by H. Q. Frost
"Are you kidding?" I whimper, trying not to attack or cry. "How can I make peace with this?"
"Because you have no choice."
"Why do you think she won't find out I didn't really die?" This idea is the stupidest thing I've ever been subjected to.
"Because I have no choice but to hope." He turns his head and I slowly get to my feet.
"I wish I never met you. I wish I wasn't a Reif. I wish your fucking dick found a different hole to fulfill your sick fantasies." I walk away from him, turning my back because I mean what I just said. And for once the clarity inside me makes me think I could walk out of here and never think about Callum Carbon again.
"While the situation we're in is my fault, I did not start the issue."
"Who the fuck did, Callum!" I scream as I turn to face him.
He's on his feet now. "You, Magdelena."
"Me?" I scoff. "How the fuck is this my fault? Maybe if you told me your family is fucked up beyond belief I would have stuck around for twelve stupid fucking months so you didn't get murdered. Believe it or not, dickhead, I really, really fucking loved you. I couldn't be with you, but I loved you and I wouldn't have let you die over something so fucking stupid. Your family is truly stupid, Callum. Simple as that." I throw my hands up in a shrug, but when he barrels toward me I flinch.
A hand on my throat, and one on my shoulder shove me until I hit the wall. It was like a slam but I didn't feel the pressure. And here we go again. My stupid fucking body reacting the way it wants to.
"And I wanted you back of your own free will," he growls in my face. "I didn't want you returning to me because I was going to be sentenced to death. I don't fear death, I fear leaving what I've brought into this world. Had I known you were pregnant, none of this would have happened, because I would have dealt with this before she even found out." His grip is still on my neck and his hand is pressed into my chest to hold me to the wall.
"How'd she even find out?" I whisper.
"Kipper," he says with disgust. "I don't fucking know what was done behind my back when we were married, Magdelena, but his obsession with you started well before she turned him on to you."
Kip is not obsessed with me. I know all about obsession.
"Nothing. Nothing happened behind your back." I drop my gaze because it hurts that he thinks I would do that. But why shouldn't he think it? I ended up with Kip. Makes me seem shady as hell.
"You say that, but the situation tells me otherwise." He releases his hold on me but doesn't step away.
"I know, and I'm sorry." When I take his hand, he pulls it back.
"Do you want to know what a man like me does when he's fucked up everything?"
No.
"What, Callum?" All my fight is gone.
"I reset the chess board without the fallen pieces."
Before he can turn away, I grab his arm. "What are you saying?" I'm not into talking metaphors right now but I think I know what he means.
"I'll fix this the best I can and you'll get what you've always deserved." He looks from my hand on his arm, to my face.
"And what's that, Callum?" The feeling he means death makes me shiver.
"Kipper."
"What?" I screech as he walks away from me. "What?" I run up behind him, gripping his arm. "I don't want Kip! I don't want him." With a tug, I get him to face me. "I want you." Grabbing his face, I push to my toes and kiss his unresponsive lips. "Callum, please, please, I don't want Kip." Frantic kisses and pulling hands try to get him to react.
It takes a moment but he finally does, and when he does, it's a hurricane. I jump into his arms, wrapping my legs around him. He crosses the room to the couch and lays me back. His mouth is painfully kissing and biting, but in the way I like it. My jeans cut into my skin as he yanks them down my thighs, not bothering to get them all the way off. He kisses me and it's suddenly soft, washing a warm calmness over us. But when he thrusts inside of me, I gasp, having not realized he was even freed from his pants.
"Breathe, Magdelena," he says and I realize I've been holding my breath, only to try and stop myself from screaming.
As I exhale I tighten around him and his forehead pushes to the bridge of my nose.
"I fucking loved you. Too much." His thrusts become punishing, but in the way I need. "You destroyed me while I tried to break you. And you never broke."
I try, but I can't see his face. He sounds like he's haunted by these thoughts and I can't stand it.
