Amagi Brilliant Park: Volume 6

by Shouji Gatou

  —But the new song you composed for them, I Don’t Give a Puff, is selling quite well, rii. Especially in Maple Land.

  Macaron: “Just like it says, I don’t give a puff, ron. I composed it because my acting manager, Kanie-kun, told me to write a song. And you know, ron? It’s pretty fun hearing three industrious cuties say the word “puff” a lot, ron.”

  —That’s very true, rii! It’s rock in its own way, rii. The Task Force ABC trio are all mortals. Do they know what “puff” really means, rii?

  Macaron: “No. I haven’t told them either, ron. Isn’t it funnier if they say it without knowing, ron?”

  —That’s an interesting question, rii. Personally I’d prefer to see them perform with embarrassment and tears in their eyes just after learning it, rii.

  Macaron: “Hmmm. Tiramii said the same thing, ron. Maybe I’ll think about it some day.”

  —I can’t wait, rii. Thanks for coming today, rii!

  ×　　　×　　　×

  [From Maple Land men’s magazine Weekly Playfairy]

  Let’s Learn More About Her! Part 238

  Everyone’s been talking about that newly prospering ager, Amagi Brilliant Park! But did you know it’s packed with breathtaking beauties?!

  This week we’re introducing AmaBri’s secretary, secretly rising in popularity, Sento Isuzu-kun. She was trained as a Maple Land royal guard, but she’s also got a dynamite body.

  We sent one of our editors to probe the secrets of this sexy and elite walking pile of pheromones!

  [Reporter: Pomerin Wankol]

  —Thanks for agreeing to this interview today!

  Isuzu-kun: “Not at all. Our head of administration made the introduction. But... Playfairy? I’m afraid I’m not familiar with that publication.”

  —Oh! It’s a gentleman’s magazine. By gentlemen, for gentlemen! Most women don’t know much about it!

  Isuzu-kun: “I see... I’m merely a secretary at the moment, so I’m sure there will be a great deal I can’t answer. Is that all right?”

  —It’s just fine! Let’s start with your measurements!

  Isuzu-kun: “......? Does that have anything to do with the park?”

  —Yes! Measurementology is a long-standing method of fortunetelling in the Tiradaho region. It’s very accurate. We do it with all the magical realm celebrities. Knowing your measurements will give us a window into the future of Amagi Brilliant Park!

  Isuzu-kun: “Did you say you were born in Tiradaho?”

  —I was, mii! Oops, I just slipped into my hometown accent!

  Isuzu-kun: “...I see. I’m getting a bad feeling about this. There’s a member of our cast born in Tiradaho, as well...”

  —Never mind that! Just give me your measurements!

  Isuzu-kun: “I’m afraid I don’t have them. I’ve never taken them.”

  —Then let’s do that! I have a measuring tape with me right now! Stand up, hold out your arms... hey, where are you pointing that gun? Stop that!

  Isuzu-kun: “I don’t need my fortune told. Ask a different question.”

  —I beg your pardon. That’s really too bad... Anyway, a serious question!

  Isuzu-kun: “If you please.”

  —How old were you when you first saw a naked man?

  (The reporter was shot dead)

  Isuzu-kun: “Was that a serious question?”

  —(reviving) ...I beg your pardon. It’s another Tiradaho fortune-telling method... Hey, please don’t point that gun at me again!

  Isuzu-kun: “Ask a different question.”

  —Okay! A different question. White, yellow, pink. Please assign each color to one of your castmates.

  Isuzu-kun: “Colors? Castmates?”

  —Yes. White, yellow, and pink. If you please.

  Isuzu-kun: “Hmm. White... Macaron, I think.”

  —Okay. That’s the fairy from the Music Theater, right?

  Isuzu-kun: “Yellow would be Lord Moffle. Pink would be Tiramii, I suppose.”

  —Tiramii-san. That’s the fairy who runs the Flower Adventure, right?

  Isuzu-kun: “Yes. What of it?”

