by SJ McCoy
Somehow she'd made it through the day, through her official duties. All that remained was the first dance. She could do this. She could hold it together for a few more hours. She watched as Jack led Emma onto the floor for their first dance as man and wife. She was so happy for her friend, that she'd found her happiness. She blinked back the tears, hey, she was allowed to cry at her best friend's wedding. They were happy tears for Emma, or so she tried to convince herself. She felt Pete behind her the moment before he slid his arms around her waist. When Emma and Jack's song ended, the wedding party would join them on the dance floor.
“You ready for this, Sweetheart?” He spoke next to her ear, his warm breath fanning her neck. She'd never be ready for this. She nodded. He took her hand and led her out. Missy and Dan, and Laura and Ben joined them. Four beautiful couples moving around the floor.
Pete held her close. She didn't dare meet his eyes, just rested her head against his shoulder, wishing she could melt into him. The song ended and she let go of him, still not brave enough to look up at him. All the bridesmaids and groomsmen were to trade partners at this point, opening the dancing for everyone. His hand lingered for a moment on the small of her back as she turned toward Dan. When she felt the warmth of his fingertips finally slip away, she felt as though all the warmth and light from her world went with them.
Dan stepped in as the song began. He led her beautifully. She looked up at him, surprised.
“You'll be okay, Holly.” He was smiling at her reassuringly. She bit her lip, unable to reply. “What you and Pete have doesn't come along too often. And you know, with us guys, the smarter we are, the longer it can take us to see the obvious.”
Holly gazed up at him. She hadn't expected anything like this from Dan. “Thanks, Sweetie, but we're over.”
Dan smiled as he led her around the floor. “You two are far from over. Just look at that face.” He nodded his chin towards Pete who held Missy stiffly as their paths crossed. He moved beautifully, but his face was set, his eyes fixed on Holly as they glided by.
Missy dug Pete in the ribs. “At least try to smile. You'll frighten everyone off the dance floor looking like that, not entice them onto it.”
Pete dragged his eyes away from Holly and smiled at Missy. “How's that?”
She laughed. “We don't need the megawatt toothpaste commercial variety. Just try to look like you're enjoying yourself. It is Emma and Jack's big day.”
“Sorry.”
“So you should be, you're being a complete idiot, you know.”
He could always rely on Missy. “Thanks, old friend. I thought I was doing a good job today.”
“Well of course you are. You've been the perfect Best Man. No one would know, if they didn't know. But to those of us that do, it's obvious that you are being a great big idiot!”
He frowned down at her. “How so? What do you mean?”
“Don't give me that shit! I mean Holly, and you know it. If you let that woman get away, you're a fool.”
He blew out his cheeks as the song came to an end, ready to get off the dance floor and go and get himself a drink. Missy tightened her grip on him. To say she was so tiny and delicate looking, she had some strength.
“Don't try to walk away from me, Mister, just ‘cause you don't want to hear it. You need to hear it!”
Pete gave in and led her into the next dance. “Don't give me a hard time, Miss. I'm doing well enough at that by myself. Aren't old friends supposed to help you through the tough times?” For a moment he let her see all the pain he was feeling.
Instead of easing up on him though, giving him the support he'd hoped for, she frowned at him. “I am trying to help you, stupid. It's only a tough time ‘cause you're making it one.”
“Dammit, Miss! It's not in the plan. I like her too much.”
“You and your goddamned plan. Get over it, Pete.”
“I can't, Miss!” Dammit, he didn't need this! He let go of her and stalked off the now crowded dance floor. He needed that drink.
Holly picked her way through the guests. Everyone seemed to be having a great time. If she kept moving, she could get away with a quick smile and hello here and there and not have to stop to talk to anyone for too long.
A beautiful, older woman sitting alone at one of the long tables smiled and beckoned to her. Holly made her way over and sat down beside her.
“You've done a wonderful job, dear.”
