“Where are your parents?”
“They probably think I’m still sleeping. They left for work early this morning.”
“Are you going to be alright?”
I nodded.
“Are you sure?” he asked, concerned.
“Yes.”
He was silent for a moment and then said, “Here, let’s get you inside so you can clean yourself up.” He lifted me into his arms, and carried me into the house like a small child. When we were in the entry way, he set me down carefully.
“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?” he asked, still holding my shoulders, probably afraid that I would collapse again.
“I’ll be…fine.”
“Do you think you’ll be alright to go to the movie today? I don’t want you to go if you’re hurt.”
I had forgotten about the movie. “Yeah. I’ll be fine by then. I just need to take a shower,” I said.
“Are you sure?” His light brown eyes stared into mine.
I nodded.
“Hey, I’ll be here working until about three. I'll have to go home and shower but can I drive you up to DeKalb?”
“Um…sure.”
“Okay. I’m sorry, but I really don’t trust you with a vehicle right now.” He chuckled. I tried to laugh with him, but it hurt my chest, so I smiled instead.
“Go clean yourself up.” He smiled. “I’ll see you later,” he said as he leaned down and kissed the top of my head. I smiled. That was the first time he had kissed me, and I felt a spark run through my body. Even if it wasn’t on the lips, it was special to me. I watched him as he let go of my shoulders and walked out the door.
I carefully walked upstairs and into my bathroom to take a shower. I looked at myself in the mirror as I walked in. I looked like crap. I felt like it too. My cheek was slightly bruised and my hair was all frizzy and messy. I looked at my arms again and saw they were pinkish purple and there were also scratches covering parts of them. My right arm wasn’t bad; it was just red and had the same scratches as my left. My stomach was aching because it was so sore. I couldn’t believe Spencer had seen me like that.
I took a hot shower, and the warm water loosened up some of the sore muscles in my body; but it also hurt the cigarette burn on my stomach. After my shower, I got dressed in jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. I put my wet hair up in my usual ponytail and went to sit on my bed. It was a little easier to walk since my muscles were less sore.
On my bed, I opened my backpack and grabbed my phone. I checked the time; it was one thirty. So it must have been about one o’clock when I woke up that day. Well, I wasn’t really sleeping, more like crying while lying down.
I got out my CD player and listened to my Celine Dion CD.
I began listening to a song called “This Time”. The song is about a girl who is being abused by her lover.
This time is the last time. I know that my eyes have seen too much. This nightmare, it’s not fair, and I’ve had enough.
Realizing that the song reminded me of my life, I started crying as I sang along to the second part of the chorus.
You break me, and as I bleed, you just say you’re sorry. You call this love, but this time, your lies are not enough, this time.
And then I realized there were two exceptions to the similarities between my life and the song.
One: She was talking about being abused by her lover; my stepdad abuses me.
Two: Her abuser says he’s sorry after he hits her; Michael doesn’t.
Listening to that song reminded me of my mom. At first, Maddie was just an innocent young woman who decided to make bad choices with Violet and Clayton’s dads. She actually married mine, and she thought they’d be together forever. When she met Michael, it was just an innocent marriage again. She was a victim, too. But all the times that Maddie had told me things would get better, and that she was going to get rid of Michael never came true. I shook my head. Obviously, that wasn’t happening.
I decided to go downstairs and watch TV afterwards. I put my stuff back into my backpack, and carefully walked downstairs. I sat on the couch, and set my bag down next to me. I turned on the TV and started to watch one of my favorite movies, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.Grandma always kept DVDs in the cabinet next to the TV. I was able to watch almost the whole movie before Spencer came to drive us to DeKalb. He had changed into jeans and a clean white T-shirt.
As we walked out to his car, Spencer must have still been worried about how stable I was, because he kept one arm securely around my waist as we walked. He helped me into the car and went over to the driver’s side.
The drive up to DeKalb was a little quieter than I would have expected. Spencer and I talked a little bit; but there were times of deep thought and silence.
I put one of Spencer's Michael Buble CDs on, and listened to him sing along to it. I loved hearing his amazing singing voice. He was probably better than Michael Buble himself.
When we arrived at the theater, the rest of the group was already there, crowded around Dean’s black BMW convertible. Spencer and I got out of the car and headed over toward them. After a few minutes of talking outside in the parking lot, Spencer held my hand as we all walked inside.
I enjoyed the movie a lot more than I thought I would, even though I’d never been one for thrilling horrors. I had only seen a couple of movies in Chicago; I never really had enough money to go to the theater.
Spencer had his arm around my shoulder the entire time, and I kept my head cuddled next to his chest. About fifteen minutes before the movie ended, Spencer whispered my name.
I lifted my head, and looked up at his face. His light brown eyes were staring into mine. I began to lose my breath. He looked like he was concentrating on something.
“I’m glad you came today.” He smiled.
