Love Led By the Spirit (Restore My Soul Book 3)

by Pat Simmons

  “Hey, I have gotten better.” Jet refused to let the pain and hurt consume her anymore. “I only cried—two times.”

  “Three,” Layla corrected. “I was keeping track. Remember, keep reading your Bible.”

  Bible? Jet thought about the scripture God pointed her to before Layla called.

  “Have you seen Rossi?” Layla asked, interrupting her thoughts.

  Why was she grinning before she answered? “Yep. He actually came to the cemetery.”

  “Huh?” Layla repeated. “I didn’t know you planned to stop there. How did he know? Did you tell him?” She rattled off questions as Jet replayed the scene in her head.

  “I don’t know how he knew. He just showed up.” Her voice drifted as she strained to recall his very words. “Actually, he said he had been watching out for me.”

  “Hmmm.” Layla chuckled.

  “What?”

  “Oh, nothing... So how was Dori?”

  Jet smiled. “Cuter than ever and getting taller, and she’s starting to look more like me.” Proud, she beamed at the assessment.

  “So are you glad to be home?”

  “Time will tell, despite being homeless because my friend kicked me out, and unemployed because my friend fired me…” She couldn’t finish as Layla burst out laughing, and Jet joined her.

  “You know you’re welcome to come any time to visit, but I felt you needed to be there and fight until the end.”

  “You were right. I’m not about to let Levi or Karyn intimidate me.”

  “Good. I’m a phone call away if you need me, but it seems Rossi is even closer. Are you sure he doesn’t like you?”

  “Of course he likes me—as a domineering older brother who thinks he can boss me around.” Her stomach growled. “Listen, all this recap is making me hungry.”

  After they disconnected, Jet reached for the menu and ordered room service. While waiting, she grabbed her Bible, but her mind was still on what Layla said. Rossi liking her as more than a charity case?

  Nah, she doubted it. He had too many options out there to focus on her.

  ***

  Saturday afternoon, Rossi’s mind was elsewhere as he mingled with family and friends at his father’s retirement party. One person was missing, and he wondered what she was doing.

  “Rossi, please tell me that crazy woman’s not back in town,” Nalani Wallace, Karyn’s younger sister, said as she strolled to his side.

  He schooled his expression before glancing at the woman everyone thought was the perfect match for him. Nalani was fiercely loyal to Karyn, a people person, polished, classy, and would call on politicians if she needed favors—like making sure Jet’s bank reversed the decision not to approve the loan for Crowning Glory salon.

  Yes, the petite diva was a force to be reckoned with. And like any full-blooded man, Rossi had been blindsided by her beauty and charm too. Once she surrendered to Christ, he pursued her as a wife candidate. The two had dated heavily for months, causing Rossi to wonder if his attraction was lust building within him or true love. It wasn’t until he was on his knees crying out to God for direction about whether Nalani was the right one for him that the Lord spoke.

  Rossi, your heart knows. God whispered nothing more.

  He’d searched his heart and concluded Nalani was missing something. He just couldn’t put his finger on what it was. If he had to hold out until he was fifty years old, Rossi was determined to find the woman who would love him because of what was in his heart, not his title or bank account.

  He and Nalani’s courtship slowed, and eventually, they decided to be friends or in-laws. Now he looked at her. Where Jet was tall at five-ten and curvy, Nalani was five-four or five easily without the six-inch heels she teetered on at the moment with an appealing shape too.

  Both women were beautiful and classy. Nalani had the features to pull off the short haircut that accented her face. To sum Nalani up in one word: stunning. Jet wore her hair long with curls that bounced with her every move. It was her flawless brown skin that was eye catching. He had seen her with and without makeup. Jesetta Hutchens had a gift from God. She was naturally beautiful. One thing both ladies had in common was their love for their sisters.

  “She’s anything but crazy. She suffered a great loss as you had when Karyn was incarcerated. Only you have Karyn back. Jet has nothing,” Rossi explained gently. “She has every right to be here. Dori is her niece.”

  Not only did he want to be Jet’s protector, but he wanted to defend her too. She was a good woman. “Her story is not yours and yours isn’t hers. Pray for her, Nalani.”

