Jake Drake, Know-It-All

by Andrew Clements

  1 plastic bubble wand

  2 root beer bottle caps

  1 big nail

  4 ribbons I won at YMCA camp

  3 small nails, all rusty

  1 old toothbrush

  1 calculator

  1 little roll of white string

  1 plastic harmonica

  1 short measuring tape

  1 jingle bell off of my Christmas stocking

  1 sand timer from a game

  1 cork

  1 wire key ring

  1 pair of pliers

  And then I stopped. There was still more stuff, but I was tired of writing. Plus I didn’t want to use another piece of paper. Plus I felt like I was just wasting time.

  I was almost ready to go and ask my dad for help. That would be dangerous, because of that K-I-A/D-I-A thing. That might be bad, but it would be better than never finding an idea at all.

  But as I stared at all that stuff, I remembered something.

  I remembered how I’d read in this kids’ magazine about magnets. About how you can wrap wire around something made of iron. Then if you run electricity through the wire, it makes a magnet.

  I pushed a bunch of things out of the way until I found the big nail. It was about four inches long. Then I found the roll of thin wire. Starting at the head of the nail, I began winding wire around and around, onto the nail. There wasn’t that much wire. Still, I put about thirty turns on the nail before it ran out.

  Then I grabbed the toenail clippers. I peeled some of the plastic cover off one end of the wire. Then I found the other end of the wire. I peeled some plastic off that end, too.

  Now I needed power. I reached into the drawer and pulled out a big fat flashlight battery. I pressed one end of the wire on the top, and the other end on the bottom of the battery. Then I put the end of the nail near a small paper clip. And… nothing. Zero. Zilch.

  I threw the nail and the wire and the battery into the drawer and started to shut it.

  Then I thought, Hey, you idiot! It’s probably a dead battery—try again!

  I poked around in the drawer until I found one of those small boxy batteries, like the kind from a walkie-talkie. I hooked one end of the wire to each little button on the battery. I moved the nail next to a paper clip, and zzip! It jumped right onto the nail! And so did three other paper clips, and so did a bottle cap, and so did the fingernail file!

  So then I looked at this wire and battery and nail. And I looked at the stuff dangling from the nail. And I said to myself, Okay, but does this help with my science fair? This is just stupid stuff from my junk drawer.

  I looked at the science fair booklet again, at the question part, where it said:

  What is the effect of ________________ on_________________ ?

  So I asked. I asked myself,

  “What is the effect of more batteries on the power of the magnet ?”

  And then I asked myself,

  “What is the effect of more wire on the power of the magnet ?”

  And then I thought,

  “What makes more difference, more wire or more batteries?”

  And the great part was, I really wanted to know the answer!

  You know how sometimes you can just see something in your head? Just see it like it was all right there? That’s how it was.

  I could see this big poster telling all about my idea. And another one telling how I tested my idea, and what results I got.

  I could see these big supermagnets I made. They were all hooked up to batteries, humming like the lights at school. And my magnets were lifting up these heavy chunks of metal.

  I could see myself at the science fair. I could see the judges listening to me explain everything. They were smiling.

  I could see Kevin and Marsha. They were not smiling.

  And I could see me sitting in my room. I was playing ZEE-SQUADRON STRIKE FORCE on my new Bluntium Twelve computer.

  It was so simple.

  All I had to do was make those things happen in real life. That’s all.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Secrets and Spies

  I learned a lot during that week before Christmas vacation.

  I learned about the science fair and the grand prize. I learned that Mr. Lenny Cordo did not work for a circus. I learned that I wanted to win that Bluntium Twelve computer. I learned that sometimes my dad can be a K-I-A/D-I-A. I learned about the scientific method.

  And I learned that just because you’re in third grade, it doesn’t mean you can’t read some long words.

  Like “electromagnets.” That’s the fancy name for the kind of magnets you make with wire and iron and electricity. That’s something else I learned. Because the rest of that week before Christmas, I read all I could about magnets.

  And another thing I learned is that a know-it-all can’t really be a know-it-all. Nobody can know everything. There’s too much. If you did know everything, your head would explode or something.

  But I guess nobody ever told that to Kevin and Marsha. They really wanted to know everything, all the time.

  But there was something they didn’t know. And they knew they didn’t know it.

  They didn’t know what my science fair project was.

  At first, Kevin tried to pretend he didn’t care. The day before vacation, we had to turn in our permission slips. Mrs. Snavin told us to bring them to her desk. I stood up, and Kevin got in line behind me. I could tell he did it on purpose.

  Kevin tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned around, he gave me this fake smile and said, “So, Jake, what are you doing your project on?”

  I said, “I don’t think I want to tell anybody.”

  He said, “Why not? It doesn’t matter if people know. I’m doing mine on ants.”

  Kevin stared at me with his pale blue eyes. He didn’t blink. He was waiting for me to tell. Especially since he had just told me what his project was.

  But I just smiled and nodded. I said, “Ants. Yeah, ants are cool.” And then I turned away because I had to hand my slip to Mrs. Snavin.

  Kevin followed me back to my table. “So what’s your project, Jake?”

