Escape to Morning

by Susan May Warren

  As if he had wanted to sink into her arms. Just like she wanted to dive into his.

  “Will makes me feel Safe. ” Her own words to Micah had startled her. How long had it been since she’d felt safe, all the way to her soul?

  Probably never. At least not that she could remember.

  Will had listened to her secrets without rushing past them, bearing them as his own. He’d carried her dog to safety, sat with her while she acted like a worried mother. He’d laughed with her, listened to her, held her hand, and been her friend. He’d even revealed his own dark places. Despite his rather iffy exterior—first as a pseudo policeman, then as a sly reporter, and now as a special-ops commando—she felt as if she knew him, at least the man under the masks.

  A man of honor. God’s man, maybe.

  Her heart thumped against her ribs as she climbed over the boulders toward him. He looked up at her with red, cracked eyes, as if startled. As if he hadn’t slept in about three weeks. Whiskers dotted his face, blending with his goatee.

  The wind had learned Dani’s weaknesses and wafted his scent toward her. He must have taken a swim because he smelled devastatingly fresh and woodsy. So utterly Will. At least the Rambo Will. The cowboy, dinner-date Will had smelled of cologne and shaving cream. She liked them both.

  “Good morning.” He gave her a small, one-sided smile. “You’re up early.”

  She rubbed her hands on her jacket arms as she came closer and stood in front of him. “I heard something. It was probably a bird. I’m a weird sleeper—when I wake up, that’s it.”

  He nodded, turned back to the sunrise. “Me too. I have too much whirring around in my brain to sleep a full night. I can’t shut off that long.” He gave a self-depreciating laugh. “Whoops, I guess that might have been too much information.”

  She ran a finger through the paint still remaining behind his jaw. “You didn’t get all your makeup off.” She showed him her green finger.

  To her surprise, he reached up, caught her hand. His smile had vanished, and his eyes were on hers. “I’m sorry, Dani,” he said softly.

  She frowned at him, not sure if he was serious or what he might be apologizing for. “That’s okay. It’s not a big deal. It’ll come off—”

  “No, I mean for … well, for everything. For nearly hitting your dog when we first met, for scaring you twice in the woods, and even for—” he closed his eyes, let go of her hand—“for being a reporter.”

  She laughed and put a hand on his shoulder. His muscles twitched beneath her touch. “Oh, that. Well, I’ve already forgiven you.”

  He didn’t smile, didn’t even look at her. Something felt wrong. She touched his cheek, turned him to face her. From where he was perched, he could look her straight in the eyes. Instead, he looked away … down … anywhere but at her.

  “Will, is there something you’re not telling me?”

  He sighed. “There’s so much I wish I could tell you, Dani.” He met her gaze. The pain roaming in his eyes made her heart lurch. He brushed the backs of his fingers across her cheek. “You’re so beautiful.” When he said it, however, it sounded more like a groan.

  She took his hand, threaded her fingers through his. Then she surprised them both by kissing the back of his hand.

  His eyes widened. He opened his mouth slightly, blew out a breath, his gaze still holding hers.

  A loon called, a haunting melody across the silent lake.

  She saw desire pool in Will’s eyes right before he closed them and pulled his hand away. Like the loon, a haunting cry lingered, something so deep it reached out and tugged at her.

  Could it be that he was just as afraid as she was? that he needed safety too? Her fingers traced his neck, touching the hair at the nape. Her heart thumped hard, as if just catching up to her intentions, but she ignored the warnings.

  Will opened his eyes as she leaned close and touched her lips—gently, sweetly—to his.

  He went very, very still.

  She closed her eyes, kissed him again.

  Then his hands went around her waist, and he pulled her to himself. His lips moved, and he slowly kissed her back. Tenderly, as if he were afraid she might break, or worse, run away.

  He tasted like fresh toothpaste, with a hint of coffee, and inside his embrace, she felt his heart beating against hers. She wound her arms around his neck, deepened her kiss, letting herself fall into the moment. Will, her Boy Scout reporter, in her arms … the notion couldn’t find footing, so she released her clutch on reality and slid into the dream.

