by Ann Patty
Under the dim bed lamp light in her rented room, Cairn spent hours studying her road map. There was one all-too-enticing attraction that perked her interest. Namely Yellowstone National Park. It was way to the north of her direct route. Visiting time needed to be figured in. Yet, it was doable. And so, another few days would be added to Cairn's travel itinerary. Since she was a kid whenever Cairn heard the mention of 'Yellowstone Park' she had an urge to go see it. The park was calling her. So in the option of fun and to be an ultimate explorer Cairn spent the next days traveling to and from Yellowstone Park, and being a tourist inside its boundaries.
Call of the Wild
After a trip to the visitors’ center and buying tourist books, Cairn was loaded with trips and trails to investigate within the park. Never was Cairn so in awe of what nature provided. Especially as she stood in front of Old Faithful spouting off for the millionth time. When it was done, Cairn tingled as if her body for the first time was connecting to something much larger and outside of herself. She thought it might be akin to some sort of spirit experience, but she did not know. She had no reference to go by. Within that minute her phone rang.
“So how's the cowboy?” Kelly asked with a prod.
“Huh?” Cairn took a minute to recompose and reenter the world that she left off. Then she said, “Um, I'm actually standing here in Yellowstone National Park. And you want to know where I am exactly? In front of Old Faithful! I just saw it blow its top. Incredible Kelly. This is as close to a religious experience that I've had.”
“What? Really? No cowboy, only spouting steamy water?” Kelly laughed hysterically. She could not fathom Cairn's sense of direct. “So tell me more Cairn.”
Cairn relaxed and simply said, “There is really nothing to tell. I just was called to do this side trip and so here I am. It's pretty awesome Kelly. This land and what nature gives back. I believe the concrete of the city has blocked something fundamental in me, like my roots to our indigenous past. The quality of life here is something to breath in. Kelly, I now see what you see in all those nature books you read, and your weekend jaunts in the mountains. When I return I'd like to try doing days hikes with you, if that would be okay?”
“Geez Cairn, this trip has already been an opening to your soul. That is so terrific and of course it would be wonderful having you hike with me. I'd love it!” Kelly said.
“Kelly, I'll call you later. My cowboy is calling in... probably wondering where I am. So I got to get this call. Bye my dear friend,” Cairn then switched the calls and said, “Hi, cowboy Cliff. How's it going today?”
“Well, for one it is nice to hear your voice. And for two, where the hell are you? I thought you'd be driving up my road by now,” Cliff asked with an edge to his voice.
“I'm actually, uhhhh, in Yellowstone Park,” said Cairn, pleased as punch with her independent streak.
“Ahhh shit, you are where?” Cliff said in a perturbed voice. “I don't know what to say. I'm disappointed. I thought you were coming to see me. Are you?”
“Of course I am coming to see you. You are my number one attraction, Cliff. It's just that I've never been on a road trip. I mean never, ever. And Yellowstone Park has always been on my bucket list. And so here I am. It'll only be another day or two. Promise no more side trips,” Cairn reasoned and almost pleaded for mercy.
Cliff was silent for a bit, and then stated, “OK, I guess I get that. Enjoy your trip. Take more time if you need to. Sounds like you are having a bit of freedom from your boxed in life, so with my blessings, have fun.”
Cairn breathed a sigh of relief, “Cliff, you are the best. Really. I am not so sure many guys would put up with me. I will admit sometimes I am random.”
“Yeah, well, don't push a good thing. I do have my boundaries too,” Cliff spoke in a lighter tone. “Cairn, just remember what I told you when you come. I will be on the range until late, so just go to the cafe to find me. My cell phone might even be off. Anyway, wanted to touch base with you. I gotta git going. Bye babe.”
“Okay, bye... oh, Cliff,” Cairn spoke.
“Yeah?”
“I think I could fall for you,” Cairn said.
“Ya? Huh. Now there's a thought worth exploring,” Cliff laughed, then hung up.
Cairn felt good inside. She had not totally blown Cliff off out of selfish intention. Admittedly, Cairn had a knack for sales that she used when acquiring new friendships. She was charismatic amid manipulative. The lord only knows how self-centered Cairn could be at times. She tried with the best of intentions to be more giving and less selfish, but the truth was Cairn was self-serving. She knew it and most of her friends knew it. She always marveled how Kelly was so forgiving of her slights. Kelly had endless patience to put up with her tardiness, forgetfulness, and moments of self-serving indulgence. Cairn, regarded and loved Kelly as a sister—a family member that was eternally bound by devotion to her. Kelly knew Cairns faults, but saw past her flaws and took no offense. Cairn made no excuse for who she was, and was not too likely to change for anyone. Cairn accepted her indulgences for what they were, made no fuss, and then moved on.
