Hollywood: Rock Of Ages

by Chris Solberg

  It happens.

  Trials and Tribulations

  A DOSE OF REALITY - Cupkake

  Hollywood was all fun and games until I got a dose of reality that would be with me forever. Vinnie and I had moved up to Hollywood to fulfill our Rock-N-Roll fantasy and up until now, we were doing just fine. Sure we had issues with money and a little bit of Rock-N-Roll bullshit thrown in, but all in all, it was a fun adventure that most people would die for. With all the sex and partying going on, there was plenty of opportunity for reality to smack you in the face. Stupid stunts that were funny could have been disastrous. Vinnie and I used to climb inside the elevator shaft and ride the car up and down like it was a game. “Elevator surfing” we called it. And all the casual sex had the chance of turning into something permanent if you know what I mean. I know this happened, but it was never discussed because we all had a “live now and die later” attitude. That may have been irresponsible but that’s just the way it was. Then I got my reality check one day.

  It was a typical Hollywood Sunday afternoon, and I was drinking beer upstairs in The Hooligan Stew Pad. Vinnie’s apartment was always the party place with lots of booze, girls, music and the occasional illegal drug floating among the crowd. I never paid much attention to the drugs, it was just a part of the whole Rock-N-Roll scene. Vinnie lived with his band members in a two bedroom apartment. The carpet was supposed to be a light blue, but from all of the foot traffic in that home, it was closer to a light grayish brown. The kitchen was semi clean, for a rock bands standards (no vomit or unknown matter crusting and fermenting on the counter tops like some of the local party pads). You have to keep in mind, a two bedroom apartment in Hollywood was a castle to most in the Hollywood rock business; and yes, they were kings of the building.Hooligan Stew had made quite a name for themselves over the past year and were known as the wild party crew. I remember a particular time in this apartment that would be a major life changing event. This was a dark time in my life.

  As I sat on the dingy, green, cigarette burned couch, drinking more beer than any human should be allowed to attempt to consume, I had a conversation with Matt. Matt was the lead singer of the band. Matt was a very famous face at that time in Hollywood’s history. Matt’s one of many claim to fame was being in a fairly major movie called The Decline of the Western

  Civilization Part II; The Metal Years. This movie had been out for a few years and anyone, yes I mean anyone in the rock business had seen this move at least a dozen times. Matt and I would often sit and bullshit about nothing, spending hours together basically doing nothing. We had a pretty decent relationship, always joking with each other.

  On this particular Sunday, there was a large amount of people in the apartment. People were in and out of the Hooligan Stew Pad as if it was a party, and it always was. This was no planned event, but a typical afternoon at the Hooligans. I was not sure where Vinnie was at this time, but that was very typical for the scene. Nobody was ever sure where anyone was at this place. It was a great time to be alive. This was a place that most teenagers would dream about. Hollywood had an energy at that time that was hard to explain unless you were there in person. Everybody around us did not have a care in the world. Well maybe one care. Was their hair puffed out enough? What their makeup smeared? This was what all of the guys in the local rock bands were worried about at the time! I am sure the girls were worse!

  There was a nice swimming pool downstairs in the courtyard that would draw attention to all of the visitors in the area. It was a real treat for some. The temperature even in the fall was still worth a sit by the pool. The beer continued to flow like it was the last day on Earth. Matt had that look on his face, the look, the grin, that smile. Matt walked (maybe stumbled) over to me and said “Hey Cupkake, there are a couple of new girls in town... Sara and her cousin... I don’t know what her cousins name is, but she is a fairly good looking blonde from the midwest!”

  I thought nothing much regarding Matt’s comment about the two girls from the midwest. I had seen these types of woman come and go daily looking for the “party” in the area. Matt had mentioned that he had met them around town while he was cruising the strip. I was trying to figure out why Matt would try to set me up with any woman. That was completely out of character for Matt. He did not worry about me getting any woman. There was something up... I would later find out.

