Every Last Kiss, Final Copy, June 30, 2011

by Courtney Cole

  I swirled the last mouthful of dark red shedeh around in the bottom of the golden chalice before swallowing it, enjoying the rich wine. As Macy, I had not even sipped an alcoholic beverage yet. I never felt the need, even though Jenn was always sneaking gin from her dad’s liquor cabinet for weekend parties. And gin smells disgusting so I’ve never even been tempted.

  Tonight, I found the wine to be… okay. Sort of bitter, actually, and not something I would write home about although I did feel my cheeks flushing nicely as I drank it. I imagined that the color was becoming.

  There was a soft knock at Cleopatra’s doors and we rose to greet Iras. Tall, slender and Nubian, she glided into the room, her dark skin glistening in the muted light of the candles. She had not been feeling well this week and had been recovering in her chambers, not wanting to expose the queen to illness.

  Dressed in a simple cotton frock, she looked much better than the last time I had seen her….which was when we committed suicide with Cleopatra. And to be honest, death doesn’t become anyone. I realized that my two thousand year old memories had not done her justice. She was beautiful as her deep brown eyes flashed in the light. She knelt in front of Cleopatra, her dark skin gleaming.

  “My queen,” she murmured, keeping her eyes to the floor. Unlike me, she was never insolent. She was wonderfully calm and perfectly deferent, in all things. I honestly don’t know how she did it.

  But then again, she had not been raised with Cleopatra as I had. Cleopatra and I had known each other since we were girls.

  “Iras, please stand, love. I’ve told you that you do not need to kneel when we are alone,” Cleopatra admonished lightly. “I hope you are feeling better. There is a task that we need you to perform- it is of a delicate nature. I can trust no one but you.”

  Iras nodded solemnly as she rose from the floor, her white shift fluttering in the night breeze. Her deep, mahogany skin appeared even darker against the light fabric. She was surrounded by the thick scent of amber. It suited her.

  “What is it you require of me, my queen?”

  Her low voice was as smooth as velvet. As I stared at her in fascination, everything about her reminded me of warm, melted dark chocolate.

  “I require that you steal quietly into the Serapis temple and locate the priest Annen. I believe that he is hiding from Antony and General Hasani. I am only guessing, of course, but I think that he will be hiding himself in the labyrinth beneath the temple in which he serves.”

  When Cleopatra mentioned Hasani’s name, Iras’ gaze flickered briefly to me, her dark eyes curious, before returning to the queen as Cleopatra continued. It was common knowledge that Hasani and I had been together since we were teenagers. If it hadn’t been for my position with the queen, we would have married long ago.

  “You must attempt to find him before Antony and Hasani do. We are afraid that he won’t come out if they are there and he might possess knowledge that I need. Upon finding Annen, give him the message that I need to speak with him. That it is vitally important. Can you do this for me, Iras?” Cleopatra’s face was perfectly calm and smooth- no one but me would have known that internally, she was a mess.

  Iras nodded smoothly. “Of course, your highness. I will leave right now.”

  She quickly disappeared into the corridors as quietly as she had come in, leaving Cleopatra and I to stare at each other wordlessly.

  “I hope she finds him,” I finally said, walking to the open balcony doors.

  I was at a loss to say anything else. The air smelled delicious as the night jasmine released the scent from their blooms into the breeze and I inhaled deeply as I watched the pathways below the palace for signs of Hasani and Antony.

  “So do I,” Cleopatra answered as she stripped off her wig and began brushing her long brown hair. Seated at her vanity, she curled her slender legs around the elegant padded stool that she was sitting upon.

  Feeling restless, I paced back inside and crossed the room to her. I dipped a cloth into a basin of water and wiped away her make-up, leaving her face shiny and clean. Freshly combed, her long hair fell softly onto her shoulders and spilled down her back and she looked no older than a teenager.

  “You are never more beautiful than when you allow your natural beauty to show, my love.”

  Cleopatra and I both turned in surprise at Marc Antony’s voice. His large body filled the doorway of her bedchamber as he observed the queen’s night-time beauty rituals with interest.

