Susanna's Seven Husbands

by Ruskin Bond

  Vronsky lies on his stomach on a big wooden cot as Goonga walks barefoot on his bare back, giving him a massage. Ghalib and Maggie are showing him photographs from an old album.

  GHALIB. This Major—first husband.

  VRONSKY. Handsome chap … He was killed by the panther, I believe …

  Goonga sits astride Vronksy’s back, as if in the saddle. He leans forward and grunts in a monstrous whisper, while massaging Vronsky’s neck.

  GHALIB.

  Vronsky is curious.

  VRONSKY. What did he say …?

  GHALIB. He saying Major … back panther eat him.

  Goonga laughs out loud monstrously. He is joined by Maggie. Vronsky is confused again. Ghalib consoles him.

  GHALIB. No, sir … He is Don’t him, sir … He is number 1.

  He brings out the photograph of Jimmy and his guitar.

  GHALIB. Husband number 2, Jimmy—very good song, sir …

  He starts to sing one of Jimmy’s songs. Goonga mumbles again. Ghalib stops singing and glares at him.

  GHALIB.

  Vronsky is even more curious.

  VRONSKY. What …?

  GHALIB. Nothing, sir … Mad …

  This time Maggie speaks.

  MAGGIE. They say, sir, heroin overdose and then dragged him to .

  She pretends to inject herself.

  Nervous now, Vronsky gets up and starts to put on his shirt. Ghalib shows him another photograph.

  GHALIB. Husband number 3 … We one grave in snow and him

  He mockingly performs the whole action of digging a grave. Vronsky reacts as he hears the chapel bells tolling.

  All three servants laugh like maniacs. Vronsky walks off, but Maggie takes out the Vronsky family picture and blocks his way.

  She giggles as Vronsky’s face turns pale with fear.

  Vronsky’s focus shifts from the photograph to Susanna, in black, standing at the door.

  SUSANNA. This is you, my number 4, with his number 2.

  Maggie, Goonga and Ghalib start to sing from behind.

  TRIO (singing).

  Vronksy picks up his briefcase while muttering.

  VRONSKY. You are all crazy … This is a mad house and I am getting out of here …

  SUSANNA. Not without this.

  She takes the ‘TOP SECRET’ file from the briefcase lying on the table. Its lock has been ripped away. Goonga, Ghalib and Maggie start dancing around Vronsky.

  TRIO (singing). Darling,

  VRONSKY. Anna … please … I can explain … let’s talk.

  He walks towards her but she retreats.

  Ext. Back garden. Night.

  Susanna comes into the garden, pursued by Vronsky, who has tears in his eyes. He is trailed by Maggie, Ghalib and Goonga.

  VRONSKY. Come on, honey, she’s not my wife … She’s my colleague, an agent …

  SUSANNA. Ah! And you? A double agent …?

  Vronsky avoids this one.

  VRONSKY. husband–wife acting

  They are at the edge of the Naag Temple as Susanna holds the file.

  SUSANNA. husband play daddy play no chance.

  VRONSKY (hesitantly). You’re so wrong, Anna, you’re so wrong.

  SUSANNA. Always …

  A mocking smile spreads over her face and she tosses the file into the pit. Vronsky goes after it. Climbing down the thick rope ladder.

  VRONSKY. I’ll quit the job, honey, and I’ll be back for you—forever.

  Vronsky is disappearing into the shadows unaware that he’s passing snakes.

  At the bottom, he picks up his file and screams.

  Up above, Susanna walks away followed by her trio.

  Fade to black.

  Super—

  Ext. Naag Temple. day.

  Some uniformed local policemen and Russian embassy officials are peering over the edge into the pit. In the background, various servants and syces watch as one of the cops cranks a winch, lifting Vronsky’s dead body into the sunlight. It’s stiff and still draped with snakes.

  Someone gives the rope a shake, dumping the snakes back into the pond below. SPLASH!

  Int. Police station. Day.

  Surrounded by common criminals, beggars and other street folk, Susanna sits on a bench in the Panchgani police station. She’s staring at the floor, lost in bleak thoughts.

  An assistant inspector comes up.

  ASSISTANT INSPECTOR.

  Int. DCP’s office. Day

  A cop in plain clothes escorts Susanna inside an office, where a few Russian officials-sip coffee with some Indian plain clothes and uniformed officials. They stop talking and look at Susanna in silence.

