Stupid Girl

by Mary E. Twomey

  Link harrumphed dramatically. “I was sometimes sent to bed without sweets when I was a wee lad. Tha has to get me at least a bite.”

  “You let me be afraid for Bastien while he was out drinking himself into the toilet. You can go hungry tonight.”

  Link slumped next to me, dejected that I wasn’t about to let him off the hook, simply because he was adorable and impish. “You’re still sore about tha?”

  “We’re not talking about Bastien or you.” I turned my attention back to Madigan. “I didn’t realize touch actually hurt you. I’m sorry I hugged you so tight at my coronation. I know I said so before, but I didn’t realize all that went into it. I shouldn’t have been so inconsiderate.”

  Mad shook his head. “And I told ye before, you’ve no need to apologize for tha.” He glanced at my hand. “After tha day, it didn’t hurt when ye touched me anymore.”

  I stared at him, confused at the rules I didn’t fully understand. “Oh, well that’s good to know. Can I… Can I hold your hand then?”

  Mad glanced at me sideways, wary of my offer. “Why?”

  “Because you’ve had a hard day. I want to be your friend, and this is what friends do for each other. If I had a hard day, I’d want someone to care about me enough to sit in a dank cell and hold my hand until it didn’t hurt so much.” I extended my hand, palm up, in case he wanted to take me up on my offer. I knew that if I just reached out and took his hand, Mad would withdraw. It had to be his choice to let me be there for him, or all of this progress would be for nothing.

  It took another minute of me holding my breath, but after a few false starts, Madigan reached out and closed the gap between us. His larger mitt swallowed my hand in his, but for some reason, it finally felt like we were equals. No matter what he’d been through, and what darkness was certain to lie ahead, it was a comfort to both of us that he knew he had me to lean on. I vowed that I would be strong enough and gentle enough to be there for a man as formidable as Madigan.

  My fake fiancé examined my hand in his, turning it over like he was searching for hidden truths in my knuckles. “I don’t know who it was out there who triggered me, or why he’d want me to kill ye. But you’re not safe around me anymore.”

  I bristled at the insinuation that I couldn’t handle myself, or that Madigan was a monster who couldn’t be calmed. “I’m no less safe with you than I am with Kerdik or Bastien or any of the other magical creatures. I’m fine. You barely even hurt me.”

  This brought life to Mad’s stony features. “Pfft. Ye have to know how much shite tha is. I nearly killed ye. As soon as I get myself together, I’ll be leaving Province 9.”

  Our gentle handholding turned into a hard grip from me. “I’ve got the feeling that if Mr. Black Hood wants me dead, proximity isn’t a huge issue. Can’t he just control you wherever you go, send you after me, and that’s that? I don’t think being away from people who care about you is the solution.”

  Link wrapped his arm around my waist and scooted closer. “Listen to the wee lass. Running’s no way to handle this. We can’t hide forever, Mad.”

  Madigan moved his eyes back to the wall. “We wouldn’t be going, Link. Ye would stay here while I go sort out what’s left of the compound. I thought we killed them all, but if someone out there knows my trigger word, I must’ve missed someone. I’m not safe to be around.”

  Link stiffened. “You’re daft if ye think I’m letting ye go off on a spree without me. We’re brothers. Your fight is my fight.” He looked over me to Mad and nodded. “To the death.”

  “If someone survived from the compound, then it just might be your death.” Mad traced his thumb over mine, examining how it felt to be touched and to touch without agenda or pain. “When we became Untouchable, Link and I went back to the compound. We pulled out the wee lads, sent them off with a healer, bolted the doors and burned the rest.” He shook his head. “We should’ve done a count. I assumed they’d all be there because it was the third day of the harvest moon. I shoulda counted the men.”

  Link moved his grip from my hip to latch onto Mad’s tricep. “We’ll find him, brother. One gnat’s nothing to stomp out. But going it alone isn’t the way. If they get ahold of ye, you’ll be the weapon they always dreamed ye would be.” His hand migrated back to my hip and squeezed. “If tha should happen again, the safe word is ‘Meara’. Say her name over and over, and he comes back to himself.”

  I looked from Link to Mad and back again. “At what point am I allowed to ask about Meara? Like, who she is and what ever happened to her?”

