She Ain’t the One

by Mary B. Morrison

  “Sure, Mrs., Ms…. Ashley,” Jay answered, looking unsure.

  “That’s good that you love my daughter but please be careful, that and take excellent care of Ashlee. My daughter is special and she has a tendency to forget things when she doesn’t take her—”

  “Mother,” I hissed, between clenched teeth, “whose side are you on? I can handle my man just fine. Thank you very much.”

  Mother did a sexy hunch, then said, “In that case, I’m sure you’ve told your man all about your son. Whose father is your brother?”

  Jay’s hairline collapsed to his brows and nobody spoke for at least five seconds.

  “You got a son? By your brother?” Jay questioned, clamping his hands above his dick. He leaned back in his chair, adjusting his slacks to give space to his crotch. Fortunately before Jay commented his phone rang and our food came.

  I couldn’t believe my mother was sneaking a peep at my man’s dick as he pushed back his chair.

  “Excuse me,” Jay said, answering his phone. “Hello…Uh-huh?…No, I’m not busy…What?…Where are you?…Don’t be crazy…Sure, I can be there in fifteen minutes…Of course I’m on my way…Thanks, I really appreciate this…Bye.”

  Before he was halfway out of his chair, I grabbed Jay’s arm. “Baby, who was that? Where are you going?”

  Shaking his head, Jay tossed his white linen napkin onto the table. “I gotta go. I’ll call you later.”

  Although I felt like screaming, Sit your ass down! I said politely, “Jay, honey, I’ll bring you your food.”

  Jay’s cold eyes narrowed directly into mine, making every hair on my body rise to a chilling fright. I froze. His lips tightened with anger as he reiterated, “I said, I’ll call you later. Obviously, we’ve got some things to talk about.” Facing my mother, Jay respectfully said, “Have a good evening, Ms. Anderson.”

  Heartbroken by Jay, pissed off at my mom, I looked at my mother and said, “Now I get it. I’m a constant reminder of all the things you despise about my father. That’s why you never once objected to me living with my father after the divorce. And that’s why you disapproved of me dating Darius, ’cause Darius was a constant reminder of my dad’s marriage to Darius’s mom.”

  And that’s why no matter what I did right, in my mother’s eyes I would forever be my father’s daughter, not hers.

  Exhaling, Mother folded her arms and said, “You’re right. Satisfied? Now here’s where you get either passive or aggressive, exactly like your father. Go ahead, honey. Let me have it.”

  Questioning whether my mother was jealous of me, I swallowed hard, hating her for ruining my should-have-been perfect dinner and possibly destroying the best thing that’d ever happened to me—my relationship with Jay.

  Leaning across the table, I dug my hand into a crab cake, smearing it on my mother’s face.

  Backing away, Mother yelled, “Are you crazy, Ashlee? See, this is what happens when you don’t take your medication. I didn’t mean for you to do this.” Mother peeled away lumps of crabmeat from her eyelashes.

  I hissed, “Mother, you’d better pray Jay doesn’t break up with me tonight. ’Cause if he does I’ll be knocking on your hotel door with more than a damn crab cake.”

  CHAPTER 15

  Jay

  I was on my way home when my phone rang for what seemed like the millionth time. Instead of ignoring it like I’d been doing since I left Legal Seafood this afternoon, I answered it because I knew this time it wasn’t Ashlee blowing up my phone. I knew this because her ring tone was Lil’ Kim and Fifty Cent’s “You Got the Magic Stick” and the tone that was ringing was Fifty’s “P.I.M.P.,” the ring tone for my boy Kyle.

  “What up, dawg?”

  “Just checking up on you, player. What’s going on?” Kyle asked.

  “Man, life is beautiful. I just spent the afternoon with my son Jason and Tracy.”

  “Hold up, man. How’d you do that? I thought Tracy was MIA.”

  I could hear the surprise in Kyle’s voice. “Damn, I didn’t tell you? I ran into Tracy a couple of months ago in the airport. She was with some dude she called her boyfriend who’s supposed to be helping her with her music. Old girl wouldn’t even give me a number or anything. I had to damn near beg her to take my card.”

  “Man, now, that’s cold.”

