The Cowboy She Never Forgot

by Cheryl Biggs

  “Stop it!” she snapped at herself.

  Flapjack screeched and jumped from the table.

  “Oh, not you, Flappy,” Kate moaned, following the cat into the kitchen.

  He eyed her warily.

  She poured some milk into his bowl as a peace offering.

  The cat immediately began to lap it up, his loud purr filling the room.

  Kate smiled and bent to brush a hand down his back. “Okay, you’re on guard,” she said, rising. “Watch the place, okay?”

  She locked the door of the house behind her and tried not to think of Shane Larrabee as she drove back toward Reno and the fairgrounds where the rodeo was set up, along with a carnival, exhibition halls and a craft mall.

  Kate pulled into the parking lot and looked toward the large exhibition building where the party was being held. Its double doors were wide open and surrounded by a string of white lights. Music floated on the air, and several dozen people milled around the front of the building.

  She drew in a deep breath and climbed from the Jeep. “Work,” she mumbled to herself. She was going to this party to work, not play. She needed to familiarize herself with the faces that belonged to the rodeo, talk to as many people as possible, and see if any pushed her suspicion button. So, whether Shane Larrabee was in attendance tonight or not really didn’t matter.

  She held on to the lie as tightly as she could and walked into the huge building, pausing in the doorway to look around and get her bearings. The interior had been decorated like a barn. Hay bales were stacked around the edges of the room and high in the corners. A long, elaborate bar that looked straight out of an 1880s saloon stood against one wall. Tables and chairs were set up at both ends of the room, with a dance floor in the center and a band on a small stage to one side of the bar.

  The place was already crowded, with people hovering around the bar, sitting, standing, or weaving about the tables. There were groups of cowboys talking everywhere, and several dozen couples on the dance floor doing the two-step to the music blaring from the speakers that had been placed strategically here and there.

  Shane saw Kate the moment she paused in the open doorway. Surrounded by the tiny white lights that had been strung about the doorjamb, she looked almost ethereal, like the ghost of herself that had mercilessly haunted his dreams for the past three years.

  He forced himself to turn away and, leaning on the bar, told the bartender to bring him another beer.

  “Hey, Kate Morgan, glad you showed.”

  Kate turned at Traci Marsted’s greeting. The woman was dressed, head to toe, in fire-engine-red, form-fitting jeans and shirt. Kate smiled. “I didn’t realize it would be so crowded.”

  Traci laughed and waved an arm as if to encompass the entire room. “Everyone who’s anyone and connected with the rodeo is here. That includes all the bigwigs from the casinos who throw in a little sponsor money, along with all our regular sponsors of course, every vendor you can think of, and most of their employees, groomers, gofers, every member of the Reno Rodeo Association, and probably all their friends and relatives, and then there’s little ol’ us—the contestants.”

  “Wow.” Kate felt her spirits plunge along with her plan. She hadn’t realized there were actually this many people involved with the rodeo. There was absolutely no way she could familiarize herself with this many faces, let alone rule in or out anyone as suspicious.

  About the only ones connected to the rodeo who weren’t here, she realized, were the animals. Kate smiled to herself. Well, at least she could rule them out as suspects. She scanned the room, telling herself she was merely looking at faces, and knowing full well she was looking for Shane.

  “First thing we’ve got to do is get you a drink,” Traci said, taking Kate by the arm and steering her toward the bar. “Then I’ll start introducing you around.”

  They were halfway across the room when Kate saw Shane, almost directly in their path, leaning against the bar and seemingly deep in conversation with a petite, and very pretty, brunette.

  Kate stopped, and a couple about to dance past bumped into her.

  Traci turned. “Hey, come on, we’re in the middle of the dance floor. This could get dangerous.”

  “I, ah...” Kate smiled apologetically toward the couple, who were already moving away, then glanced toward Shane, hoping he hadn’t seen.

  Relief and jealousy sprang to life within her. He was still talking to the brunette. “Sorry, but, ah, I need to visit the ladies’ room, Traci. You go on, I’ll catch up with you later, okay?”

