Love Discovered in New York (The Washington Triplets)

by Danielle Allen

  Taking a step toward me, he narrowed his eyes. “I guess around the same time you did.”

  He was close enough for me to touch him and I caught his scent in the gentle summer breeze. I inhaled deeply, savoring it with a sentiment that I didn’t even know I was capable of.

  Squaring my shoulders, I stared up at him. “You sound like a jealous ex-boyfriend.”

  “You just called your co-worker a bitch. Sounds like you’re the jealous one,” he challenged. His eyes burned into me as we stood inches apart, glaring at each other.

  Colton being so close to me turned the knot in the pit of my stomach into a ball of nerves. Goosebumps spread all over my skin and my heart was beating wildly. Noticing the effect he had on me, my eyes pricked with tears.

  I hate that he does this to me, I complained silently. The emotions he brought out of me just fed into my anger. I should’ve never gone out with him. It was supposed to be a one-night stand. It wasn’t supposed to be all of this.

  “Why would I be jealous? We were a one-night stand gone wrong. We should’ve never happened,” I hissed venomously. My heart tightened as soon as the words left my mouth. My body’s reaction let me know that I didn’t mean the words that I just spewed at him.

  Something flashed in Colton’s eyes and a look crossed his face that I couldn’t quite place. His chest moved up and down quickly as he breathed noisily. “We should’ve never happened, Mya? Is that how you feel?”

  I knew I wasn’t strong enough to verbalize that lie again so I just nodded.

  Colton’s jaw clenched as his eyes flitted over my face. Then he shook his head slowly. Dropping his voice to a painfully soft whisper he said, “I’m not your dad, Mya. The sooner you realize that, the better off you’ll be.”

  I didn’t respond. I didn’t move. I didn’t breathe.

  Colton reached his hand up and gently touched my face with the back of his hand. Wrapping his hand around the back of my neck he pulled me into his chest, dropping a kiss on my forehead. “Goodbye, Mya,” he whispered before he walked off, bypassing the front door of Duke & Duchess and heading up the street.

  THE NEXT TEN DAYS OF my life sucked in the most gut-wrenching way. I was usually able to get over things, especially men, quickly and easily. But for some reason, I couldn’t shake Colton. I thought about him incessantly, so I worked nonstop to keep my mind busy. I didn’t want to be home alone with my thoughts, so with it being the end of summer and everyone wanting to take a night off for some reason, I was able to pick up extra shifts. I was able to put extra money in my pocket and distract myself from my own thoughts.

  I was content with my plan of distraction until Nicks put his foot down and forbade me from coming into work. Fortunately and unfortunately, Kelsey had the night off too and agreed to spend the night at my place. Fortunately, because I didn’t want to be alone; unfortunately, because all she wanted to do was psychoanalyze me.

  “It’s okay to be sad, Mya,” Kelsey said softly as she lay beside me in bed. “But don’t you think that your sadness means something?”

  “It means leave me alone,” I groaned, rolling onto my side, putting my back toward her.

  “No, you need to hear this.” The bed moved and I knew that she sat up and made herself more comfortable for the lecture she was about to give me. She pushed my shoulder down, forcing me on my back again. I looked at her and pursed my lips, but we both knew I was going to listen to what she had to say.

  “You mourned your mother’s death for maybe a month and then your dad announced his engagement and you shut down. I know when you’re hurting. I know when you’re sad. But you’d rather be angry than anything else. You are so quick to be someone else’s hero, but you won’t be your own. Fight for yourself, Mya. Fight for what you want. Fight for what you need. Fight for you.”

  Before I could interject, she held her finger up and wagged it at me. “I’m talking about things you’re emotionally invested in. I’m talking about things that could potentially hurt you. You want to call your dad out about cheating on your mom, do it. You want to admit your feelings for Colton, do it.”

  “I don’t—” I started.

