ground to engulf Koda in a hug. “She was good with Koda.”

  “Probably the only way she could’ve gotten you on her side—being good to that dog of yours.”

  “Sides have nothing to do with it. I’m just trying to make things right after biting her head off.”

  Calder’s expression sobered. “You gotta let this go, Hayes. The only person responsible for what happened is in jail. He’ll be there for a long time. It wasn’t Everly’s fault, and it sure as hell wasn
’t yours.”

  My back molars ground together. “I know that.”

  “You may know it in your head, but your heart sure as hell doesn’t. That guilt is going to eat you alive.”

  It wouldn’t. Not if I didn’t let it catch me. It was why I stayed so busy. And why I went on such long runs. “Every time I see someone from that family, it’s a reminder of how I failed. Of all the ways my family is still broken. So, I get angry. Not because it’s any of their faults, but because when I see them, I have to remember.”

  “If you’re going to be helping Everly, you’re gonna need to figure out a way to come to terms with this. It’s not fair for you to hold on to all this anger and make her deal with it.”

  “I know, it’s not,” I growled. It made me feel like the lowest of the low that anger had been my reaction to seeing the woman who had saved my sister’s life when she was a girl. But there was more than anger in the mix now, too. There was also a healthy dose of admiration.

  “Okay.”

  “I’m working on it.”

  Calder’s mouth twitched. “She flusters you. Is she pretty?”

  “Pretty?” No, Everly was heart-stoppingly gorgeous. She had the kind of beauty that could bring a man to his knees. I bit the inside of my cheek to stop that train of thought.

  “Yeah. Is she attractive?”

  I spun the pencil between my fingers. “I guess you could say that.”

  Calder barked out a laugh. “Oh, man, this is going to be so much fun to watch. Maybe the girls and I should ditch fishing and go up the mountain to watch the show.”

  “Don’t make me deck you. You know I’ll do it.”

  “I’m not scared of you. I know all your tells.”

  My eyes narrowed at my lifelong friend. “I still have some tricks you’ve never seen.”

  “But I’m quicker. That’s what happens when you have to do your job with forty-five pounds of gear on your back. That desk you’re riding has made you lazy.”

  “I do not ride a desk,” I said through gritted teeth.