  She is escorted to an adjacent room. Another officer in a safari suit stands facing the window, looking outside, and going through some papers in a file. He signals to the officer to leave the room. The officer looks at Susanna and leaves the room.

  OFFICER.

  He turns. It is Keemat Lal, now a serious and elegant senior officer in a dark safari suit and a pair of aviators nestled on his nose. He takes off his glasses and smiles.

  KEEMAT.

  It takes a moment for Susanna to recognize him.

  SUSANNA.

  KEEMAT.

  SUSANNA. Inspector …

  KEEMAT. Assistant Commissioner of Police … ACP, Keemat Lal, Intelligence Bureau.

  He hands her his business card.

  KEEMAT.

  Before she can answer:

  KEEMAT.

  SUSANNA.

  KEEMAT.

  Keemat smiles and continues.

  Susanna looks at him blankly. He clears his throat, and leans forward.

  KEEMAT.

  Susanna takes out the ‘TOP SECRET’ files from her bag and keeps it on the table. Keemat giggles.

  KEEMAT.

  SUSANNA. veg. non-veg ….?

  Keemat giggles again…

  KEEMAT. non-veg ….

  SUSANNA.

  KEEMAT.

  SUSANNA. Vodka

  Keemat bursts into laughter and suddenly covers his mouth, so the officials outside don’t hear him.

  KEEMAT.

  She looks at him sharply.

  KEEMAT. Sorry …

  She smiles.

  Cut to:

  Int. Dining room. Night.

  Susanna sits across from Keemat Lal at her dining table. They have had quite a lot to drink. Ghalib and Maggie are clearing the dessert plates and empty wine bottles.

  SUSANNA. K … have some liquor …

  She starts to pour some into his glass. He bends forward.

  KEEMAT.

  SUSANNA. father favourite brand …

  KEEMAT. Father

  SUSANNA. Very precise … Every inch the proper gentleman.

  A flattered Keemat studies a full-length portrait of Susanna’s father on the wall. She touches his hand for a moment while giving him the whisky.

  KEEMAT. racecourse frock

  She looks at him again. He fumbles.

  KEEMAT. church objection

  She bursts out laughing. She smiles at his boyish foolishness.

  He places his hand inside his jacket pocket and pulls out a vial. Casually, he takes out a blue pill from the bottle. He pops it into his mouth and washes it down with a big gulp of his drink.

  Cut to:

  Ext. Naag Temple. Night.

  Under a starry sky, Susanna leans against a tree as Keemat Lal has a look at the snake pit.

  KEEMAT (leaning over).

  SUSANNA.

  KEEMAT (surprised). Oohh …

  Susanna flirtatiously shakes her head.

  SUSANNA.

  KEEMAT.

  SUSANNA.

  Keemat helplessly looks at her.

  KEEMAT.

  Susanna looks at him in all innocence.

  SUSANNA.

  KEEMAT.

  They look at each other in silence as the crickets sing in the night.

  Int. Susanna’s bedroom. Night.

  Keemat Lal is na
ked in Susanna’s bed, semi-delirious as she sits astride him, pinning his hands down on the bed and grinding away.

  KEEMAT.

  Cut to:

  Ext. Driveway. Day.

  Ready to leave, a shaved and showered Keemat Lal opens the door of his official jeep. Hesitating, he waves at Susanna. He starts to climb in but he walks back to her.

  KEEMAT.

  Susanna smiles. He smiles back.

  KEEMAT.

  Susanna speaks with a firm nod.

  SUSANNA.

  He turns back and walks towards his jeep. Arun’s voice-over continues.

  ARUN (voice-over). Keemat

  Ext. Driveway. Day.

  Keemat’s jeep roars down the driveway. He has a big bouquet in his lap.

  ARUN (voice-over).

  Int. Susanna’s bedroom/study. Day.

  Susanna reads Anna Karenina sitting in the courtyard. Maggie arrives.

  MAGGIE.

  Susanna looks at Maggie and closes her book in anger.

  Cut to:

  Int. Living room. Day.

  Another day. Susanna in a different outfit enters the living room. Keemat is popping a blue pill and washing it down with a glass of water. He notices Susanna walking in. He freezes in his tracks and slyly hides the pill bottle behind him while he displays a stuffed toy for her and smiles.