“M…Me too.” Looking into his eyes was making me lose my train of thought. He slowly brought his head down and hesitated, making my heart pound faster and harder than it ever had before. His warm breath washed across my face as he sighed softly. His eyes closed at the same time mine did, and his soft lips pressed lightly against mine. My heart thundered in my chest, and I lost my breath. I pressed my lips against his with more enthusiasm, yet just as soft as he had. Even though it was our first kiss, it was not just a little peck on the lips. Although, he kissed me as if I was the most fragile thing in the world. He was probably just nervous. I knew that I was. As I kissed him back, my heart seemed to fill completely. It was like I had everything I ever wanted. He was refilling the pieces of my heart that Michael and Maddie had taken away. I had felt weak all of my life; not anymore. He gave me hope, and that was all I needed at that moment. I needed him. When the kiss ended, I wished that it hadn’t. He smiled my favorite smile and lightly stroked my face with his hand. I rested my head next to his chest again, blushing and smiling.
* * *
When the movie was over, we all walked back out into the parking lot. Jacquie and Annie were talking about how scared they were by the Joker, while Jeremy and Mike were laughing at them and trying to convince them that he wasn’t that scary, and that it was just an actor in make-up.
“He’s not real.” Jeremy laughed as he wrapped his arm around Jacquie’s waist.
“I know that. It was just creepy.”
“Girls are such wimps.” Mike chuckled.
“No we’re not!” Annie protested.
“Never mind.” Spencer laughed. “Where do you guys want to eat?”
“It doesn’t matter to me.” Mike said.
“Me either. I just want to eat.” Jeremy laughed, hitting his stomach. “Dean, do you have any suggestions?”
“Um, how about Applebee’s? It’s just down the road,” he replied.
“I’m good with Applebee’s. How about you, Annie?” Michael asked.
“Fine with me,” she said.
“Okay, let’s meet at Applebee’s. As I said, it’s just down the road,” Dean said.
“Alright.” Jeremy said
as they walked towards Jacquie’s Lincoln Navigator.
We all walked into the restaurant and were seated at a long table. We talked and ate, and we had a lot of fun. As we were finishing our meal, I saw Matt and a couple of his guy friends all walk into the restaurant.
“Hey, Syd,” he called as they walked towards us.
“Hi, Matt.” I smiled.
“Who do we have here?” he asked, looking around at our table. I saw his eyes lock with Spencer’s for a second.
“Spencer Stevenson,” Matt muttered.
“Spencer’s my—”
“I’m her boyfriend,” he finished for me. “And how do you know Sydney?” He took my hand under the table.
Matt smiled. “I used to be best friends with her when she’d come visit. You should remember. We met up again a few weeks ago.”
I smiled shyly.
“Hey, Jacquie,” Matt said.
“Hello,” she replied dully.
I could see the tension between my friends and Matt, and wondered what could be going on with them.
“Sydney, you didn’t tell me you were with Spencer,” Matt said.
“I didn’t know you wanted to know,” I said shyly.
He smiled. “Yeah, you should have told me. Spencer and I used to be good friends before I moved.” He then turned to me and said, “Hey, well, call me, and we’ll hang out sometime.”
I caught the glare Spencer threw at Matt. “Geez!” Matt held his hands up in surrender. “She’s my friend. She always has been. That’s it.”
“Matt, come on, we’re gonna order!” One of his friends called as they sat down in a booth near ours.
“Coming,” he replied. “See ya, Syd.” He winked at me, and walked away.
Spencer was silent as he drove me home. I didn’t know why he was so furious about Matt, but I didn’t want to make him mad by asking, so I kept my mouth shut. Spencer didn't call me or text me on Sunday, and I was afraid Matt was the reason.
At school the next Monday, Spencer walked up to my locker with a painful expression.
“Sydney?” he asked as I pulled out my Biology textbook.
“Yeah?” I murmured, closing my locker and looking at him.
“I want to apologize for Saturday night,” he said with a sigh.
“Why?” I asked. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I should have told you about Matt. It’s my fault—”
“No, it’s not. I—I just don’t get along with Matt Johnson very well.” he explained. “I made a big deal out of it, and I’m sorry. If he’s your friend and you trust him.... “
I smiled shyly. “I just started hanging out with him again. I just want to know him better.”
Spencer smiled. I was glad that I could make him happy.
“Hey, so what’s up with you and Matt Johnson?” Jeremy asked me during lunch.
“He used to be friends with me when I was little, sort of like Spencer was.”
“Oh, well, I hope he doesn’t try to—”
“Jeremy?” Spencer cut him off. “Do we really have to talk about this?”
“About what?” I questioned. What was going on?
“Nothing, just…nothing,” Jeremy replied.
Jacquie and Annie looked at me with an unfathomable expression.
I didn’t know what they were hiding from me, but it seemed as if everyone knew but me. What had happened with Matt and Spencer?
“Don’t worry about Jeremy. He just has the need to fill every silence,” Spencer said, as we walked to P.E.
“I don’t mind. He’s a nice guy.”
“Yeah. He’s always been a good friend. I met him in kindergarten. He was already friends with Jacquie, and I joined in.”
“And what about Annie and Mike and Dean?” I asked.
“They came in a few years later. We had some other friends in middle school, who hung out with us too, but some moved away, and some just moved on.”