  “Who you tellin’? I’d pretty much written off seeing them, but today Tracy just calls me up and asked me if I wanna meet her and Jason in the park. Kyle, man, it was like watching a little me. The boy’s a natural athlete, just like his old man.”

  “Man, I can’t tell you how happy I am for you. So, what you gonna do with that girl Ashlee? I guess you gonna kick her to the curb now, huh?”

  “Kick her to the curb? That’s my girl, Kyle. I love Ashlee.” I did still love her, even though I had plenty of questions after what her mother told me at lunch today.

  “My bad, but you love Tracy too.”

  There was silence on the line for a minute while I thought about what he’d said. “True that. I’ll always love Tracy. She’s my son’s mother, but she got a man. She made that very clear today, and you better believe I’m not crossing that line because I wanna continue to see my son. Besides, like I told you, I love Ashlee. I’m not going to do anything to hurt her.”

  “Hey, can I ask you a question?”

  “Yeah, sure.”

  “Is this Jay Crawford? ’Cause the Jay Crawford I know is not this sensible.” We both laughed.

  “Yeah, well, I’m getting wiser with age.”

  “Good.”

  Kyle and I talked for a little while longer about my other kids, his kids, sports, and what was going on up North. We ended the call with the promise that he and his wife would come down for a visit in the next few weeks. The only thing we didn’t talk about was the comment Ashlee’s mother made right before I left the restaurant.

  Truth is, I hated to leave in the middle of my first meeting with Ashlee’s mom, but I felt that finally spending time with my son was an opportunity that shouldn’t be missed. Otherwise, I would’ve stayed right there at the table, listening to Ashlee’s mother spilling her guts on her daughter. Three months into the relationship, and I never had a clue about Ashlee having a kid. Her mother obviously thought I knew, because she spoke freely. I imagine Ashlee was ready to crawl under the table. “What’s done in the dark soon comes to light,” I said out loud with a smirk. Then again, who the hell was I to judge when I needed to find a way to tell Ashlee about my little secret—Jason?

  I pulled up to my place and thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. I did a double take, and there stood Ashlee, leaning against my door with her arms folded. I’m gonna catch it now, I thought. Then again, maybe not. She’s got a lot of explaining to do, too. I still couldn’t get it out of my head that she might have had a baby with her brother. I got out of the car and walked up to her.

  “How long you been—” I started.

  “Shh,” she interrupted, placing her finger on my lips. “Don’t say anything. Just let me explain.”

  I nodded. “Aw’ight. Go ahead.”

  She had a sincere look in her eyes. “Jay, I wanna apologize for not telling you about my son. I wanted you to know, but I was embarrassed at not having custody of him…which is another story within itself—one I wasn’t sure you’d understand,” she said, pausing after every three or four words to kiss me.

  “What I wanna know is, is your baby’s father your brother?”

  She stopped kissing me for a second, then answered, “No…well, yes…kinda.”

  My eyes lit up. “Kinda?” I was starting to feel a little nauseated.

  “He’s my stepbrother through marriage. We’re not related by blood. My mother has a tendency to blow things out of proportion.”

  “Ooohhhh, I see. Well, I’m not gonna lie, she does a great job.” It was all starting to make sense. From what I could tell, Ashlee’s mama was a true-life drama queen.

  “Jay, I love you, baby. Can y
ou forgive me, please? I know I should have told you and I’m sorry.”

  Ashlee groped between my legs and kissed my neck. I wanted to scream, Yeah, I forgive you. I got another kid too. But I wanted to make her sweat a little first. Her sex during the times we weren’t mad was the bomb. I could just about imagine she’d cause an explosion between the two of us as she desperately tried to make up. So, instead of answering her question, I allowed her to fondle and cling to me while I unlocked my door. I backed her into the living room, then peeled her arms away from me. At first she looked puzzled, but then she came at me and forced her tongue deep into my mouth. My dick damn near busted out of my pants.

  I’d had enough of trying to play hard. I gripped her ass, then kissed her back. Before I knew it, she climbed up on me and wrapped her legs around my waist. Her skirt rose above her hips, revealing that she wasn’t wearing underwear, and exposing the neatly shaven pussy I’d fallen in love with. She began grinding on me as we continued to savor each other’s tongues. She drove me crazy when she began licking my ear.