  Traci frowned. “You getting cold feet?”

  Kate shook her head. “No, really. I’ll catch up with you.”

  Before Traci could question her further, Kate slipped away and into the crowd, but the moment she saw the line for the ladies’ room, she knew hiding out in there, even for a few minutes, was out of the question.

  For the next hour she managed to avoid Shane by making her way busily around the room, introducing herself to as many people as she could. Along the way several cowboys asked her to dance and she found out that her two-step wasn’t as rusty as she’d thought. She also ran into two cowboys who “kinda remembered” her.

  “Didn’t you hang around with Shane Larrabee for a while?” one of them asked. “Few years back?”

  To which the other promptly added... Yeah, you’re the cop, right?” He’d grinned.

  “Used to be,” Kate answered, “until a bullet found me and I decided that wasn’t the way I wanted to go.”

  They’d laughed then and told her she was better off taking her chances on the back of a horse.

  “You meet everyone yet?” Jim Hodges said, coming up beside her as she stood at one end of the bar sipping on a designer water.

  Kate glanced up at him. “Kind of hard to tell who’s who around here,” she answered. “I’d hoped to be able to meet all the contestants tonight, and the people directly involved in the day-to-day workings of the rodeo, rather than sponsors and vendors, but...” She shrugged.

  “Yeah, well, if I’d’a known we were going to be looking for a crackpot, I’d’a had people wear name tags.” He started to move away, then stopped and looked back at her. “Wait a minute, I’ve got an idea.”

  Before Kate could ask what his idea was, he turned and wove his way across the dance floor toward the stage. Jumping up on it, he grabbed the microphone from the cowboy who’d just been about to burst into song. “Hey, everybody, listen up.”

  He had to repeat himself twice before the room finally quieted.

  “We’ve got something special planned now. The next dance is going to be a line dance and we want only the rodeo contestants to participate.”

  People started moving around.

  “Come on, Kate,” Traci said, coming up beside Kate and nudging her arm.

  “Oh, I don’t...” How could she watch if she was dancing?

  “Hey, you’re a contestant, aren’t you?”

  No, Kate thought. “Yeah, I guess I am.” Rather than risk a scene, she hurried onto the dance floor and joined one of the quickly forming lines just as the music started and it began moving.

  Heel, toe, heel, toe, turn, stomp, two steps forward, one step back...

  She mistakenly took a second step backward and practically fell into the arms of the person behind her. Kate hastily regained her balance and turned. “Oh, I’m sorr—”

  The apology died in her throat as she looked into Shane’s eyes. They were dark with emotion, but Kate wasn’t sure what emotion it was. Before she had time to think, he grabbed her arm and hooked it around his own. “We’re about to get trampled,” he muttered, and pulled her toward him as the line began to move steadily to the right.

  She fell into step beside him, watching his feet and doing what he did and trying to ignore the rush of heat that had swept over her at his nearness and wasn’t subsiding. Her heart pounded madly and she tried to attribute it to the fact that they were dancing and a crowd of people was watching. She wa
sn’t used to being watched. She was nervous. Out of her element. The physical upheaval going on in her body had nothing to do with the fact that Shane was beside her, that her arm was looped over his, that the heat of that touch was searing her flesh, robbing her of breath, and his nearness was all she could think about.

  She swallowed past the lump that had formed in her throat and ordered herself to calm down. She was supposed to be checking out the other contestants, at least identifying them by looks—not swooning over Shane Larrabee.

  “Relax,” Shane said softly, startling Kate out of her musing and admonishments to herself.

  They sidestepped again.

  Kate stole a quick glance up at him. Relax. Right. She should relax, wanted to relax, but how was she supposed to do that when her emotions and body were so intent on betraying her? She thought she’d put Shane behind her, gotten over all the feelings she’d had for him. Her stomach did a somersault as his gaze caught hers and he winked.

  Why was he making this so difficult?