“It’s nice that you were all able to stick together,” I told him. “In Chicago, I really didn’t have any friends. I was really quiet, and no one ever talked to me.”
Spencer took my hand in his. “You have friends here.”
We decided to go out to DeKalb to eat the next week, just Spencer and me. It was nice to get more alone time. We ate at a nice restaurant downtown, and I tried not to say anything about Matt.
“So, what’s your favorite sport?” Spencer chuckled as we asked questions back and forth over dinner.
“Probably soccer.”
“Okay, favorite food?”
I thought for a moment. “Cheese ravioli and garlic bread.”
“Italian, nice.”
“What’s yours?” I asked.
“Popcorn.”
I laughed. “Is that really even a food?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugged, grinning widely. “It’s the first thing that came into my head.”
Spencer drove me home in my car. He took one look at my gas gauge and pulled into a gas station. He insisted on paying to fill up my gas tank. I told him my parents had left early that morning for work, and I had forgotten to ask them for gas money. I told him not to, but he was very stubborn.
We glided down the empty roads in the darkness, singing along to Michael Buble CDs.
“Can I ask you something?” Spencer said after a deep silence.
“Sure.”
“Are you happy here in Shabbona?”
“Yes. Why?”
“You look so sad. Every day when you get to school, you have this sad look on your face. It makes me worried. Is something wrong?” he sighed. “I want to make you happy, Sydney.” He didn’t look at me; he looked straight out the windshield, into the black night. There were many things I wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell him that he was the best boyfriend a girl could ever want. I wanted to tell him that the reason I was so sad every morning was because of my parents. I was ready to trust him with my secret; I was finally going to have a chance to do what I wanted to do. But I would have to wait.
Chapter 6
RECOVERY
My eyes opened to see a bright, white, ceiling. I tried to lift myself up to see where I was, but something stopped me. I looked over and caught a glimpse of IV needles in my arm. Off to my left, Matt and Spencer stood arguing.
“What did you do?” Matt asked Spencer as he saw me. I’d barely opened my eyes, so he probably didn’t know I was awake.
“I didn’t do anything! Some drunk driver did it! How much do you want to bet it was you?” Spencer asked harshly.
“I wasn’t drunk last night, Stevenson, so it couldn’t have been me. If you’d been more careful, none of this would have happened. Some boyfriend you are.... “
“It’s not my fault! Why are you even here?!”
I was about to stop them, but they continued as if I wasn’t there.
“Because I’m her friend! We’ve been friends longer than you two have.”
“Whatever Matt, think how you want. I don’t care about you.”
I sighed and put my head back on the pillow, closing my eyes.
“What’s wrong with her?” he asked Spencer.
“She hasn’t woken up yet, Matt. What do you think is wrong? Just leave, Matt.”
“No, she’s my friend. I have a right to be here. Just because Belle—”
“Just shut up, Matt,” Spencer said angrily.
I’d had enough of this. I opened my eyes and looked at them. “Hello,” I said. “I’m right here.”
Spencer looked at me with bright eyes, came over to me, and took my hand.
He had a huge gash across his forehead covered by red stitches. Bruises covered his neck and arms. I looked at my own body. I was in a hospital gown with a white blanket over me. I must be worse than Spencer; but I don’t feel any pain. I looked up again to see him looking at me, his expression filled with relief.
“You’re okay,” he sighed.
I still wasn’t sure what had happened to us. Why were we in a hospital? The l
ast thing I remember was that I was about to tell Spencer the truth about Michael and Maddie, and then everything went black. The gash on Spencer’s forehead looked pretty deep, but it didn’t seem to be bothering him.
“You are okay, aren’t you?”he asked me.
I threw my arms lightly around his neck and pulled his face to mine. He kissed me as softly as possible, like he had at the movie the week before during our first kiss. I let go of him when I had to catch my breath.
“What happened?” I asked.
“We got in a car accident on the way home last night. Some drunk driver was going too fast and ran a stop sign…” He trailed off.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“I’m fine. This isn’t that bad.” His hand lightly brushed across the stitches on his forehead.
“Matt?” I asked softly as I saw him still standing behind Spencer. Why couldn’t they get along?
“Yeah?” He came up behind Spencer and smiled. “How are you feeling?”
“I feel fine.”
One of the doctors came in and signaled for Spencer to come to him. He told him something, and as Spencer came back to us he said, “Come on, Matt. He wants to talk to Sydney alone.”
“Okay,” Matt said, moving past Spencer and the doctor. “See ya, Syd. I hope you feel better.”
Spencer looked back at me once before he followed Matt out of the room.
“Well, Miss Baker, I am glad to see you are up and well. We were all a little worried about you.” The doctor said to me.
“I’m okay,” I told him.
“Well, we will have to see. Can you sit up please?”
I sat up on the bed and he shined a small, thin flashlight in my eyes.
“Your vitals look good,” he noted. “Do you have a headache? Do you feel any pain at all?”
I shook my head. “I just feel tired.”
He nodded. “Well, that’s perfectly normal. I think you will be alright.”
I nodded. “So I can go home?”
“In a moment. Your mother is out in the waiting room, ready to take you home.”
Taking Chances Page 5