“Billie, we have been waiting in the lobby for more than ten minutes. I’m fed up with your behavior today.” Mr. D.’s jaw was clenched tight. “You are begging for a detention.”
“But I found Alyssa.”
“Well, where is she?”
“In the bathroom.”
“What’s going on here? This is not the time or the place—” He strode over to the door and pushed it open a couple of inches. He stuck his pointy nose right in the crack. “Alyssa Morgan? I want you out in this hallway by the time I count to five. One, two, three—”
“But—” she yelped.
“Four—”
“She can’t come out!” I whispered at him. “She—she—she had an accident!”
He turned to stare at me, letting the door go.
“She’s too embarrassed,” I said.
“I knew I should have had a female staff member on this trip.” Mr. Donaldson looked at his watch. “I’m not happy about this. Just get her onto the bus right away. The rest of the class are buying postcards in the gift shop, and the line to pay is ridiculous. We’ll be out there as soon as I can drag them along.”
“We need our jackets. It’s freezing. Could you send Hubert with our jackets?”
“Right away.”
He took the steps two at a time. I leaned against the wall, trying to steady myself. I could hear Mr. D.’s shoes echoing in the stairwell.
What now? Ohmigod, what now?
The bathroom door eased open.
“Is he gone?”
“Uh-huh.”
“You are such a slimy toad!” she hissed. “You told him I peed my pants!”
“What the heck else was I supposed to say? I couldn’t let him see you, because he can’t see you!”
“You thought of the worst possible—”
Footsteps sounded again on the stairs.
“Quick, go in,” I said. “That’s probably Hubert. Oh, and take off your jeans.”
Before she could say anything, I pulled the door shut and turned around to face Hubert. He was holding my jacket and Alyssa’s puffy silver ski coat.
“Here,” he said, shoving the bundle into my arms. His face was puckered into a glower. “What’s going on?”
“I found Alyssa.”
“So?”
“I found her, but she’s invisible.”
He put his hands over his face. “Oh, rats.”
“Don’t faint on me, Hubert. I need your help, I really do.”
“I’m not in much of a mood to help you, Billie.”
“Hubert, I said I was sorry. And I am. I’m really sorry you got in trouble with my mother. I truly thought I was avoiding that. Maybe it’s not the best time for me to beg favors, but, please, pretty please, imagine the size of trouble Alyssa being invisible is going to get me in. Couldn’t you help us? Please? Come inside.”
“But it’s the girls’!”
“Get over it,” I said, nudging him ahead of me.
“If you think,” started Alyssa, making Hubert jump halfway to the ceiling. “If you think for half a second that I’m going to strip off my clothes—”
“It’s a perfectly good idea,” I said calmly.
“Perfectly stupid, you mean.”
“If you take off your jeans, they’ll reappear, and we can, you know, dangle them from your jacket and make it look like you. Or at least a scarecrow version of you.”
“You are completely sick, Billie!”
You should talk, I thought.
“Can I say something?” said Hubert.
“You came up with the plan most guaranteed to humiliate me,” complained Alyssa.
“Well, none of this would have happened if—”
“Can I say something?” said Hubert again.
“I refuse to walk around in my underwear, even if I’m invisible!”
“Maybe you and Hubert could switch jeans!” I cried. “Then yours would have real legs and—”
Hubert stomped his foot.
“Billie!” he said. “Stop! I am not taking off my jeans, and neither is Alyssa!”
“Way to go! Stand up like a man, Bertie,” said Alyssa.
“All she has to do is get on the bus,” said Hubert. “No one can see her anyway, jeans on or jeans off.”
“The boy’s a genius,” said Alyssa.
“What about when Mr. D. counts heads?” I asked.
“Oh,” said Hubert. “I forgot about that.”
“Just give me my lousy jacket!” shouted Alyssa, snatching it out of my hand and making it vanish. “I’ll meet you on the lousy bus!”
The door disappeared for a second as it whooshed open. Hubert and I were left gaping at each other.
10 • The Haunted
Bus Ride
Hubert and I were galloping up the stairs before you could say invisible. But of course there was no sign of Alyssa.
