by A. J. Downey
“Just so. You can do as you will, go where you will, tonight. The Temple will hopefully give you some peace and pleasant memories. Or, if the past is too difficult, maybe some inspiration for a way forward. I’ll meet you at the exercise yard tomorrow. Unless you’ve changed your tendencies and want to join people for breakfast.”
“I’ll meet you by the yard, same spot as usual.”
He chuckled at that. “It’s been a lot of years, for me, at least. Nice to see at least one thing being as constant as ever. But, then, an Angel’s perspective, I suppose. All right, the usual spot, then.”
“As you like. But why not back here?”
“Because you’re not going to come be social, and you should at least see Adelaide. It will reassure her, amidst all this unfamiliarity.”
“I’m fairly certain you’ve done more to reassure her than I have.”
“We just provided a few human comforts. One of those things about humans, even up here. With a hard life, plenty of work, and the lifestyle we’ve chosen, a few creature comforts are appreciated. Warm baths and a bed among them. You’re still the one she’s going to need to trust. She knows we can’t protect her forever, and she doesn’t want us to.”
“Getting close to Adelaide is not part of the plan.”
“Then, my friend, the plan may need to change. Iaoel is not going anywhere as long as Adelaide is alive. If you’re truly just after her Grace, then your best bet is to kill Adelaide now and hide it away again.”
“Not an option,” I said.
“That’s just it: it is an option. And you have to consider all of the options, because you haven’t left yourself very many. You can reject it after giving it some thought, certainly, but it would answer a lot of the problems, and set things back the way they were.”
“And that’s an option you’d seriously have me consider? After you welcomed her, and offered her sanctuary?”
Yin shook his head. “I didn’t offer her sanctuary. I offered you sanctuary, out of respect for old times, and I allowed you to bring her along. I’m not going to take any action for you. She’s safe from anyone else on these grounds, but you’d be free to do as you liked, as if anyone here could stop you.”
His answer surprised me, until I remembered the full nature of just where I was. All of the peace and serenity needed to have a balance somewhere. And sometimes that balance would be cold pragmatism. He reacted as if the surprise showed on my face, but whatever the reaction, it didn’t last long. “I did consider it, Yin. Back when I thought of whether I’d ever need to kill Piorre. He knew and accepted the risks. With Adelaide, I reject it. The principle is worth it. I’ll find another way.”
“I’m certain you’ll try. I’m trying to be certain you’ll succeed, but certainty is hard to come by. Especially if all of the other Angels are as determined as you are.”
“But you’re still offering me sanctuary anyway.”
“I’ve lived a long time. And I’m not ready to stop, just yet. I have a lot to answer for in that long life, and I’m not sure if reward or punishment is waiting for me… and I’d kind of like to keep it that way a bit longer. Better the devil you know, so to speak. Like I said, certainty is hard to come by. You’d seem to offer the best chance to delay the end of things.”
“I’d prefer that the devil I know stay out of this for as long as possible.”
Yin laughed hard, then took a few moments in catching his breath. “Your sense of humor hasn’t changed, either, my friend.”
“I was being humorous?” It was only halfway a joke, after all. I managed to keep a straight face.
He shook his head. “Try to get some rest. We’ll talk more tomorrow.”
“We will. And you’re certain Adelaide is safe?” Best to make sure. Others might share his brand of pragmatism, or at least consider it.
“Completely. You’ll be able to see for yourself, tomorrow. Plenty of folks, especially those most aware of the risk she presents, may not like it, but you have your time. And in the meanwhile, she’ll continue to have access to food, the baths, and a good bed. Since it seems she’ll be leaving with you, it may be the last time she has any of those comforts for a while.”
I nodded, fully grasping the earlier comments now. They could comfort her, for a while, but I was the only one she could really rely upon. “Good night, Yin.”
After he had left, I wandered the grounds for a time, and then found my way outside, climbing up the building to its highest point. I stretched my wings, letting the clear, cold air refresh me. Meditation may not have helped, but the change of scenery worked wonders. For a time, I did little other than look to the stars, contemplating the scope of the galaxy, and the galaxies beyond, and letting myself forget the troubles of this one world.
I came out of my reverie with the rising of the sun in the distance. The time spent contemplating the greater universe hadn’t given me any insights into resolving the problems of the here and now, but it had put me in a better mindset to consider them. It was a start, at least. I could hear the bustle of people in the monastery below, as they started about their chores for the day. I let them focus on that, remaining atop the building and looking down at the world below. Among the things I scanned was the road we’d traveled. Still no signs of any other visitors. Not that I was expecting anyone to find us here quite this quickly. Best to be cautious, though, just in case.
With that done, I spent a while watching the sunrise. Numerous cultures considered the sun to be tied to one of their greatest gods, whether that being’s body, or a sign of their eye upon the world. While I knew better, it still felt good to see the light come streaming over the mountain tops, and as much as He’s locked himself away, it felt like God’s eye was still upon the world, and upon me. I spread my wings, red and black-edged as they were, and welcomed the light. Opening myself to His judgment. No word came, of course, no sign that my path was the right or wrong one, but I still felt better for the experience. It was only once the sun had fully risen over the peaks that I glided down from the heights and returned to the monastery in search of Yin.
