The Guardian
Page 15
“Having the groom say his vows with the point of a dirk in his back is not what a lass dreams of when she imagines her wedding day.”
Ian’s expression turned serious. “I’ll make it all up to ye. The ring is just the start.”
Looking into Ian’s eyes was like being pulled into the sea—and she wanted to go wherever the current took her.
“I’m ready to be a good husband to ye,” he said, taking her hand. “Tell me ye want to be my wife.”
“I do.”
Ian took the ring from her hand and slipped it onto her finger.
“It looks good on ye,” he said, and raised her hand to his mouth. His lips were warm and soft on her fingers, reminding Sìleas of how they had felt on her belly.
She swallowed. “I have a gift for ye as well.”
When his eyebrows shot up, she was pleased that she had surprised him. She pulled the crystal out of her pocket and held it out for him to see. It was no bigger than her thumb and a lovely misty color that was like seeing a green sea through a thick fog.
“Do ye know what it is?” she asked.
“A wee stone?” Ian said with a grin.
“It’s a charm stone,” she said in a hushed voice. “The MacDonald Crystal.”
“I thought it was lost.” He took it gingerly between his fingers and held it up, trying to see through it. “Isn’t this the one they say was brought back from the Holy Land by Crusaders?”
“Aye. My grandmother had it.” Sìleas dropped her gaze to her hands resting in her lap. “Ye see, she didn’t like my father, and she knew my mother was weak. To keep it out of his hands, she gave it to the old seer to save for me. Teàrlag gave it to me after I came to live with your family. She says it protects the wearer.”
“Then ye must keep it.” Ian put the crystal in her hand, then closed his hand over hers.
Sìleas met his gaze and shook her head. “Ye tell me ye will protect me, and I believe ye. But who will protect you? This is my wedding gift to ye, and so ye must take it.”
It was the most precious thing she owned. By giving it to him, she was showing him that she trusted him with her life—and with her heart.
“I will guard it and you,” he said, meeting her eyes.
“Teàrlag made this pouch to keep it in.” She pulled the leather thong from her pocket. “She said words over it to enhance the strength of the crystal.”
Sìleas did not add that Teàrlag told her that if she slept with it next to her own heart first, his heart would remember hers. She hoped it was true.
When she opened the pouch for him, Ian dropped the crystal inside it. Tears stung at the back of her eyes as she reached up to put it around his neck.
She placed her hand over the pouch, where it rested over his heart.
“I can feel your heartbeat through it,” she said, looking up at him. “Keep it close and be safe for me.”
Ian gathered her in his arms. His breath was warm in her ear as he whispered, “Thank ye, Sìleas.”
They held each other for a long while.
Then Ian kissed her softly and said, “I’ll come to you tonight, then.”
“Aye. Tonight.”
Tonight. The start of their new life together.
CHAPTER 19
“Such a lovely babe Annie has,” Sìleas said, as she walked arm in arm with Beitris on their way home from their visit to the neighbors. “Niall, it was sweet of ye to come with us.”
Ian had planned to accompany them until Payton asked him to practice in the yard. It would be Payton’s first attempt to use his claymore since his injury.
“You’re looking happy today,” her mother-in-law said, and winked at her. “Maybe you’ll have a babe of your own to show off by this time next year.”
Sìleas’s heart lifted at the thought. Beitris had guessed that everything had changed between her and Ian—and was almost as happy about it as Sìleas.
When Niall gave her a searching glance, she blushed. She wasn’t about to tell Niall that she and Ian were going to start sharing a marriage bed, though he and the rest of the household would know it by morning.
“Ach, look who’s coming,” Niall said with a sour look on his face.
It was Gòrdan, and he was marching straight for them, looking like a man with something on his mind that would not keep. Sìleas took in a deep breath. She had feared they would see him, coming or going, since they had to walk past his house to get to Annie’s.
“ ’Tis best to set him straight,” Beitris said in her ear just before Gòrdan reached them.