  “See, it’s not so hard when you don’t think about it,” he said softly.

  No, she thought, the dancing wasn’t hard, it was the not throwing herself into his arms like a lovesick ninny that was proving hard.

  Kate tried to ignore the quivering sensation that was running rampant through her body. The attraction she felt toward him was just a physical thing, that’s all. It had to be. A person couldn’t lock love away in a dark closet and ignore it for three years then open the door and have it come flying out in full force again. That was ridiculous.

  “Hey, everyone,” Hodges said into the microphone again, “wasn’t that great?”

  Applause erupted from those who’d been watching the rodeo contestants dance, jerking Kate from her thoughts. “Oh, well, thanks,” she said to Shane, and turned to walk back to the bar. She looked around, realizing that, surrounded by people, she’d momentarily lost her sense of direction. But she had to get some water, both for her dry throat, and to throw on her face. It was burning up.

  The music slipped into a soft, slow ballad.

  Shane reached out and touched her arm, not knowing what he was going to say, or what he wanted, only knowing that he didn’t want her to leave. “Kate?”

  Reluctantly, she turned and looked back at him.

  Jim Hodges’s voice blared through the speakers again. “So, one more for the contestants,” he said, “and this time we’re going to put the spotlight on them and introduce each to one and all. Guys, if there aren’t enough ladies in our group, grab yourself one of the ‘outsiders.’”

  Shane’s eyes held her prisoner as they studied her with a curious intensity.

  “I—really should—” She started to turn away again. Jim Hodges was doing this spotlight dance thing for her, so that she could identify all the contestants, so she should find a good spot to watch from—and get away from Shane.

  Shane reached for her before she’d taken more than a step, his hand wrapping gently around her arm and turning her back toward him. “Don’t run away just yet, Red,” he said softly, the deep timbre of his voice cutting through her thoughts.

  No one had ever called her Red except Shane, and his use of it now, the flash of memories it instantly brought back to her, unreasonably shattered her resolve to get away from him, to put some distance between them.

  His arms slipped around her waist as he pulled her to him. Her body fit instantly and comfortably to his length. One of his hands splayed upon her back, burning her skin. His chest pressed against her breasts.

  Kate’s senses reeled.

  “I’ve missed you, Red,” Shane said softly, the warmth of his breath riffling through the whisper of curls at her temple. He didn’t know what he was doing, or why he was doing it, and at the moment, he didn’t care. Tomorrow he might curse himself for hours and wonder at his foolishness, but for right now she was in his arms again, and that was all that mattered, all that he needed to know.

  Kate found it hard to breathe, impossible to swallow. The thought of walking away from him and doing her job vanished from her mind as if it had never been there. Her arms slid up to encircle his neck.

  Shane felt like his entire being was under siege. He hadn’t intended to get anywhere near Kate tonight. He’d promised himself that earlier, and he’d renewed the vow when he’d spotted her entering the building. Everything in him had fought against that decision, but he’d intended to hold to it, and he’d figured that in a room filled with more than two hundred people, staying away from Kate shouldn’t be all that difficult. His defenses had suffered a blow when he’d glanced to his right during the line dance and seen her next to him, but when she’d taken a wrong step and stumbled into his arms, he’d known he was lost.

  She didn’t love him, but he knew she desired him. He could see it in her eyes, feel it in the air about them, and maybe...he sighed softly...maybe that was enough. Maybe he could settle for that this time around. Have a fling with her while they were together in Reno, and get her out of his system once and for all.

  Kate looked up at him. “Shane, I...”

  The invitation she saw smoldering in his dark eyes killed the protest she’d been about to utter at being in his embrace. All of their lost yesterdays were there in the fathomless blue that pulled at her senses, along with a flame of desire she’d thought never to see again.

  She felt her own body respond, and though she tried to fight it, one hand slipping down to rest against his chest, the urge to give in to the emotions churning to life inside of her was almost overwhelming. Kate felt his heartbeat beneath her hand, like a touch of intimacy to her soul.