I made my way to the exercise yard, where many of the Temple’s inhabitants were stretching and exercising. I remembered how much Iaoel enjoyed these simple rituals, when we came here together. As much as she paid little mind to the people themselves, at least as individuals, ceremony, tradition, and ritual were things she appreciated. She said that she found the sight came easier when her mind was properly relaxed.
“Good morning, Tabbris.” Yin was only a few seconds behind me. In his younger days, he’d quite enjoyed watching the other residents go through their exercises and rituals, taking pleasure in the community, as much as in any particular activity himself. For all that I knew our previous conversations weighed heavily on him, he sounded pleasant enough. Good sign that we still had time. “Your companion seems to have taken to her guide.” He gestured.
“Good morning,” I responded, without looking away from the girls. “Two days.”
“Two days?”
“Today and tomorrow. I think that’s as much as we can reasonably ask. I know you’ll be meeting with the others soon. You can tell them that we’ll be out of the Temple in two days’ time.”
“You have a plan, then?”
“Not yet, but I’m hoping to very soon. Any help or insight would be appreciated.” There was something odd about Adelaide, but I couldn’t quite place it while I watched her exercising. She never looked up, so it wasn’t anything that came about because of any awareness of our presence.
“You hid her Grace away for a very long time. Continuing to hide seems sensible, to begin with.”
“They know who they’re looking for, now. And I somehow don’t think Adelaide would take well to being kept entirely out of anyone’s sight for long. Whatever we do, it will still have to be with her agreement.”
“That will make hiding far more difficult, yes. All the more reason she’s going to have to come to trust you.”
&nb
sp; “I had hoped saving her life might have that effect.”
Yin smiled. “It will almost certainly help. At least for a while. You’re still going to do yourself a favor if you try to get to know her. Being too distant, for too long, some of that trust will begin to erode again. Especially when dealing with so many unfamiliar beings and situations. I realize it’s a balancing act, you can’t get too close … but be too distant, too long, and Lucifer becomes that much more tempting. I know he’s the least of your short-term worries, but his endgame is also the most damaging. If one of the others wins, they may learn of a narrow window to try to climb through. If he wins, he can bide his time.”
I nodded, and looked at Addy again. Something was still bothering me. “I’ll try to keep that in mind. Perhaps this afternoon, I’ll talk to her. Give her a chance to ask some of her questions.”
“I’d say that would be an excellent use of your time here, yes. We’ll still need to meet, and work out your next steps, though.”
“So you do want to be involved in the planning, after all?”
“As ever, you raise a lot of questions whenever you show up. I had to ponder some of them. Ultimately, while knowing anything makes me, and this place, a target, not doing my very best to aid you in any way I can – excuse me, in any way in which you’ll allow – ” He glanced meaningfully at Adelaide, in the yard below. “ – increases the chance you’ll fail, and something far worse will succeed. I wish I had your conviction, my friend. But you’ll have to settle for friendship plus a touch of enlightened self-interest.”
“It will do,” I replied, with a hint of a smile.
It quickly faded at his next words. Glancing down into the courtyard towards Adelaide, he said, “Well, that brings back memories.”
It finally hit me, what was bothering me. As much as he meant it to be pleasant, or at least a pleasant memory to him of a previous visit, the realization was anything but. The two of us here, talking, looking down into the yard was only part of it. Addy, in her exercises, had taken on not only the same position, but the same posture, same general character, and same serene expression as Iaoel always had in her exercises down in that same yard. The girl was moving towards Adelaide as we spoke. It seemed that perhaps Iaoel, during such relaxed moments, was able to assert herself a little, even mostly still folded into Adelaide’s being, beyond just the occasional flash of post-cognition.
The girl tapped Addy on the shoulder, bringing her out of her reverie, and pointed towards us. Master Yin, of course, was still smiling, and waved back when Addy waved to us. Not sure what to make of the realization yet, or what it foretold for our future, I’m sure I wasn’t nearly so warm. It was not precisely a good start to opening up or helping her to trust me, but at the moment, that concern came secondary to worries about how else, or when, Iaoel might influence her host.
Yin was still smiling. “She seems like a pleasant girl,” he said. “Beautiful, too.”
“So was Iaoel,” I said blankly as I turned around. “We should return to the planning room. I’ll find Adelaide and speak with her more later on.”
“As you wish, of course.” I seemed to have made my concerns clear, as his expression sobered. We walked in silence, aside from Yin’s offering greetings to two of the other high-ranking members of the Temple, whom he assured all was going according to plan. I was uncertain just how much they agreed with the plan, as both took pains to avoid eye contact with me. Perhaps it was just that they had been well-schooled in such matters when dealing with any supernatural creature. I hoped they wouldn’t soon have to deal with more.
“You don’t like being reminded of Iaoel,” Yin began upon our return to the planning room.