“Pay attention, people. Line up, please.” Mr. Donaldson was herding the sheep. I grabbed Hubert’s arm, and we ducked out the door to the parking lot.
The driver was leaning against the side of the bus, huddled into his uniform and puffing on a cigarette. The door to the bus was shut.
“Where do you think she is?” whispered Hubert.
“Not on the bus,” I said, looking around for clues. “Oh, this just ticks me off so much! The rest of the kids are going to be here any second. What if this doesn’t work? What if he thinks she ran away or something? What if he calls the cops? What about that, Hubert?”
“Maybe we should call the cops. I mean, seems like she really did steal your bag, huh?”
“Hubert, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. You see why I’ve been acting whack? Do you get it now?”
“Jeez, yeah.”
“Zzzzzssssst!” One inch from my ear came a buzzing like a jumbo mosquito. I swung around and swatted Alyssa.
“Don’t you ever do that again!” I snatched at her and found part of her jacket. The bus driver gave me a nervous look. I smiled at him.
“Could we get on the bus now, please? Medical reasons.”
The driver flicked away his cigarette and pressed the hidden button to open the bus door. My fistful of Alyssa’s clothing gave her no choice but to squeeze up the steps next to me. Mr. Donaldson and the other kids appeared under the arched entrance of the Cloisters.
“I’ll just wait here for J. P.,” said Hubert, lingering outside. “You guys go on ahead.”
I tried not to feel disappointed that he was going off duty. He’d come through with the jackets, after all.
“Thanks,” I said. “But there’s only one of us, remember? From now on.”
“From now on?” whispered Alyssa as I yanked her down the aisle.
“Until I decide otherwise,” I said, trying to sound tough.
I took the window in the back row and made Alyssa drape her jacket over the top of the aisle so it would show.
Mr. D. must have taken Alyssa’s predicament seriously. “Everything okay back there, girls?” he asked, climbing aboard.
“Yes, sir!” I shouted.
“Yes, sir,” squeaked Alyssa when I poked at her.
I guess Mr. D. had told the class to leave us alone, because no one bugged us or even sat near us. People were diving into their lunches, and we had the whole back row to ourselves. I noticed that Hubert was much closer to the front than he had been on the trip up.
As far as I was concerned, Alyssa should have been sitting quietly next to me, apologizing with every breath. But before the bus had gone ten blocks, I felt her move. I reached over and she was gone.
“Alyssa!” I whispered. “Come back here!”
No answer. Oh, she made a girl want to swear!
Then, after a moment, her annoying giggle came from across the aisle.
“Keep your hair on,” she murmured. “I’m right here.”
Suddenly a patch on the window steamed up, like she was blowing on it. Then, magically, she drew a circle.
“Hey
,” I said. “Why isn’t the window disappearing?”
“I’m using the tip of my sweater.”
She made dots for eyes and stroked in a smiling mouth.
“Okay,” I said. “Pretty cool. Now stop before someone sees.” Silently, she added a tongue sticking out of the mouth.
“Ha-ha,” I said. There was a rustle and a scrape as she stood up again.
“Sit down!” I said. I craned my neck over the seat in front.
Suddenly Josh was shouting. “Hey! What? Who took my—” He bounced out of his seat, making a noise like a scared dog.
Mr. D. hauled himself to his feet and glared at Josh.
“I had a bag of Gummi Worms on my lap,” Josh explained. “And they just disappeared!”
“I guess you ate them even faster than usual,” said Mr. Donaldson.
“No, I’m sure, I—”
“There’s a field-trip rule, Josh,” said Mr. Donaldson. “If you bring candy, you bring enough for everyone. Now sit down and put a lid on it.”
I heard a bag crackle next to me. A Gummi Worm landed on my thigh.
“Maybe that’ll sweeten you up!”
“Alyssa!”
But already there was a chorus of “Hey” and “Thanks, Josh!” and “Good aim!” as Gummi Worms flew through the air and landed in people’s laps.
“And two for J. P.!” I heard Alyssa say before she retreated to the seat across the aisle.
