Stupid Girl

by Mary E. Twomey

  I tried not to scream, to preserve what was left of my pride, but the bitten-off howl fooled nobody. I didn’t exactly have much in the way of dignity, since my dress was hiked up to my waist, exposing my underwear and legs to the total stranger. Someone heavy was on top of my chest, crushing my shoulders to the stone of the kitchen floor.

  “I need to knock her out, or all this movement’s going to cause more tearing. Princess, can you hear me?”

  “Yes! Do whatever you have to do!”

  “Amazing! I hoped, but truly, you can hear me?”

  “Yes, I can hear you! Knock me out! Bastien? Lane? Kerdik?” I didn’t know who was with me, but I prayed it was someone safe.

  Roland’s voice rang out in my ears. “I’m here, Princess.”

  “No!” I screamed, thrashing anew. “Kerdik! Help!”

  “I’m right here, darling.” It was then I realized the heavy body crushing my chest was Kerdik. Roland must be at my feet.

  “Don’t leave me with Roland! Don’t let me pass out if you’re not with me!”

  Kerdik shifted so I could see his face. His expression was that of a man being moved to greatness for the glory of battle. His eyes burned with intensity, boring into my soul with a permanence I was too deranged to fully appreciate. “Darling, I won’t leave your side. On my honor.”

  “Promise me!”

  He managed a small smile. “That’s what ‘on my honor’ means. I promise to stay by your side until you wake. I’m here, Rosie.”

  Something that smelled like lemon and thyme was waved under my nose, and breath by breath, the pain and the world began to slip away from me. “Don’t leave me,” I begged over and over, until the darkness took me from Kerdik.

  Taking Sides

  I awoke to a groan and something smelly. I sneezed a few times, afraid of everything all at once. “Kerdik?!” I rasped, coughing until I was gingerly sat up, and a cup of water was brought to my lips.

  “I’m right here, love.” His green hand slipped into mine, and finally my breath found a steady rhythm. “I told you I wouldn’t leave you, and I haven’t.”

  The lantern light fell on three other bodies in the room, plus one in the bed next to me. Emotion rose in my throat at the sight of my still immobile father, looking as if he was merely taking a nap. “Is he any better?”

  “I have feeling in my limbs, but I can’t move them yet. Yet, sweet girl. Yet. Give me time, and I’ll be the strong papa who never stopped adoring you.”

  I fished around for his hand and clung tight to it. “Can you feel that?”

  “In my heart and in my hand, yes. Give me time, Rosalie. I’ll come back to you.”

  I didn’t want to cry, but being knocked out after so much blood loss tends to make a girl prone to emotional outbursts. I took a steadying breath as Kerdik held my head to rest against his chest. His long fingers combed through my hair to soothe me. I glanced down and realized my bloodied dress had been taken, and I was wearing one of Bastien’s long flannel shirts that fit me like a short dress.

  Bastien’s voice broke through the darkness. “Are you going to tell me what happened?” He didn’t sound pissed, but there was a cold calculation to his voice that made me cautious.

  I clung to the hem of Kerdik’s untucked shirt. He was never untucked, so I began to grasp how upset he’d actually gotten. “I was stabbed. Roland threatened me. Said he’d let his crew have a go at me if I didn’t convince my dad to stay in Avalon when Lane and me went back to live in Common. If I didn’t, he said he’d keep my dad frozen how he is now.”

  “I did what now?” Roland’s voice sent a chill through me. One of the figures in the chairs leaned forward into the lantern’s dim light to reveal his confused expression.

  I let out a panicked shriek and clung to Kerdik. “He stabbed me! It was him! Bastien, he’s not the friend you think he is.”

  Bastien stood, turning his head from me to Roland in confusion. “What is she talking about?”

  Roland blew out a loud raspberry. “Do you think I know? I was out in the field all day, erecting the boundary fence with everyone else. You saw me out there.”

  Bastien pinched the bridge of his nose, and then crossed his arms over his chest. “Rosie, I was working with Roland out there. When did this happen?”

  “Just before I called Kerdik. It was him, Bastien. Do you really think I’d confuse Roland with someone else?”

  Roland scoffed. “This is for what I did when we were traveling from the Forgotten Forest. She’s trying to get me hanged for not trusting her!”

