by Paige Steele
Dinner with Ryan is good; I don’t let my nerves get the best of me. I don’t want him worrying that something is wrong. He needs to concentrate on the race tomorrow, not on me. I couldn’t live with myself if I caused his head to not be in the race, so this conversation will not happen until I know I have a couple days to talk to him about it.
Race day came and went just as quickly. Ryan won and it was incredible to see him back in his glory. He was on fire as he rode around the track. It was a fight between him and his Honda teammate as they went bar to bar over jumps, circling corners, and cruising through the whoop sections. Jesse won, while Cooper took fourth in their race after a bit of a crash over the large tabletop jump. He seems to be doing okay, but he’s got quite the large road rash on his right side, across his rib cage.
The pit in my stomach returns just as the wheels on the plane touch down back at home. Knowing this is it, the week that I need to come clean to Ryan, I can’t help but feel sick. My phone starts to ring as I turn the key in my lock at the apartment. It’s Ryan; he needs to catch the next flight out. He got a call from his dad, informing him that his mom hasn’t been feeling well. Even though his dad said stay, he wanted to be there. Once home, he found out that she has pneumonia and chose to stay home for a couple days to visit. I know that in the end, I’ll be struggling to find time to tell him, but I need to because after calling my manager and telling her to add me to the lineup, I know it is a done deal…I’ll be the first female at the starting gate in Texas.
Ryan
I was to return home two days ago but decided to stay for another day at my parents’. My mom had just gotten out of the hospital after her doctors put her in for IV fluids, and I wanted to be there for her, as well as my dad. It’s now Thursday, and I need to fly out again tomorrow for another race. Kenna wants to come over, but I end up telling her no. As much as I want to see her, I have to get my ass back on the practice track for the day. Taking off three full days probably wasn’t the smartest idea, but I didn’t have a choice; family comes first, always has, always will. I worked out and went for a run every day while I was home, but I should have been riding. So today is my day to bust my ass in the dirt.
Hot and exhausted, I climb the stairs to my room slowly. There’s a knock at the door, and I have half a mind to not answer it, until I hear Kenna’s voice on the other side of the door.
“Ryan, are you in there?”
“Kenna?” I shout at the door from the stairs.
“Yeah.”
“Let yourself in.” I stand here ready to drop.
She comes in and wants to talk. I’m not in any mood to open my mouth, other than to put food in it. To be honest, I’m not even in the mood to do much of anything else. I explain, as nicely as I can, that I need a shower and food, that’s it. She seems antsy about something, but once I’m lying down in bed, my eyes begin to close and as hard as I try to keep them open, there’s no hope. I fall asleep just as I hear her say, “Don’t worry about it, I can talk to you another time.”
I have two interviews to do once I land today, then one right after practice tomorrow. Though today is also packed with a promotional photo shoot for one of my sponsors as well, so it’s a bit crazy. Kenna has been somewhat quiet lately. I think it’s because I’ve been busy and haven’t been able to spend much time with her over the last week. Hopefully things slow down moving forward, so we can have some alone time. I’ve missed having her in my arms at night.
Once I am back at the hotel, all I want to do is take a hot shower, order room service, and have Kenna in my bed. I’ve taken care of ordering the food, Kenna’s on her way, and now I’m hanging my head under the water, hoping it wakes me up enough to make sweet love to the woman that has taken over my heart.
“Want company?” I hear her ask, as I rinse shampoo from my hair.
“I couldn’t think of anything better, but I’m not sure my girlfriend will be happy.”
“Oh, you have a girlfriend?” she asks shocked, as she steps under the water.
“I do and she’s pretty hot too.”
“Hot, huh?”
“Yeah, she is,” I say, as I start placing small sweet kisses to her lips.
“Well, you know what, Mr. Evans?”
“No, what?”
“She’s a pretty lucky girl, because I’m thinking you’re pretty hot yourself,” she says, trying to catch her breath.
“Kenna, you’re the one who’s strikingly beautiful. I can’t seem to get enough of you.” I turn her slowly away from me, while dragging my tongue over her shoulder, across the back of her neck, until my lips land on the other side.
The low moan that escapes her mouth turns my body instantly into a solid rock. I lose a bit of control as I take her hands, placing them on the granite-tiled wall, while continually assaulting her neck with my mouth. She leaves her hands where I left them, while mine start to roam over her body. Her hips begin to sway back and forth against me as I bend her forward slightly. I want nothing more than to sink deep inside her. I pull her tighter against me, so she can feel exactly what she does to my body. Another moan and I lose it, slowly finding myself sliding into her perfect body.
“You’re amazing, Princess.”
“Hmm…you are, too.”
These are the only words spoken, as I find myself lost in the passion; she meets me thrust for thrust, while still circling her hips. Reaching forward, touching just the right spot makes her fall apart at the same time I do. Holding her up with one arm around her waist, I steady myself with the other against the wall.
“I needed that and you.”
“Hmm, me, too.”
Pulling back, I release her, so she herself can stand upright and wash up. She looks breathtaking as she turns to face me. I can’t help but to stare. Watching the water cover and drip over her entire body starts to make my body stir again.