“Given my last interactions with Iaoel and the consequences, no. What’s more, after resisting Piorre’s efforts for so long, she seems very comfortable with Adelaide. I’m very certain that there’s more to do before her Grace would awaken fully. What we saw was still tied to a peaceful condition far more familiar to the Grace than to Adelaide, but the visions, at least, are likely to start coming more frequently.”
“And that’s bad? It might give her some insight.”
“Or it might show her very limited perspectives on past events. Iaoel’s memories and insights are likely to be tricky things for her to navigate.”
“But if she can, it might give you an advantage that no one knows you have. If she can control the visions, or help direct them, at least.”
I pondered that for a little while, then spoke my thoughts aloud, watching his reactions. “That’s a dangerous path. I’m more and more concerned that Iaoel could ‘wake up’ and overtake Adelaide completely as the Grace unfolds. On the other hand, the personal journey of unfolding the visions could make Adelaide an ally with some ability to protect herself. Just as importantly, it’s a blind spot for Michael. He’ll keep watch on the places and people he thinks I might go to, without a thought for looking into her background.”
“A blind spot for Michael. Certainly not for Lucifer. Her motivations will be foremost on his mind. Most of your friends and allies have at least fully made up their minds where he’s concerned.” He’d brought up the idea, of course, but I quickly caught on that he was not so much objecting to the idea now, as helping me make sure I was looking at all the risks and rewards involved. Truly an apt time to play devil’s advocate.
“Then I will definitely need to talk to Adelaide soon, if we’re to follow her path instead of mine.”
“Hoping she knows what that path is?”
“She doesn’t, almost certainly. And it’s not the right time for that discussion yet, anyway. I need to get a better feel for her understanding of her situation, and see if she’s recovered enough yet to start taking on some of the emotional blows that dealing with all her past regrets will bring up. If she’s still not accepting what’s happened so far, she’s definitely not ready yet to resist temptation.”
“And?” Apparently he could sense that there was something more I was hesitating to say aloud.
“And I need to determine how much Iaoel’s visions are showing her, and how much she’s missing. If she’s going to start guiding our steps once we leave this place, I need to make sure it’s Adelaide’s will doing the guiding.”
“And?” he smiled.
“And Michael attempted to influence her with half-truths. I’m sure he sees it as the full truth. I didn’t debate philosophy at the time.”
“Ahh, I see. And you’re worried that it’s not just Lucifer’s words that might sway her.”
“As I understand it, through most of human history, people have been told to be cautious of deals with devils. I can’t recall ever hearing any similar caution regarding Archangels.”
“So you are at least occasionally paying attention to us, and our morality tales?”
That drew another small smile. “Repeat something often enough, and I might hear about it sooner or later.”
“Then when you get the chance, you may want to do some catching up. You’re going to have to be able to pass as human now and then, with what you’re doing now.”
“Any suggestions?”
“Read some newspapers, visit a library, find a motel to hide out in for a couple days and watch television.”
I quirked a brow, glancing around at the monastery walls. “What do you know about television?”
Another easy smile. “Something is around long enough, I might hear about it sooner or later. Regardless, I’ll bet I know more about it than you do.”
“You’d win that bet. I haven’t had a lot of leisure time.”
“And even when you have, you haven’t allowed yourself the chance to rest. I suppose, of course, you don’t really need to. But getting to know a few more humans, or at least what is important to them, might help you appreciate the benefits of free will a little more; since you are so focused on defending it.”
“Not needed. I appreciate free will as God’s gift to mankind. That’s plenty.”
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��Different kinds of appreciation, I suppose. But as I understand it, not all of your brethren are so, how to put it, dedicated? You might allow yourself a little chance to relax.”
“I don’t think that’s going to happen any time soon. As for my brethren, if you’re referring to Gabriel, yes, he’s very laid back. He also thinks plagues can make great punch lines.”
Yin’s expression sobered. “Maybe I do like you better the way you are,” he sighed. “Back to business, then. What are your first steps?”
“I talk to her, and determine if this plan is even possible. If it is, we’ll need to start soon, before how much is Adelaide and how much is Iaoel’s influence becomes more confused.”
“So you’re going to tell her the plan, and see what she thinks?”
“Not yet. I’m going to let her ask her questions. See how much she’s figured out, and how much she just knows now. I’m going to try to get some sense of her confidence in me, and herself. If I feel comfortable with the results, I tell her there’s a plan in the works, but we need to discuss it more. Then, you and I need to meet one more time tomorrow to work out some details.”
Chapter Five
Adelaide
I looked over my shoulder, glancing back at them as Tab and Master Yin watched us go. The girl’s hand was gentle and silently urging in my own, and I swallowed. Everything was turned upside down and inside out in my head. Earlier today, I couldn’t wait to get rid of Tab, and now I felt apprehensive about letting him out of my sight after just having arrived on a strange Temple’s doorstep. Master Yin’s words echoed in the back of my mind.
“You will have to forgive Tabbris. He’s been through a lot for humanity. He seldom sees any gratitude or warm feelings from us, and I think that makes him a little grumpy.”