For two days, Cairn wandered around the park. She followed in the footsteps of all the highlights offered. She dared to wander outside the park into more remote areas. Cairn was thankful that her all-wheel drive Outback was stealthy enough to handle any road condition. Sometimes, Cairn would pull over and sit in a quiet spot, pull out her favorite read, the Wall Street Journal and study it cover to cover. She was never too far from her job calling. Once, Cairn looked up to see a mother bear and her twin cubs cross in a pasture downwind from her. Frozen still holding her paper, Cairn just stared in awe. Here she was really out in the wild. She reasoned to keep still as the group would surely spot her if she moved. This was a good choice as they moved on their way as quickly as they arrived.
Cairn began to connect to the earth. This was something that was foreign to her. For the minimal time Cairn spent in the park, she began to see another world that seemed more real than the one she left a week earlier. The vibrant wild flowers, the talking, babbling brooks, the springs of hot, blue, surreal waters, the abundant wildlife, all of these gestures of nature touched Cairn. She even spent her nights in the lodge. Typically booked up, but a canceled reservation made way for a vacant room for her. Sleeping in this well preserved creaky lodge provided another avenue for the nature nurturing that Cairn was beginning to crave.
When Cairn had had her fill, when she could hear in her mind Cliff's urgent voice, and her inner clock alarm rang 'enough', Cairn packed her wagon up, looked around once last time, and left. South she traveled in a state of calm and bliss. She had just left something much larger than herself, but gained a part of herself back that she didn't know she lost. She smiled thinking to herself; even selfish people are entitled to having a soul.
Her GPS indicated there were about nine hours of travel to meet her destination. Should she go for it today? No. Plus Cairn did not want to get to a place in the middle of nowhere in the dark. As she drove south, the Tetons Mountains loomed impressively magnificent. Yes, this was another gem to explore and experience just for a bit. Time was a factor now. Somewhere outside of the Tetons heading west Cairn had an urge to pull over and stretch her legs.
Chief Insights
The stretch of road she was on was a side street of sorts. It looked to be the old way across the country. It was still a working and viable byway and used regularly. There were some spurs off this road. Cairn took a decent gravel right of way to the end where it stopped at a river. This country was vast, rugged, and fulfilling to one's senses. Cairn left her car and walked down stream. She crouched down, then bent over and splashed some river water on her face. It felt wonderfully fresh. When she balanced back to a crouching position she looked to her left and saw a red robe with white and black stripe flowing next to her. It startled her, as she never saw anyone walking up the river near her location. The river-bank had solely been hers all alone. Cairn took her hands
to the dirt and pushed off putting herself upright.
The robe was wrapped around an old man. He was deeply tanned and his skin well weathered with wrinkles and creases and folds, giving him his own character. Deep set coal eyes looked out from under his collapsing eyelids. His hair was shoulder length, silver white, with one thick strand braided with brown leather and a yellow shoe-lace intertwined. A small feather adorned the end. His red robe was worn proudly. It draped over his whole torso with the corners landing at his sandal wearing feet. If he bore a staff, Cairn thought he would be the equivalent to the movie scene, where Moses parted the Red Sea just with his charisma alone. Well, this man, no taller than five-foot two and bearing a feather light frame held a remarkable presence. Holy was the word that came to Cairn's mind.
As Cairn rose to her feet, the old sage looked at her, bowed his head and smiled in acknowledgment. Cairn did not know exactly what to say except, “Hi how are you? Lovely day isn't it?” Somehow, although it broke the ice, Cairn felt these words were highly inadequate.
“Yes. Yes it is a nice day. One of those days where magic can happen,” the old man said thoughtfully. He looked Cairn over and smiled then spoke, “You are not from here, I know this. Are you lost?”
Cairn clarified the strangers misgivings and said, “Oh no. I'm just exploring on my way west and thought I'd stop.”
“I see,” The old man said, nodding once again.
“You know I don't want to be rude, but I didn't see anyone when I walked to this spot. Where did you come from?” Cairn asked, wondering if she was out of line in asking.
“Oh I frequent this river bank often. At my age, I've learned to walk softly. No impact.” The old robe-wearing man stated. He was not naked beneath the cloth as he wore a flannel, blue and white plaid shirt and an equally well-worn pair of jeans. “Miss, if you don't mind me prying, but I sense you have left some thing behind as you seek for something more. You are starting to find it—in yourself. My guides reveal that you are to seek more, for you shall be forever indebted to your search.”
Cairn listened carefully. There are times in a person's life when certain words ring true. This was one of those times. The messenger, this time was a wise old sage, who offered Cairn wisdom that she was just beginning to understand and appreciate. After a time Cairn said, “Thank you. It is true; a part of me is shifting. Are you a clairvoyant?”
The small man of big stature grinned and laughed softly. He said, “Oh I've been called many things. Clairvoyant is good, too,” he smiled ear to ear not hiding his amusement. “I can continue if you'd like.”
Cairn liked this person, wherever he came from. On a deeper level, she even trusted him. More so, she was curious. Everyone likes to know and hear what others say about them. Cairn was no different; especially since being a bit self-indulgent there was an urge to learn more about herself. So when Cairn looked directly into the wise man's eyes and nodded a big affirmative “Yes,” he took the lead.
