by Amy Reece
I was at a point where I couldn’t let go of Megan’s hair, so I leaned back into his warmth and said, “I will punish you for this.” He laughed silently; I could feel the vibrations against my body. “I know. You can take me to Veronica’s party Friday after the game.”
“Oh, God, no—not a party!” He flopped back on the couch. “That’s cruel and unusual punishment. Can’t you pull my fingernails out or something?” He sat back up and hugged me again. “Why don’t we go to your house and watch movies?”
“I would love that,” I sighed, breathing in his spicy scent. I could imagine cuddling on the couch with him. Maybe more than cuddling, if we’re being totally honest here. “But I need to go to this wretched party for a little while, and I did warn you that I wouldn’t be going to any of them on my own. That’s too much to ask.” I turned my head into his delicious smelling neck. “We don’t have to stay very long; only long enough for me to get in good with Veronica. I wish I could like her, but she drives me crazy.”
Way too soon he unfolded himself from behind me and returned to his seat on the floor. “Fine. I can do maybe fifteen minutes at a stupid party.”
***
Thursday morning I woke up early enough to fuss with my hair and makeup as required by the cheerleading Nazis. I never wear very much makeup, but there were even rules about that! Acceptable amounts and colors were outlined in our cheer contracts. As I put on blush, sparkly eye shadow, and lip-gloss, I thought about how I was not cut out for all this über-girly crap. I had been dressing better lately, thanks to Tara’s tutelage, but this was over the top. We were told to wear our cheerleading warm ups to school and change into our skirts and shells right before the assembly. I fastened the puffy red bow around my super-high ponytail. Checking myself a last time in the mirror, I rolled my eyes and went downstairs to meet Tara.
“You look like Bring It On exploded all over you,” she said after giving me a once over.
“One more comment from you and I’ll smother you with my pom-poms, I swear to God, Tara! Let’s not forget whose idea this was.” She laughed. “I should have made you join cheerleading with me. Maybe there’s still time,” I threatened.
“Hell no. I have to devote myself to my oboe. I have no time for shaking pom-poms.”
I walked into fourth period physics and noticed Jack sitting at our table, texting on his phone and looking irritated. I walked up behind him and touched him on the shoulder. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
He looked up and smiled, the irritated look clearing away, when he saw it was me. “Aww. Where’s the short skirt?”
“Don’t be a pig,” I said as I handed him a set of calipers. “We’re not allowed to wear them during classes. Apparently all that bare leg would turn all these high school boys into slavering beasts. I’ll change before the assembly.”
“As a member of the slavering beasts, I get it. But I’ll be sure to get to the gym early and get a good seat with an unobstructed view. “
I mouthed “pig” at him. He gave a wolfish grin.
We were on a special schedule for the pep assembly, which was right after 4th period, right before lunch. When I left early to change into my uniform, Jack gave me a wink and a lascivious grin. I wish, I thought. Too bad he doesn’t put his money where his mouth is. He’d find me a completely willing participant. Sigh. All this flirting, hugging, and almost-but-not-quite kissing was starting to get on my nerves. Don’t get me wrong, I loved it, but I wondered where we really stood in our relationship. I was ready to dive in, but he was still holding back, keeping it mostly light, friendly, and on the surface.
The cheerleaders were warming up when they started allowing the rest of the students into the main gym. The basketball team was also warming up, shooting a few practice throws, although I have no idea why since this was simply a pep rally. They were probably showing off. I couldn’t help overhearing some of the girls talking and giggling about the boys on the team, several of who were every bit as muscular as the football players I had noticed a couple weeks ago. One of the girls was cracking a joke about a “big man with a really little man” that I didn’t understand. Judging from the way the other girls laughed, it was a crude joke. I felt really young and naïve at that moment. Maybe I would ask Tara or Jack about it later. I spotted them, sitting together with Travis about halfway up the bleachers. I saw Tara point and then Jack spot me. His jaw dropped in a flattering way when he saw me—the skirts are really short, but have these things called bloomers that cover our underwear—and he put his fingers in his mouth and let out a shrill whistle. Veronica, who was stretching beside me, noticed and said, “So are you guys together, or what?”
