He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

by Trish Ryan

  My wonderful agent, Elisabeth Weed: Thank you for “getting it” right from the start, and being my sounding board and advocate. You’re brilliant, and I’m blessed to have you on my team. My editor, Chris Park: Thank you for your amazing heart for this story. You sorted through an awful lot of dross to get to the silver, and I’m so grateful to have had the benefit of your discerning eye, great sense of humor, and tough-love. Thanks for caring enough to tell me when I needed to get back to work! Sarah Sper: Thank you for brainstorming sessions, encouragement, and pitching in your considerable talents to shape my chapters. The other members of the Hachette Team: Rolf Zettersten, Lori Quinn, Harry Helm, Manuel Muñoz, Kathy Antrim, Jana Burson, Preston Cannon, and the amazing sales force—your skills have made my project bigger, better, faster, stronger—you’re my heroes! Thank you.

  Thank you, Andrea Shea, for making me look so much better than I would if left to my own devices (and keeping me laughing in the process), and Donald Martelli for capturing that on film. Thank you, Meg Raymond, for Web site genius. Special thanks to my patient early readers, Steve Ryan, Paul Griffiths, and Dave Schmelzer—you saw the worst of the early drafts and somehow managed to dig through to the good parts.

  While writing this book, I turned again and again to the songs of Nicole Nordeman for inspiration. Thank you, Nicole, for wrenching open the creative side of my brain and bringing order to my questions. I also devoured books by Elizabeth Gilbert, Lauren Winner, Jeannette Walls, Donald Miller, Sarah Dunn, A. J. Jacobs, David Kuo, Madeleine L’Engle, Dave Burchett, Kristin Armstrong, Naomi Wolf, and Peggy Orenstein. Each of you has, in one way or another, raised the bar for me—thank you. I’m also grateful to the following people for their wise words on how to “do” this Jesus thing: Joyce Meyer, Stormie Omartian, Marcus and Joni Lamb, Juanita Bynum, Kevin Lehman, Bill and Lynne Hybels, Brendon Manning, Michelle McKinney-Hammond, and P. B. Wilson.

  And finally, to the two men this book is about: the right God, and the right guy.

  Jesus: thank you for chasing me so persistently, for offering your hand over and over again, and showing me the difference between a relationship with you and all the stuff I thought it meant to be a Christian. Thank you for making good on all your promises, and for introducing me to a spiritual world that exceeds my expectations every day. Thank you for giving me hope for what is possible for all of us. I love you.

  Steve: I’m amazed by how closely my heart for you resembles my thanks to Jesus—thank you for chasing me so persistently, for offering your hand over and over again, and showing me the difference between a relationship with you and all the stuff I thought it meant to be a woman, a girlfriend, a wife. Thank you for making good on all your promises, and for introducing me to a marriage that exceeds my expectations every day. Thank you for loving me like Jesus, and being so very worthy of my respect. I love you.