  I said, “I’m still kind of thinking about it.”

  Kevin said, “So what is it? What are you thinking about?”

  I said, “I’ll show you at the science fair.”

  Kevin pressed his lips together and made a mad face. Then he walked back to his own table.

  You see, I’m a good secret keeper.

  Two years ago, Abby broke a little china statue my mom had on a shelf. Mom loved it because she said it looked like Abby. That’s why Abby loved it, too.

  One day Abby pushed a chair over to the shelf and she took it down. When she started playing with it, the head broke off.

  Abby brought it to me. She was crying. She was afraid she would get in big trouble. I used some white glue to put the head back on. I was very careful. You couldn’t even tell it was broken. I put it back on the shelf. And I promised I would keep it a secret. And I did.

  Of course, about a week later, Abby told Mom about the statue herself. And Mom wasn’t even mad. Even so, I kept the secret.

  And then there was the time a friend of mine was at the YMCA camp with me. In the middle of the night he woke me up. He whispered, “Jake… I… I wet my bed. What should I do?”

  That’s the kind of thing a kid can get a bad nickname for. So I helped him get the sheet off his bunk. It was a plastic mattress, so that was good. I got my extra sheet out of my trunk, and we put it on the mattress. Then we stuck the wet sheet under his bed and went back to sleep.

  No one ever found out, and I never told.

  And don’t even try to guess which friend it was, because I’m not telling. Ever. It’s a secret.

  So I decided my science fair project was going to be a secret, too. Why tell anybody? Especially Kevin Young.

  And Marsha? She never asked. She just snooped. And she was lousy at it. It was like I had radar. I could always tell when Marsha was trying
to spy on me.

  So I let her see me work, and I let Kevin see me, too. It was during our library period on the last day before vacation. I let Marsha see me check out a book on snakes.

  Then I let Kevin see me looking at stuff about sharks in the encyclopedia.

  Then I used Encarta to look up an article about weasels, and I left it on the computer screen a long time. I even took some notes. And Marsha saw me.

  Then, ten minutes later, when Kevin was waiting at the printer, I printed out this article about rodents with a big picture of a rat. When I went to get it, Kevin handed it to me with a smile.

  And I smiled back.

  Near the end of the library time, I saw Kevin and Marsha whispering together. They looked like they were arguing. Kevin probably thought my project was about rats and sharks, and Marsha probably thought I was studying snakes and weasels.

  They didn’t get my joke. What I did was study them. And I had discovered that Kevin reminded me of a cross between a shark and a rat, and Marsha was like a snake and a weasel.

  What they didn’t know was that in the bottom of my backpack, down in a safe dark place, I had three great books: All About Magnets; Magnets You Can Make; and Winning Science Fair Projects. And those three books were enough to help me win my new computer.

  Because the best thing I learned that week before vacation was this: To be a good know-it-all, you don’t have to know what anybody else is doing. And you don’t need to know everything. You just have to know enough.

  Plus it helps if you have a big drawer full of junk.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Dropouts

  Then it was Christmas vacation. That’s always been my favorite time of year. Where we live, there’s almost always snow at Christmas. And there’s nothing better than snow plus no school.

  But this vacation was different.

  On Christmas morning I was waiting at the top of the stairs with Abby. Was I thinking about all the presents under the tree in the living room? No. I was thinking about magnets.

  And after the big Christmas dinner, and after Gram and Grampa went home, did I play with my new LEGO motor kit for the rest of the afternoon? No. I dug around in Dad’s workshop. I was looking for wire and pieces of iron.

  And it was like that all week. Every day I did some work on my project. I read my books. I made some drawings. I used the scientific method and I wrote things down.

  • • •

  One day I had Mom take me to the hardware store. We bought four big batteries. Each one was as heavy as a jar of peanut butter—a full one. We bought two of the biggest nails I had ever seen. They were about a foot long, and thicker than my pointer finger. And then we went to RadioShack and bought two big spools of thin wire.

  That was what my vacation was like. When I wasn’t working on my project, I was thinking about it.

  I mean, I didn’t work on it the whole week, not every second. One day I went sledding with Willie. We had a great time, and we didn’t talk about our projects, not even once.

  And I did build this amazing LEGO machine. Which Abby wrecked.

  So even a big science fair project can’t ruin Christmas. But it came pretty close.

  The week after vacation, Kevin went from being a know-it-all to a show-it-all. You know how I worked to keep my project a secret? Kevin worked even harder to show and tell everyone about his. All the time.

  If kids walked past Kevin’s table, he would start telling all about his ants. And if they tried to walk away, he’d say, “And look what else I found out!”

  Kevin worked on a big poster at the table by the windows. He just left it lying there for everyone to see. The poster was great, it really was—and it wasn’t even half done.

  In the gym on Tuesday, Kevin lay down on the floor by the wall. He started looking at some ants with a magnifying glass. They were in a long line, marching toward the door to the cafeteria. When kids came around, he told about how he had found out the way ants smell things. And how their eyes and jaws work.

  And Kevin brought these amazing pictures. He took them with a digital camera. He printed them out on the color printer during library period. He showed them to everybody.