“I better get out, or we’ll be going for round two.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” She winks as she talks directly into my eyes.
“You, my girl, are in a bit of a naughty mood, aren’t you?” I kiss her lips and reach for a towel.
“Are you complaining?” she asks with a giggle.
“Not at all, but I want food, then I want you again in my bed. Or maybe I want food on you in my bed,” I say, raising my eyebrows back at her.
“Sounds like fun, but by now they probably took our food back. We’ve been in here a while.”
“No, when I ordered I told them to give us about an hour and a half, because I wasn’t sure when you’d get here.”
She turns to shut the water off, as I wrap a towel around her. Holding her for a short time, my hand rubs up and down over her towel covered back. I want her to feel the love that I have developed for her, in hopes that she feels the same. As I lean down to kiss her lips, there’s a knock on the door. Giving her a quick peck, I walk out with a towel around my waist to answer it.
The cart is brought in by room service, which happens to be a young lady that can’t stop staring at me as she pushes it forward. Kenna walks out with a robe on, giving her a glare as she watches from the doorway. Her arms are folded in front of her and her ankles are crossed. She is definitely irritated that this girl doesn’t even notice that she’s entered the room. I start to chuckle as I walk over, placing a soft kiss on her lips. The young lady immediately turns, seeing where I went and finds Kenna’s eyes locked on her. Looking down, the girl walks out.
“That was hot.”
“Excuse me?” She sounds pissed and I can’t help but laugh again.
“You giving the stink eye to that young lady. You know you have nothing to jealous about, right?”
“You come out, with just a towel on, and answer the door; of course she’s going to stare at you.”
“Yes, but I wasn’t staring back. Princess, she doesn’t hold a candle to you. But seeing the possessive side of you come out…made me hard,” I say, grabbing her han
d and placing it so she can feel exactly what I’m referring to. I kiss her one more time as I walk away.
“You’re a brat. You love it. Maybe I should come out with a towel tucked around me when room service comes next time.”
“First of all, I’m not a brat…I didn’t do anything to entice her.” Kenna smiles as she rolls her eyes at me, while I continue, “Second…I only care what you think, no one else matters, and third…you will never be answering a door in a towel, so don’t get any ideas, Princess.”
“You’re still a brat.” She pushes off the doorjamb and follows me over to the cart, placed in front of the window.
We both sit and eat, while talking about the race tomorrow. The rest of the night is spent with us watching some T.V. while snuggling, until I find her asleep on my chest. Shutting off everything, I pull her closer, and close my eyes, taking in the flowery vanilla scent that her body is sending me.
I swear the morning comes two seconds after I closed my eyes last night. Yet, I’m up and getting ready for the day ahead. My bike is calling my name and I can’t wait to get back on her. Yes, I call my bike a “her” because it is and she’s pretty, too.
After we are both ready, we load up in the truck I rented and head to the track. She’s off to the tent for Hyped Energy, while I prepare with my manager for the interview ahead. I am told that they will be asking about my private life; it seems the fans want to know.
An hour passes as I get stretched by the team’s trainer and introduced to a couple of new sponsors, then the T.V. host walks under the tent and asks if I’m ready. There are two chairs set up for us to sit in, as the lights and camera crew get everything else in place.
“Hello, I’m Jenny Lynn.” She stretches out her hand to me as she states her name.
“Hey, I’m Ryan.”
“How are you?”
“Things are going well.”
“Good, let me explain how this is going to work. I have a set of about five questions to ask you. We want to stick as much as we can to those questions, so we can get as much out of you for the interview. Then we’ll be out of your hair, and you can get back to doing what you do best…winning.”
“Sounds good to me. Let me just grab a pair of my goggles and a Hyped Energy drink to showcase during the interview.”
After both of us are settled on our chairs, a microphone is clipped on my jersey, as the lights are turned on, and the camera guy says we’re starting in five.
“You ready?”
“I am,” I answer her directly.
She starts off by saying my name, where I grew up and a bit of the history of how I got started into racing. Now for the questions.
“How’s your wrist?”
“It’s feels better every day, I barely have any pain anymore.”
“Is everything okay between you and Cooper Brewis? I mean, all the fans out there want to know if there is bad blood between you two, after the crash.”
“We are fine. There is absolutely no bad blood between us, at all. He is and always will be my best friend.”
“So it’s been said through the rumor mill that there is someone special in your life. Is that true?”
“It is. Kenna and I have been friends for a long time, and it recently has become more serious.”
“She’s one of the Hyped Energy Girls, I hear.”
“That she is.” I chuckle a little.
“So, is it going to be weird watching her race against your best friend in a couple weeks?”
I sit here, staring at her for a moment too long, as she clears her throat to get my attention.
“Umm, I guess you have an advantage over me, because I have no idea what you are talking about.”
“Well, haven’t you heard? Kenna is actually KJ Houde, the female racer from Canada? And in two weeks, she’s going to try to be the first female racer, in history, to make the main at a Supercross. It’s all here in the article that Honda put out this morning,” she says, handing me the magazine.