Holly liked the woman immediately, she was incredibly elegant, yet laid back at the same. “Thank you, I've had a lot of practice,” she smiled back.
“Your time will come, and in the not too distant future, I'm thinking.”
Holly shook her head. “Not for me. I have officially given up. You know what they say about always the bridesmaid? Well, after this weekend, I have to face the fact that I will never be the bride. Wouldn't even want to be.”
The lady's face fell, “Oh, don't say that dear, that would make me very sad. I'm looking forward to getting to know you.” She covered Holly's hand with her own. “Say you'll have lunch with us tomorrow?”
What a sweet lady! It seemed everyone up here was so friendly. “I'm sorry. I have to leave in the morning.” She liked this woman, wished she'd be spending more time in Summer Lake and could get to know her.
“Then you must come back to see us soon. My husband will adore you.”
Holly smiled sadly. “It's been lovely to meet you, but I don't think I'll be back here anytime soon.”
The woman looked stunned. “But...”
“Mom?”
Holly looked over her shoulder to see Pete standing with an older man. If she wanted to know what Pete would look like in forty years, she need only to look to his left. His father was still a handsome man. Slowly her brain clicked. The woman she was talking to was the person he was calling Mom?
“Pete, dear. I was just getting to know Holly. You must bring her out to see us. We're going to be great friends.” She patted Holly's hand.
Panic was starting to unfurl in Holly's chest as Pete looked between her and his mom. “I.. I have to..” She scrambled to her feet and backed away. “It was lovely to meet you, Mrs., err…Sorry.” She turned and fled.
Pete stared at his Mom. “Have you upset her, dear? She said she's leaving in the morning, but I thought you were coming for lunch?”
Pete could hear roaring in his ears. He wanted to go after Holly. She'd looked so hurt and confused. But he couldn't, his Mom had taken hold of his hand. “I think you'd better sit down and tell me about it, Peter.”
Oh, shit! Not what he needed to be doing right now.
“Peter, are you making a mess of things with that lovely girl?”
He sat down heavily in the chair next to his mom. Why had she said she was leaving in the morning? He'd arranged for Smoke to take them on the last trip back to LA in the evening.
“What's going on, Son?” His dad was looking at him now, too. For God’s sake, much as he loved them, he did not need a parental inquisition at this point. He looked at them both. “We dated for a while. We're done. Nothing more to it, okay?”
He couldn't believe it when his dad burst out laughing. “No way is that done, Son. There's a lot more to it, even if you won't admit it yet.” He turned to his wife. “Leave it, Anne. The boy's not seeing straight.”
His mother patted his hand with an indulgent smile. “Off you go then, dear. Lunch at one tomorrow, if we don't catch you later.”
Pete stood without a word. He scanned the guests, but couldn't see Holly anywhere. Screw it. He headed to the bar they'd set up down by the water's edge. Now he really needed that drink. He knocked back a whiskey then took a long swig of cold beer. What the hell had his mom been playing at? He guessed that Holly had no idea who she was until he'd appeared. He couldn't shift the hurt in her eyes. He took another drink of his beer as he swept his eyes over the party, searching for her. She wasn't on the dance floor. Where was she?
“Been a great day, hey Pete?” He t
urned to see Albert. The old guy had driven up from the city and brought some of the women from Phoenix who didn't want to fly.
Pete called for another whiskey and one for Albert. “Yeah, a great day.” It really had. He was happy for Jack and Emma. It was their day, after all, and he really was thrilled for them. He just wished he could focus on that and not on the heaviness in his chest or the hurt in Holly's eyes.
“If you had any sense, you'd be planning your own big day.”
Pete's head snapped round to look at Albert. “What are you talking about?”
Albert didn't flinch, “I told you first time I met her kid, she's a keeper.”
Pete let out a deep sigh. “Yeah, but I can't keep her.”
“Course you can. The girl is in love with you. For a smart ass, you can be pretty dumb sometimes.”
Pete's heart was racing in his chest. Love? That's what Jack had said too.