  “But then, I’m sure you know that.”

  He smiled tiredly at his wife and crossed the room, placing his large hands on her shoulders as he bent to kiss the top of her head.

  “We could not find the priest,” Antony muttered dejectedly as he dropped heavily into a chaise lounge next to Cleopatra. “There are hundreds of hidden passageways throughout the city. It will be very difficult to search through them all. And we’ve got the pressing Roman problem, as well. Things always seem to happen at once, do they not?”

  Cleopatra gazed at him softly, before walking to where he reclined, her hips swaying gently. She knelt in front of him and rested her head against his henna-tattooed chest.

  “It will all work out, my love. Do not trouble yourself.”

  “Cleopatra, don’t be naïve. There are things that even you cannot simply wish away.” Antony muttered morosely. Cleopatra looked up at me.

  “Charmian… I can manage for the rest of the evening. You may leave.”

  Her eyes implored me and I knew she meant that I was free to leave… to find Hasani and to leave her to deal with Antony’s dark mood. I smiled and turned to go.

  “Charmian?” Antony interrupted me. I turned back in surprise, staring at him curiously. His face was damp in the heat, causing the kohl lining his eyes to smear slightly.

  “Yes?”

  “Be careful. Until we know if there is actually a plot to kill Cleopatra, you could be in danger, as well. Do not stray too far from the palace without a guard.” His gaze searched my face, as though he was looking for something.

  Color flooded my cheeks and spread to my chest as I took deep breaths. Keep it together. He doesn’t know anything. He’s just waiting for an agreement.

  “Thank you, my lord. I always try to be cautious.”

  I nodded calmly and retreated, leaving Antony and Cleopatra alone. As I left, Cleopatra was climbing on top of him to kiss him soundly. I was sure she was trying to distract him from his worry. It was best that I not be there for that, anyway.

  As Charmian, I was quite accustomed to remaining in the room while Cleopatra and Antony were intimate- it was Egyptian custom to not leave the queen unattended. As Macy, however, that was just so embarrassing. There were some things that were just best done in private…. Such as making love with your husband.

  I quietly closed the door behind me as I left the royal chambers and leaned against the elaborately painted wall. I could feel the curious sideways stares of the guards, but I paid them no mind. The gravity of what I was going to soon lose was closing in on me and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

  I had to pretend that I knew nothing of our fate- that to the best of my knowledge, we would prevail in the battle against Octavian and we would all live happily ever after. I swallowed hard, trying to dislodge the horrid thoughts, but I couldn’t. They were there to stay.

  “Charmian?”

  I didn’t even have to look to know it was Hasani. I would know his voice anywhere.

  I opened my eyes to find him hesitantly standing two feet from me. He was visibly concerned as he watched me. His strong features instantly caused my heart to start fluttering as the flickering torch light caught every angle of his beautiful face.

  I quickly put my game face on, hiding any sadness that might betray my thoughts. I stepped toward him, allowing a wide grin to stretch across my face. It wasn’t hard to smile … I was infinitely happy to see him.

  “My love,” I murmured, reaching for him. He willingly pulled me into his strong arms an
d I buried my face against him, marveling at how his skin could be so soft, while his body was so hard.

  “Are you alright?” He asked as he held me tight.

  “I am now.” I smiled gently up at him. “Cleopatra does not require me further tonight. Shall we retire?”

  He smiled broadly and wrapped his arm around my waist as he steered me quickly down the dimly lit hall.

  “Of course, my sweet. I find that I am… exhausted and quite ready to rest.”

  His mischievous smile made me laugh, relaxing the tension I had been holding in my shoulders as he let his hand slip from the small of my back to trail suggestively across my hips.

  “Exhausted, hmm?” I asked lightly, leaning into his strong arm. “Oddly enough, you seem quite energetic to me.”

  “Energetic enough, my lady,” he countered lightly.

  We had walked into a deserted stretch of hall way and he pulled me into a small, darkened nook. He lowered his face to mine, kissing me soundly until I felt that I was going to hyper-ventilate. It should be illegal to be as sexy as he was. I broke the kiss, staring up at him wide-eyed.