  “Never,” Mad ruled. “Ye don’t need another reason to be afraid.”

  Returning Bastien

  We’d progressed to Madigan finally taking a bite from the stew, though I’m pretty sure he only did this to shut Link up. Link grinned when Mad started to eat, and I gathered that Link hadn’t really been after the stew for himself, only to goad Mad into eating. They had a strange friendship, but after all they’d been through, I couldn’t begrudge them a little weirdness. Heck, Judah and I used to do rap battles in our PJs, so no judgement from me.

  When I was satisfied that Mad was enough on the mend that I could take care of business elsewhere, I stood. “Link, if you’ve got things from here, I’m going back out.”

  “Back out where? The only place you’re safe is the mansion, so I’d keep your adventures indoors.”

  “I believe I left my former boyfriend in a puddle of his own puke. Not sure that’s the best place for him.”

  Link hung his head. “Don’t go ending things because he’s had a rough go of it.”

  “There’s nothing left to end. He bailed. He’s told me over and over how much he doesn’t know how to do relationships, and I think I finally heard him.”

  “His mate died after trying to kill his lady. Cut him some slack.”

  I don’t know why this, of all things, made me bristle. As I rolled my shoulders back, I looked down on Link with an unemotional glare that kept my broken heart far from view. “Not to be all dramatic, but I almost died today, and my knight in shining armor was too drunk to give a crap. I don’t need him to save every day, but today? I needed him to save the day today. He knows Mad’s safe word, I’m guessing?”

  Link nodded, while Mad hung his head. “Aye. All the Untouchables know it. We’re the ones who helped train him to respond to it.”

  I shoved my hands in my pockets. “All Bastien had to do was say a word, and he wasn’t sober enough for even that. He’s the one who left me. I’m the idiot girlfriend who’s picking his sorry butt up and dragging him home. I’ll get him sober, and then he can go back to the glorious hermit life he’s been missing so much. I’m guessing no one nags him to stay sober there. Dream come true for all involved.” I held up my hand to stave off Link’s protest. “It’s done. I could barely walk after being stabbed, and he didn’t give a crap. I was so stupid, thinking how selfish I was being that I wanted him home with me instead of rebuilding the wall.”

  Link shook his head. “Rosie, you’re being rash. Ye have no idea what it’s like to be Untouchable.”

  I bit down on my lower lip, but the venom bubbled out of me nonetheless. “You’re right. I wasn’t a child soldier, and I didn’t fight in a corrupt queen’s army. I was only ripped from my parents the second I was old enough to walk, and then taken from my home again to come deal with the mess in Avalon. I was only stripped down and thrown into a well by my mother. I was only stabbed by my cousin after the first time he’d tried killing me on the Cheval Mallet didn’t work. I was only…” I inhaled through my nose, frustrated with myself that I was getting worked up into a tirade. “Everyone’s got a reason to drink themselves stupid! I’m not going to begrudge Bastien his reasons or his choices. But I think I’m worth a guy who can bring himself to utter a single word if it’ll save my life. Not to oversell myself, but I’m worth a man who’ll stick around after I’ve been stabbed!” I started talking with my hands – a sure sign I was too upset. “I shouldn’t ha
ve to even say that! Neither of you are Judah! Neither of you are Lane. I wouldn’t have to explain anything so obvious to anyone who actually gave a crap about me.”

  “Ye don’t understand,” Mad said quietly, towering over me with no sign of his usual intimidation scowl. He looked a mixture of sick and frantic to undo Bastien’s crimes. The Brotherhood loved each other, that was for certain.

  Link opened his mouth to add his two cents, but I held up my hands to stop him. “I don’t need to hear it. It’s fine. Bros before hos. I get it completely. The Brotherhood’s been through a lot. I’m not asking for anything from you two. You can have Bastien back.”

  Link watched me with sad eyes. “Bastien loves ye, Rosie.”

  I managed a shrug I didn’t feel. “Yeah? Then where is he? I almost died today, and where is this almighty prince charming? Is he out picking me flowers so I’ll have something pretty to look at while I heal up? Is he slaying dragons in my name? Is he… Is he laying in a pile of his own puke in the middle of Town Square, mere feet away from where I almost died?” I wrapped myself in a hug I didn’t feel, but knew I needed. “Even before I was a princess, I knew I deserved better than that. And shame on both of you for trying to make me believe I don’t. I love Bastien, but if he loved me, he’d be here.”