  —Ta-daa! That was actually a psychological test. White represents the person you want to marry. Yellow is the person you most admire. And pink is... the person you want to puff! Ahahaha! Ahahaha! Ahahahahahahahaha!!

  (The reporter is shot to death violently and repeatedly)

  Isuzu-kun: “Don’t be disgusting.”

  —(reviving) But this psychological test is extremely accurate. About 42%—

  Isuzu-kun: “That sounds less like a psychological test and more like a party game. ...And the three I mentioned just happen to be that color. Macaron is white, Moffle is yellow, and Tiramii is pink. That’s all.”

  —(clicks tongue) Aw. No fun!

  (The reporter is shot to death repeatedly and offhandedly)

  Isuzu-kun: “Are you going to ask serious questions or not?”

  —(offhandedly reviving) Okay. I think I’ll finally ask a serious question. ...You work as the secretary to the acting manager, right? It sounds really hard.

  Isuzu-kun: “It’s not, really. We’re all in this together.

  —Oh, I mean for the people around you. I bet a body like yours gets a lot of looks in the workplace! And as a secretary, you must wear a body-hugging skirtsuit sometimes! Even I can’t stop staring at your chest and thighs!

  Isuzu-kun: “......”

  —That’s what I meant when I asked if it was hard. Do you see? Do you understand what I’m getting at?

  Isuzu-kun: “Why are you acting like this? (flustered)”

  —Okay, tell me how it feels to be a woman who gets all the men staring at her! Be candid! In particular, how do you feel about your chest? Eh? Because those tits are dynamite! Come over here, mii! Come here and let me touch them, mii!

  (The reporter is shot to death)

  Isuzu-kun: “This is extremely gross.”

  —(reviving) Excuse me! Next question!

  Isuzu-kun: “Let’s get this over with.”

  —How would you feel about doing a photo spread for our magazine?!

  (The reporter is shot to death)

  —(reviving) It would skyrocket our sales! Don’t worry, we’ll edit out the juiciest bits...

  (The reporter is shot to death)

  —(reviving) S-So, if you got an offer to... er, do AVs...

  (The reporter is shot to death)

  —(reviving) I’m sorry, please do—

  (The reporter is shot to death)

  —(reviving) Sto—

  (The reporter is shot to death)

  —Forgi—

  (The reporter is shot for the rest of eternity)

  ×　　　×　　　×

  RE: Excerpt of Articles

  To: Head of Administration Tricen (cc: Sento Isuzu)

  From: Kanie Seiya

  Kanie here. I looked through the articles. Here’s what we’ll do about them.

  1. Re: Mapleburg Post

  Moffle seemed to be aiming for gaffes, and he succeeded. I don’t know much about Maple Land’s politics, but they seem complicated, so I’ll need an in-depth report about that later. And next time, I’ll sit in on the interview with him.

  2: Re: Monthly Ager

  This is fine. No issues with Muse’s responses. They’re great. We need to find a way to shut the other three up, or educate them about how to deal with the media.

  3: Re: Monthly Pockin’ Ron

  It’s a music magazine, so I think he’s trying to pander to their core audience. There’s a lot of stuff in there we wouldn’t want the general public to hear. In the future, send Tricen or Sento in on interviews with him.

  4: Re: Weekly Playfairy

  What the hell was with that perv reporter? Now I see why Sento was in such a bad mood that day. I also see why she shot you for introducing her to him.

  Poor Sento. Never let that reporter in here again.

  It’s just a good thing I didn’t let him
meet Latifah; Moffle would have killed him.

  Afterword

  With production on the anime almost finished, I was spending a lot of time vegging out or working on small tasks. The next thing I knew, it had been six months since volume five. I’m sorry! You let your guard down for a second and the irresponsibility overtakes you. It’s really a tricky thing.