“Beitris. Niall.” Gòrdan gave them each a brief nod. “Sìleas, may I have a word with ye? It’s important.”
“We’ll walk slow,” Beitris said to her. “Ye can catch up to us when you’re done with your chat.”
Gòrdan gave Sìleas a warm, hopeful smile that made her feel wretched. Beitris was right—’twas time to tell Gòrdan that things were settled between her and Ian. Gòrdan was a good man, and she owed him that.
“I can’t go out walking with ye anymore,” she said. “I’ve made my decision to stay with Ian.”
“Say ye don’t mean it.” His eyes were wild as he gripped her arms. “Tell me it’s not too late, that ye haven’t given yourself to him yet.”
She flushed, remembering all the things Ian had done to her. Though she was still a virgin, she had, indeed, given herself to him.
“Ian doesn’t deserve ye,” Gòrdan said. “He doesn’t love ye as I do.”
Ach, he was not making this easy. “Ian says he’s ready to be a good husband to me, and I believe him.”
“With his pretty face, Ian can have any of the lasses,” Gòrdan said, waving his arm out to the side as if there were a line of women standing there. “But you should have a man who sees ye for the special woman that ye are.”
She didn’t want to hurt him, but softening the message would not help Gòrdan accept it.
“Ian cares for me,” she said.
“Is that what he tells ye?” Gòrdan said, raising his voice. “It hurts me to see ye believe his lies.”
“Stop it, Gòrdan. I know ye are upset, but you’ve no cause to call Ian a liar.”
“You’ve always had a weakness for Ian, and it’s made ye blind,” he said, shaking his head. “What Ian values ye for is your lands.”
“No. That’s not true.”
“He’s come back to Skye to help Connor take the chieftainship.” Gòrdan’s voice was rough with emotion. “That’s all this is about.”
Icy fingers of doubt crept over her heart. “No, Ian wants to be my husband.”
“Is that why he stayed away five years?” he asked. “Ye know Ian would do anything for Connor, and Connor wants your castle back in MacDonald hands.”
“What are ye saying, Gòrdan?”
“The four of them—Connor, Ian, Alex, and Duncan—held a secret meeting last night in the church.”
A shiver of fear went up her spine. “What about? Are they going to fight Hugh?”
“Connor is a clever one. He knows it’s too soon to challenge his uncle directly,” Gòrdan said. “Instead, he has Ian—as your husband—be the one to call on the men to take Knock Castle.”
Why had no one told her of the plan to oust her stepfather from her castle? Why had Ian not told her? Instead, he’d led her to believe he’d spent the night drinking with Connor and the others.
“The four of them have it all planned out,” Gòrdan said, raising his arms. “They know how much losing Knock Castle hurt the clan’s pride. Men came last night because they are angry that Hugh has not called for an attack. They all went home believing that unlike Hugh, Connor would never turn his back while our enemies took what belongs to us.”
“Connor wouldn’t,” she said in a low voice.
“I’m telling ye,” Gòrdan said, “the whole purpose of taking Knock Castle is to rally the men into supporting Connor for the chieftainship.”
Sìleas felt like her throat was closing. H
er voice came out high and tight as she asked, “Are ye saying this meeting was last night?”
“Aye.”
And Ian had come back this morning with a ring, saying he didn’t want to wait another night to be her true husband. She felt as if she were standing on the edge of a sandbar with the sand sliding out from beneath her feet.
“Connor needs a man with a husband’s claim to justify the attack,” Gòrdan said. “That is the reason Ian is claiming ye now.”
In the back of her head, she heard Ian’s voice. There is nothing I would not do for Connor.
Still, she said, “That doesn’t mean Ian doesn’t care for me.”
“What Ian cares about,” Gòrdan said, “is being the hero who saved the clan by putting Connor in the chieftainship.”
His words rang true in her heart, for she knew Ian had a burning need to redeem himself.
“Just because Ian wants to help the clan doesn’t mean that’s the only reason he wants to be my husband.”