  I balked at him, horrified that this was the route he was taking. “If I was trying to do that, don’t you think I would’ve spoken up a long time ago? What, do you think I stabbed myself?”

  He stood next to Bastien, his arms crossed over his chest to mirror his friend’s body language and unite himself with Bastien, as if they were on the same side. “My knife’s been missing all day, so yeah, that’s exactly what I think.”

  The healer whose name I still didn’t know checked my eyes against the lantern light for pupil dilation. He had black skin darker than Reyn’s, and a softness to his gaze that made for a decent perception of good bedside manner. “There’s no way she could’ve gotten an angle like this on herself. What an idiot. Do you think she could stab herself on the back of her thigh?”

  “Exactly!” I realized they hadn’t heard a thing. “Sorry, would you mind writing that down for Bastien?” I met Bastien’s pained eyes. “Do you really think I’d lie to you? Roland did this. He threatened me, somehow he’s imprisoning my dad, and he stabbed me three times!”

  “Do I think you’d lie to me?” Bastien sighed, and I saw how much this very conversation was aging him. I’d wanted to breathe play and life into my boyfriend, but the hard and hurt look on his face told me we were miles from either. “Before the whole reading thing? I wouldn’t have thought you capable of lying.”

  I paled, horrified he was using that against me. “That’s private, and it’s not the same thing!”

  The healer finished scribbling on the pad of paper he kept with him, and thrust it at Bastien. Bastien read it over, and then crumpled it in his palm before bringing his fist to his forehead. His words came out clipped and low. “He has information on how to wake King Urien?”

  I nodded mutely, scared that it all might turn on a dime. When I finally spoke, my voice was quiet but firm. “Bastien, whether you believe me or not, I won’t be under the same roof as someone who’s attacked me this many times. I know he’s your friend, and I’m not asking you to choose, but I’m telling you that I’m leaving. I’ll take my chances with the doctors over in my world for my dad if you don’t believe me. If Roland stays here, I’m out. I’m gone.”

  Kerdik pulled a handkerchief from his pocket, dabbing at the dots of moisture on my cheeks. “You won’t have to do that, darling. Bastien knows what needs to be done.”

  Bastien closed his eyes. “I know.” I jumped when he swore loudly, his fist sinking into Roland’s stomach.

  “Bastien, she’s lying to you!” Roland choked out. “She wants the throne for herself! Can’t you see that?”

  “Damnit, Roland! Rosie hasn’t wanted anything but her family and her life back in Common since she got here. Why’d you have to go there?” He picked up Roland’s knife from the nightstand and slammed it into his thigh. Roland’s howls echoed through the room, lighting my nerves with fresh fear. “Where were the stab wounds, Rosie? One on the left, two on the right?”

  I scrambled to get to him, but I was weak from blood loss. “Bastien, wait! You don’t want to do that.”

  Bastien was in a world unto himself, driven by rage and betrayal. “One on the left and two on the right?”

  My healer nodded to Bastien, using his own legs to show exactly where they were. “Gut the rat. Threatening King Urien and attacking the Avalon Rose? I’ll heal him a thousand times just to watch Bastien stab him over and over.”

  “Stop! Don’t talk
like that. Bastien, no! You don’t want to be this person. You love Roland. Put him in jail, like the criminal he is, but don’t stab him! You wouldn’t survive that.”

  Bastien’s rage flung wide, his eyes wild with grief and heartbreak. “No! I love you, and he knows that. He attacked you even though he knows I’m yours.” He tugged Roland’s hair up and stabbed down into his other thigh.

  “Bastien, she’s lying to you!” Roland collapsed on the floor while my father cried out for Roland’s execution.

  Kerdik was the only rational one in the room, if you can believe it. “You can’t kill Roland, Bastien. If he’s keeping Urien in this frozen state, I need to know how. I could get the information out of him, but my temper might not have the self-control it would need to keep him alive long enough.”

  Bastien was barely sane anymore, but he processed just enough of what Kerdik was saying. Blood dripped from the dagger he clutched, pooling next to where Roland lay howling on the floor. “Mad can do it. He’s known for getting information out of prisoners in Éireland. It’s what he did for his queen’s army before he became Untouchable.”