Sitting here completely still for a moment, while I stare at the picture of Kenna standing there in a pair of cutoffs, a bikini top, and motocross boots. Her face isn’t showing, her back is to the camera, but I’d know that ass anywhere, it’s one I was up against just hours ago. What the fuck…this can’t be true.
“This interview is over.” Ripping the microphone from my jersey, I walk away with the magazine still in my hands, throwing it on the table as I make my way to the steps to the trailer.
Slamming open the sliders, they hit so hard they bounce back as soon as I walk through them. This can’t be happening. Why the fuck hasn’t she said anything? Did she want me to look like a stupid fuck on camera? She had to know they were going to release an article about her. Do I care she races…no…well, at least I don’t think I do, but honestly I just can’t think right now. I feel like I’ve been duped…betrayed.
I stay upstairs until my mechanic yells up that I have five minutes before I need to be down and ready to go for the heat race. I need to win it, and get the hell off the track, because right now my mind is not in a good place. Getting through the heat is going to be hard, but the main will be almost impossible. Twenty laps of concentration might be the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
My mechanic comes all the way inside, walking up the stairs, and I’m still trying to wrap my mind around what just happened. Stopping me in my tracks, we stand face to face, not letting me walk around him.
“Get your head on, Ryan,” he says sternly.
“I know,” I respond with irritation in my voice.
“You can’t go on the track if your mind’s on something else. You’ll crash and get hurt.”
“I know, I know.”
“Well, then you decide…do you race or do you stay in here pacing all night.”
I don’t hesitate, “I fucking came to race and that’s what I’m going to do.”
“That’s what I was hoping to hear.”
He rode on the back of my bike, all the way to start line before hopping off. While my mechanic took his time double checking everything, I focused on the track that was laid out in front of me. I clear my mind of anyone and anything. The only voice I hear is my dad’s telling me to ride safe, ride smart, and to keep it on two wheels, just like he used to when I was fifteen and racing against Cooper.
After the first corner I’m in front, and the heat is mine to win or so I think. I go down over a small double and I’m pissed off. I cross the line in fourth, which still means I go straight to the main, but it’s not where I want to be.
I go back to the trailer and my manager tells me that Kenna stopped by. I just keep walking, I don’t care, nor do I want to think about it anymore. I have the main ahead of me; right now that is my number one priority.
The autograph session just ended. I decide I’m going to head in to watch my heat race, to see where I can gain some time on the track; hopefully this will help keep my focus. I place one foot on the step and I hear my name from behind me. It’s coming from the same voice that was calling out my name last night.
“Not now, Kenna.” I continue making my way in the trailer as she calls out to me again.
“Kenna, I will only say this once.” I turn looking directly at her, “NOT now.” The stern tone in my voice comes out loud and clear, as I see the horrific look in her eyes. I don’t know what I’m feeling right now. I want to tell her we’ll talk later but I say nothing at all.
Kenna
As I pack for the race ahead of me, I realize it’s been almost a full week since I last spoke to or saw Ryan, and I’m feeling lost. After he walked away from me at last week’s race, I turned to head out from under his tent and saw my picture in the Racer X Magazine lying on the table. My heart immediately sank. I knew by the headline, “Will KJ Houde be the first female racer to make it to the main…find out next week in Texas,” that he had found out before I had a chance to tell him.
He hasn’t ans
wered any of my texts or the voice messages I’ve left him. I wish he’d just let me explain. I know that Ansley has told Coop about it. He says he understands why I didn’t say anything, but he also sees why Ryan’s pissed. So, for me, all I can do is focus on what Honda is expecting me to bring to this weekend’s race.
Tonight, I vow not to go to bed crying, so I grab a good book and climb under the covers early. I just want to get lost in a world, other than my own, because let’s face it, right now my world sucks.
Maddie’s out with Justin tonight, and I’m left alone with my own thoughts. Grrr, this book isn’t helping, wanting and needing to talk to Ryan is all I can think of. I jump as my phone makes a doorbell sound, notifying me of a text.
Ansley: How are you?
Ugh it’s Ansley…oh that sounds bad, but I was really hoping to look at my phone and see Ryan’s name across it.
Me: Hey there. I’m doing ok. How are you guys?
Ansley: We’re good, just wondering how training was this week? Are you ready to kick some ass this weekend?
Me: Riding this week went great. I’m just hoping not to make a fool of myself.
Ansley: Hey, no talking like that. You’ll do great.
Me: I hope so. Have you talked to Ryan?
Ansley: I did for a bit the other night, but he said he didn’t want to discuss anything with me right now.
Me: Ansley, I just need to explain everything to him.
Ansley: I know, girl. Give him some time. Ryan’s always been reasonable, so let him just sort things out.
Me: I’m kinda lost without him. I guess I really didn’t know just how much he meant to me. I mean, I knew I cared for him, but my heart is actually aching.
Ansley: Aww, I know, Ken. But I believe that you two will figure this all out and find your way back to each other.