“I’m telling ye,” Gòrdan said, “Ian wants ye so he has the right to claim your lands and castle.”
“That wasn’t enough to make him want to wed me five years ago, and I was heir to Knock Castle then.” She could hear the desperation in her voice.
“That was before Flodden. Before Connor’s father and brother died. Before Hugh Dubh took the chieftainship.” Gòrdan hit each point relentlessly. “And it was before Connor had a chance at becoming chieftain.”
She shook her head because she didn’t want to believe it.
“Connor ordered Ian to take ye to bed, so he would have a husband’s right to take Knock Castle,” Gòrdan said. “I heard Connor say it.”
I’ll do whatever it takes, for the sake of the clan. There is nothing I would not do for Connor.
“Ian told Connor not to worry, he would ‘take care of it.’ ”
She felt her checks flush with mortification.
“Ye know I’ve never lied to ye,” he said.
“I won’t hear this,” she said, backing away from him.
“You’ve been a fool for Ian for five years,” Gòrdan said. “I’m begging ye, don’t be a fool for him for the rest of your life.”
The long years of waiting still hurt. And for certain, Ian had not been faithful to her while he was in France. Did a ring and a few soft words make up for that?
“For God’s sake, Sìleas, open your eyes and see the man for what he is.” Gòrdan drew in a deep breath and blew it out. “If ye change your mind, I’ll be waiting.”
Her lip trembled as she watched Gòrdan turn away and walk up the path toward his home. No, she would not believe it. She knew Ian’s heart. He wouldn’t deceive her.
But as she ran toward the house, all she could remember was that Ian had not once told her he loved her.
CHAPTER 20
Ian hummed to himself as he poured the second pot of boiling water into the tub. In a wink, he stripped and tossed his dirty clothes into the corner, then settled into the steaming water with a long, satisfied sigh.
Tonight. Tonight would be the night he consummated his marriage and tied Sìleas to him for life. He wanted it all to be perfect for her. Of course, he couldn’t be sweet-smelling like Sìleas, but at least he would be clean for her. He’d bring a flask of wine up to their bedchamber and set the room ablaze with candles.
He rested his head against the back of the tub and smiled to himself, thinking of the night ahead.
Damn. Was that the front door opening? With his da asleep and everyone else gone to see the neighbors’ new babe, he expected to have the house to himself a while longer. Ach, he’d best get down to business before the women came into the kitchen to fix supper.
He sat up and scrubbed his face. After he dunked his head in the water to rinse the soap off, he felt fingers in his hair.
“Sìleas,” he said, smiling like a fool with his eyes closed and water streaming down his face.
She laid her hands on his shoulders, and he sighed as she slid them down his chest. But something was not quite right… He sat bolt upright and spun around—and discovered it wasn’t Sìleas who had her hands on him.
“Dina. What are ye doing here?”
“What’s this?” Dina snapped the cord that held the crystal over his head before he could think to grab her arm to stop her.
“Ye need to leave—ye can see I’m bathing.” He held his hand out. “Give that back to me before ye go.”
She swung it in front of him, just out of his reach, then laughed and put it around her neck. “This would be a lovely gift for ye to give me in return for what I’m going to give ye.”
“We’re not giving each other anything, Dina,” he said, losing his patience with her. “Now give that back to me.”
“You didn’t ask what I was going to give ye.” She ran her finger down the cord to where the pouch that held the crystal lay in the cleavage between her breasts.
“By the saints, Dina, what do ye think ye are doing?”
“I couldn’t help noticing ye been sleeping in the old cottage,” she said. “Seems a shame to sleep alone, when ye don’t have to.”
“I’m not interested in what ye are offering,” he said. “Now give me that and go.”
He leaned forward and grabbed a handful of the skirt of her gown and pulled. “Give it to me.”
She must have unfastened her gown already, because she stepped out of it as the damn thing came away in his hands. He looked up from the gown clenched in his fingers to see her standing in her chemise. Then, before he could say a word, the chemise was off.
