Simple Choices

by Nancy Mehl

  “Trust me, I don’t intend to mention anything about the murder to my family. It’s gruesome and depressing, and I don’t like being the bearer of bad news.”

  “Good.” He patted me on the shoulder and took off toward his cruiser. I watched as he drove away and whispered a prayer for the Muellers and Hannah. After Pat got out of the car and went into the church, I hurried back into the restaurant. Of course, by the time I got back to the table, everyone was getting ready to leave. A small foam box sat where my plate had once been. My cobbler. At least I could take it home and eat it later. Dad went up front to pay for our meal, but Carmen, Hector’s wife, shook her head when he tried to hand her the payment. Obviously Hector had informed her that our lunch was to be a gift. My father put his money back in his billfold, and he and Carmen talked for a few minutes. I waited until they were finished for a chance to say hello to Carmen. She hugged me and told me how happy she was that my family had come to visit. Since she and Hector had taken over the restaurant, Carmen had become one of my favorite people. After thanking her profusely for their generosity, I started to walk out of the restaurant. Before I reached the front door, I heard Jessie call my name. I turned to see her coming my way.

  “Gracie, can I ask you a quick question?” she said, her voice low.

  “Sure. What is it?”

  She took my arm and led me a few feet away. I motioned to my parents to go on. My father nodded and started herding everyone out the door.

  “I’m really sorry to bother you while you’re with your family,” she said.

  “It’s okay,” I assured her. “Is something wrong?”

  She crooked her head just a little. “That man over there. What’s his name?”

  I let my eyes follow the direction of her slight gesture. “Oh, that’s C.J. Bradley, Abigail Bradley’s son.” I noticed the troubled look on her face. “Why?”

  “Well, it’s odd. When I first waited on him, everything seemed fine. In fact, we were having a nice conversation. And then I mentioned Trinity.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  She shrugged. “Me either. When I brought up her name, he asked about my husband. When I told him I wasn’t married, he got real quiet. Now he’s … I don’t know. Cold. Like I’ve offended him. Any idea why?”

  I remembered what Ida had told me about C.J.’s mother. “I think he might have been brought up under rather strict religious rules, Jessie. He may have been a little shocked that Trinity was born … you know …”

  “Out of wedlock?” she finished for me. She sighed. “This town has been so supportive of me and my daughter I guess I’m not used to getting that judgmental attitude. I know God has forgiven me, and that’s what matters most.”

  “C.J. seems like a nice man. Just forget it and move on. I’m sure he’ll come around. Sometimes we have automatic reactions to situations before we think them through. I’ll bet that’s what happened.”

  “I hope you’re right. Having to wait on someone who dislikes me isn’t much fun, but I’ll do it if I have to.”

  “Do you want me to talk to him?”

  She shook her head. “No, but thanks. I’m sure you’re right. He’ll probably get over it.” She gave me a quick hug. “Thanks for letting me talk about it.”

  “Anytime, Jessie. You know that.”

  I watched as she walked away, and then I looked over at C.J. He was busy writing in his notebook and didn’t notice me. He didn’t seem like the kind of person who would be put off by Jessie’s situation, but I didn’t really know him. Besides, it could be Jessie’s imagination. Maybe if it happened again, I’d speak to C.J., but right now, I had other things to deal with.

  I jogged out the door to catch up with my family. Today wasn’t going to be very enjoyable with a murder filling my thoughts. My concern for Hannah had grown every second since she’d gone missing. Finding her bracelet had convinced me she was in trouble but knowing the girl from Topeka had been murdered made me feel even more strongly that she was in danger. After we finished our tour of Harmony, I intended to pull Sam aside and persuade him it was time we took Hannah’s disappearance and recovery into our own hands. I didn’t want to upset Pat, but I was beginning to wonder if someone should contact the media about the missing Mennonite girl. People should be looking for her. And if she really had run away, which I doubted, maybe she would see the report and contact her parents. The more I thought about it, the more sense it made.

  While everyone else waited, I ran into Ruth’s and picked out some flowers. Then we all drove to the cemetery where my Uncle Benjamin was buried. I worried about Papa’s reaction. Would he remember about Benjamin? As we got out of the car, I pulled my father aside.