  Will, the man who’d been her friend when life seemed to shatter. Will, the one who believed in her hunches. Will, the one who listened to her nightmares and cared. Will, strong Will, holding her as the sunrise crept toward them, as she escaped the nightmares that embedded the night and clung to this moment, this new morning.

  Will released her suddenly, taking one deep breath, then another. He kept his eyes averted as he held her upper arms and put her slightly away from him.

  Panic spurted into all the warm places in her heart. “Will?”

  “I’m sorry.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry, Dani. I shouldn’t have—”

  “I kissed you.”

  He stared at her, searched her face, and then, while her heartbeat thundered, the barest smile broke through his whiskers. “Yeah, you did, didn’t you?”

  Yeah. She grinned, waggled her eyebrows. “You looked like you needed a little help to … get something started.”

  He reached up, and with something like boyish wonder in his eyes, he touched her hair. “It is soft.”

  She gave him a teasing frown. “Are you okay?”

  He sighed, nodded. Then, with his hands cupping her face, he pulled her close and kissed her again. Devastatingly sweet. Lingering. When he let her go, he seemed to shine. “Are we starting something?” The words had the power to hurt her if it weren’t for the hope palpable in his voice.

  She ran her hands down his powerful arms—way too powerful for the average reporter—and smiled. “I don’t know. But … well, I was thinking about our conversation about Iowa yesterday. You said you’d learn to drive a tractor?”

  “I’ll learn to drive anything you want, Dani.” But he exhaled as if the idea had him around the throat. He shook his head. “Only you don’t want to start anything with a guy like me. I’m just—”

  “A nosy reporter? I got that part.”

  But he didn’t laugh. “Are you sure? I mean, well … I don’t know if I’ll be any good at—”

  She took a step away, feeling sick. Any dummy could see that she’d been stupid. How had she thought that he’d want her in his life? She’d already treated him like the town dog, over and over. No wonder he felt skittish. She wanted to call back to that loon her own cry of defeat. Or maybe just slink back up to the cabin—

  He grabbed her hand. “Dani, please don’t get me wrong here.” His face wore panic. “I do want to start something with you. I can’t get you out of my mind—your smile, the way you are with your dogs, even your determination to find this girl. You’re amazing, and it takes my breath away most of the time. I’m still reeling that God brought you into my life, and more than anything, I want to be that guy who makes you feel safe, who protects you.” His expression twisted, and he wore a pained look. “I’m just afraid that … I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

  He didn’t want her to get hurt? Please, please don’t let that be a line. “You’ve already proven to be a true friend. And you have kept me safe.” She chuckled at her words. “More safe than I think is necessary at the moment, but it’s very nice. I think God’s used you in my life for today, and … I’m willing to take my chances on tomorrow.” Had she really said that? It felt very much like scooping her heart out and handing it to him, but the slow, honeyed smile that curved on his face felt like a sweet reward.

  “Yeah, me too,” he whispered.

  Kirby bounded up, a piece of driftwood in his mouth. He sat, dropped it.


  Dani was reaching for the wood when she heard a screech like the one that had wakened her. It ricocheted through the woods and sounded like an owl or even a mountain lion.

  Kirby perked his ears, the ruff around his shoulders standing on end.

  Dani froze, glanced at Will.

  He was looking past her, toward the cabin or beyond, a dangerous look on his face. “Stay here,” he said as he slid off the boulder.

  She frowned, made to argue.

  Will gave her a dark look, held up a finger. “For once, Dani, let me be the boss, okay?”

  Then he stalked away from her. Rambo, off to save the world.

  Will stole up the beach, aware of Dani’s gaze burning the nape of his neck. But that scream had sounded human. And young. Because the morning was still and the air light, the sounds may have traveled across the water … or maybe they had come from somewhere nearby.

  His heart shoved into his ribs, and he picked up his pace, ran into the forest. For a second he wished he’d taken Kirby, just like he’d planned earlier. But for the same reason he hadn’t left with the dog at first light, he knew he couldn’t take him now.