"Callum." I try to grab his face to look at him but he won't let me.
He grabs my wrists and pins my hands above my head, still keeping his face tilted out of my sight. My jeans scratch and pinch but his dick fills me with every thrust and the two sensations combined make me peak.
"I'm going to come," I tell him, biting my lip.
"I shouldn't let you," he growls in return and delicious panic fills my stomach.
Why do I want this? The old Callum.
"I'm going to come," I whimper, digging my nails into his hands as he keeps my wrists restrained.
"Fuck," he grunts like he's battling with letting me or stopping and fucking us both out of an orgasm. "You broke me, Pleasure. Checkmate."
I get what I need and my orgasm jolts through me making Callum release my wrist and clamp his hand over my mouth to mute my scream. My orgasm was too intense to realize if Callum got his, but he's off me, his back to me, and he's fixing his belt.
"Callum." I reach to touch him, my fingers only skimming down his back as he steps away.
He turns his head, but not to look at me, just to make sure I hear him. "You don't want Kip, Magdelena? Well, you can't have me."
My mouth hangs open as he leaves the room and I hear the door lock.
This is a never ending battle.
Motherfucker!
"I should have let her kill you," I snarl at Kipper as we stand face to face for the first time since this happened.
When I got a call from him, revealing one of my grandmother's men was on his way to New York, I had to act fast. And unfortunately I needed his help. The only way Kipper found out was he has an acquaintance working for the old woman. That man gave the warning that Kipper was one of her targets. With some bribe money, and out of respect for Kipper, he said he would report back with the news my grandmother wants.
Simple as that. Except not. In turn I had to…give Kipper Magdelena. I was never going to have her again. I'm headed back to the estate to prepare myself for the authorities who will come to look for Poppy. Then I’m going to conjure the next step in this. It's not over, far from it, but me and Magdelena are.
"Your daughter would be dead too, Cal, don't forget that. I did you a fucking favor," he seethes back at me.
"So help me god, if this is a setup, you will die a thousand deaths rained down on you from the gods above, Kipper. Even if I'm dead. That woman in there isn't only under my protection, I have other people that won't hesitate to make you hurt." The only person I have on my side is Lol, and he doesn't know any of this yet.
I'm not sure how or when I'll tell him, but he'll eventually have to find out. But it was best to keep him in the dark about it now. He did the one thing I asked him to; call and check up on Magdelena. That was when mine and Kipper's plan was put into action. And the only reason we had to take Poppy first is because Magdelena won't accept this without leverage, so until that happens, Poppy will remain with Gee in Australia. To put my daughter through this is heartbreaking, but this is what has to happen.
"Did you touch her?" Kipper steps closer.
I want to rub it in that I just fucked her on the couch. I want him to know she doesn't want him. But I wasn't supposed to touch her. We both knew she'd listen to me, let me explain, but I wasn't supposed to touch her. She's his now, even if she doesn't want him. He is the one that will look after her and Poppy when I'm gone.
"You've been fucking my wife for two years. I should end you for that."
"She wanted the divorce. That's why she signed."
Th
ere is no point in telling him I know the truth, because he probably doesn't.
"All of those documents were false and you know it!" My fists ball and I'm ready to take back everything I said.
She was going to be my pawn and he was going to die for ever trying to place her on his board.
"But the document we both signed less than twenty-four hours ago wasn't." His hand pushes against my chest and he puts a step between us. "You're through with her, Carbon. You better have let her know."
"If anything happens to her or my daughter." I grab his coat collar.
"Forgot about them both. I almost had you erased. You come around her again and the deal is off. It'll be every man for himself." He shoves me.
Getting my footing, I stand to go after him but the car pulls up and bright lights temporarily blind me, making me think it through before I attack.
If Lol weren't monitored so closely by my grandmother, he would be the one to look after Magdelena. Kipper is my only answer, and now each of our boards has two kings, but soon enough he will dominate mine.