  “Dad, I’m concerned about Papa. Maybe I should stay with him in the car. What if he doesn’t remember that Benjamin is dead?”

  My father gazed out across the cemetery. “Papa deserves to see his son’s grave. I won’t take that away from him. If he seems too disoriented, I’ll distract him, lead him away. But I have to give him this chance.”

  I wasn’t convinced it was the best decision for Papa, but it wasn’t my business to argue with my dad. Benjamin was his brother and Papa his father. It was his call. We walked past the monuments until we found Benjamin’s grave. Although I hadn’t been there since before I left for Wichita, a bunch of wildflowers had been placed in the cement vase at the base of the engraved stone. Who had put them there?

  “Sweetie and Ida tended to the grave while you were gone,” Sam whispered in my ear, answering my question.

  I nodded, unable to speak. What precious friends I had, and how grateful I felt for them at that moment.

  “‘ ’Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home,’” my mother read on the headstone. She turned tear-filled eyes to me. “And Grace did bring him the peace he couldn’t find on this earth,” she said. “I’m so proud of you.”

  I shook my head. “I only proved what I already knew in my heart: that Dad couldn’t possibly take another person’s life. I only wish Uncle Benjamin had found the truth before he died.” I reached out and took my father’s hand. “His love for you and his desire to protect you kept him from having the kind of relationship two brothers should have had.”

  My father wiped tears from his cheeks. “You know what, Gracie? The older I get, the less it matters what happens in this life. I know my brother and I will have eternity together. And that’s what I cling to.” He looked around at our assembled group. “And that goes for all of you. Even if we have to say good-bye for a while in this life, we are assured that it won’t be for long.” He squeezed my hand. “I’m so grateful to God for His wonderful promise.”

  Papa knelt down on Benjamin’s grave. “I’m grateful, too, son,” he said brokenly. “I can hardly wait to give Benjamin a hug. I know Essie is with him now and that they’re waiting for the rest of us.” He looked up at us. “You know, I’m fully aware that I have one foot in heaven and one foot on the earth. Soon I’ll set both of my feet on that side, and Essie, Benjamin, and I will be there to greet you when you arrive. That will be a great day, won’t it?”

  My father bent down and helped Papa up. Then he wrapped his arms around him. “Yes, Papa,” he whispered. “That will truly be a great day.”

  We stayed at Benjamin’s grave for a little while, and then we walked through the rest of the cemetery. Mom and Dad pointed out the graves of people they’d known. Several times they linked their arms together and wept at the names of people they’d loved. Sweetie knew most of the names and was able to bring my parents up to date on past history—marriages, children, and how people had died. She had some great stories about Harmony residents that I’d never heard before. By the time we finished, I felt even more tied to Harmony. As if I’d been raised here, just like my parents.

  One grave was missing though. John had allowed Abel to perform a small memorial service for his father, more for John’s comfort than to memorialize Jacob Glick. Then Jacob’s
ashes had been scattered somewhere private. John had never shared the location and as far as I knew, no one ever asked. Although he wouldn’t have faced opposition had he wanted to bury Jacob in the Harmony cemetery, John refused. His concerns weren’t for himself but for those his father had harmed.

  We drove back into town to visit the shops. Mom and Dad knew several people including the Menlos who owned Menlo’s Bakery. Papa’s memory seemed clear as a bell while they talked about old times. They all reminisced for quite a while, and Mr. Menlo insisted they try some of his baklava. By the time we left, we had an apple spice cake, a bag full of Mrs. Menlo’s fudgy brownies, and a box of the best baklava I’ve ever tasted. We stopped back by Ruth’s Crafts and Creations, and my father was able to see some of Benjamin’s beautiful birdhouses and feeders. Most of them had been purchased by townspeople, but there were three houses and two feeders left. Dad ran his hand over them slowly. He’d seen the ones I had at the house, but these were brand new, not faded by time and weather like mine.

  Ruth came from behind the counter and stood next to my father. “When you get ready to leave town, you come on by here,” she said softly. “I’ll have these packed up for you.”