  A visibly nervous Keemat straightens up as Susanna walks up to him. She grabs the bottle from his hand and he smiles sheepishly.

  ARUN (voice-over). Keemat .

  Int. Bedroom. Night.

  Susanna looks at the ceiling with cold, blank eyes as a bare-bodied Keemat lies on top of her, with his eyes closed, smiling contentedly.

  On the bedside table is a small white vial with its lid off—the label reads ‘Viagra’.

  ARUN (voice-over). option Keemat

  Int. Bedroom. Night.

  Keemat cries like a child as Susanna looks at him blankly.

  KEEMAT.

  He sobs, almost uncontrollably.

  SUSANNA.

  KEEMAT. divorce

  Susanna is alarmed. Keemat takes out a paper from his pocket.

  KEEMAT.

  He hugs her and puts his wet face on her shoulder.

  KEEMAT.

  He pulls out a cross, tied to a thin chain around his neck.

  KEEMAT. Jesus

  Eyes wide, Susanna stares at the dangling crucifix.

  Cut to:

  Int. Chapel. Day.

  Sunlight shines through the stained glass windows.

  The chapel, adorned with floral garlands, is filled with dozens of cops—row after row of Keemat’s friends, dressed in their uniforms, beaming at the joyful groom as he stands at the altar next to Susanna.

  Her face is a mask, flawless and impassive.

  As the local priest reads the marriage vows (MOS), Goonga leaps on the rope hanging down from the tower.

  Ext/Int. Chapel. Day.

  The bell swings and the familiar, incessant clanging begins.

  A heavy rain starts falling.

  PRIEST. Dear friends, after such a tragic accident we find ourselves questioning God. Why, we wonder, why must you take a good man from us …?

  Keemat lies dead in his coffin as the same colleagues and friends mourn his death. Susanna stands expressionless.

  Dissolve to:

  Int. Susanna’s bedroom. Day.

  Priest’s voice-over continues on the soundtrack.

  We see a sweaty and exhausted Susanna lying naked under the sheets, looking up at the ceiling. Keemat is heaped on top of her, motionless.

  As the warm summer breeze comes into the room, a curtain flutters and topples the vial placed on the bedside table with its lid open. Susanna watches as a bunch of blue pills spill on to the floor.

  PRIEST (voice-over)…. leaving such a devoted wife and partner? Is there no rhyme or reason to life? May his soul rest in peace. May God give you the peace of mind.

  Int. Arun’s bedroom—Mumbai. Night.

  The present day. Arun and Nandini are side by side with the album propped up on her knees.

  NANDINI. Oh my God! Viagra bottle poison

  ARUN. Viagra bottle Viagra

  NANDINI. (realises—with a snicker in her tone) Overdose …?

  ARUN. Leading to a massive heart-attack … Very unfortunate … Terrible accident …

  NANDINI. Accident? She killed him …

  ARUN.

  Nandini nods and pulls his cheeks.

  NANDINI.

  Arun smiles.

  ARUN.

  She looks at him suspiciously.

  NANDINI. Aha. Your darling Eva.

  Cut to:

  Ext. Solarium. Day.

  A taxi arrives in the driveway of Susanna’s estate with Eva, 28, a fresh-faced, pale, typical Russian girl looking out of the window. Arun is seated beside her.

  At the porch Goonga, Ghalib and Maggie watch the taxi drive up.

  GHALIB (voice-over).

  Cut to:

  Int. Living room. Night.

  Everyone sits and drinks quietly in the living room which is decorated for New Year’s Eve. A big cake lies ready to be cut on the dining table.

  In the background, a television is tuned to a news channel.

  Ghalib and Arun talk in whispers.

  GHALIB.

  Maggie comes down the stairs.

  MAGGIE.

  ARUN.

  MAGGIE.

  ARUN.

  MAGGIE. I don’t dare any more, man …

  She leans forward.

  MAGGIE. She's going nuts.

  In the background, we hear a news reader on TV reading out loud—‘The Government has struck a deal with the terrorists to free the hostages of IC-814…’

  Everyone turns towards the TV. But Arun picks up a gift-wrapped package and walks upstairs.

  Cut to:

  Int. Susanna’s father’s bedroom. Night.

  Arun taps on the door, then cautiously enters. Most of the lights are out; a few candles illuminate the old-fashioned furniture. Horse and Hound prints hang on the walls, plus various regimental guns and animal-head trophies. A grandfather clock is ticking.