  “Don’t try to bullshit me. I’m your best friend. I let you live in your world of denial for weeks, but it’s time to get real. Five weeks ago, you met him and felt something. You two hung out every day for a week and a half. I barely saw you without him attached to your hip because you two were so wrapped up in one another. If you weren’t seeing him before and after work, you’d spend entire days with him when you were off from work. Every single time I saw you, you were grinning from ear to ear. And then you pick a fight with him and you two don’t talk for two weeks. And then when you two finally see each other, you are unable to speak to him…until you run into each other outside and get into a huge fight because you don’t want to admit to having feelings for him. So now here we are, ten days later. Miserable.”

  I shrugged and looked away from her. “I know the story, must we recap?”

  “You ended things with him because you felt something, Mya. You do understand that don’t you?”

  “I told you, he said that he was done and he walked away,” I protested lamely.

  “Yeah, after you told him that you two were a mistake and then you walked out on him. And now look at you.” Her tone was soft, yet firm as she grabbed my hand and implored me with her eyes. “Do you feel better? Now that you’ve tried to sabotage your relationship with him, do you feel better?”

  I still feel like shit, I thought as the pit in my stomach swelled. I didn’t verbalize my answer to the question. There was no need. We both knew the truth.

  “Colton was right about one thing. You have to talk to your dad. The ‘men ain’t shit’ cynicism is fine when you’re dealing with random hookups. But don’t let your dad’s mistakes mess up a good thing for you.” Kelsey handed me my cell phone. “The first call you need to make is to your dad. I’ll be in the living room.”

  She walked out of the room and shut the door behind her.

  Taking a deep breath, I scrolled down to his name and hit the button. It rang twice and I swore I would hang up on the third ring, but he picked up.

  “Mya?” Dad answered the phone in surprise.

  “Dad,” I greeted him. “Can we talk?”

  “Yes, of course. I didn’t think you were going to call me back. It’s so good to hear from you. I’ve been—”

  “I need to get this out,” I interrupted, my eyes welling with tears. “All my life you told me that I never commit to anything. After I didn’t like ballet or softball or piano, you told me that I had an inability to commit. Who says that to a child? You also told me that I wasn’t living up to my potential because I wasn’t like your other perfect daughters. I’ve always felt like you’ve tried to shame me into living the life you wanted me to live. It was bad enough you made me feel like a disappointment, but for you to call me a disappointment at mom’s funeral…that was harsh.”

  “I’m so sorry, Mya. I—”

  “It was harsh because you were the true disappointment, but you projected that onto me. You didn’t even wait until mom’s body was cold before you jumped into bed with Janet. So you are the disappointment. You obviously didn’t know anything about commitment.” I tilted my head back to keep the tears from falling from my eyes.

  “Mya, listen to me. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I was very emotional at your mother’s funeral and I was unable to get the words out correctly. I was trying to say that your mother and I were disappointed that you weren’t able to make it home for her last Christmas with us. I know that it came out sounding like I was calling you a disappointment and I’m sorry about that. Looking back on that day, there are a lot of things I wish I could’ve said and even more things I wish I could take back. And about Janet…”

  I listened to the shaky breaths my father was taking and I knew he was crying. Oddly enough, that made me feel better about my eyes watering.

  “Your mother and I weren
’t in love with each other anymore. We had been talking about a divorce for some time. We were working out the terms privately so we wouldn’t have to spend so much on lawyer fees. We didn’t want to tell you girls until we were ready to present to a lawyer. It was an uncontested divorce. We both wanted this.”

  I felt like my face was frozen in a state of shock. I blinked back the tears that refused to fall. “What? No, I don’t believe you. It’s easy to make anything up when the only other person who knows this alleged version of the truth is dead.”

  “Your sisters knew something was wrong. They were here so they saw what was happening. Especially in the months leading up to your mother’s passing. Have you talked to them about it?”

  Is that why they are willing to go to the wedding? I wondered.

  “Please come home next weekend, Mya. I’m begging you. Please,” he pleaded as his voice broke. “I need to see you. I need you to know that I love you and I’m proud of you and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I ever made you feel like you weren’t good enough.”