  Kerdik clutched me, turning my head away from the sight of my cousin bleeding and cursing through his panic and rage. “Very good. Quick, now. My self-control’s not known for lasting long.”

  Someone to Watch Over Me

  The healer, whose name I learned was Jean-Luc, had given Roland something that made him pass out. Then Jean-Luc bound his hands behind his back while bandaging up Roland’s stab wounds. He reasoned it would keep him alive longer, which would make for better sport when Mad got his hands on Roland.

  I was a wreck, not used to torture scenes, and putting the hurt on people to get information. I clung to Kerdik until my fingers were numb and immobile, afraid to be without him while Roland was in the room. Honestly, after being sliced up like Swiss cheese, I was afraid to be alone, period. I was built for the soccer field, not bloodthirsty knife fights.

  Link’s head poked around the corner, his usual pep muted to match the grave ambiance. “Mad’s all set up. Mind if I take out the trash for ye?” He took in my trepidation with actual compassion in his eyes. “Hey, it’s alright, wee Rose. Mad’s grand at this sort of thing. We’ll have your Da dancing a jig with ye in no time.”

  “I don’t like that Mad’s torturing people.” I croaked out, my fragile nerves palpable. “This isn’t the kind of thing that should happen in our province.”

  Link squinted his eye at me, trying to figure out if I was joking. “How else do ye think we should make him sing for us?” He scratched his head, confused. “Didn’t he stab ye over and over? Why are ye putting up a fuss over a little torture? I’d think you’d want front row seats for tha.”

  “I don’t want any of this! I just want to wake up my dad and go home! Lane okayed this? Lane knows what’s going on?”

  Link nodded. “Of course. We couldn’t very well use her dungeon without her knowing.” His eyes traveled to my neck, and then he frowned. “I see ye haven’t taken our mark yet. This useless lump might not’ve messed with ye if you’d been marked as Untouchable.”

  “Roland knows I’m Bastien’s girlfriend, and it didn’t stop him one bit.”

  Link met my scared gaze and crossed the room, eyeing Kerdik furtively before chucking my shoulder. “Take the mark, wee Rose. Bastien needs to know you’re his. He needs to know you’re safe. We all need tha. You’re supposed to keep us lads in line.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “We already lost Meara. Don’t ye know how rare it is for one of us blokes to settle down? T’wont do to lose ye just because ye aren’t marked. Let us protect ye. Untouchables look after our own.”

  I looked up into Link’s green eyes and saw the little lost boy there. I tried to slow my jumping heartrate and see his offer for what it was – need. “You’re a convincing little leprechaun.” I nodded. “I might just take you guys up on the offer. Thanks, Link.”

  Link bobbed his head in my direction, his eyes twinkling that he’d done a solid for Bastien by convincing me to be more permanently his. “Aye. Now, let’s see what I can do about getting this lump downstairs. Get ready to watch me be amazing.” Link slapped his hands together like a football coach, leaned down and hefted Roland up over his shoulders. “How much do ye want to bet that I can dance a jig with him like this on me?”

  “I bet zero dollars. You’re going to hurt yourself! Put him down.”

  “You’re adorable when ye boss me around. Tell me to clean up my socks.”

  “I don’t want Mad torturing anybody.”

  “Aw. Tha’s sweet.” Link started humming to himself, turned and made his way down the hallway with Roland slung around his shoulders.

  I huffed. “Why doesn’t anyone listen to me? This isn’t the way to handle this.” I relinquished my tight grip on Kerdik and swung my legs off the mattress, alighting them on the floor.

  “What are you doing?” Kerdik asked me warily. “I wouldn’t get up if I were you.”

  “This isn’t right. No one’s getting tortured under my roof. This is my house, too, and I say no.” I hefted my body up, and immediately regretted it. My legs were nowhere near sturdy enough to hold me up. My body plummeted to the ground, my knees smashing into the wood and sending ripples of agony echoing up my bare legs. “Oh! Ow!” I swore and pounded my fist to the floor as my wounds reminded me just how fresh they were.

  Kerdik huffed. “Well, I told you not to get up.”

  “Ow! Oh, yeah. That was a bad move. This is the last time I get stabbed. Man, that hurts. Did that healer guy give me something to numb my legs? They feel totally useless.”