“Or what,” I sighed and continued stretching.
“He’s hot,” another cheerleader named Lina inserted herself into our conversation. “He’s got that whole bad boy thing going on. If you don’t want him, I may jump on that.”
My eyes narrowed into slits as I looked at her. “He’s taken.” Lina and Veronica snickered.
“Fine,” said Lina. “You might want to make sure to stake your claim, though, or I’m going to consider him fair game.” She sauntered away.
“Bitch,” I muttered.
“Bitch who’s after your man,” Veronica added.
Perfect. All I needed was competition for Jack. Great.
We did some lame cheers to get the crowd excited and then did a dance routine to ‘Move, Shake, Drop’—a clean version so the administration would not have kittens—by Pitbull. The climax of the routine came when I was standing straight up on Devonne’s hands and he threw me up in the air and I came twirling down sideways to land in his arms. It looks pretty spectacular, but is actually a pretty easy stunt. Devonne’s really strong and is able to throw me pretty high, and I tuck everything in on the way down so I spin really fast—thanks for the physics tip, Mr. Chiszowski. He then kind of throws me out of his arms and I do a series a backflips into drop splits. Hey, I did say I was a decent gymnast. Seriously, Jack doesn’t know what he’s missing. Kidding, jeez. I’m not that kind of girl. At least I don’t think I am.
Jack and Tara were waiting for me after the assembly. “So, how’d I do?” I asked anxiously. They were the only ones I cared about impressing.
“You were great, Ally!” Tara gushed. “I’m glad you’re finally putting all your years in gymnastics to good use.” She hugged me.
“Well?” I stood in front of Jack, who had his arms crossed and looked a bit moody.
“You were really good,” he said reluctantly. “But my heart about stopped when you were flipping around in the air. You should have warned me.” He uncrossed his arms. “And why does that guy have to have his hands all over your ass? I’m not loving that part. It seems a bit intrusive and personal. Is that why you got into cheerleading, so you could have guys put their hands all over you in public?”
Wait, what? He was supposed to be proud. I had no words. What a jerk! Why would he say something so mean? I was so mad I could only stare at him, fuming, trying not to let him see the tears that were trying to escape. He stared right back. I was seriously contemplating punching him in the face when Tara stepped in.
“Okay, lover boy. Why don’t we go to the cafeteria?” Tara grabbed Jack’s arm and began pulling him away. “Ally, go get changed and meet us there. Maybe you both will have cooled off by then.”
I turned without a word and stomped off. How could he? I never even wanted to do this stupid cheerleading! He had been all encouragement up until now, but then he goes and has a complete cow the first time he sees me actually cheer! Ugh! I expected a little more support from him! I angrily ripped my skirt off and put my warm-ups back on. I was trying to keep the angry tears from overflowing, but it was a losing battle.
“Hey,” it was Veronica. “You’re ruining your eye makeup. Here…” She approached me and began dabbing at my eyes. “Stop crying. He’s not worth it. Men are pigs. Accept it. Don’t let him see that he made you cry. There.” She stepped back to chec
k her repair work. “You look great.” She gave me a brief hug. “You also did great out there. You’re the best flyer we’ve ever had. I never even thought you’d be interested in cheerleading. Who knew?” Who knew, indeed? “You are coming to my party tomorrow night, aren’t you? Bring your boyfriend, if you’ve forgiven him by then.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” I objected, but she was already gone, leaving a whiff of perfume behind her. I shrugged and gathered up my cheer bag and headed to lunch. I had no intention of going anywhere with Jack Ruiz. You don’t treat me like that! I would show him a thing or two.
Jack was waiting for me in the hallway, leaning against the wall outside the cafeteria. I paused when I saw him, but then squared my shoulders and prepared to walk right past him without a word. He reached his long arm out and gently grabbed my hand. “Ally, please. Can we talk?”