  “I need time to think. I’ll think about it,” I said hoarsely. “I have to go.”

  “I love you, Mya.”

  “You too, Dad.”

  I tossed my phone to the other side of the bed and closed my eyes tightly. Taking a few deep breaths, I collected myself. Grabbing my laptop off of the nightstand, I powered it on, opened my email and clicked on the folder titled ‘MOM.’ I went all the way down to the very first one she sent almost nineteen months ago. And I started reading.

  Mya, I now know why the caged bird sings. It sings because of people like you, my beautiful child. Here’s a poem by Maya Angelou to kick off your week. A Maya for a Mya. I love you. I miss you, I read silently as the tears trickled down my cheeks.

  Was she the caged bird? I wondered as my heart broke. I didn’t get it then. I thought she was just sending me wise words and inspirational quotes because she thought I needed guidance and direction. But maybe she was sending me some insight on her life. And I was too blind to see it.

  I read each email with a new perspective. An email from last summer made me gasp.

  Mya, I don’t even know if you’ve ever been in love or not. But I must warn you, tread carefully. Fall in love with someone who makes you laugh. Life has its ups and downs…and during those downs, you need someone who can lift your spirits. Fall in love with someone who brings passion out of you…because the everyday life is boring without passion. Fall in love with someone who understands how incredibly unique you are. You don’t want to end up tied to someone who doesn’t bring the best out of you. You want a love that stays gold. Robert Frost says that nothing gold can stay. But I think the right kind of love is the only exception to that rule. True love stays gold, I read the email to myself for the second time.

  Was she talking about her relationship with dad? I thought, pushing down the name that kept trying to bubble up to the forefront of my mind. True love stays gold.

  Quickly, I moved on to the next email from my mother in my inbox and then I just kept reading until I got to the last one she ever sent.

  Mya, I know I haven’t been supportive of some of your decisions. But you’re an adult and you’re blazing your own path. Continue to not let anyone (not even your parents *smile*) stop you from being exactly who you want to be. Remember this always: Imitation makes you who they are. Individuality makes you who you are. I love you and I miss you, I recited my mother’s emailed words silently as I wiped the tears away.

  “Imitation makes you who they are. Individuality makes you who you are,” I quoted in a trembling whisper as I closed my laptop and placed it on the nightstand.

  Curling up into a ball, I closed my eyes and cried myself to sleep. I cried for my mother. I cried for my family. I cried for Colton. When I woke up, I was all cried out. My eye sockets hurt and my face felt puffy.

  I don’t even want to know what I look like, I thought as I pushed myself out of the bed.

  “Kelsey!” I called out as I opened my bedroom door. My apartment was empty, but she left a note on the coffee table. “Going to get food. Real food. I don’t know why you insist on not going grocery shopping,” I mumbled aloud.

  Dropping the note back on the table, a small smile was all I could muster because my throat was tender. I headed into the bathroom and proceeded to take a long, hot shower. The water felt good against my skin and the mixture of heat and steam opened up my pores. Once I stepped out of the bathroom, I truly felt like I had gone through a cleansing.

  Picking up my phone, I opened my email app and sent my sisters a short email.

  To: Marisa Washington; Mikaela Washington

  From: Mya Washington

  RE: RE: FWD: RE: Wedding

  I’m sorry I ignored your emails. I’ll explain when I see you on Saturday.

  I love you

  After hitting send, I went to my text messages. Scrolling to Colton’s name, I reread one of our first text conversations. One line stuck out to me like a sore thumb. Even though I was sad, I still smiled at the exchange.

  Colton Davis: I came back to the office to get some paperwork and I found that note you left on my desk. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who makes obscenities sound so sexy.

  Mya Washington: So are you saying you liked my drawing or…?

  Colton Davis: Yeah I liked it…among other things.

  Mya Washington: Hmm sounds interesting. What other things?

  Colton Davis: Specifically, you. I’ve never met anyone like you. You’re one-of-a-kind.