The sage sat back on a large well-placed sitting rock. With an outstretched arm and hand pointing the native showed Cairn which rock to sit on, too. Cairn did not recollect any large rocks nearby and here they sat next to the river like this was an ongoing daily tea party. The wise man gazed into the river as if searching for answers, or questions. Cairn stayed silent. She intuitively knew that remaining quiet would unearth new value for her life.
“Change for you is inevitable. Your inner landscape, your soul journey is being challenged. Do not let it frighten you. This is good growth, and timely. There is a tendency when being confronted with the new, to pull back and hold to old ideals. This is human and it is natural. And, yes, it is safe, but only in your mind this perception exists. Holding on to the old does not serve you, or anybody, well. It's good to clean your closet out so you can bring new things in that serve you much better. Clearing out antiquated beliefs allows much better energy flow and then better thoughts,” the wise old sage stopped talking, folded his arms across his chest, leaned back a tad and closed his eyes as if to re-balance. Then he continued, “You have a discomfort with animals. They are not here to hurt you. Quite the contrary. Animals are cloaked spirit guides. If you listen, they can teach you more about yourself than any human interaction will. Do not look for the large expressive bouts of vocal tale bearing. No, animals are subtle communicators. They mirror your inner self. It is true all animals communicate differently. This is a good thing because everyone resonates with different animals. Some like dogs, some cats, others horses, some like all animals. Each animal is like a human. Each is unique and communicates in their own way. Have you Cairn, ever liked a particular type of animal?” The old man asked.
Cairn was deep into thought for what the sage just offered. She also, didn't think she offered her name to him, but no matter. Did she ever have an animal in her life path? Then she remembered and said, “I've never owned an animal, but sometimes stray cats befriend me. They come to my door looking for food and so I feed them. I had one stay over for about four weeks once. Then one day it disappeared. I was rather despondent. But I chalked it up to this cat being transient. Like people we need to move on.”
“That is good. That cat and the others who have crossed your path have helped you understand a part of yourself you might not get in touch with otherwise,” the wisdom this old sage offered sucked Cairn right in. She was hooked. The sage continued to talk, “You know we are all, in essence, energy vibration. All of us, everything, including animals. Do you know how some folks seem to talk so well with their animals; can get their animals to perform incredible feats? It is simple. Since we are all vibration, all one has to do it get on the same frequency as their pet. And voila you can have a whole new world of conversation. Really it’s more like tuning your intuition to the same channel where someone else lives; it is understood by using body language and connecting to your soul source. Nothing really more, but people muddle the simplest things up and then a mess begins,” the sage nodded, and closed his eyes once again.
Cairn just landed an encyclopedia full and was swimming in questions yet had none. She stated to herself in an overwhelming urge to absorb all that she heard.
“Vibration,” Cairn stated not expecting an answer. “Geez, I never gave animals any credit for nothing. Oh my, I'm sorry mother earth I did not know. Yes, this all makes sense.”
The sage smiled. His student was a fast learner. More than that she was receptive to what was offered. The man left Cairn with a few more parting thoughts when he said, “You are embarking on new territory. This is an opportunity to gain another perspective. Everything you interact with is a chance encounter for you to learn. Seize it. And last, watch out for the snake with the rock. It carries the seed to renewal.” With that the sage got up, leaned over squeezed Cairn's shoulder and walked on down the riverbank.
Cairn enamored, was immersed in thought as the old native left. It was like he had x-ray vision to see inside her. It did not offend her, for she trusted him. Everything he said was true. Everything. Except she did not understand the bit about a snake with a rock and renewal. Well it was time to go. Cairn stood up and walked down the riverbank in the opposite direction. She remembered that she did not bide the old sage a proper thank you. Cairn turned around to go back and he was gone, as in disappeared. This was impossible because he was just there and he did not walk at all fast and the beach was expansive. One would have to run pretty fast to get out of sight. Cairn stood for five minutes trying figure out where her friend had gone. It was baffling. Deciding to go to town and get something to eat, Cairn headed back to her car.
Divine Intervention
Driving back through the town, its population could not be more than a thousand. The buildings were dated, mostly done in red brick and lined the one and only street there was. The town survived because of the freeway traffic flow, which kept it alive. And, the good fishing from the river. Cairn found an old time cafe, went in and sat in a booth. Her head was still swimming from all the information the man h
ad instilled in her. A waitress came and gave Cairn a menu. She didn't need one and told the waitress that she wanted a large vanilla shake, a cheeseburger, and fries. The waitress nodded and left.
Cairn looked around the small cafe. There were old town posters everywhere. There were so many from different years, but all seemed to declare the history of the town and its residences. Her mind hurt but she could not turn it off, so she stared blindly at the posters on the walls and ceiling. She bent her head back for no reason other than to stretch her neck muscles and stared at the ceiling. More posters adorned every inch of space. It was then that one poster caught Cairn's full attention.