  He nodded. “Thank you. If you’ll just make up a bill, I’ll pay you when my wife decides what else she wants.” He winked at Ruth. “I’m glad my car has a big trunk. Looks like she’s buying out your inventory.”

  Ruth shook her head. “You don’t understand, Daniel. I’m giving them to you.”

  My dad started to argue with her, but she grabbed his arm. “Now hush. This is what Benjamin would have wanted, I’m sure of it. I don’t want to hear another word about it.”

  My father, who prides himself on his self-control, paused only a second before wrapping his arms around the stout shop owner. I turned away and concentrated on some hand-painted plates mounted to the wall. I’d cried so many times lately, I was afraid of drying out my insides. We spent quite awhile in Ruth’s and by the time we left, my father’s words had proven true. My mother’s stack of new acquisitions was impressive. I’d shown them some of Hannah’s paintings, and they’d agreed that she was incredibly talented. As I stood in front of the colorful pictures, I couldn’t help but wonder if she’d ever paint again.

  Papa spent most of his time gazing at a display of beautiful quilts, mumbling to himself. When I went to fetch him so we could leave, he grabbed my hand.

  “Now Gracie, have you found Essie’s wedding present yet? She’s gonna scold us both if you don’t find it. It’s really, really important.”

  “I’ll find it, Papa. We’ve still got plenty of time.”

  This seemed to satisfy him, and he followed me out of the shop, first stopping to receive a hug from Ruth. She’d been a young woman when Papa knew her and her parents, and she clearly remembered him, even bringing up times they’d spent together. Even though he pretended to recall the events she mentioned, it was obvious he had no idea who she was. Ruth’s sad expression as she watched Papa leave made my heart ache.

  We spent some time in Cora’s Simple Clothing Shoppe talking to Amos and Cora Crandall. Although they hadn’t lived in Harmony when my parents and Papa were here, it turned out Amos’s parents had. They shared several stories passed down to them and we discovered that Amos’s father and Papa used to go fishing together. Their conversation sparked some animation in Papa’s face. Thankfully he remembered Norman Crandall and could even tell us a couple of big “fish stories” that made everyone laugh.

  My mother grew nostalgic over some of the garments sold at the store and ended up buying two lovely pastel dresses. I had little faith that she would actually ever wear them, but since I had several similar dresses in my own closet, I certainly wasn’t the person to protest her choice.

  We made the rounds of quite a few other places in town, including Joe Loudermilk’s hardware store and the Scheidler brothers’ farm implements store. My mother loved Nature’s Bounty, a shop that sells dairy products, fresh fruits, and vegetables. The store used to be owned by Joyce Bechtold, a woman who had been in love with my uncle. Even though I believe he loved her, too, he’d never reached out to Joyce. Instead, he’d remained trapped, trying to protect a family secret that didn’t need protecting. After he died, Joyce left town, brokenhearted. Now the shop was run by Florence Avery, wife of a dairy farmer who supplied most of the milk, eggs, and cream. Flo was a very nice woman, and my parents purchased assorted fruits and vegetables that Sam and I toted back to the car. Their stash was growing. Hopefully we’d be able to get the trunk closed after loading everything that waited at Ruth’s.

  The last visit on our route was to Ketterling’s Candles and Notions. I could hardly wait to see Sarah and her father, Gabe. My mother pulled me aside before we reached the front door.

  “This is Sarah? The girl you told me about?” she asked quietly.

  I nodded. “Yes, she’s the one who’s in love with Dr. Keystone.”

  I’d told my mother all about Gabe and Sarah and how that although we were now dear friends, my first introduction to Gabe was pretty bumpy. A man hurt by the devastation of losing his beloved wife to an outsider, he’d withdrawn into a world he thought he could control. Unfortunately he’d dragged Sarah into it, too. Thanks to the efforts of a loving community, Gabe had finally come out of his shell and joined the human race—to an extent. His complete commitment to his faith kept certain boundaries strong, including not allowing his daughter to become involved with an unbeliever like John Keystone.

  “Their story is so similar to ours. I feel such compassion for them,” Mom said.