  I just fooled around playing games, fell asleep reading complicated books, read Taiga history manga with jaw agape... I was in a really self-indulgent place around the end of December. As a result, when I started this volume, it was really hard to get in the groove! “How do you even write? I forget!” That’s about how I was feeling. It’s like when a pitcher skips practice; you start losing your “stuff” in no time flat. It wasn’t good. I’m very sorry. (Though in fact, I feel like I’ve been in this cycle for close to 20 years now!)

  Now, let’s get to the story.

  Volumes two through five were mainly short stories, so this time, I decided to do a long-form story mainly about Seiya-kun, like the first volume. When he’s the main character, everything gets really serious. It gets tiring to only ever focus on that, so volume seven will be back to short, silly stories, I think. ...And really, that’s the stuff I want to do more of!

  It seems there has been more secret development(?) in the various relationships, but I wonder how it’ll all turn out. I haven’t actually decided yet. Send your requests to Fujimi Shobo!

  By the way, the pirate Ironbeard and the shark Jaw who show up at the start were original characters from episode seven of the anime adaptation. I don’t know if it was a coincidence or not, but Tanaka Masahiko-san, who played Gauron in the Full Metal Panic! anime played Ironbeard, and Miki Shinichiro who played Kurz Weber played Jaw. If you haven’t watched it yet, do it! It’s funny!

  Oh, right. Speaking of the anime, it’s just been a short three months since it ended. I’m relieved that it was so well received. It’s great! Incidentally, the anime develops and ends differently than the books. I was grateful to be able to write situations and lines that I didn’t put into the original story (I actually wrote the script for episode 12). When I was writing volume one, I didn’t really think much about how Latifah really felt, but thanks to Director Takemoto and the rest of the staff, I’ve been able to add a lot of depth. I’m honored and grateful. A lot of things here in volume six also occurred to me while I was working on the anime. When you’re working with a unique setting that has so many characters, there are limits to how many things a single creator can come up with. So I got lots of visuals, sounds, music, and other things from the anime adaptation. What a life! I’d better work hard or I’ll wreak some divine punishment.

  Hmm, I guess I have about two pages left.

  Let me write about my current situation. I bought a PS4 at the end of the year. I like how fast it boots up. I’ve been playing Watch Dogs, GTA5, and Shadow of Mordor.

  Watch Dogs is a sandbox game where the protagonist walks around looking at his smartphone, causing trouble for passersby. It’s hilarious. GTA5 is awesome because the character Trevor is so obsessive. Scooter brothers! Shadow of Mordor is a game based on Lord of the Rings. I use my Celebrimbor stand and slay orcs and climb the ladder. The phrase “Celebrimbor stand” might not mean anything to fans of the books, but it’s really fun, so I recommend it.

  I was playing three games that all have a ton of content, so people are starting to get mad at me: “Stop playing around! Do some work!” and that’s... probably for the best. It’s all in the past (I say, suddenly defiant).

  And then... let’s see. I went to the supermarket yesterday and they were selling sake made from Kubota manju (very rare), but it was 20,000 yen, so I didn’t buy it. I think I’ve gotten a crush on the counter girl at the coffee shop I visit regularly, so I listen in on her conversations and end up not focusing on my manuscript. My desktop PC broke (it’s probably the video card dying) and I can’t work up the energy to fix it, so I’ve just let it sit there for over two months.

  That’s about all there’s been. Really, it’s all pretty pointless stuff. Sorry.

  Anyway, I’m going to work hard on volume seven. ...Well, it’ll be more a series of silly anecdotes, rather than a heavy story I need to work hard on. Bye!

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  Copyright

  Amagi Brilliant Park: Volume 6

  by Shouji Gatou

  Translated by Elizabeth Ellis

  Edited by Dana Allen

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

  Copyright © Shouji Gatou, Yuka Nakajima 2015

  Illustrations by Yuka Nakajima

  First published in Japan in 2015 by KADOKAWA CORPORATION, Tokyo

  English translation rights arranged with KADOKAWA CORPORATION, Tokyo

  All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property.

  J-Novel Club LLC

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  The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher.

  Ebook edition 1.0: July 2019