  Hmphed. She folded her arms and jutted her delicate chin. “I’m going to be praying alright that she tiptoe around my sister or…”

  Rossi could feel his nostrils flare. “Or else what, Sister Nalani? Don’t step out of the will of God to enact revenge. Jet’s not saved—yet. Show her the love of Christ.”

  Nalani lifted her eyebrow and looked away, waving at a few family members. “I’ll pray more for me that the woman doesn’t test me.”

  “Noted.” He shook his head, then slipped his hands inside his pockets.

  He saw his cousin in the distance. Levi walked up to him. “I thought Jet might have tried to invite herself. Whew. So glad she didn’t.” He grinned and took a sip from his bottled water.

  “My sentiments exactly,” Nalani added.

  “Cut her some slack, Tolliver. She might surprise you. Jet may turn out to be a better Christian than most believers, including us.” With that final statement, Rossi excused himself so he could speak with his parents.

  “Congratulations again, Pops.” He shook the elder Rossi’s hand. “You’ve been a good role model.” He kissed his mother’s cheek.

  “Thanks, son.” He looked over Rossi’s shoulder. “I heard Jet was back in town. I thought she would be here.”

  “She is. Maybe she felt she wouldn’t be welcomed,” he said to both of them.

  “We’ve all had devils to fight. I can’t imagine the loss that young woman suffered. I hope she got some counseling and with prayer, God can make her whole,” his father said sincerely, genuinely liking Jet.

  “Amen,” his mother said. “She just needs a double dose of love.”

  Rossi wanted to pat his chest and confess that he had that taken care of, but he held his tongue. His family was too vocal about the right woman for a minister. If he had the Lord Jesus’ stamp of approval, that was all that mattered.

  Chapter 6

  Sunday morning, Jet stretched as she snuggled under the comforter. The day before had been a good one as she explored old hangouts across the area. For the first time in months, she looked forward to Sunday service where she’d hear a Word from God that would touch her soul. With Rossi preaching, she hoped God would speak to her. All other sermons paled compared to his.

  So today was family and friends day at Living for Jesus Church. She no longer felt like family, and she doubted anybody missed her at the retirement party. Suddenly, she missed Layla. At least when she visited churches in Nashville, she wasn’t alone.

  Getting up, she tapped the Pandora app on her phone and gathered her items for the bathroom. She had set up her selection for female gospel artists, and those singing sisters were her companions all day Saturday.

  Already she had some favorite songs, and one of them played while she was in the shower: “Free” by Kierra Sheard. She didn’t know if the song was new or old, but the words seemed to seep into her pores. Jet desperately wanted to be free once and for all of the pain of losing Diane. Some days, Diane’s death hit her hard.

  When the singer said to lift her arms, Jet did that just that. Tears streamed down her cheeks. She followed the prompting by the artist to be free from burdens, the mind games, the past, and more. By the time she stepped out of the shower, Pandora had played two or three more songs, but that one stuck with her.

  Jet realized as long as she stayed mad at the world, she could never be free. She made a promise to Dia
ne and herself that she would move on.

  As she dressed, Jet prayed, Lord, I know You speak to Rossi, but speak to me today. I don’t know how many people will be there, but I need a message.

  After applying her makeup, she brushed her long mane up into a ball on her head. She liked the youthful look it gave her. Next, Jet put on a royal-blue sleeveless dress and chiffon duster to cocoon her from the slight chill in the sanctuary, then slipped on her shoes.

  She swiped up her Bible and purse, then headed to the lobby for breakfast. Jet nodded at the patrons.

  Working in the hotel business for nine months gave her an eye to discern if guests were enjoying their experience. She couldn’t help but assess the same thing that morning.

  Jet acknowledged a few appreciative stares from men with a smile, but she didn’t linger. She planned to do things differently when she dated again. She didn’t want or need Rossi’s or any of the Tollivers’ approval. If a man could make her happy, put up with her occasional moods—hormonal or otherwise—and make her laugh, then he would be a keeper. But first things first, she needed to connect with God as Diane had done.