  “Yes, general,” I confirmed breathlessly, “You appear to be quite energetic.”

  Satisfied, he grinned and once again took my arm. As we walked toward my bedchamber, I watched the happy smirk on his face and I had to secretly smile. The man was pleasantly arrogant.

  He opened my door for me and I entered, waiting until he passed to close the doors. I peeked down the hall first, though, and saw nothing but the glassy eye of Anubis staring down at me. Shuddering, I clicked the door closed.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Before daybreak the next morning, soft rapping on my bedchamber door woke me from a restless sleep. My eyes flew open to find Hasani sleeping soundly next to me, his face relaxed and boyish as he dreamed. In the dying light of the flickering oil lamps, I hurriedly pulled on a dressing gown to answer the door before another knock woke him. Carefully opening it just a crack, I peered into the hall.

  “My lady, our majesty wishes to see you immediately.”

  The stoic face of the guard was impassive, as though pre-dawn summons were normal. We both knew that they were not. Cleopatra would rather die than get up before day break.

  “I will get dressed and be right there. Please tell her that I will only be a moment.”

  The guard nodded curtly and disappeared silently into the darkness. I closed the door lightly behind him, lowering the bar quietly to lock it. It didn’t matter, because as I turned back around, Hasani was watching me.

  “What is it, my love?” he asked, propped on his elbows on the thick, soft mattress of my bed. Despite my effort, the quiet whispering had woken him.

  Against the crisp white bedding, his bronze skin glistened even more than usual and I couldn’t help but notice the definition of his arm. I could practically see the individual striations in the muscle. Amazing. I realized then that I hadn’t been breathing and forced myself to take a deep breath. He certainly had an effect on me, that was for sure.

  “Charmian?”

  He was looking at me strangely and I realized that I hadn’t answered his question. His bulging biceps had distracted me. I forced my gaze away from them and back to his face. Not exactly a hardship.

  “I’m not certain. Cleopatra needs me already,” I sighed as I sat on the edge of the bed next to him.

  Reaching out my hand, I brushed the long silky strands of his hair away from his face. He closed his eyes and leaned into my hand, the roughness of his morning stubble scratching my skin.

  “I wish you could stay,” he murmured huskily, staring at me with his fathomless dark eyes. I knew I could get lost in eyes like that, so I pulled away with another sigh.

  “Trust me, so do I,” I mumbled as I stood so that I could dress.

  I felt his dark gaze penetrating my back as I stripped off my clothes and hurriedly dressed in a cotton day shift. I quickly brushed my hair and twisted it into a simple bun at the nape of my neck, securing it with slender ivory pins. Bending quickly, I brushed my lips across Hasani’s brow.

  He used my off-balance stance as an opportunity to pull me down until I was lying on top of him. His hands roamed liberally over my body, tracing the henna phoenix tattooed on my back. I closed my eyes, enjoying the weight and warmth of his fingers through my thin shift.

  “You are not making it easy for me to leave, Hasani,” I sighed into his soft lips.

  “I wasn’t trying to,” he replied as he kissed the side of my neck so softly that goose bumps formed. Lord, he was cocky. And I loved that about him.

  I groaned as I pushed his hands away and stood up.

  “Trust me, I would rather stay here with you, but I need to see what the queen needs. It must be important at this hour.”

  He nodded and grudgingly released me, but I could tell from his expression that he understood. He was a general in Antony’s army, after all. He understood loyalty- it was in every strand of his molecular make-up. He was burying his head deep under a buckwheat pillow as I was slipped out the door.

  Making my way hurriedly to Cleopatra’s chamber, I wondered what the heck would be waiting for me when I arrived. The guards stationed outside of her door were nonplussed at my early appearance and seemed as calm as always. Their staid normalcy was comforting- whatever the issue was must not be too bad, but I still hurried to get to her just in case. They didn’t have all of the information that I did about our current situation... and ignorance was bliss.