  Before Link could convince me otherwise, I spun on my heel and walked out of the cell and down the aisle. I was unwilling to listen to an argument that would only make me feel worse, and somehow leave me even more alone.

  I limped up the steps from the dungeon and ran smack into Kerdik, who had the look of an eavesdropper about him. His arms secured themselves around me, squeezing me tight. “I’ll go out and bring him home,” he said with an air of darkness to him.

  “No. He should be where he wants to be. He wants to be lying in a puddle of his own puke, so that’s where he should be. He’s my responsibility, not yours.” I held my chin up, unwilling to break down. After everything, I wouldn’t let this be the thing that dissolved me into a crying mess. “I swear, I’m fine. I just feel stupid because I thought he was out rebuilding the wall and being all selfless and altruistic. How did I not see this sooner? Am I really that stupid?” My buzz word hit me hard, sinking into my chest where I knew it would truly smart.

  “No, darling. You believe the best in people. That’s admirable, not stupid.”

  I gave a light “pfft.” “Feels about the same on this end. Did you know?” My gaze up at him turned penetrating when I saw the hesitation in his eyes. “You knew?”

  “I didn’t know the extent of it, but yes, I knew he wasn’t out rebuilding the wall.”

  “Where was he? How is the city barely rebuilt, but there’s already a functioning pub?”

  “The people know what they need. They’ve been through a lot. They want a place to drown their troubles in booze and women.”

  For a brief moment, my world stopped turning. “‘Booze and women’? This pub, there’s women there? Like Draper’s kind of women?”

  My brother’s voice sounded from down the hall where he’d come from the kitchen. He chomped down on an apple with a disapproving squint. “Hey, now. I’ve got nothing to do with the tavern in Province 9. They set that up entirely on their own with no help from me. My girls were top shelf in the Lost Village. A lot of the women they have for rent here aren’t the type you’d go visiting twice.” He shook his head. “Rookie mistake. Repeat business was my bread and butter.” He took in my gaping mouth and guessed he’d missed the more important part of the conversation. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

  Kerdik closed his eyes as if Draper’s presence pained him. “I’m sure Bastien was only drinking there. I’m sure he wasn’t sleeping around.”

  “Does Lane know there’s a brothel in her province?”

  Draper shook his head. “Of course not. It only just opened its doors earlier this week. Shutting it down is on my list of things to do, but waking Uncle Urien up took top precedence, don’t you think? I was getting around to it, Ro.”

  My fists clenched at my sides, and I was surprised the earth wasn’t trembling beneath my feet with all the rage that swirled up inside of me. So much for feigning indifference. “Take me to the tavern, so I can see who my boyfriend’s been spending his time in bed with.”

  Draper swallowed a partially chewed bite of his apple, the color draining from his face. “Oh, man. I didn’t realize.” He rolled his shoulders back and lifted his chin. “I’ll go get Bastien, Rosie. I’ll bring him home.”

  “Don’t bother. I’m going. I want to see this thriving enterprise. This is my province, too, right? I should know what’s going on in my own country.”

  Kerdik’s hand on my shoulder only infuriated me. “I’ll go.”

  I shook off his touch, bristling that now he was offering his help. Now he would step up, after everything I’d been going through, being worried about my poor boyfriend overworking himself. “No! You were supposed to be my best friend here. You knew that Bastien was screwing around behind my back, and you said nothing?”

  Kerdik held up his hands in surrender to my swinging temper. “I only knew he’d been out drinking instead of working. You told me I wasn’t allowed to hurt anyone anymore, so I stayed out of it.”

  My glare did its best to cut him at the flimsy logic he offered. I flipped my hair over my shoulder and tried to keep my voice even. “Fine. Come on, Draper. Let’s go see all that Bastien’s been up to.”

  Draper and Kerdik exchanged a wary look, but I was already halfway to the back door.

  A Spanking from Draper

  Draper kept me tight to his side as we stalked through the night in our hooded black cloaks. The lantern in his fist shed the bare amount of light on our path, but luckily, I didn’t trip and injure my janky legs even more. “I think it’s this way,” he suggested, motioning to the left.