  On Thursday I was waiting in line with Willie to buy ice-cream sandwiches. I said, “So did you start your project over vacation?”

  He said, “Yeah, I got some done. But I’m not going to be in the science fair. And four other kids in my class, they’re quitting, too.”

  I didn’t understand. I said, “What do you mean?” Willie peeled back the paper and bit off a corner of his ice-cream sandwich. He said, “I quit the science fair. It’s too much trouble. Besides, everybody knows Kevin’s going to win.”

  I was still confused, and Willie could tell.

  He said, “You’ve seen Kevin’s stuff about ants, right? It’s really good. And so is Karl Burton’s stuff. In my class? His project is about simple machines. But I think Kevin’s is better.”

  And then I got it. I got what Kevin had been doing all week.

  I said, “Don’t you see, Willie? Don’t you see? That’s what Kevin wants. He’s been showing off his science project so kids like us will drop out. He set a trap, and you walked into it!”

  Willie shrugged. “Yeah, I guess so. But what’s the point? It wasn’t any fun to work on.”

  Willie kept squeezing the ice cream out of the middle of his ice-cream sandwich so he could lick it off.

  I said, “But what about the Bluntium Twelve? And a whole year of free Internet? Don’t you want to win that?”

  Willie shrugged again. “I mean, sure. That would be great. But I don’t really need a new computer. And who wants to just try to beat Kevin all the time?”

  That made me think. And I got madder and madder at Kevin. He didn’t really break any rules, but what he was doing didn’t seem fair.

  And I got mad at Marsha because she was as bad as Kevin. All week long she had been telling everyone about her project, too. She was going to prove that she could fool grass seeds into growing upside down.

  And then I got mad at Mr. Lenny Cordo. I thought it was all his fault that everyone was so upset about the science fair. Everyone was going nuts about his new computers.

  And then I got mad at Mrs. Karp and Mrs. Snavin and all the other grown-ups. They were the ones who let Wonky’s Super Computer Store talk them into this whole idea.

  And when I ran out of other people to get mad at, I got mad at myself.

  I had turned myself into a know-it-all. I had gotten as mean as Kevin and as sneaky as Marsha. I had practically ruined Christmas so I could win the big prize.

  But, worst of all, back when Willie wanted to be my partner, what did I do? I sent him off on his own. I threw him into the shark tank with Kevin and into the snake pit with Marsha. Willie and I could have had fun working on a project. Together.

  All Thursday afternoon my thoughts went around and around. I got sick of the whole mess. And I decided there was only one thing to do.

  I was going to forget about Kevin and Marsha.

  I was going to forget about Mrs. Karp and Mrs. Snavin.

  I was going to forget about Mr. Lenny Cordo. And his Bluntium Twelve computer.

  I was going to quit the stupid science fair, too, just like my best friend, Willie.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Sticking Together

  After I talked with Willie on Thursday afternoon, I felt like quitting the science fair. I really did.

  I didn’t talk to anyone on the bus after school. When I got home, I went right to my room.

  Books and papers were spread all over the top of my desk. I had big batteries and spools of wire and giant nails spread around on the floor. I had markers and poster boards sticking out from under my bed.

  The more I looked at all that stuff, and the more I thought about Willie, the madder I got.

  And right then, I knew I couldn’t quit. I just couldn’t. I couldn’t let Kevin and Marsha push everyone out of the way.

 
Then I got an idea. I looked around on my desk until I found the science fair booklet. Then I read the rules again. And for the first time in three or four hours, I smiled.

  • • •

  On Friday morning, I had my dad drive me to school. That way, I got there about ten minutes before the buses. I didn’t talk much in the car.

  When we were almost there, Dad said, “So, how’s the science fair coming? It’s next week, right?”

  I shook my head. “Nope. It’s the week after. And I guess it’s okay.”

  “Anything I can help with? I’ve never made electromagnets, but I think I understand how they work.”

  I smiled and said, “Thanks, but I’m supposed to do the work myself. It says that in the rules.”

  We pulled up at the front door of the school. Dad said, “I’m sure you’re doing a terrific job. But maybe I could at least look things over.”

  I said, “Sure. That’d be good.”

  Dad leaned over and gave me a kiss on the cheek. “Have a great day, Jake.”

  I went into the office and asked Mrs. Drinkwater for permission to go to my room before the first bell. Mrs. Drinkwater is the school secretary. She’s a good person to know. Even though Mrs. Karp is the principal, I think Mrs. Drinkwater runs my school most of the time. Because if you want to find out anything, you talk to Mrs. Drinkwater. Unless you’re in trouble. Then you talk to Mrs. Karp.

  When I got to my room, Mrs. Snavin was sitting at her desk using a calculator.

  I guess my shoes were too quiet, because when I said, “Mrs. Snavin?” she jumped about a foot and let out this little squeal. “Oooh!—It’s you, Jake. That gave me a fright.”

  I said, “Sorry, Mrs. Snavin. But I have to talk with you. You know Willie, my friend in Mrs. Frule’s class? I want to be partners with him for the science fair.”

  Mrs. Snavin frowned. “The fair is the week after next. I think it’s a little late to be choosing up partners.”