Hubert stood up and waved his arms at me. “Billie!” he yelled, as if I had any control! In the confusion, miraculously, he was the only one who figured out what had happened. Then again, I suppose thinking a classmate had suddenly vanished and was now showering Gummi Worms in a bus on the West Side Highway is not the first thing a normal person would guess.
“Should I kill you now?” I asked. “Or do you want to kiss Jean-Pierre good-bye first?”
“Oh, lighten up!” she said, sneering. “You’re about as much fun as a doorknob!”
Ouch. Was that true? I wondered. I’m fun, aren’t I? Or is that why I don’t have so many friends? Am I really Stone-Face Junior?
Alyssa was cackling so loudly that Mr. Donaldson was headed down the aisle. I jumped to my feet and flapped Alyssa’s jacket in the air as a decoy.
“Sorry, sir!” I yelled, before he could come any nearer. “We’ll be quiet, I promise.”
“You sit down,” I hissed at Alyssa. “Sit down, shut up, and count to a thousand.”
I sat down, too, and prayed to wake up from this nightmare.
Finally, the bus turned onto Bleecker Street and came to a stop outside the school. The driver made a beeline for the deli across the street. Mr. Donaldson went up front to shepherd the class off. We waited in our seats until everyone else had left.
“All right, step on it now, girls,” called Mr. D. “Do you want me to phone your mother, Alyssa?”
“No! No, thank you!”
“Don’t worry about her,” I said, inching forward along the aisle. “She was coming to my house anyway.”
“I was not,” muttered Alyssa, a step behind me.
“He doesn’t have to know that,” I muttered back.
“Fine,” said Mr. Donaldson.
I was at the front of the bus now, hovering on the stair. How was Alyssa supposed to get off?
“I must say, Billie,” continued Mr. D., “I do not applaud your method, but your behavior today was quite chivalrous. I’m proud of you for overcoming your differences and aiding a friend in need.”
“Thanks, sir.”
The driver crossed the street, coming back from the deli with a paper cup. He’d probably want his bus back.
“Come on, Alyssa,” I said, in my cheeriest voice.
“Bye, then,” said Mr. Donaldson.
I held my breath until the school doors closed behind him. The bus driver was now in front of me, tapping his foot.
“Sorry to keep you waiting,” I said. “I forgot my backpack.” I fake-tripped a little on the step. He reached out his arm to save me and then took a step back to get out of the way. Alyssa scrambled past me onto the sidewalk. I smiled up at the driver.
“Thanks,” I said.
“Have a nice day,” he replied.
As if there was any chance of that.
11 • Hot Air
What do we do now?” asked Alyssa.
“It’s a good thing we’re back late from the trip,” I said. “Most of the kids are gone, not to mention my mother.”
“Hello? Billie! Remember me? What are you going to do about me?”
I tried to stare at her. I wanted to shoot her a killer look like my mother’s.
“I’m over here, pinhead.”
I was glaring in the wrong direction.
“Could you just tell me the spell or whatever to make me reappear?”
“It’s not a spell, Alyssa.”
“What is it, then? What happens?”
“What’ll you give me to tell you?” Having an enemy was bringing out the worst in me. But, I admit, tormenting her came pretty easily. “I have information. You want information. Have you got any cash?”
“What? I’m supposed to pay you? Forget it, Billie,” she said. “I’m going to follow you around until you fix me back. You told the teacher I’m coming to your place. So I’m coming to your place. And I’m staying till this is over.”
“No way,” I said. “My mother is at my place!”
“Well, we can’t go to my place, Billie, because I won’t be there! Even my mother would notice that!”
“I’m not going anywhere with you, Alyssa. I’m sick of you. And I feel like an idiot, talking to myself in the middle of the street. You stole my backpack, and you stole my makeup kit. I should have you arrested instead of talking to you. Plus, I’m freezing. So good-bye.”
I turned to walk away. I took two steps and heard my name called. But it wasn’t Alyssa.
“Allo, Billie!” Jean-Pierre had come around the corner behind us. He was wearing his adorable, crooked smile and no hat, as usual. How can a boy have such glossy, black curls while I have limp, brown straggles?