  My gut tugged me in the opposite direction. “I think you’re leading us in circles. I think you know exactly where it is, but you’re stalling.”

  Draper let out a deep sigh. “Man, I don’t know how you get me this easily. So much for being a creature of mystery.”

  “I’ve got enough mystery in my life. Time to solve the case of the missing boyfriend.”

  As I suspected, Draper knew exactly where the tavern was. The building had been quickly erected, and lacked a few creature comforts that I’m sure would be added in later. The roughly hewn wood structure looked more like a two-story barn with a bar on the first floor, and stall-like rooms on the second story. Most of the rooms had only three walls, so when you looked up from the main floor, you could see directly into the bedrooms to get yourself a good show while you drank. I gaped at the sight of HBO unplugged going on in four of the eight stalls above me. As if he thought I was six years old, Draper cuffed his hand over my eyes and pressed my nose to his chest to shield me from the rated-R sights.

  I limped over to the bartender and placed my hands on the bar, my hood shrouding most of my face. He had a busted lip, and dark greasy hair pulled back in a ponytail. His mustache was waxed, and looked ripe for twirling, like a true comic book villain. Maybe I was projecting a little, but of all the dudes I’d met thus far, this one looked fit to run a whorehouse. He looked right past me and up at Draper. “Prince Draper, at last.” He motioned to himself before reaching out and shaking Draper’s hand. “I’m Gustav. I was wondering when you’d stop by. You looking for a drink or a girl?”

  Draper didn’t miss a beat. “I’ll take whatever girl Bastien the Bold had last. Can’t go wrong with a girl who’s serviced a warrior.”

  The bartender gave him an evil laugh. “That’ll be Ruby. She just finished with him a few minutes ago, actually, but after she cleans up, I’ll send her down to you. What can I get you and your servant to drink while you wait?” His eyes finally fell to me, but he couldn’t see me seething beneath the black hood that cast a shadow over half my face.

  Draper chuckled, his hand on my shoulder to steady me. “Bastien the Bold
is here, then?”

  Gustav pointed up to one of the stalls that appeared empty. “Came straight here after the upset in Town Square. Had a few drinks, some time with Ruby, and now he’s sleeping it off in one of my beds up there. Not the quietest place in the province, but he seems to need the bed more than most.” He bowed his head to Draper with a smile that made my skin crawl. “We do what we can to keep the Untouchables and royals happy.”

  “Thanks, Gustav. I think I’ll just wait here for a word with the war hero when he wakes.”

  Gustav eyed me, though he could only see my fingers, a sliver of my body where the draping of the cloak gapped, and my chin. “If your servant’s looking for a job while you’re occupied with Ruby, I can set her up with a line of men who’d pay handsomely for a girl who’s not so… seasoned.”

  I’m not sure why that was it, but that little comment crossed my threshold of tolerance. With hands that shook with rage, I tore back my black hood and let my stray curls fall like autumn leaves around my face. My determined eyes met Gustav’s, and I watched with satisfaction as all the color drained from his face. “Say that again. Tell me exactly who you’d like to sell me off to.”

  A drunk guy at the end of the bar held up two fingers. “I’d pay a fair amount for an hour with that.” He got up and ambled past me with all the grace of a toddler, drink in hand while he smacked my butt with the other. He leered down at my breasts, and I saw the glaze of I-won’t-remember-this-night about him. “Nice and bouncy, just how I like them.”

  I didn’t have much patience for being grabbed at. The guys on the teams I played on all understood that. I reached for my quick and anchored left hook, which rarely ever failed me in situations such as these. I swung with too much rage, decking the dude so hard, he dropped his drink.

  Draper was usually a man with total control over his temper, but perhaps that was because I compared most tempers to Kerdik’s, which swung hard and fast in whatever direction it pleased. In a move so quick, I barely saw where it began, Draper had the dude’s head pinned to the bar with a loud crack. The bartender backed up with his hands raised, as if to drop any pretense of ownership over the whole establishment. Draper seethed in the stranger’s ear, “You like my sister’s breasts, do you? You think it’s a good idea to go around smacking young girls wherever you feel like?”