  At the buffet table, Jet filled her plate with fruit, then requested a made-to-order omelet. Half an hour later, her belly was full, and she was behind the wheel of her car. She was about to pull out the garage when she received a text.

  Remember today is a new day. Don’t let yesterday’s stuff ruin it. Call me after church.

  She smiled at Layla’s message before replying.Rossi’s preaching, so I know I’ll hear some good stuff.She tapped Send and drove off.

  The Tollivers’ church was centrally located off I-270. It was a magnificent white stone structure with acres of parking. The thousand-plus membership wasn’t a mega church, but it definitely was too large a crowd to make her feel at home. She would find a church with a more intimate setting where she could grow little by little.

  Jet was relieved that Levi had changed his membership to Karyn’s church. After parking her Lexus, Jet crossed the lot to the entrance that had a bold sign overhead: Enter expectantly, depart triumphantly. She smiled. Jet hadn’t noticed that before the few times she’d visited. She hoped that would be the case today.

  Although she had read the entire chapter four of Genesis as Rossi suggested, she didn’t understand God’s logic behind protecting the first murderer with a mark on his forehead to keep him from succumbing to the same fate. Cain had murdered his flesh and blood as Karyn had done with her son. Whether God had sealed Karyn with a mark or not, whenever Jet saw her, she saw a murderer.

  “Enough,” she mumbled, then smiled at the ushers as she stepped into the lobby. Knowing in which section the Tollivers sat, Jet veered in the opposite direction, then she bumped into Rossi’s mother, Laura.

  “Jesetta!” The woman, who was inches shorter than Jet and fashionably dressed, held onto her hat with one hand as she encircled her arm around her with the other. “I’ve missed you.” Her eyes sparkled. “My son told me you were back in town, and I had thought you would be at the party.”

  Why did she suddenly feel guilty? “To be honest, I didn’t want to be a party crasher.”

  “Nonsense. Party crashers are overrated.” Laura Tolliver tsked then looped her arm through Jet’s and steered her in the direction she didn’t want to go. “We’re sitting over here.” She pointed.

  “I know. I thought I would sneak in and out.” She was hoping Laura would take the hint.

  “Nope.” She proceeded to march down the aisle where the other family members were sitting. They waved and smiled, easing some of the tension. She got sandwiched between Tolliver sisters-in law. That meant there was no escaping Laura and Levi’s mother, Sharon, who she once was very close to, any time before the service ended.

  “Our lost sheep has come home,” Laura whispered to Sharon.

  She hugged Sharon, but Jet was cautious. After all, Karyn was a Tolliver now, so by default, Jet distanced herself from family.

  “I’ve missed you.” Sharon’s eyes watered.

  Jet nodded and blinked as she looked away. She didn’t want to start bawling. Then as if sensing eyes on her, she glanced toward the pulpit and met Rossi’s stare. He gave her a mock salute. She giggled. Some things never changed. From the hugs and Rossi’s gesture, Jet dropped her defenses.

  The praise team finished a string of melodies, the church secretary read the announcements, and then Pastor Bryon Brown walked to the podium. “Praise the Lord, everyone! Our speaker today is no stranger or guest. He and his brothers were baptized here, and he’s worked with our youth tirelessly in kingdom building. Please stand as Brother, Minister, and Preacher Tolliver gives us what the Lord has given him.”

  Rossi stood and Jet noted his swagger to the podium under thunderous applause. Jet and the two pews of Tollivers screamed the loudest.

  The only time she’d seen him bashful was when others gave him accolades as a minister. “Thank you.” He motioned for everyone to be seated. Jet grabbed her Bible, anxious for God to speak to her.

  “Before I give you my text…” Standing tall and confident, Rossi commanded the audience with his deep voice, “I want us all to consider our guilt today. Have you ever been angry at God for something someone else did, but you blamed God for their behavior? If you are blaming God for the bad stuff, who gets credit for your blessings?” He paused for them to consider his question. “There is one God, and His name is above every name—Jesus, and our guilt doesn’t separate us from Him.”

  Jet considered herself a smart, educated woman, yet Rossi had dumbfounded her.