  As I threw open the doors, my rushed entry was anti-climactic. Cleopatra’s chamber was completely silent as I entered it. Her bed was rumpled, but empty. The balcony doors were closed against the cool morning air, muffling the noise from the sea. I gazed around the darkened room but didn’t see anything amiss. Everything seemed just as I had left it last night. Except that Cleopatra wasn’t here.

  “Cleopatra?”

  As I called for her, I made my way around each room, lighting the castor oil sconces. She had let them burn out and there was no reason for the room to be so dark.

  “I’m here.”

  Her voice was so tiny that I barely heard it. I followed it and found her huddled on the floor next to her bed with her knees clutched to her chest. Her face was pale in the darkness, her eyes dull and tired from lack of sleep.

  “Are you alright?”

  She nodded, but I rushed to her side anyway and gave her a quick once-over. She appeared to be fine. Her hair was uncombed and she was still in her dressing gown, but I guessed that it was because she had never gone to bed.

  “Where’s Antony?” I asked as I slid down to sit next to her. She scooted over to make room on the thick carpet for me.

  “He was feeling melancholy last night and slept in his own chambers,” her voice was small and sad and I instantly felt sorry for her. She didn’t like sympathy, however, so I took pains to hide it.

  It wasn’t unusual for Antony to succumb to melancholy, in fact, it was the very reason Cleopatra had his own palatial addition built… so that he had a vast private place to surround himself with while he moped. I knew she wasn’t upset that he had chosen to sleep alone—she was only sad because of the timing. She wanted to soak in his strength so she could maintain her own.

  “Are you alright?”

  I struggled to make my voice devoid of sympathy and matter-of-fact.

  “I’m fine,” she sighed. “But I’m concerned because Iras hasn’t returned. If she wasn’t able to find Annen, she would have come back and reported that to me. But she hasn’t come back at all. I have a bad feeling, Charmian… do you think something has happened to her?”

  “Cleopatra!” I gasped. “That’s horrible- don’t even think that! What could possibly have happened? She probably returned to the palace too late and didn’t want to wake you.”

  But even before I had finished speaking, Cleopatra was already shaking her head dejectedly.

  “She didn’t come back. I had the guards check her rooms
.”

  Panic bubbled up in me, even though I tried to hide it from the queen. It wasn’t like Iras not to complete a task. She was nothing if not obedient. If she could’ve returned to the palace, she would have. I had a sick feeling that where ever she was now, she didn’t want to be there.

  Pothinus. She’s with Pothinus. Ahmose’s raspy voice appeared in my mind, out of nowhere and I startled, glancing around me.

  I hated it when he did that. If he wanted to talk to me, he should show up and talk to me, not whisper things in my mind. And unfortunately, he brought bad news. Just as I had feared, Pothinus was here. Somewhere. I shoved the panicky feelings down and turned back to Cleopatra.

  “What do you think we should do?”

  I was impressed with how strong and calm I sounded. Cleopatra would have no idea that my knees were shaking. The scar on my wrist began to throb, the tell-tale sign that everything was wrong. I needed to fix it, but I wasn’t sure how.

  Cleopatra turned to look at me, as lovely as always and seemingly calm. The dark purple circles beneath her eyes didn’t detract from her beauty even a little. Her voice was cool and detached when she answered.

  “I’m not certain. I can’t allow Antony to know that I sent her. I’m tempted to wait and see what happens.”

  She turned away from me again so that I couldn’t see her face, but I couldn’t believe my ears.

  “We can’t do that. For all we know, there is something wrong- we can’t fail Iras in such a way.”

  She sighed heavily again, laying her head down on her skinny arms.

  “I know…and I don’t want to. But I just don’t see what else we can do. I don’t want to order soldiers to look for her, because Antony will find out. And we don’t even know yet if there is anything to be concerned about. For all we know, she was waylaid by a handsome, strapping soldier.”

  I shook my head. “You know Iras wouldn’t do that.”

  I quickly ran through several scenarios in my head, trying to formulate a plan. The only thing I could think of, though, was to send myself.

  “I’ll go,” I announced calmly. “I’ll go to the temple today and try to find out what happened to her.”