I pulled my hand roughly out of his and said, “Fine. Talk.”
He sighed, pushed himself off the wall, and took both my hands in his. I didn’t pull mine away this time, but I refused to meet his eyes. “Ally, I’m sorry. I was a jerk. Tara pretty much let me know I was acting like an asshole.”
“What did she say?” I asked, still not looking at him.
“She said ‘Jack, you’re acting like an asshole.’” Tara really never minces words. “Look, Ally, I’m so sorry. I saw you looking so amazing and sexy in that tiny skirt and then that guy was touching you in places that made me see red. I went a little bit crazy.”
“Jack,” I said, pulling my hands away from him in frustration. “We’re just friends, remember? You have no right to be so insanely jealous.” Inside, I was somewhat flattered that it was actually jealousy that caused him to act like such a jerk, but still!
“Ally, you know we’re more than that!”
“No, Jack! I don’t know that! How could I know that?” I cried.
We both stared at each other, chests heaving. Then, suddenly, I was sick of it all: sick of the guessing, the flirting, the backing off. I could see the hurt in his eyes and wondered if there wasn’t more to this than he was telling me. This stupid fight wasn’t important. It was really only my pride that was smarting. Props to Jane Austen for that little life lesson. Jack was what was important right now. I wanted more than friendship, but would take him on his terms for however long it took. I got one of my feelings that there was indeed more to this than what was on the surface, so I stepped forward, put my arms around him, and buried my head in his hard chest. I heard him mutter ‘shit’ very softly before his arms came around me and held me tight.
“Jack, what is it? It’s not only this, is it? Is something wrong?”
“Yeah,” he sighed against my hair. “I got a call this morning. My probation hearing has been moved up. It’s this afternoon. I guess I’m just freaking out. I was doing fine, holding it together, until I saw that guy’s hands all over you. I’m sorry.”
“I want to come with you,” I stated as I pulled back to look at him, instantly putting our fight aside.
“No. Absolutely not. I don’t want you to have to hear all that crap about me, the stuff I did. No way. I’ll call you when it’s over.” He set me away from him and turned away from me. “Let’s go eat lunch, please?”
“Fine. I’ll take the bus and meet you there. I’m sure Trina will tell me where to go.”
He turned and exclaimed, “Goddammit, Ally! You are the most stubborn person I have ever met!” I stared at him with my arms crossed, my eyebrows raised, waiting. “I want to keep you separate from that part of my life,” he tried again. Still I waited. “Fine,” he sighed. “You win. Wait for me after school. I have to change clothes. You can ride with me. Maybe you’ll finally realize why we shouldn’t be together.”
I smiled and stepped back into his arms. “I seriously doubt it, Jack.”
“At least tell me that guy who was fondling you is gay,” he said into my hair.
“Nope. 100% heterosexual. He asked me out.” I couldn’t resist.
Jack didn’t let go; in fact, he held me tighter. “And what did you say?”
“I said I couldn’t possibly,” I paused. “At this time.”
Jack said a very bad word.
“See you after school.” I gave him a last squeeze. And I walked away.
***
I waited for Jack outside the men’s room after school. He walked out buttoning his dark suit jacket and my jaw must have dropped visibly.
“What?” he asked. “Do I look all right?”
“You look wonderful, Jack.” He looked amazing, handsome, and about 25 years old. I stepped forward to straighten his collar.
He stilled my hands on his lapels. “I’m glad you’re coming. I’m sorry about earlier. I’m really nervous. I hope this is my last hearing.”
“Jack, you’re 18. Can they really keep you on probation any longer?”
“My probation officer said that the judge could grant a six month extension if the court feels I haven’t met the restrictions of my probation. He hasn’t been real happy with me lately, so he may testify that I need a longer term. If the judge thinks I’m in danger of being a habitual offender, he could keep me on probation until I’m 21. God, Ally. I want to be done with all this.”