  Guilt seized her in a surprise attack. What was she doing? She couldn’t let this happen. She had to stop things before they got out of hand. Nothing had really changed between them, or for them. Everything was just as impossible for them now as it had been three years ago. Even if he didn’t know that, she did.

  Yet she didn’t pull away from him. Emotion caught at the back of her throat as she realized she not only couldn’t tell Shane the truth, but that she didn’t want to.

  She moved with him easily, their steps flowing, the music swirling around them.

  The spotlight jumped from couple to couple, and Hodges introduced each to the audience, but Kate didn’t notice. She didn’t even notice when it landed on them and their names were called out.

  Shane however saw Tim wave at him, then raise his thumb in salute and grin. He closed his eyes and tucked his head against Kate’s, wanting to do nothing more than enjoy the moment.

  His body was hard beneath her touch. The scent of his cologne mingled with the natural scent of the man to tease Kate’s senses. The loneliness she’d been living with for the past three years, the emptiness that was always with her, but which she’d come to accept as just a natural part of herself, was gone. The realization was swift, and even more shocking as she admitted to herself now that it had been gone since the moment she’d seen him again.

  Kate felt a momentary sense of panic. It didn’t matter. She couldn’t let herself become involved with Shane again, couldn’t let herself feel like that. It wouldn’t be fair, not to herself and not to him. She should tell him the truth. Kate opened her mouth, then swiftly closed it again. She had her orders. If she went against them and Aames found out, he would bring her up on disciplinary charges and her chance for a gold shield would most likely be nonexistent.

  And Shane would walk away from her again anyway, and possibly even put himself in more danger—unwittingly, by trying to avoid her.

  As the music played they moved slowly, bodies pressed together.

  Shane refused to let any thoughts into his mind other than how good it felt to hold Kate in his arms again. He was playing with fire, he knew that, but it felt so damned good he just couldn’t resist.

  One song led into another, the people around them became an obscure haze of reality, there but not there, and hesitations and doubts faded away as if they’d never existed.


  Shane’s arms tightened around her, pulling her even closer. He lowered his head, cocked it to one side, and brushed his lips lightly across hers.

  Kate gasped at the pleasure that swept through her body, the heat that erupted within her veins and instantly turned them to streams of fiery need.

  As her memories melded with reality and three years’ worth of longing threatened to come true, the dreams, the fears and anger she’d harbored inside her since the day he’d walked out of her life crashed down around Kate. Relentlessly they pounded at her consciousness, trying to warn her away from what she was doing. But she ignored their screams. She had lived with them for so long she had become used to them, even if before this night they had merely whispered their presence to her, tortured her with their reminders of what could have been. But now she had a chance to vanquish those tormenting voices, if only temporarily.

  Shane’s hands moved sensuously over her back, pressing her to him as his lips brushed tentatively over hers again.

  The hunger for a deeper kiss left Kate’s lips quivering, while the touch of his hands was like fire on her body, searing through the delicate fabric of her shirt and into her skin as if branding her with his mark, his claim, forever.

  Emotions she hadn’t felt in years engulfed her, a profusion of want, need and yearning that was so intense she trembled beneath their onslaught. What they were doing was so wrong. She needed to tell him, needed to stop him.

  Instead her arms tightened around his neck and she clung to him as if clinging to life, wanting never to let him go, never to be let go.

  Their differences ceased to exist. There was only them, this night, this moment.

  Shane let all the doubts and frustrations of the past three years slip from his mind. He had never expected to see her again, never expected to hold her in his arms and feel the kind of passion only Kate had ever ignited within him.

  And it wasn’t as if he hadn’t tried to find that feeling in himself for other women. He had, but it had never worked.

  There had been far too many nights he had gone to sleep thinking about her, remembering how good it had felt to hold her, kiss her, make love to her. For the first year after he’d left her, he’d nearly died a thousand times, cursed himself to hell and back, turned his anger on her, then pulled it back on himself.