  “Let me feel you, Daddy,” she panted. “Unzip your pants and fuck me now.”

  “Hold on, baby. I got you,” I said, carrying her into the bedroom.

  I placed her down on the bed, then went over to my dresser. “What are you doing?” she asked, jumping off the bed.

  “Getting a condom.”

  “No, you don’t understand. I want to feel you,” she said, unbuttoning my shirt.

  I was surprised at her request. “What? Are you on the pill?” I asked.

  “Yes, baby. Ortho Novum, and I take ’em faithfully,” she responded, tongue-fucking my ear.

  I kept thinking we shouldn’t take our relationship to the next stage, but Ashlee wasn’t making it easy for me to decline her. Going to the level of having unprotected sex meant I needed to really trust her. I didn’t want three baby mamas and four kids. At the moment, all I knew was that I loved Ashlee, and she had ways of making me weak. She began licking my chest, easing her way down to my nipples. When I dropped my pants to the floor, she fell on her knees almost simultaneously. Her tongue was wet and warm on my skin, as it had been in my mouth. I ran my fingers through her hair and guided her head toward my throbbing dick. Watching Ashlee softly kissing the head made precome seep onto her lips. As she backed away, the sticky fluid clung to her wet lips.

  “You taste like chocolate, baby. Um, I love chocolate.” Her beautiful brown eyes looked up at me as she proceeded to give me a blow job to die for. Normally I wouldn’t want a woman eyeing me while giving me head, but Ashlee was different. No, Ashlee was special.

  She pushed me down on the bed to continue her oral deed. When I was ready to return the favor, she shook her head, moaning, “No, baby. I want you to be serviced.” She pushed me back down, then did the sexiest catwalk as she crawled on top and mounted me. My body repeatedly jerked from the impact of having her wet, pulsating pussy on my dick. As I closed my eyes, sweat dripped, then poured from Ashlee’s body onto mine as her hips gyrated in slow motion. She whispered, “Don’t move, my love. Let me pleasure you.” I swear, it took everything in me not to bust my biggest nut ever inside her before we were both ready.

  Ashlee let out sighs and moans that were louder than I’d ever heard from her. She rode me fast and furious, making it more difficult for me to hold back. I knew I had better flip things so I’d control what was going on. I turned her over. She spread her legs from one side of the bed to the other, making sure I had plenty of room to dive in. But when I decided to go nose first, she went crazy, barely able to keep her legs open. I didn’t let up on her until she was begging for mercy.

  My dick was so hard it had begun to throb. As she lay there gasping, I stuck it to her fast and furious like she’d done with me. I knew she wanted it rough because she began to grind just as hard as I was laying the pipe. When she started calling out my name, I knew she was close. Then I felt it. The gripping was so strong I couldn’t hold back. The fact that she kept screaming, “Come with me, Daddy” didn’t help either. I gave it all to her, then collapsed, barely able to breathe.

  I managed to roll off Ashlee before smothering her with my deadweight. She was obviously worn out, because she was asleep within minutes of reaching our climax. After catching my breath, I turned over to watch Ashlee sleep. She looked strikingly beautiful. Her skin was smooth and even-toned. I laughed to myself when I thought about how she waited outside for me to get home, thinking I was mad at her. She went to extra lengths to prove she wanted to make up for her dishonesty. My conscience began to weigh on me about my own deceit, so I woke her up to talk.

  “Ashlee,” I called. “Ashlee, baby, wake up.”

  She grunted. “Why? What time is it?”

  “It’s not about the time, baby. I wanna talk to you about something. I need you to wake up.”

  “Ugh. Okay. I’m up. Talk.”

  “First, let me say I was surprised to see you standing outside my door this evening. I’m not sure how long you were out there, but if you were outside for two minutes, that’s one minute longer than I would’ve endured.”

  “Oh, I wasn’t going anywhere until I saw you and had a chance to make things right between us,” she said.

  “Thanks for being so dedicated. I also want you to know that from now on, you don’t have to stand outside my door.”

  “I don’t?” she asked in a comical tone. “Why not?”