  He simply couldn’t do that to Dani. Especially after she said she’d take her chances on him. Oh, wow, he couldn’t believe the feelings that had exploded in his chest when she said that—joy and fear and more than a little panic.

  It made him thankful that he’d lingered on the shore after his patrol, watching the dawn crest over the water.

  He stopped and listened above his racing heartbeat. He heard far-off footsteps crushing the forest floor.

  He moved quickly toward them, berating himself for not spending the last eight hours combing the forest. If he’d done his job better, rather than tossing away the night chewing on Micah’s words and fighting the memories of Dani’s smile, maybe his mission wouldn’t be hanging by a fingernail hold.

  The forest was still bathed in the swath of night, deep shadows eclipsing the ground. It made for loud passage for someone in a hurry. Will stepped carefully, picturing the two goons he’d met before the storm muscling a struggling teenager out of the woods, perhaps even subduing her with their fists.

  Or otherwise.

  No, please, Lord. I know I’ve been distracted here, but I need Your help. Help me trust You, like Lew did.

  Lew would have enjoyed Dani. Enjoyed her honesty, her courage. Warmth churned in his chest. She’d kissed him. Not because she was after something tawdry, but because she was after something … better?

  “You don’t even think about kissing a girl until you love her.” Will nearly stopped short as Lew’s words burned in his brain. He climbed over a downed tree, fighting the claw of memory that grabbed him:

  “What are you doin’, man?” Lew had been waiting for him, holding the reins of his two workhorses as Will drove up to the Strong ranch that Monday morning, fresh from a hot weekend with Bonnie’s cousin.

  Will had smiled, feeling at the top of his game. What had he been doing? Wouldn’t Lew like to know? “What do you think?” He gave Lew a cocky grin as he got out of the car.

  Lew didn’t smile. He tossed Will the reins to one of the horses. “Are you ready to marry this girl? Because you don’t even think about kissing a girl until you love her. And you don’t say you love her until you’re ready to marry her.”

  Will laughed. “You’re letting the preaching go to your head, Lew. Loosen up. Life is short. Sorry, but marriage is so not in the cards for me. Hello, I see my parents and thanks, but no thanks.”

  Lew shook his head. “Don’t you get it?”

  Will frowned, and his defenses burned. “Yeah, I get it. Pretty well. And so did Bonnie’s cousin.”

  Lew made a noise of disgust and turned away. “There are times I don’t know why we’re friends.”

  Will froze, just stood there while Lew climbed on his horse. He felt as if the guy had taken a dagger to his gut. Lew was more than a friend. Without Lew and his family, Will might be sitting in juvie hall right now or six feet under in the local Eternal Rest Cemetery. Will swallowed a lump of fear and mounted the horse. “Sorry, Lew. I didn’t know my personal life was so important to you.”

  Lew turned, fury in his eyes. “I guess if you want to screw up your life, I can’t stop you, even if I try.”

  Will stared at him, feeling punched. “Screw up my life?”

  Lew rode out into a nearby field, then reined his horse. “Listen, here’re the cold facts. You can fool around with love, indulging in the desserts without getting the nourishment. But like any sweet, too much will burn you out. You’ll lose the taste for it. And then you’ll have nothing but a fat gut and a wasted life.”

  “I doubt that.” Only, despite his weekend with Katie, if he were to pull out his feelings and take a good look, he might admit he felt sorta empty, even sickened.

  “But if you do it right,” Lew continued, “you’ll have the full-course meal. The nourishment and the desserts. And in balance you’ll never go hungry.”

  “And what you and Bonnie have is nourishment?” Will laughed harshly and spurred his horse into a run.

  Even now, Lew’s silence dug into Will’s soul. Yes, Lew and Bonnie had created a friendship that had nourished Lew while he served his tours, that gave him reason to return. It had probably even made their desserts better.

  “You don’t even think about kissing a girl until you love her. And you don’t say you love her until you’re ready to marry her.”