  Mya Washington: Technically, I’m three-of-a-kind. I’m a triplet remember.

  Colton Washington: Ha! This is what I’m saying. Your uniqueness alone is why I’d choose to bunker up with you in a zombie apocalypse.

  Mya Washington: I’d choose to bunker up with you because of the sex.

  Colton Davis: Of course you would.

  He called me unique, I thought, reflecting on my mother’s words. My mind was spinning as I got dressed. We hung out for nine days and then we haven’t spoken for a month. Well except for outside of Duke & Duchess, but that doesn’t count. We didn’t really talk, we argued. Oh God, did I really tell him that we were a mistake? I need to make things right. I can’t talk to my mom, but based off of that one email that said ‘choose your words wisely’ I’m sure she would tell me to apologize to Colton.

  My finger hovered over the call button. The closer my finger got, the harder my heart pounded in my chest. I was nervous. In all of my life, the only times I could remember being nervous had to do with Colton.

  I wasn’t nervous when I got questioned by the cops because of that sit-in I organized on campus, but I’m nervous to apologize to Colton. That doesn’t make sense, I thought ruefully as the phone began to ring.

  On the second ring, a female voice picked up. “Hello?”

  I opened my mouth, but sound didn’t come out.

  “Hello?” she repeated in a sing-song tone of voice. “Colt,” she yelled after a pause, “I picked up your phone—” And then the phone disconnected.

  I hung up, feeling nothing but numbness.

  Seriously? I thought dropping my phone on the bed.

  I wasn’t tired because of my nap and I debated if I should go out or not when Kelsey burst through the front door.

  “Mya, are you awake?” Kelsey asked, making enough noise to wake me if I wasn’t.

  “Yeah,” I answered, feeling completely drained.

  “Come eat!”

  I pulled myself off of the bed and padded into the living room. Over dinner I explained everything to Kelsey who continuously wiped tears from her face as the story progressed.

  Through her sniffles, she asked, “So your dad and your mom were separated, but living together?”

  “That’s what he says. I’m going to ask Marisa and Mikaela because they were at home a lot more than I was. But when I read over the emails she sent me, I think she was over it. I don’t know. Messages that didn’t make sense when I firs
t got them, if I think about her being ready to divorce my dad, make sense now.”

  “So are you at peace with your dad marrying Janet now?”

  I gave her a look. “Hell no! But I need to talk to him face-to-face. I need to talk to my sisters face-to-face. I may not even attend the wedding, but I need to have a conversation with them. After that, I’ll decide.”

  She smiled. “Good. I think it’ll be good for you.” Finishing up the last of the vegetable medley on her plate, she held her finger up while she chewed. “Now, have you thought about calling Colton?”

  The chest pain was back at the mention of his name. I cleared my throat. “Actually, I have. I called and a woman answered the phone, so it’s done.”

  “What? Well, who was it?” Kelsey’s shrieks sounded like mine would have if I would’ve allowed myself to verbalize my feelings.

  “I don’t know,” I whispered. “Can we just watch a couple of romantic comedies and not talk about it?”

  I could see she was holding back several more questions when she responded, “Of course.”

  We stayed up until two o’clock in the morning watching movies. Kelsey fell asleep on the couch and I returned to my room and opened my laptop again. I searched the internet for about an hour before I settled on a not-so-reasonably priced roundtrip ticket to Chicago. I then booked a room at a nice hotel.

  Thank you, Nicks, I thought as I made the payment. The extra cushion in my account helped.

  When I fell asleep, I had a nightmare that the woman who picked up Colton’s phone was Rhiannon. And Rhiannon’s mother was Janet. And Mikaela and Marisa loved their new step-sister. And they all got to know each other at Colton and Rhiannon’s wedding. I woke up early the next morning with a massive headache.

  I knew at that point it was going to be a long week.

  “I KNOW THIS IS LAST minute. But I need to take a few days off to go home. Is that cool?” I asked, standing in front of Nicks’ desk.