  From the far corner, we hear a soft voice.

  SUSANNA. Sugar …

  ARUN.

  SUSANNA. Oh my, my … look at you …

  ARUN. Happy New Year

  Arun hands over the gift to her, but she doesn’t take it.

  SUSANNA. Moscow

  He looks at her. A streak of jealousy flashes in Susanna’s eyes. Arun smiles as Susanna turns.

  SUSANNA.

  ARUN. Eva …

  SUSANNA.

  ARUN.

  She starts searching through her hair again.

  ARUN.

  SUSANNA.

  ARUN.

  She puts her fingers on her lips.

  SUSANNA. Shhh … it’s a bad omen.

  Arun puts the gift on the table and takes her hair in his hands. He finds the grey hair.

  ARUN.

  She smiles, with a feeling of comfort.

  SUSANNA.

  She holds the hair as Arun gets the scissors from the dressing table.

  SUSANNA.

  ARUN.

  SUSANNA.

  Arun raises the grey hair with his fingers.

  ARUN. gramophone, telephone, museum change

  She looks at him.

  ARUN.

  She smiles as he cuts the hair—snip! He stretches it, displaying it to her.

  SUSANNA. box

  Arun places the hair inside a cosmetic box that contains a few other long, grey hairs.

  ARUN.

  SUSANNA.

  As the clock strikes midnight, she heaves a sigh and moves to a tall oval mirror near the window. Outside, the sound of fireworks.

  SUSANNA. I hate New Year’s Eve.

  Int. Living room. Night.

  Toasts and greetings from everyone as a confused and slightly nervous Eva looks up at the staircase.

>   Cut to:

  Int. Susanna’s father’s bedroom. Continuous.

  She stands in front of the mirror.

  Arun follows her gaze as she inspects herself, full of doom.

  SUSANNA.

  Arun looks at her in silence.

  Cut to:

  Int. Outside Susanna’s fathers bedroom. Continuous.

  Eva walks up the wooden staircase.

  Int. Susanna’s father’s bedroom. Same.

  Susanna now faces Arun.

  ARUN. Miss .

  She opens her robe and shows him her naked body.

  SUSANNA.

  Appalled, Arun averts his gaze. He keeps his gaze fixed on a photo of young Susanna and her father.

  SUSANNA.

  She holds her breasts.

  SUSANNA.

  He won’t look at her.

  SUSANNA. hmm

  Cupping her breasts, she walks to him.

  Cut to:

  Int. Outside Susanna’s fathers bedroom. Continuous.

  Eva stands at the door, trying to hear the conversation.

  Int. Susanna’s father’s bedroom. Continuous.

  As if on cue, a huge Black Widow spider climbs on to the cosmetic case! Arun’s mouth falls open in fear.

  He watches as it makes its way towards the edge of the table. Susanna comes closer.

  ARUN.

  SUSANNA.

  His gaze is fixed, as he grabs the gift-wrapped book and smashes the spider! Susanna shrieks. Eva steps back from the door.

  SUSANNA. Sugar …

  Susanna looks at the dead spider, Arun tears off the gift-wrapping paper, scrapes the squished thing on to a newspaper and makes for the door. He finds a shocked Eva outside. He pulls her by the arm and hurriedly exits.

  Inside, an emotionally wounded Susanna looks at the book, through the remains of the gift wrap paper. It’s The Seven Wives of Bluebeard by Anatole France.

  Cut to:

  Ext. Arun’s quarters. Day.

  Eva opens the door to fetch the morning paper. As she reads the headlines—‘IC-814 HOSTAGES RELEASED’—she notices a gift basket full of roses and a note kept on the footsteps below. She sits down on the front step.

  EVA. Arun … Come look, she’s sent a peace offering.

  Arun is somewhere inside.

  ARUN. She can go to hell.

  Eva pulls away the tissue paper.

  EVA. No … She says … ‘Sweets to the sweet.’

  In the middle of the basket is a cut crystal bowl of sugar cubes.

  EVA. And the sugar cubes.

  ARUN. Send it back …

  EVA. No … it’s really sweet of her …

  As she lifts the sugar bowl, a black snake slithers forth! Eva screams as it slips past her bare feet. Instantly, Arun is there in his pyjamas, just in time to see the snake wriggling across the lawn.