Cole says I look taller, but I feel smaller. Some sort of weight's been lifted, but at what cost?
An American detective came to the estate and my alibi held strong. Tim Meadows has no idea if I was in California doing what I was supposed to be for his company, but the deal was sealed, so he assumes I was. Thus giving me the alibi I was with him in California, because if his wife found out we weren't together, Tim would have more issues than NYPD on his case.
My great grandmother was questioned and the hag played senile. Myself and her army backed her, but when Lol was questioned, I wasn't sure what to expect. Luckily, knowing nothing, he didn't know what to tell them.
What I took away from the detective before he left is that Kipper is the main suspect, but he's also missing. While I didn't offer my opinion on the situation, the detective was fully aware Kipper and Magdelena are not a subject that sits comfortably with me.
"Daddy, do you have a wife?" Cole asks out of the blue and I quickly look to my son whose focus is on a book in his hands. He can't read it, but the pictures tell their own story.
"No," I state, wanting to take the book away.
"Read this." He shifts and shoves the book at me. The demand, the anger on his face, his gears are turning and he's realizing his life is not as he sees in story books or on screen.
"Have you done your math today?"
"Read it," he says with more authority.
"Cole," I say calmly. "Don't speak to me that way. Use your manners."
"Father, read the book, please," he shouts and I jolt because he's getting upset.
Reaching over, I scoop him up and sit him in my lap. "What's wrong?" I pull his head to my chest and kiss his hair.
"I don't have a mother," he says and I hear the tears brewing.
"You do," I whisper and clear my throat. "But she's not in our lives."
"Why? I want a mommy like Denise." The crying has started but he won't face me. His cheek stays securely pressed to my chest.
My boy is too young to feel this pain.
"Who's Denise?"
"Dehlia's her mommy," he informs me.
I know a few of the live in staff have children, none Cole's age, but young enough he knows they're children and not staff.
Staring at the book, I'm not sure what to say, so I read. I read the happy story about a loving family with a mother and father and their son. They even have a dog they take on walks and feed treats to. By the end, he's invested in the story but he's crying. I toss the book, making note to throw it away and I grab him in a hug. Assuming my son would never notice what was missing, I didn't think we'd ever face this. When he's calm, we sit down to dinner. I can't help but feel if I didn't have an amped amount of stress, and I wasn't away from the house so often lately, that this wouldn't have come to light just yet.
When my great grandmother enters the dining room, I stare at her in confusion as she sits. I want to ask her if she needs something, but the staff serves her as if this was planned. Lol glances at me, but doesn't say anything.
"Grandmother, what do we owe the pleasure?"
She'd be a fool to believe I mean that.
"Cole brought it to my attention we don't do things as a family."
"Ahh," I mutter and look at my food, wishing I could warn Cole about her, but I won't do that to him.
"So I decided that we need to do more together." She smiles across the table at him and the happiness on his face breaks my heart.
My boy has no idea of the devil's intentions.
"Very good." The response to that cannot be said, so we'll keep it at that.
"I would like Cole to stay at my house a few days a week."
My fork clanks when I try to set it down. I'm holding on by a thread.
"Why?" I question.
"Because I'm the only mother figure he has. His mother is dead and he has no hope of her coming to her senses."
My heart speeds up and Lol pushes his chair back, wanting to help end this, but not sure what to do.
"Grandmother," I snap, but it's too late. Cole's curious glare ping pongs between us.
"My mother is dead?" Not three hours ago he was aware he had a mother but she wasn't in his life. He made peace with that, but this…this will stir up a new set of emotions he's not ready to process.
"No," I blurt.
"Yes. Of course, child. She gave you up and now she's dead. But Grandma would never give you up."
"Germaine," I bark and Cole flinches.
"Bite your tongue, Callum," she warns.
"Daddy?" Cole's blue eyes are swimming and my phone starts to ring.