  “Because the key hanging in the kitchen labeled ‘spare key’ is yours. I want you to have it. That way I can show some dedication back to you.”

  “Sweetheart, I don’t know what to say. I guess I should start by saying thank you,” she said, then leaned in to kiss me, sticking her tongue out first.

  “Wait, Ashlee. There’s more we need to discuss.”

  She slid back down in bed. “Sure, baby. I’m listening.”

  “Ashlee, I was disappointed to hear you’d been keeping your son a secret from me.”

  She nodded. “Jay, I know. And I meant what I said about being sorry for hiding that part of my life from you. But I thought we were moving on. What can I do to make you forgive and forget?” she asked, reaching to grope my dick. “Can’t you forgive me?”

  “Yes, I can. But only if you can forgive me too,” I stated with my tone fading.

  Ashlee sat up in bed. “I don’t get it. Forgive you for what?”

  “Ashlee, there’s something I should’ve told you,” I said, pausing to take a deep breath. “I have a son too.” I looked down to avoid the shock in her eyes. “His name is Jason, and he’s three years old.”

  She was quiet for a minute. I wanted to look up at her reaction, but I was afraid I’d see disappointment. She shifted several times as if she was trying to figure out the best way to say what was on her mind. I sat silently, awaiting her response.

  “This is so crazy. I can’t believe this. Here we are…two people in love…together for three months…yet we’ve never felt comfortable enough to tell each other the truth before now.” She paused and sighed. “Where is your son, Jay?”

  “He lives with his mother here in D.C. She’s a woman I was seeing at a rough time during my marriage. I actually fell in love with her, which took me by surprise because I wasn’t even in love with my wife when I married her.”

  Ashlee sighed deeply. Then tears fell down her cheeks. Her voice broke as she spoke. “So now what? How do I know you’re not in love with her now? Before I know it, she could convince you to go off and be with her for the sake of family. I don’t wanna get hurt, Jay.”

  “You won’t.”

  “How do I know you won’t hurt me!” she asked in more of an exclamatory tone than a question.

  I pulled Ashlee close to me, then softly kissed her lips. It pained me to see her cry. I wiped her face, then kissed her several more times. “She’s moved on with her life, Ashlee. She has a man she says she loves dearly, and he’s even helping her raise our son, which I’m not happy about. But I’m forced to de
al with it. And besides the fact that she’s moved on, so have I. I love you, Ashlee. I just told you that you can have a key. Doesn’t that prove something?”

  She continued to cry. “Jay, I wanna know I haven’t lost you. You make me happy, and I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

  “Ashlee, you haven’t lost me. You found me, and I found you, remember? And I’m happy. No more secrets. I promise. I just need to hear the same from you.”

  She sniffed. “No more secrets. I promise.”

  “Good. Now dry those tears. I know it may be a little tough right now, but I only wanna see you smiling.”

  Ashlee put on the best smile she could muster, which wasn’t very much, but I accepted it. I held her tight and began to gently stroke her back. After several minutes of silence had passed, she pulled away.

  “I’m okay, Jay. Thanks for having that talk with me. I’m tired. I think I’m ready to go back to sleep now.”

  I kissed her forehead. “Okay, sexy,” I responded.

  She turned over. We lay motionless with our backs to each other. Though Ashlee was quiet, I knew she wasn’t asleep. I could sense all was not right with her, and I felt helpless not knowing what to say or do to make things better. I could only hope our sudden revelations hadn’t destroyed her ideas and future plans for us, but time would have to tell. I couldn’t be sure of what Ashlee was feeling at the moment, and I was left with a thought of what next?

  CHAPTER 16

  Ashlee

  After Jay confessed about Tracy and his son, I couldn’t sleep. My stomach was in knots. I tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable, but I couldn’t. I lay in the bed, with my back to Jay; my eyes were wide open. I stared into complete darkness praying my relationship with Jay wasn’t over. Lifting the satin sheet, I eased from under Jay’s heavy arm, sat on the edge of the bed, and prayed he’d stay asleep. When Jay didn’t move, I quietly left his bedroom and stepped into the living room. Slowly twisting the knob, I pulled the bedroom door shut behind me, carefully releasing the handle.