  Whoa. Will swallowed a rise of remorse as he ran through the forest. He wasn’t ready to go there. Except, well, the thought of waking up every day to Dani’s smile … he pictured her playing with their children, tenderly, patiently, the way she was with Missy and Kirby. He saw her listening to him with her eyes, praying for him in that calm voice that seemed to soothe all his ragged edges.

  He heard her calling him Rambo or Cowboy, and it arrowed directly to the soft places of his heart and dug deep. Dani wasn’t glitz and shimmer; she wasn’t false agendas and a quick fix. She was substance. Nourishment.

  The real deal. That feeling exploded again within him as he stopped, braced his arm against a tree, and climbed out of his emotions to assess his direction.

  Only reality had him by the throat.

  He was falling for Dani. Hard, fast, and with no escape. For the first time in his life, he wanted to be a man who wouldn’t kiss a woman until he loved her. Until he was ready to marry her.

  He closed his eyes, trying to shake himself out of her grip, and heard the sound of branches snapping.

  Will whirled and his heart sank when Kirby ran up, tail wagging, as if to say, “isn’t this fun?”

  He knelt. “Shh. Go back.”

  But dread had already fisted his heart. Through the woods, he could already make her out, like blue neon. Dani, her hood pushed back, charging toward her dog.

  Just like she’d charged into his heart.

  Chapter 18

  “DANI, P LEASE GO back.” Will watched her with a wide-eyed— even horrified—expression as she approached. It made all those happy feelings she’d had on the beach take a dive for her toes. What was his problem? Weren’t they in this together?

  Once again she realized that no, they weren’t. Her chest tightened just like in the cabin yesterday when he’d dodged her question about his hiding something from her. Why had she ignored it? Something felt painfully not right here.

  She sat on a downed log next to Kirby and ran her hand over his back, not looking at Will. “Look, if there’s someone out here and you heard her, then let me help you. Kirby knows what he’s doing. He found you, didn’t he?”

  Will shook his head. “Hardly. He followed me.” He knelt before her. “Please trust me. Go back with Kirby. I’ll find the girl.”

  She searched his face, saw worry in his expression. “What is it, Will?”

  He touched her jaw. “Go back to Micah and Conner. Let them take you home. I’ll be there soon.” He looked away when he said it, and even s
he could see his smile was forced.

  “I can’t abandon some girl out in the woods,” she said quietly. “Not unless you tell me—” Words left her as she saw a man emerge from a clasp of trees. Dressed in head-to-toe terror black, he looked like something out of the news.

  In fact, he sorta matched Will.

  She grabbed Kirby’s collar, feeling cold seep into her bones when the man aimed an assault weapon at Will.

  Will read her face and turned. Tensed.

  “Put your weapon down,” the man said in a slightly accented voice.

  What is going on here?

  She stared at Will, horror radiating through her veins, her muscles. Who was Will Masterson? And why did everything he said about being sorry on the beach suddenly make painful, clarifying sense?

  She stood up, held Kirby, her gaze locked on Will as he dropped his weapon.

  “Let the lady go,” Will said. “She has nothing to do with this.” His tone felt distant, removed.

  She tried not to let that dig into her soul.

  The man’s eyebrows lowered in disapproval. “Move.” He motioned with his gun.

  Will made to obey, but he glanced back at Dani, dark eyes intense. “Run,” he whispered.

  Run? How? She felt frozen. Kirby, however, lurched away from her and lunged toward the assailant.

  It happened in warp-time speed.

  The man cuffed Kirby.

  Will pushed Dani hard as he dived for his gun. She hit the forest floor before she could blink.

  A shot frayed the leaves above her.

  Dani screamed.

  Another shot.

  Wood sprayed Dani.

  “Get down, Dani!” Will yelled, returning fire.

  She was down, for pete’s sake. Only maybe she should be inching away too.

  Except where was Kirby?

  A barrage of shots, wood chips, branches, and leaves rained down on her. Dani screamed again, and the echo filled the forest.

  “Go! Run!” Will’s voice caught somewhere in her brain.

  Run?