Falling for the Bad Girl (Cutting Loose)

by Nina Croft

  He wanted to defend Trixie but couldn’t get a word in.

  “And she cries herself to sleep every night,” Summer added. “Her eyes are all red and puffy in the morning.”

  “And she’s not eating.”

  “And she won’t go out. She didn’t even go to her family dinner last week, and then wouldn’t talk to her brothers when they came around to ask her why.”

  “And it’s a good thing they don’t know you broke her heart, otherwise they’d be visiting instead of us.”

  He reckoned there was a threat in there somewhere. If he didn’t do what they wanted, they’d tell her family. But he still had no notion what they expected him to do. Nothing had changed. He was still a cop. Her family was still a bunch of criminals. She still didn’t want him enough to take the risk.

  And at the heart of all this, Regan was hurting, and he hated the thought of that. More than his own pain. Hated that it was his fault, and he had no clue how to fix it. He blew out his breath. At least they had run out of things to say and were now both watching him.

  “What do I do?” he asked.

  Summer got to her feet and gave him a weak smile. “You need to fix this.”

  Darcy followed her up and stared him in the eye. “I don’t know how you do that. But then you’re the goddamn detective, not me. You detect and come up with an answer. There is one. You just have to find it. Fight for her.”

  They didn’t wait for him to show them out, just left him sitting at the table. He didn’t move as he heard the front door slam. But the sound cracked the protective shield he’d wrapped around himself since his father’s death, or maybe even before that. When his father had been diagnosed, Nate had somehow had to learn to cope, to live with the knowledge.

  Fight for her?

  Was he too scared? Or had the whole experience with his father convinced him of the inevitability of losing the people he loved? That losing Regan was unavoidable, and sooner rather than later would be less painful?

  Did he believe that?

  Only as the kitchen went dark around him did he move. He headed upstairs and stripped off his clothes. His wallet lay on the table beside the bed and he flipped it open, stared at his new badge, forcing his brain along the paths it was reluctant to go.

  All I ever wanted.

  But that didn’t mean he couldn’t change, that there wasn’t another way. That he couldn’t have a different life and be happy. Hell, this one hadn’t brought him much happiness so far. Regan was the one good thing to come out of it. With that thought, the last of the numbness dispersed from his mind, and he saw clearly for the first time in as long as he could remember.

  He loved her. He wanted her more than anything else in his life. She made him feel like he could fly.

  By morning he had come up with a solution. It was so simple, he wondered why he hadn’t thought of it long ago. Yet at the same time, it was so hard that he knew the answer had needed to take him this long, and this much pain, to finally come to.

  He jumped out of bed and pulled on his clothes. It was Friday, and he had things to do. First, though, he called Darcy at the gym.

  “Make sure she goes to her parents’ tonight. I’m going to fix this.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Regan sat at the table, letting the conversation roll over her. She couldn’t be bothered to eat, but she occasionally passed the odd treat under the table to where Trixie awaited eagerly.

  She didn’t even know why she was here. She hadn’t planned to come, couldn’t face trying to look cheerful in front of her family. And while she loved them dearly, she couldn’t help but think her life would be easier if they were just…different.

  She would get over it in time.

  But right now, she was consumed by this feeling that everything was over and nothing worth the effort. Any day now, she’d put her big-girl panties on and get stuck into setting up her business.

  Except that made her think about Nate. It wouldn’t be possible without the license he’d gotten for her. And that made her chest ache.

  She was only here because Darcy and Summer had insisted. They’d left it to the last minute, then entered her bedroom like a couple of whirlwinds, insisting she go out, pushing clothes into her limp arms, dragging her into the bathroom. She’d argued halfheartedly, but they’d been so insistent that in the end, it was easier to come. Darcy had even driven here and waited at the roadside until she had gone inside, as though she might make a break for freedom at the last minute.

  She’d brought Trixie with her, because while the little dog would have been happy to stay with Summer and Darcy, Regan suffered withdrawal symptoms when she was separated.

  Pathetic or what?

  Soon she would change. Really she would. She just needed to wallow in misery a little while longer.

  “So, how’s that nice detective?” her mother asked.

  Was she being sarcastic? “His father died.”

  “Oh, that’s sad. You should have asked him over. He could probably do with a good meal.”

  “No, you shouldn’t,” Tom muttered from across the table.

  She ignored the comment. “We’re not seeing each other anymore.”

  “Good.” That was Tom. She ignored him again and handed Trixie a slice of beef under the table.

  “Stop feeding that…dog at the table,” her dad said.

  “Don’t be mean to Trixie.” She gave her another slice of beef. Maybe her dad would throw them both out. Then she could go home and wallow in peace.

  At that moment, the doorbell rang.