Now, he was a man. He didn’t mean to look. She wasn’t the woman he wanted. But Dina did have attractive… attributes. And she was standing right in front of him stark naked. It didn’t help matters that Sìleas left him in a constant state of frustration.
Against his will, his cock sprang to life. That did not mean he intended to use it.
“I want ye to give me that back, get your clothes on, and leave the kitchen, so I can finish my bath and get dressed.”
“Come and take it.” As she intended, his eyes went to the pouch, which was lying between her naked breasts.
He looked around for the towel. Damn, he’d left it on the stool on the other side of the table. Dina must have followed his gaze, for she ran around the table, breasts bobbing, and snatched up it up.
Ach! He wanted to strangle the woman.
“If ye will not get dressed and leave, then I will.” He clenched the sides of the tub, hoisted himself up, and stepped out of the tub, streaming water. He was reaching for his clean shirt on the table when he heard a commotion behind him and turned.
Sìleas’s scream filled the small room as he saw her in the doorway. Her eyes were impossibly wide, and she was screaming as if someone had stabbed her.
“Sìleas,” Ian started for her, but then her gaze dropped to his groin and she screamed again. He’d forgotten he was naked. He grabbed his shirt from the table and covered himself. Although she was a virgin, he hadn’t expected her to get this upset by her first good look at him naked.
“It’s all right, Sìl,” he said, walking toward her.
She backed away, not with fright in her eyes, as he expected, but with such hurt that his heart felt pinched in his chest.
When her gaze moved from him to fix on something behind him, he remembered Dina. In his concern for Sìleas, he had forgotten all about that damned woman. And then he realized what this must look like to Sìleas—and why she screamed.
“Ye gave her my stone,” Sìleas said in a choked whisper.
Ian felt as if the walls of the room were crashing in on him, smothering him under their weight.
“No. No, I didn’t,” he said, as Sìleas turned and ran. “This is no what ye think!”
When he started after her, Niall took her place in the kitchen doorway, roaring, “Ye bastard!”
“Get out of my way,” Ian said, and shoved his brother aside.
Unfortunately, bo
th his feet and the floor were wet. When Niall tackled him, he slipped and fell backward to the floor. Then his brother proceeded to pound his head and torso, all the while shouting, “How could ye do it! How could ye!”
Ian was sorely tempted to beat the living shite out of his baby brother when Alex finally pulled Niall off him.
“What took ye so long?” Ian said, as he pulled his shirt over his head.
“Maybe I thought ye deserved it,” Alex said.
“I didn’t touch Dina.” Ian turned around and shouted at her. “Tell them I didn’t touch ye. Tell them!”
While his head was turned, Niall broke free from Alex’s hold and landed a blow to the side of Ian’s head that made his ears ring. He couldn’t see to block the next punch.
He woke up on the floor by the hearth, with his mother hovering over him and his head pounding like the devil.
“Where’s Sìl?” he said, starting to get up.
His mother put her hand on his chest. “Don’t move, or I’ll hit ye in the head myself.”
“Mam, I need to see Sìl. She thinks I did something I didn’t do.”
“Give her time to calm down,” his mother said. “Even then, you’ll have a hard time convincing her. I’ll tell ye, son, it didn’t look good.”
He supposed it didn’t—not with he and Dina both naked, and his cock at full mast.
“Maybe ye should let me talk to her,” his mother said.
“So ye believe me, mam?” He needed someone to believe him.
“You’re like your da,” she said, brushing his hair off his forehead. “Once ye find the woman ye want, ye quit looking.” She turned as Alex came through the front door with a gush of cold air. “My sisters were no so lucky. I hope Connor and Alex don’t follow their fathers’ shameful examples.”
“What’s that you’re saying?” Alex said, as he crossed the room. Then he leaned over Ian, grinning. “So, are ye finally awake? Next time we go ’a fighting, I want your brother with us.”
“How long have I been lying here?” Ian bit back the nausea and sat up, despite his mother’s protests.
Alex shrugged. “An hour?”