“Have you seen Hubert?” he asked. “I am waiting for Hubert.”
“No,” I said, “I have not seen Ooo-bear.”
As cold as I was, I felt sweat under my arms. I knew Alyssa was still nearby, but I didn’t know where, and it was giving me the heebie-jeebies.
“So,” I said, flapping a dumb little wave, “see you around.” I turned and tripped over Alyssa.
“Oof,” she said.
“Oof,” I quickly added, struggling not to fall over.
Jean-Pierre just smiled.
“Billie,” he said quietly. “Don’t go yet. I’m never alone with you, and I wanted to ask—”
Yikes!
“I was wondering—”
What? Wondering what? Oh, shoot, why did Alyssa have to be here?
“Would you maybe like to hang around? With me?”
“With you?” Was he asking me on a date?
“Oof!” I gasped again. “Don’t!” Alyssa had punched my shoulder.
“Oh, please, do not be embarrassed,” he said.
Embarrassed? I was flat out dying. Jean-Pierre was so not like a regular sixth-grader. Josh or David or Victor would never talk to a girl like this. They mumbled or teased. Jean-Pierre was—well, flirting! And Alyssa was listening!
“I know you are a bit shy,” he went on.
“Hah!” squawked Alyssa.
“Ah!” I covered, squeaking like a mouse.
Jean-Pierre looked a little disconcerted, but he kept going. “I like that. Shy and funny, not so pushy as Alyssa.”
My neck exploded in a rush of cold prickles. What was he saying? Oh, shut up, shut up, please!
“You are different,” he continued.
“Ow, stop that!” Another punch. Like it was my fault he had seen the real her in only five days.
“Stop?” said Jean-Pierre.
I pulled myself together
.
“I don’t want to talk about anyone behind her back,” I said just as Hubert came around the corner of the building.
“Hubert! Oh, Hubert, thank goodness you’re here!”
“Allo, Hubert. We have been waiting for you.”
Hubert rocked from left foot to right. He silently quizzed me, his eyes darting back and forth and his eyebrows pushed up, asking where Alyssa was.
“Hubert,” I said, cocking my head in the direction of the last punch. “I’m going home, but I’ll call you later, okay? I have to talk to you.”
“I don’t know, Billie.” Hubert twisted his mouth the way he does when he’s nervous. “I’m going to be kind of busy.” He glanced at Jean-Pierre.
“Yes, call!” said Jean-Pierre. “I’ll be there, too! I’m sleeping over tonight.” He smiled. “It’s good to have girls phone a pajama party, eh, Hubert?”
Hubert looked at me, and I realized we were both blushing.
“Party?” I said.
“Just us,” said Hubert quickly.
Then, as I stood there wishing I was ten miles away, Jean-Pierre’s hair faded and vanished. Alyssa was touching his hair! He clearly felt nothing, and his tan face kept grinning at us.
“Aaay!” yelped Hubert. “Don’t!” I screamed. It wasn’t funny this time.
Alyssa let go. Jean-Pierre looked normal again, but completely confused.
“I have to go,” I said, backing away. “I have to go home right now. I’m late.” I didn’t trust Alyssa for one more second. I wanted to run. I wanted to run till I fell down floppy like an old stuffed bear.
I did run, and pretty fast, too. Down Mac-Dougal Street to Houston, across at the light, and along Houston to Thompson Street.
“Billie! Wait up!” Alyssa’s voice came from quite a ways behind me.
I ducked down Thompson and kept jogging as far as the M&O Grocery at Prince Street. The cold pinched my nose, and my breath came out in little frosty puffs.
Curiosity stopped me short. I could see my breath. I turned around. It was cold enough to see my breath. Could I see Alyssa’s breath, too?
Lots of people were hurrying past on Prince Street, some with shopping bags, some with dogs. I stood there, panting from my run and squinting, trying to see if Alyssa’s breath would announce her arrival.
“Thanks for waiting,” she blurted sarcastically into my ear. I jerked toward the sound.
The Invisible Enemy Page 4