  “I’ll go,” her mom said, and disappeared out the door. A second later, Trixie followed her, running out into the hallway and yapping her tiny head off.

  Regan went still. Only one thing, or rather one person, made Trixie sound that happy.

  But that was wishful thinking. There was no way Nate would come here again.

  He’d hardly been welcomed last time.

  Then the door opened and there he was. And she just stared, because he was so beautiful, and looking at him eased the ache in her chest. In faded jeans and a T-shirt, he’d hardly dressed to impress. She let her eyes wander over his body, leaving his face until last. Something was different. Shadows still marked the skin under his eyes, but the frown lines were gone, and his blue eyes were clear and untroubled by the restless energy that had always been part of him.

  His lips curled in a smile, and ignoring the rest of the room, he crossed over to her, leaned down, and kissed her on the mouth.

  “I missed you,” he said, straightening. He carried a huge bunch of mixed wildflowers, and he handed them to her. “I was going to get roses, but these reminded me of you.”

  The delicate scent teased her nostrils. “Thank you…I think.” She shook her head. “What are you doing here, Nate?”

  He took a deep breath. “I came to ask your father for your hand in marriage.”

  Had she heard him right?

  Everyone around the table had gone silent at his entry. Now a cacophony of voices filled the air. She couldn’t catch much, though she thought she heard her father say, “Over my dead body.”

  “Hell, no.” That was Tom, but strangely his words lacked conviction. He sounded more amused than anything.

  She ignored them all. She just sat staring at Nate until the din wound down, her heart beating fast and hard, excitement unfurling in her belly. He wanted to marry her. “Isn’t that a little old-fashioned?”

  “I had to find a way to convince you that we’re meant to be together.”

  “But Nate—”

  “Just hear me out.”

  Tom had gotten to his feet. He was about to be an idiot and she glared at him. “Don’t say anything.” He opened his mouth. “Nothing at all.” She turned her attention back to Nate. She knew logically that there were still the same things in their way. Most of them sitting around this table. All the same, she found herself nodding. “Go on.”

  “I love you. You’re the best p
erson I know, and if you accept me, I know you’ll always be the best part of me. Marry me. I can make you happy. Just give us a chance.”

  He loved her. She’d sensed it for so long and believed it wasn’t enough. But maybe it could be if they loved each other. Surely love beat everything. Oh God, she wanted to say yes. So much it hurt. She glanced around at her family. They all looked a little shocked. Her mother sniffed.

  Her dad put his knife and fork down. “I won’t have my daughter consorting with the enemy.”

  She got to her feet and glared. “It’s none of your business, Dad.”

  Nate cast her a smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners. Then he winked and turned to her dad. “Actually, that’s not a problem, sir.” He glanced back to Regan. “I resigned today.”

  Shock had her collapsing back onto her chair. “You resigned? From the police?”

  He nodded. “Your friend Darcy told me I had to find an answer. And it was so easy, really.”

  “But it’s all you ever wanted to be.”

  “Maybe, but that’s in the past. People can change. You taught me that. If they want something enough. There are other things I can do. And I want you more. I’m not saying that I’ll ever approve of your family or what they do.”

  “Who asked you to?” Tom growled, but he didn’t sound particularly put out.

  Nate ignored the interruption. “But this way, it will never come down to a choice between us. You can have us all, Regan. Just say the word.”

  She looked around at her family.

  “Well, you’ve been a total waste of space without him,” Tom said, and she nearly fainted in shock.

  Her father studied her for a minute. “If he’s willing to give up his career for you, then I suppose we’ll give him the benefit of the doubt. But I hope he’s not expecting you to keep him, now that he’s out of work.”

  “Don’t worry. I have a plan, sir.” He turned back to her. “Well, will you marry me, Regan Malloy?”

  Her eyes pricked, and she sniffed. “I will.”

  He held out his hand. Regan put down her flowers and placed her palm in his. He tugged her up and then led her out of the room, kicking the door shut behind him. Lowering his head, he kissed her deeply, until the room swam and her lungs screamed for oxygen. Finally, he raised his head. “Thank Christ. I thought it might not be enough.”

  He’d given up his life for her. “I promise I’ll try to be worthy of you.”

  “You’re already a much better person than me.” He nodded toward the closed door. “You grew up with that lot and still managed to turn out right.” He kissed her again, briefly this time. “You’re a good person. The best.”

  “What will you do?”

  “You think I won’t be able to provide for my woman?”

  “I don’t care. I’ll look after both of us.”

  “Actually, I thought we might go into business together.”

  A smile tugged at her lips. “Really?”

  “Yes, really. But we’ll talk about that another time. Right now, I have something for you.”

  “You do?”

  “Oh, yes.” He pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket and flicked it open, then held it out to her. “I hope you like it. You might say it has a meaning for both of us.”