Albert was going through his wallet, “Been meaning to give you a copy of these.” He pulled out a photo. It was Holly. It must have been last weekend, she was wearing the slinky little black dress, standing outside his front door. She was unaware of the camera and had that faraway look in her eyes. “I don't know what you did to upset her, but she's riding home with me, Lexi, and the girls in the morning. I thought this might be a good time to give you these so you can ponder on however it is you've screwed up.” He pulled out another photo. It was the same as the first, except in this one she was laughing, eyes shining, happy. Pete stared at it.
“Want to know what happened to make the difference between the first one and this?” asked Albert.
Pete waited, knowing he was going to find out, no matter what he said.
“Just the mention of your name. Don't be a fool, Pete. You're crazy if you let that one go.” He emptied his glass and patted Pete's shoulder as he walked away.
Pete didn't know what to think. He stared at the two photos. The first one tugged at his heart. That faraway look, the one that made him feel so sad. Albert said she was in love with him? She couldn't be. She was cutting him out of her life. She was the one who wouldn't keep seeing him. He shook his head, only because there was no chance of a future in it. But he'd made it clear from the beginning he couldn't offer her that. He couldn't even think about what it might mean if she did love him. His heart was still pounding in his chest. Did he love her? Was that why all this was so goddamned difficult? Oh, who knew! Stick to the plan, that's what he had to do. He caught sight of Ben and raised his hand. Now there was a man who wouldn't give him any grief. He strode over to his old friend.
“What's happening, big guy?”
“Just trying to escape the oldies and their meddling. You know what they get like at weddings.”
Ben laughed. “Sure do, they've been trying to palm that little red haired chick off on me. Nice girl, but not my type. At least you've got Holly to keep 'em off your back. I'm guessing it won't be long until you go over to the dark side and get married yourself. Can't blame you for Holly though. She's quite something. When's she starting on the plaza?”
Not Ben too! “Listen, Bud, can we not go there? There is no me and Holly. She's not going to do the plaza. Can we talk about something else?”
Ben rolled his eyes. “I didn't think there'd be any drama with you two. It was bad enough seeing the ride Jack had with Em.”
“There is no drama. It's just how it is. We saw each other for a while. Now it's over. It happens, what's the big deal?”
Ben smirked. “Sure, Pete. Whatever you say.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
Ben laughed. “It means you've got some catching up to do. Get with the program.”
Pete was about ready to explode. “There is no program. What I have is a plan. Remember? A plan that doesn't include a woman yet. Not even Holly.”
Ben just laughed again. “Work yourself up all you like, but even I can see that the two of you are in love with each other. You apparently still have some shit to deal with and can't see it yet. But you will. I just don't want to go through all that drama again before we reach the inevitable conclusion. I mean, I could understand it with Em. She was scared out of her wits, and hey, she's female. But you? I didn't expect you to be so clueless. Analyze the situation logically, like you would any other. You'll see I'm right.”
Pete said nothing. Was he really missing something obvious, something that everyone else could see? And if so, why?
“Anyway,” said Ben, checking his watch, “You still have Best Man duties to take care of. It's almost nine and Jack wanted to be out of here on time.”
“Yeah, thanks Bud.” Pete left his friend and walked down to the edge of the stage where he waited for the band to finish their song. He shook hands with the lead singer, Chase, as he took the microphone from him.
“Ladies and gentlemen, we need to interrupt proceedings to send our bride and groom on their way.”
Everyone gathered around Emma and Jack for one last toast. Pete watched as all the women crowded around Emma. He finally spotted Holly as she rounded up all the single ladies, ready for Emma to toss the bouquet. The look on her face slayed him, she looked so sad. She neatly dodged out of the crowd of giggling women before the bouquet flew through the air. Then she was hugging Em and Jack wishing them well. Damn, he'd better get down there himself, say goodbye before they headed off. He worked his way through the crowd.
Emma hugged him. “We'll see you in a couple of weeks.”
“Yeah, have a great time, Mouse.”