  I stayed downstairs at the pool with several other friends, sunning, drinking and having a good time. My apartment was right next to the pool. In fact, the apartment that I shared with my roommate used to be a pool house changing room. This place was small. I lived in the front portion of the apartment and my roommate lived in the rear portion. If I was to guess the size, the total square footage of this place would be approximately 400 square feet total. Friends referred to it as the shoe box. My bed was in the living room/ kitchen portion of the apartment. It was always nice to be able to open the fridge while lying in bed. As you can imagine, there was not much privacy in this small place we called home. The bathroom was located in the back portion of the apartment. My roommate, Lizzie, who was also a very famous face and name about Hollywood, did not seem to mind when I came barging back to use the restroom facilities. That was always an interesting trip to the restroom!

  I was done hanging out by the pool, but far from being finished with drinking and partying with all of my buddies. I came into my little apartment and began to clean up from hanging outside by the pool. Lizzie was always looking for the next party and of course he inquired as to what I had planned for the evening. I told him the same as usual, you know... drinking with the crew upstairs. Without any further discussion, Lizzie shrugged his shoulders and said “All right shredder, lets go!” We headed upstairs to continue the fun. “Shredder” was a nickname given to me by Lizzie. It means bitchin’ fast guitar player. I was fairly intoxicated by this time (surprise, surprise). I could not tell you what time it was, or if I had to go to work the following day. I didn’t care, I was living for the moment. Lizzie and I arrived at Vinnie’s house, aka the Hooligan Pad, with a beer in hand ready to have more fun. There were lots of people in the room, guys, girls, all shapes sizes and colors! It was always really entertaining to see who would be there.

  My eyes caught a very beautiful young brunette. She was stunning. Matt staggered over to me, stoned and drunk out of his mind, put his arm around the seemingly innocent girl and introduced her to me as Sara. Matt pulled me to the side and asked me if I liked Sara. I told him of course I did. Matt gave me a shitty grin and stated, “Well keep your fuckin’ hands off of her Cupkake, she‘s mine!” I laughed (but was annoyed) and told him I would not lay a hand on her. We always attempted to respect each others

  possible future girlfriends or one night stands. I quickly forgot about Sara and galavanted about the apartment like an idiot looking for only god knows what!

  As the evening moved on you would think the apartment would become more empty. Not the case! This party pad became more and more packed and the night moved on. Where were these guys importing all of these girls from? Ok, there was an occasional strange male wandering around that none of us knew. But that did not matter, there was always new people to meet and the male to female ratio was usually in favor of the guys.

  Matt pulled me to the side again, and he was much worse than before. I always wondered how he could be so intoxicated and stay awake or not get sick. Matt slurred a loud whisper in my ear. Matt asked, “Do you see that blonde girl over in the corner sitting by herself? That’s Sara’s cousin, she needs some attention.” I looked over to her and she was staring right at the two of us. She probably heard Matt telling me that she needed attention. Matt’s whisper was closer to a person talking. Matt pulled me into the kitchen to speak with me regarding the blonde girl. He continued by telling me that he would bet that I could not get that girl in bed by midnight. I laughed at Matt’s stupid bet and told him he was crazy. I was extremely cocky at that time of my life. I knew I would not have any problem wit
h the new girl in town. I could easily get that girl. After all, she was new to the area, not the hottest girl anyone had ever seen, but would make a good partner for some fun that evening.

  Matt continued to annoy me, telling me what a great couple we would make. I knew why he was trying to get me together with Sara’s cousin. I was slow, but not stupid! Matt knew that if my attention went toward Sara’s cousin, I would not be a threat to try to date Sara. Matt’s ploy worked. I pursued the blonde chick.

  I swaggered toward the girl (more likely stumbling from an overdose of alcohol and lack of sleep) and introduced myself, you know, as I would to any strange new face in the apartment. I sat down next to her and she said her name was Suzie. She had a smirk on her face while I slurred my speech and attempted to have some sort of conversation with her. I don’t recall if she was drinking, but I do know that she was nowhere near my level of intoxication. After just a few minutes of failed conversation, I looked down and realized she was wearing a dress. This was not very typical in Hollywood for a young woman to have a nice dress on. All of the other woman usually had mini-skirts, or skin tight pants, or some type of grungy jeans on. I elected to put my hand on her knee. I expected Suzie to punch or slap me, because I had only known her for five minutes and I was already pawing her. Suzie’s smirk continued as we spoke about who knows what! I know that the conversation was not very stimulating for either of us, so I asked Suzie to come down to my “shoe box” apartment. Suzie accepted the invitation to go down stairs. I thought to myself. “Wow! That was easy!”