  “Jean-Luc did, and yes, they are.” Kerdik slid his arm behind my back, and his other under my knees, sweeping me up off the floor as if I was a child. “To bed with you. I want to take you upstairs, but I can’t very well leave you unattended, and I need to monitor Urien. When Bastien comes up, he can take you to your room.” Kerdik slid me back onto the mattress, giving my toe a playful tug before he covered up my legs with the comforter. “That’s better. Let the Untouchables handle things the way they do. They have better self-control than I.”

  “Somehow I think there’s a better use for self-control than this.”

  Kerdik moved his chair closer to the bedside and sat down in it, leaning forward to examine my fingers. He twisted my ring around and warmed my hand with his. “Whether you’re marked or not, you’re engaged to be married to one of them, and you’re dating another of them. You belong to the Untouchables, and they don’t take assaults on their own lightly.”

  An ominous chill ran up my spine. “I’m not sure how I feel about that. I don’t even know all of them. I only know Bastien, Mad and Link.”

  Kerdik shrugged. “It’s how they work. Luckily, it plays in our favor this time around. If Roland’s really found a way to best me, I need to know what it is, so I can help Urien.”

  “You’re a true friend.”

  “My dad appreciates the lengths you’re going to for him.”

  Kerdik reached out and squeezed my dad’s hand. “It’s nothing either of you wouldn’t do for me.” He took in my tight smile and frowned. “You’re in pain still. Shall I fetch you another healer? Jean-Luc is helping Madigan in the dungeon.”

  “Why would a healer be needed for torture?”

  “To keep Roland barely alive while Madigan works.”

  I balked at Kerdik. “Don’t say it like that! Like it’s all so matter-of-fact and fine. This is wrong! Make them stop, Kerdik.”

  “You’re getting cranky. I’ll get you a healer so you’re not uncomfortable. Remy’s been out with the others building the wall. I’ll have one of the servants fetch him for you.”

  At the thought of Kerdik leaving, panic drove me to reach out and clutch his shirt. “No! You can’t leave us. I can’t walk, and my dad’s still frozen. On a normal day, I could probably defend him, but not if I can’t even use my legs! You can’t leave my dad unprotected. Please don’t leave u
s.”

  Kerdik smiled at me, inching closer. His green face nearly glowed in the soft lamplight. He looked ethereal, like a mythical creature who’d been enchanted by the Queen Elf or something. “How I love when you beg me to stay near you. You’d rather be in pain than be without me for a few short minutes?”

  I bit down on my lower lip as I nodded, not sure if I should be ashamed of that fact, or still more earnest so he didn’t leave. “I don’t care if I sound pathetic. I’ve been stabbed three times. I think that gives me the right to a little whining. Please don’t go.”

  Kerdik stood, and for a second I thought my pathetic debasement would be for nothing. Relief flooded me when he scooped me up off the bed like a fairytale princess and sat back down in his chair, with me cradled on his lap.

  Hamish scampered in, not wasting a moment before he crossed the room. He ran up Kerdik’s leg and threw himself onto my stomach. His arms and legs were spread out like a starfish that clung to my torso. “Don’t make me go down there. I don’t like the howling. Don’t tell Abraham Lincoln I couldn’t take it. Tell him you needed extra protection.”

  “Aw, of course, baby. You can stay with us.” I cuddled Hamish to me, letting him snuggle up and make himself at home. I yawned, turning my head and not bothering to cover my mouth as I lay back in Kerdik’s arms. Though the bed was more comfortable, there was a certain kind of respite that could only be given by the strong arms that held me tight. Kerdik was terrifying, and that night, I knew there was nowhere safer than being curled up in his embrace. I didn’t want to admit to him that I was scared for my own life, that part of me was asking him to stay not just to watch over my father, but also to guard me when I was down for the count.

  Kerdik seemed to understand. Monster that everyone assumed him to be, part of him was capable of compassion and sweetness. Part of him was human, despite his inherent inhumanity. “Get some sleep, darling. I’ll stay right here with you. You’re in need of far more rest if your magic is going to help you heal in a timely fashion.” He sifted through my messy curls with his long fingers, and tugged my head to his face, pressing a kiss to my temple that warmed me down to my toes.