  She stared down at the ring. Her first thought was it was the most beautiful ring she had ever seen. A large single stone, in a simple white-gold setting that allowed the beauty of the jewel to speak for itself. Her second thought was… “Oh my God, it’s a diamond.” She stared at the familiar stone for long seconds. “You didn’t?” He raised an eyebrow. “Oh my God, you did.” She caught her lower lip with her teeth, and then a giggle escaped her. “You’ve given me a ring made from stolen property.”

  “Maybe I needed to prove that I’ve really changed.” He shrugged. “I handed the rest in this morning at the same time I handed in my resignation. I told them they’d been sent to me anonymously. Now you’ll always have this over me. You can send me down anytime you like.”

  “I can’t believe you did that.”

  “And I went to see your brother, asked him if he knew anyone who could make a ring fast with no questions asked.”

  “Tom helped you?” That’s why he’d been so relaxed, even amused, about the whole thing. He’d already known what Nate planned.

  “He needed a little persuading at first, but when he realized he was no longer dealing with a detective, he was quite helpful.” He took the ring from the box and slid it on her finger. A perfect fit. “We can get the setting redone if you don’t like it. It was a rush job.”

  She blinked down at the beautiful ring on her finger. “No, I love it.” She wrapped her arms around his middle, rested her head on his chest, and listened to the thud of his heart. She’d never let him go. “And I love you.”

  Epilogue

  Three months later

  They’d been married that morning, followed by a luncheon attended by their friends and Regan’s family, and of course, Trixie.

  He had to admit that a roomful of Malloys and police officers did not make a comfortable mix, but both sides had managed to rein in their natural inclinations, and no actual fighting had broken out.

  Now a white-gold wedding ring sat beside the brilliant diamond on his wife’s finger.

  He had no regrets. He’d never been happier. In fact, he hadn’t actually believed he could be this happy, and Regan seemed the same.

  They hadn’t spoken of it, but he hoped one day she’d want to start a family with him. A new generation. And they could be whatever they wanted. Well, maybe with a few provisions; he didn’t want his children following in Grandfather Malloy’s footsteps. But that was in the future. First, they had a business to set up and a new life to figure out.

  They were on their way to the airport and two weeks of swimming in the Caribbean Sea and dancing under the stars. But on the way, he wanted to make a drive-by and another quick stop-off. The drive-by was Holloway prison, and he slowed the car as they passed.

  “That morning, I saw you, and somewhere inside, I knew I was done. Finished. I wanted to wrap my arms around you and never let you go. My life as I knew it was over. I was just too stupid to realize it and do what had to be done.”

  “And I thought you were a detective stalker.”

  “Forever, sweetheart. You’ll never shake me.”

  They left the prison behind, and he headed to the gym and Regan’s new offices. Of course, they’d discussed their plans, but he wanted her to see the evidence before they flew off. Darcy had done it for him this morning, after Regan had left.

  He’d already sold his father’s house and was investing the money in Regan’s security business. They were going to add a detective service. He was now a PI, and he could make up his own goddamn rules. He couldn’t wait to get started. They were going to live away from the premises, though, moving back into his apartment for now. Until children came along and they’d need a bigger house.

  He parked in the alley and took her hand as they climbed the stairs to the offices. Halting outside the door, he turned to her. “You like?”

  The new sign read:

  Carter and Carter

  Private Investigators

  “I love it, and I love you.”

  “And I love you, Mrs. Carter.”

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  Acknowledgments

  First of all, I’d like to thank all the bad girls I met in prison who were an inspiration… Only kidding, I’ve never been in prison, though I did spend a night in the police cells once…but that’s another story.

  I would like to thank everyone at Entangled Publishing, who are a dream to work with, especially Liz and Candy, who I had the great pleasure of meeting for the first time this year, and my new editor, Brenda, whom I’m sure must be feeling a little overwhelmed at this point—tha
nk you for taking me on and for the fabulous edits!

  I’d also like to thank the lovely ladies at Passionate Critters, who keep me on the straight and narrow, motivate me, and tell me exactly what they think, and where I go wrong.

  And finally, of course, my husband, Rob—without him, none of this would be possible—my hero!

  About the Author

  Nina Croft grew up in the north of England. After training as an accountant, she spent four years working as a volunteer in Zambia, which left her with a love of the sun and a dislike of nine-to-five work. She then spent a number of years mixing travel (whenever possible) with work (whenever necessary) but has now settled down to a life of writing and picking almonds on a remote farm in the mountains of southern Spain.

  Nina writes all types of romance, often mixed with elements of the paranormal and science fiction.

  If you’d like to learn about new releases, sign up for Nina’s newsletter here.

  www.ninacroft.com

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