Jack slapped his back. “Thanks, Pete. For everything.”
“No problem, partner. You take it easy.”
Jack pulled him into a man hug. “Don't worry about me. You get your head straightened out. Fuck the plan! And call me if you hit any snags, okay?”
“I'm not going to call you, asshole. You're going on your honeymoon. Get out of here.”
Emma gave him another quick hug. “Then I'll have him call you. And watch who you're calling an asshole. That's my husband!” She laughed
As Pete stepped back, more well-wishers crowded around to see them off. Jack caught his eye above the sea of people. “Fuck the plan,” he mouthed, then winked as he ducked into the car.
Pete smiled to himself, he could always trust his partner to tell him what he thought. He looked around, searching for Holly again. He needed to talk to her, to hold her. He was starting to think that maybe he was missing something. Everyone was telling him he couldn't let her walk away, his heart certainly seemed to agree. He needed to find her.
He spotted the bridesmaids dress, the rich purple color, and his heart leapt, but no, as she appeared from behind the other guests it was Laura, not Holly. He surveyed the crowds. There! Down by the water. No. Right dress, wrong girl again. He'd bet Miss knew where she was though. He made his way down to the dock where Missy was talking with Dan.
“Hey guys. Have you seen Holly?”
Missy looked at him. “Have you come to your senses?”
He glowered at her, tired of everyone giving him a hard time. He wasn't used to feeling so clueless. “Do you know where she is?”
“No, but she asked me to give you this.” She held out a little envelope.
Pete took it and tore it open to read the note inside.
Pete
I don't want to say goodbye to you, so I'm not going to.
I hope your plan works out well for you.
I wish you happiness always.
Love
Holly
x
He heard the roaring in his ears again, felt the pounding in his chest as looked around wildly. “Where is she?”
Missy put a hand on his arm “She's gone, Pete.”
**********
Holly settled in the back of the taxi and let out a deep sigh. This was going to be a long ride and it was going to cost her a fortune, but it was a small price to pay. She couldn't say goodbye to Pete. His mom had been such a sweet lady, but when Holly had realized
who she was, it had just been one hurt too many. His mom had wanted to get to know each other. Holly would have loved to, but it was all over. She couldn't stick around for even more insight into a life that would never be hers. She didn't belong with Pete, with his parents in their beautiful home, or even at Summer Lake at all. Once she finally faced that fact, she had to get out. She couldn't torture herself by lingering, hoping for one more touch, one more kiss, one more moment with him.
She'd asked Albert earlier if she could ride back to LA with him. After seeing Pete's parents though, she couldn't stick around even until morning. She'd called the cab company that operated out of the resort and surprised them with a last minute booking for a one way ride all the way back to LA. Tonight.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket. A text from Pete.
Where are you? We need to talk.
As she read it, the tears came. There was no point in talking. It was over. Time to face it. She texted Missy.
Pls let him know I'm Ok.
She didn't want him to worry, but she wasn't going to answer him. She thought for a moment, then texted Albert too.
I left already. Thanks for the offer though.
There. That was everything she needed to take care of.
“You okay, lady?” The driver looked at her in the rear view mirror.
“I will be. Thank you.” She'd have to be.
Chapter Nineteen
Pete shook Smoke's hand before he exited the plane. “Thanks, man. It's been a crazy weekend for you.”
“No worries,” Smoke smiled back to where Laura was still sitting in the cabin. “I enjoy it.”
“Yeah, well. You should have a quiet couple of weeks now.” He hadn't missed the exchange with Laura. “I won't need Papa Charlie for the next few days at least. You don't need to bring it back tonight, stay up there and catch your breath for a day or two if you want.” Smoke had been flying wedding guests in and out of Summer Lake all weekend. He'd taken two trips back to LA and one to San Francisco already today. Pete and Nate were the stragglers getting back to LA, and Laura still had to get back to San Francisco. Pete had no problem if Smoke wanted to stay up there.