“You will be. Just like you knew I’d make the cheerleading squad, I know for a fact that you’ll be a free man tonight.” I finished straightening his collar.
“Ally,” he held my face between his hands. “You’re going to hear all the charges that were laid against me. Please don’t judge me. I’ve changed a lot since then.” In spite of the grown-up suit, he looked so vulnerable in that moment. I’m pretty sure I tumbled the rest of the way in love with him right then.
“Never,” I said and reached up on my toes to give him a soft, brief kiss on his lips.
He pulled me close and set his forehead against mine. “Thank you. You have no idea what this means.”
The drive downtown to the courthouse on 2nd and Lomas was nearly silent. He turned the radio on to a classics station and said nothing, his hands gripping the steering wheel tightly. When we got to the courthouse, Manny and Jack’s cousin, Shelly, were both there, as well as a bunch of other relatives I hadn’t met. Jack introduced me to his grandparents and so many cousins, aunts, and uncles I knew I’d never remember them all.
“Manny,” said Jack, looking worriedly around. “You didn’t let Megan come, did you?”
“Don’t worry, mijo. She’s at home with your aunt. Trina is praying for you.”
Jack relaxed slightly. “Good. She shouldn’t be here.” Through all the various introductions, Jack had kept a firm hold on my hand, our fingers intertwined, as if I were his lifeline. My heart was breaking for him. If the judge didn’t end his probation I would probably launch myself at him and start pummeling. Well, then Jack and I could be on probation together, at least.
We entered the courtroom and I went to sit by Manny and Shelly, while Jack sat up front with his lawyer. The judge started by stating that this was a post-disposition hearing for Jackson Iván Ruiz. He detailed the delinquency charges against Jack, the most serious of which was distribution of a controlled substance. I cringed to hear all the charges, not because they disgusted me or anything, but because I could feel Jack shrinking in his chair with every separate charge. I knew that part of Jack’s life was in the past, left behind as he learned to deal with his grief over losing his mother, and in every practical way, his father. He had been through so much and had emerged with a strong, steady character.
I didn’t follow everything that was said, as so much of it was legal jargon. Jack’s lawyer spoke for him, telling the judge that he had met all the requirements of his probation, had become an outstanding student both in high school and community college, was working successfully in his uncle’s auto body shop, and had tested negative on every random drug test in the last two years. There were no school discipline reports in his file since moving to Albuquerque. He also said that Jack had completed court
mandated drug and alcohol counseling and had also completed his mandatory community service. He had the support of a large and loving family. I held my breath when his probation officer spoke, but he simply reiterated what the lawyer had said: Jack had met all the requirements of his probation.
I watched Jack during the entire speech. His jaw was surely going to ache with how tight he was holding it. Finally, the judge asked Jack to stand. Shelly reached over and grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly.
“Mr. Ruiz, I have reviewed all of your probation reports and official school records. It is the judgment of this court that, having reached the age of 18 and having successfully completed the conditions of your probation and rehabilitation, you are now to be considered free and clear of the NM State Juvenile Justice system.” He looked sternly over the top his reading glasses at Jack. “Son, you’ve been given a second chance. Don’t blow it. Next time you will be charged as an adult. You may file a petition to have your juvenile record sealed. Court is adjourned.” He rapped his gavel softly and got up to leave.
I watched Jack sink down in his chair and put his head in his hands. It completely floored me to see a tear slip down his cheek. He wiped it away quickly and stood to shake his lawyer’s hand. Then he turned toward me. I was in his arms in seconds, not caring who was watching or who was in my way. He held me as we rocked gently. “It’s over,” was all he said. I could only nod. We realized we couldn’t stay like that, not with his family waiting. “Come on,” he said and wrapped my hand tightly in his as we turned to greet his jubilant family.
Shelly gave us both a hug, her eyes streaming. “Damn contacts,” she said as she turned away to wipe her face.
“Jack.” Manny approached with a cellphone outstretched. “Trina wants to talk to you.”