  “Except that you and Dad were both believers. John isn’t. I can’t fault Gabe for not wanting his Christian daughter to marry someone who doesn’t know God.”

  “Does Sarah feel the same way?”

  Dad, Sam, and Papa were busy looking over farm equipment through the Scheidler brothers’ window so we sat down on one of the many benches along the boardwalk.

  “Yes, she believes that she shouldn’t be unequally yoked,” I said. “But she’s also very protective of her father. I told you that his wife, Sarah’s mother, ran off with another man. Gabe’s carried that hurt for a long, long time.” I wiped the sweat off my forehead with the back of my hand. It seemed much hotter now than when we’d started our tour. “Sarah believes if she left her father, it could destroy him. She loves him too much to risk it.”

  My mother sighed and stared off into the distance. “But that’s not her job, Gracie. We need to find our fulfillment from our relationship with God, not from other people. Her father needs to let her go so she can experience the life God has called her to live.”

  “I know, Mom. I tried to tell her, but she doesn’t want to hear it. If I say anything else about it, I could ruin our friendship.”

  The men had finished their survey of farm machinery, so Mom and I got up and followed them to the candle shop. As we entered, Gabe looked up from something he was working on behind the counter.

  “Gracie!” he said, his face breaking out into a big smile. “I heard you were back.”

  He held out his arms and embraced me in a big hug, something he never used to do. I was still adjusting to the changes, although I loved seeing the difference in his personality. Then he approached my father. “You must be Daniel,” he said, holding out his hand. “I knew your brother. In fact, we were friends. I’m so happy to meet you.”

  Dad seemed somewhat taken aback by Gabe’s Old Order attire and customary beard. I was sure it brought back memories from his youth. Gabe and Sarah were one of the few Old Order families left in Harmony. But ever the trouper, Dad quickly regained his composure and took Gabe’s hand.

  “Good to meet you, too, Gabe. I’ve certainly heard a lot about you—and your daughter.”

  I quickly made the rest of the introductions. When I got to Papa, Gabe nodded. “My family and I moved here shortly before you and your wife left Harmony,” he said to Papa. “I’m sure you don’t recall me, but I cert
ainly remember you. You were very highly thought of in this community. I’m honored to see you again.”

  Papa took his hand and smiled, but the blank look was back. He stared at Gabe’s clothing and beard and frowned. I wondered if he was also remembering the past. But whatever his thoughts, he kept them to himself.

  “I still remember coming here when Levi Hoffman ran this store,” Dad said. “We bought candles and lanterns for our home. Levi was a good friend of our family.”

  Gabe nodded. “He was a good friend to many people here. What happened to him was sad. I hope someday he’ll return to Harmony. People in this town still pray for that day.”

  “Yes,” Dad said. “We pray for that, too.”

  Just then the curtain that separates the main shop from the rooms in the back parted and Sarah entered the room.

  “Gracie!” she said, laughing. “I’ve been waiting for you.”

  I ran over to the beautiful young woman in the dark dress and apron, her raven-colored hair tucked under her prayer covering, and hugged her tightly. I was startled to feel her bony frame under my grasp. She looked even thinner than she had before I left.

  “I’ve missed you so much,” I said, feeling somewhat emotional. Sarah was my very best friend in Harmony. An Old Order Mennonite and a very modern girl from the big city. Strange combination, but somehow it worked.

  She finally let me go and stepped back to smile at me. “I’ve been keeping up my cooking lessons with Sweetie. I think I’ve passed you by, you know. Will you be ready to begin again soon?”

  “I think we can work in one more lesson before the wedding. Can I call and let you know when? I really need the rest of this week to go over wedding plans and spend some time with my family.”

  Sarah looked at her father. “That would be wonderful as long as Papa will let me take off some time from the shop.”

  Gabe’s eyes crinkled with amusement. “Saying no would only hurt me in the long run. I’m the one benefiting from your lessons.” He patted his stomach, which was flat as a board. “I may have to go on a diet if this keeps up, but it’s worth it. Sarah is becoming quite the cook.” His face lost its jovial look for a moment. “Can’t figure out why I keep gaining weight and she seems to be losing it though. Doesn’t make sense.”