  “If someone sinned or committed a crime, we want the maximum punishment as justice.”

  “Amens” circulated around Jet, so she added her own.

  Rossi smirked and nodded. “What if it were you? Wouldn’t you want the grace of God to get off the hook? The blood that Jesus shed keeps you from getting caught and tried in the devil’s court. Repentance keeps God from punishing you for every wrongdoing conceived in your mind, then committed with your body.”

  She gnawed on her lips, scanning the crazy things she had done and said in her lifetime that could have gotten her in trouble, but like he said, Jet hadn’t got caught. She thought about when she slapped Karyn after hearing her admit she had killed someone. The woman could have pressed charges for assault—and she would have deserved it—but Karyn didn’t. Had that been God’s grace?

  “Now—” Rossi patted the podium—“you may open your Bible to Genesis four.”

  So he had given her a preview of his sermon by telling her to read Genesis chapter four. She smiled, thinking she was privy to something others had no advance knowledge of.

  “In verse seven, God tells Cain how to stay in God’s graces, simply by giving Him the best sacrifice. We all know that didn’t happen because he became angry with God for rejecting his sacrifice. He took his anger out and killed his baby brother. Wow.” Rossi stepped back, folded his arms, then shook his head.

  He was quiet for a moment, then said, “Lord, help us not to get so angry that we sin. When you get a chance, study Ephesians 4:26.”

  She made note of that scripture in her phone to read later. Up until this point, she didn’t realize how bad the fallout could get from her anger, especially at Karyn. Jet had to admit bodily harm wasn’t out of the question when she saw the woman.

  “This is a mind-boggling chapter because God didn’t give Cain the punishment we think he deserved. Despite his disobedience, God protected him from the same fate with a seal or mark of protection…” His manner of preaching was so convincing and compelling, people didn’t stir. Soon, he closed his Bible. “Nothing good can come out of being angry with God—or others. This is the altar call. Please stand. If you came angry today, leave it here. Repent before you do something crazy. Cry out to the Lord Jesus, and He’ll answer. Come today and let God put His seal of the Holy Ghost on you. Come…”

  Jet took a deep breath, then exhaled. How many times had she heard Rossi�
��s plea, only to ignore it? Her heart pounded as she contemplated her next move. She rested her Bible on the seat next to her, and Laura touched her hand but didn’t say a word. Swallowing back the uncertainty of what she was committing to, Jet stood and climbed over the Tollivers as they clapped and shouted, “Thank you, Jesus.”

  Stepping into the aisle, she bowed her head. This wasn’t a catwalk to the altar. She didn’t care who was watching or if she was the sole one. Anger would no longer rule her life. Instead of being directed to one of the ministers, Rossi came down the steps and waved her toward him.

  “What do you want from the Lord today, sister?” he asked as if he didn’t know her.

  “I want God’s forgiveness and His seal,” she mumbled through her tears as Rossi’s strong hands gently squeezed hers.

  “If you repent, He will forgive you instantly, then complete His salvation plan for you with the water baptism to be buried with Him, and Jesus will give you the Holy Ghost, so you can be resurrected when He returns.” He paused. “This is between you and God, Jesetta. Talk to Him,” he softly urged her. “Not me.”

  Hearing her name on his lips calmed her spirit. “Lord, please forgive me,” she whispered until two women, dressed in all white, came to her side and led her out of the sanctuary into a small room. She wasn’t the only one changing her church clothes for white pants and gowns, mumbling to God. Soon, Jet joined other candidates at the pool’s ledge. Surprisingly, Rossi was in the water, standing between two other ministers. She couldn’t recall a time when she heard him preach, then watched him baptize folks in the same service. Her mind was jumbled with too many thoughts to reason why.

  When she was the next to step down, instead of going to the last minister as she had seen others do, she was directed to stop in front of Rossi. When their eyes met, she relaxed at his smile.

  “Cross your arms over your chest, Jesetta.” She did as he instructed. “Once you repented, God planted the seed for your salvation walk to grow. This anointed water will not only wash away your eternal sins, but sins that were waiting in the wings. Finally, God promises you the Holy Ghost, and it will increase your faith in Jesus.”