  We made it into the tiny place downstairs I called home. I do not remember Suzie’s reaction to me residing in the kitchen of the apartment. I had tunnel vision. My goal was to get her into bed. What were my chances? I had only known this girl for 10, maybe 15 minutes! Not that that was unusual! Well, it happened, and my goal was met. Not very memorable. It was short and not very sweet. I remember being semi bored and telling Suzie in the middle of the sex act that I really liked her cousin Sara. Admittedly, I used to do stuff like that all the time just to be rude. I don’t know why, but I did. I expected her to get pissed off, but she kept her cool. I am not sure why I was trying to upset her. I guess I was just being an asshole. Suzie responded with an unexpected answer of “I don’t care who you sleep with as long as you come home to me.” What kind of crap was that? Must be a mid-west thing. I thought to myself that this was a strange girl. Not too far from weird here in Hollywood, and I had heard and seen lots of strange things here in Hollywood. After the not so exciting intimate moment, Suzie and I went back upstairs and blended into the party. We were not missed. Everyone was already so intoxicated that time had stood still and everything seemed normal to everyone around us. Or maybe nobody gave a fuck. Remember, people disappear here all the time. That was “par for the course”. And where was Vinnie?

  I continued partying with everyone until the late night hours. I don’t remember Suzie ever saying goodbye that evening. I was probably too drunk to remember. I can’t tell you anything about Suzie, I didn’t even know her. Suzie was a complete stranger that I had just had sex with. Not a very proud moment.Eventually I did see Suzie again. I would guess approximately one week later. She had called me on my home telephone, but I don’t remember giving my number out. Of course, the number was plastered on band fliers everywhere in Hollywood. Everyone in the City of Los Angeles and the surrounding areas had my phone number. Suzie called me that following weekend wondering what I was doing. I was not really interested in her and I did not really want to hang around her. After all, in my eyes she was an “easy girl”, nothing of girlfriend material. Just another “piece of ass” running wild around town. It is funny how that works with guys. We want a woman, but if we get her too easily, we no longer want her. Weird! I told her to call me back in a few hours and I would let her know what was happening for the evening. I really had no plans to call her.

  I was a self centered, pseudo rock star with an attitude. Why would you go to a party with another woman? That was like bringing sand to the beach. Those were always the chumps in the rock scene, bringing their “boat anchor” or “albatross” girlfriends to the fun. I wanted no part of that! Suzie did not fit the Hollywood rock scene, she was too plain to fit that part.

  I received a phone call from Vinnie Vegas just minutes after Suzie hung up. I asked him where he was all night and he gave me some cock-n-bull story that went nowhere. Vinnie told me about some great party that was happening in The Valley. Yuk!! The valley was a long way to travel but it was at the Asphalt Ballet house so we knew it would be raging. In Hollywood, we would hang out with famous bands even if you didn’t like them hoping somehow to benefit from it. We both wanted to go to the party, but neither one of us was willing to drive. Vinnie and I both wanted to get smashed at the party. That way you could haggle and annoy the guys without feeling guilty. It was a sport that we always loved to indulged in. To invite yourself in and rave on about how great Bang Tango was, would always get under their craw. Besides, what was the point of going to a party if you could not drink? That did not sound like fun. The wheels in my head began to turn. How could we get to that party without driving? A light bulb went on in my head. Why did I not think of this earlier? Suzie! Yes! She could be the driver to this party. I did not check to see if Suzie could drive us to the party. I was just going to tell her that she was our driver. That is how it worked in my world. I never checked with any girls to see if anything was alright. I just gave them instructions and they usually followed them.

  I called Vinnie and told him that I had a ride for the both of us to get to the party out in The Valley. Vinnie’s reaction was always calm and cool. Even though he might be excited. He stated, “Alright, I will be ready in a few. Come on up and have a beer,” Of course, I agreed to his request.