Between my grandmother talking, the phone ringing, and Cole crying, I can't focus. I yank my phone from my pocket and quickly answer, "Yes, hello?"
"Callum, there’s a detective here, asking questions about Poppy and Magdelena," Gee whispers with anger.
"Is there?" I glance between the three faces at the table.
"Yes. What the fuck? Callum, tell me now."
"Do you have a houseguest?" I question if the detective discovered my little girl as my heart plummets.
"No," she growls. "My houseguest was enjoying a ride with her great uncle. They took the horses—"
"Horses?" I blurt. My three year old cannot ride a horse.
"She's safe with him. Goddammit, Callum. When a detective says I'm looking into the disappearance of Poppy and Magdelena Reif that tells me something is very wrong."
"Okay, Gee." I force a laugh. "I'm currently sitting down to supper with grandma, Cole, and Lol. Can I call you shortly and we'll discuss your visit?"
Feeling my grandmother's eyes on me, I don't look up. Gee doesn't know of all Germaine's twisted ways, but she has an idea, and she's about to be filled in as soon as I can make a private phone call.
"Gee?" my grandmother questions as soon as I hang up.
"Yes, grandmother," I grunt and quickly stand, scooping Cole out of his chair.
I look into his face then turn to her and glare. Without a word, I snatch his plate from the table and we move to another room where he can eat in peace, but he doesn't. He questions everything, including his existence. And if his mother hadn't already broken me, him questioning why he was born would have shattered my soul.
"Because I love you very much. And because I wanted you. You're my son and you are coal. You'll set fire to your enemies one day, son, and nothing will ever hurt you." I close my lips and my eyes drift closed.
I have to start conditioning my son to be as angry and cold as I am or he will never make it with his great great grandmother.
"Are you alone?" I ask into the phone.
"Just a moment," Gee responds. "Alright."
"What did you tell him?"
"Can we start with what the hell is going on?"
"Grandmother," I respond and hear her sigh. "She tried to kill Magdelena and Kipper."
Gee got an abrupt fill-in of the past four years when I a
sked her to harbor Poppy until I could pick her up.
"Oh, Callum," she whispers.
"What did you tell the detective?"
"That I didn't know who Poppy Reif was," she responds and my rapid heartbeat begins to slow. "And that I haven't seen Magdelena in years. That when she left you, all ties were cut. Because they were."
"Thank you."
"Callum, Adam can't know this and I don't know what to tell him." Her husband is affluential and if he speaks about a visit from his great niece, that news will travel.
I haven't gone through all this for it not to work.
"You'll have to tell him, Gee, because if grandmother gets word, Poppy's life will be in more danger."
"Oh, Callum," she whimpers again and I hear she's crying. "Why is this happening?"
"Why did you turn a blind eye to her dictatorship?" I accuse because it's the truth.
"Because I didn't want to be a Carbon." She sniffles.
"Well you got your wish and beyond this, I will never ask you for another favor."
"It's not about that." She sighs. "I'm worried about this little girl. And about you and Cole."
"I am trying to fix it all, Gee."
"How can you fix something so broken? I will…stand behind you if you were to have grandmother convicted."
"Please." I chuckle at the unlikelihood of that ever happening. "You know as much as I that there is no justice with something so corrupt."
"Lord." She sniffles again then breathes out a groan. "Now what?"
"I need you to plan a trip here because she heard me when you called earlier. And after you're dropped, Lol will take your place, and he will deliver Poppy to her mother."
"When?" she whispers and I hear giggles approaching the phone. "Callum, when?" she asks again when I stay quiet to hear the carefree innocence of my daughter.
"Three weeks."
I don't know if Magdelena has accepted any of this yet, and I've been dreading contacting Kipper, but I'll have to soon.
"Gee," I say before we disconnect. "Is Poppy happy?"
"As happy as a little girl who misses her life can be. I hope this was worth it, Callum."
The phone disconnects and I close my eyes, taking a deep breath. Was it?