  Suzie drove us to the party as per my plan. It was good to see Mike Kiner again, after all, it was he who got me into Street Angel so many years ago. Nobody saw much of him after Asphalt Ballet hit it big, so this was a rare moment to say hi. We compared road stories and talked about playing some of the same clubs out in the Midwest. T-Bone the bass player, was a quiet guy who never really said much to anybody, but I said hello to him anyway. Gary Jefferies their singer, was the good ol’ southern boy who would always offer you a drink. It’s true what they say about Southern hospitality. Julius Ulrich was the typical unassuming laid back rhythm guitarist who reminds me so much of Michael Lardie of Great White. Both these guys are the back bone and a big part of the personality of their bands, but would never make a huge thing about it. They even kind of look and dress the same! But Danny Clarke, the flashy lead guitarist was definitely the coolest guy in the band. Danny did not have one ounce of the rock star ego that you could get from some of the bigger bands around town. Instead, Danny would go out of his was to seek you out and shake your hand. And he was never bullshitting, he always remembered my name and exactly what we were doing the last time we met. Honestly, I didn’t really know him that well, but Danny always made me feel like we were best friends. Of course, everybody at the party was clamoring for their attention, so I said my hellos and began to smooze the party. I don’t remember anything much about that party, after that. Vinnie told me later that we collected money from everybody and brought back about 100 tacos from Taco Bell, but I don’t remember. I was extremely intoxicated again, and I think I slept with Suzie that night also. I am embarrassed to say that I have no Idea what happened. It was a pure alcohol induced coma. I woke up alone, but that did not tell me much. She may have been there. Maybe. The only thing I remember that morning was the headache from whatever I was drinking that evening. I would not see Suzie again until New Years Eve.

  New Years Eve -Cupkake

  Isn’t New Year’s Eve supposed to be a magical night? Isn’t it supposed to be the party of all parties? That’s what I thought! I was at the Hooligan Stew pad and if the party was going off on a normal Sunday night, you can

  imagine what New Year’s was lik
e. I remember everybody that was considered a friend or otherwise was there. People wall to wall, drunk or high on some other substance. Vinnie was decked out in a red top hat with the Ace O’ Hearts in the headband and kept telling me about some chick who was a “sure thing”. I don’t recall much about this particular evening except some unknown woman in her late 30’s, with really bad breath. I mean really bad like rotting animal, old ashtray, mixed with dirty socks. She came stumbling over to me and told me that Suzie was pregnant. As this woman stated this shocking news to me, she pointed in Suzie’s direction slurring something that sounded like, “You’d better just go over and talk to her.” She seemed to revel in the moment and I did not know what to say. I was in shock. I know people use that word often, but this was the only time in my life that I felt numb. I was not excited about the news at all. In fact, I was angry at myself for being so irresponsible and stupid.

  I made my way through the boisterous group of people and talked with Suzie regarding the pregnancy. I do not remember of the gist of the conversation, but I know it did not go very well. The major part of the conversation that made me extremely angry was the fact that Suzie told me that she was going to have the baby, and give it up for adoption. I told Suzie that this was not an option. Suzie did not seem to care. She told me that she was the one that could make that decision and that would be final. She explained that she talked it over with her mother and the best thing to do was to give the baby up for adoption because we were both too young to raise the child. Suzie continued to explain that her mother should be out in LA in a few months to assist her with the pregnancy. I went to the far side of the room where I could no longer see the sight of Suzie and started hanging out with a group of my close friends, including Vinnie. I told the group about Suzie’s news that she shared with me. Vinnie listened to me, but I don’t think he heard a word I said. Probably too pre-occupied with his chick de jour. Or on this night, chick de ano. As time when on, I became more angry. This New Year’s sucked! There was no way I was going to have any fun now. Everybody around me was cheering and toasting at midnight, and I was stewing in my best outfit. I was really mad a Suzie at this point and wanted nothing more to do with the girl. I think she started to get the message because she started hanging on the only person in the room that I know did not care for me. The drummer of Hooligan Stew. His name was Perris and he was still stewing about a prior incident where he thought I was trying to pick up on his girlfriend. Suzie was on his arm laughing and smiling, and it was obvious to everyone that she was trying to upset me or make me jealous. It did not work.I was told the following day that Suzie stayed the night with Perris. I did not care. I thought this may be my way to get out of Suzie’s life for good. In my drunken haze, I had convinced myself that Suzie was lying about the pregnancy and she was just trying to get attention. I thought for sure that even Perris was in on the whole thing because I thought to myself, why would he want to date a pregnant girl?