Frost

by Elise Faber

  "I think you already know the answer to that."

  I do. I don't want to think about it, but I do. If I were a ghost, holding on to life, I sure as hell wouldn't go quietly. If I didn't go with my reaper, there had to be a reason, right? There had to be something I held on for, and I'd be damned if I left earth without finishing it.

  I ask the question I don't want to ask. "Does Jessica know she's dead?"

  Jodi gets very still for a moment before running her finger over my chest again. It tickles in a good way.

  Her fingernail is sharp though. It scratches a little. I don't mind that much. It's nice to lie here like this.

  "Jessica… I'm not sure. I don't know what she knows."

  "You have to have a theory, though, don't you? I thought that's what you hunters do, have theories."

  Jodi takes a deep breath. Her chest pushes against my side, making me have to hold in a moan. I'm not a teenage boy. I'm a grown man. I shouldn't have to fight those urges. It's been a long time, though, and like I said, I am a man.

  "My theory is that, yeah, she knows she's dead. I think she's pissed. That's why she goes after the women."

  "Because they are in bed with men?"

  "Because they are in bed with you," Jodi corrects.

  My eyes open and find hers. "That makes no sense."

  She sighs and bites her lip. "Think about it. Jessica loves you. You were supposed to come here with her. You were…"

  "No." I stop her.

  "No?"

  I shake my head. My heart starts to beat a little faster, but I try to control it. "No, I wasn't supposed to come here… not with her. I was supposed to meet her here. I wasn't with her in the car… during the accident…"

  I squeeze her hand. She screams.

  Jodi squeezes her eyes shut as if she's said something she shouldn't have. It's not really that big of a deal. I can see how she could get mixed up thinking that, but if I had been in the car with Jessica, I sure as hell wouldn't be here now. That thing was totaled. Sort of what happens when you cross the median and hit a semi — or so I hear. "Right… I'm sorry. I misspoke. Um… I think Jessica thinks the men are you. And she attacks the women because she thinks they are making you cheat on her."

  "Then after she goes after them, she sexually attacks the men?"

  "In a manner of speaking," Jodi says. I can feel the tension filling her. It is bouncing off her like waves. I know there is something I'm missing. Something I'm supposed to know.

  "Jodi," I say. I need to ask. I need to know what in the world she is hiding from me. Before I can, I look down and see my white t-shirt… covered in strange drawings.

  "I'm so sorry," she says.

  CHAPTER NINE

  All Hell Breaks Loose

  I push Jodi away from me and roll out of bed. Symbols. She's written symbols on my chest. Swirls and signs and things I don't understand. Except I know they are symbols, and I know I don't want them on me. I start to take my shirt off when she stops me…

  "Don't! Don't take them off. They are for your protection." Jodi's standing on her side of the bed. A Sharpie marker is in her hand. That's what I felt. I'm an idiot. A stupid, freaking idiot.

  "For my protection?" I scoff. "My protection from what? From you? From Jessica? What?"

  "From… things."

  I roll my eyes.

  "Look, I get it. I wish I could explain it all, but I can't. Okay? You are just going to have to trust me. I promise. It will all make sense soon."

  "Why should I trust anything you say? It's not like you are forthcoming with the information." I should walk out the door. Nothing is stopping me. I need to leave and get away from all the craziness in this room, but I don't. I stand there like an idiot and listen to Jodi. I'm not sure why either. I just do. Because I do.

  "I'll tell you when the time is right. I promise you."

  "Tell me now." I cross my arms over my chest, hating that I didn't pull the shirt off to start with. I should have.

  "No. I can't."

  "Jodi."

  "Trust me."

  How many times can she tell me to trust her? She has given me no reason to trust her. None.

  "I'm done with this." I rip my shirt over my head and toss it at her. The good part? The shirt is gone. The bad? The ink has bled through the shirt and tattooed my skin. "You knew this would happen." It's not a question.

  "I didn't… It's for your protection. I swear."

  "My protection? Didn't you say that Jessica would go after you? Why not put symbols on yourself?" I'm yelling. I don't care if Higgins comes back. He can stay with Jodi for all I care. I'm done!

  "I already have them. See?" She pulls her shirt up over her stomach. Sure enough. Black tattoos sort of like I have on my shirt… and now on my chest and stomach.

  "Why didn't you tell me what you were doing? I would have let you."

  "I couldn't take that chance. You've been acting strange all night, and I didn't know if you'd let me. I thought you might bolt." She seems sincere.

  I don't care. I'm beyond mad. Way beyond. The veil is coming back down, and all I can see on the outside of my vision is red. "I've been acting strange? Me… ME!?" I slam my fist against the wall. Droplets of blood drip down my knuckles. I don't feel the pain.

  Jodi backs up. Good girl. She should.

  I have no idea what I might do to her. I don't want to hurt her. I don't, but this rage I have inside me… who says I might not snap…

  I grab her wrist… feel it snap… and she screams.

  "You've been the one acting strange, Jodi. All the secret texts to Gabe. The cryptic things you've been saying. The way you acted before… when I had you against the wall… when you were talking to Higgins…"

  Then it hits me. I can't believe I never picked up on it before. I mean, I did, but I totally let it go. I'm a moron. A total and complete moron. "You called him Gabe." Tears, angry tears, sting my eyes. I'll be damned if I let them fall. "You called Higgins Gabe… He's in on this too, isn't he?"

  She doesn't answer.

  I slam my palm against the wall. The neighbors can screw it. "Isn't he!"

  Jodi's chest puffs up, and her chin sticks out like she's trying to be all big and brave. I have news for her. She's not. I thought she was, but she's not. Being brave means telling the truth. It means that you have someone's back even when they don't know it. It means trust. This girl, she has none of those things.

  "Yeah," she says weakly, "he is."

  I stand there staring at her, not sure what to say. I can't believe she actually admitted it, to start with. I expected some sort of “No, you're wrong. You are crazy” from her. Not this.

  "Jessica will be here soon. In minutes…" Jodi goes on. "…and you can be mad at me all you want. It's your right. I get it. But you can't be mad at me when she's here, or it won't work."

  "What. Happens?" I grit through my teeth. "What are you going to do to her?"

  Jodi doesn't answer, not as quickly as I want.

  I throw up my hands, grab my coat, and take off for the door.

  "You can't leave!" she yells at me.

  "The hell I can't," I say. I reach for the door when something stops me.

  Like an invisible force field I can't break.

  I look down. I'm at the salt line.

  Slowly, carefully, I turn toward Jodi who hasn't moved a muscle. "What the hell?"

  She opens her mouth to answer, and then she's gone. Thrown back against the wall. The lamp breaks at the impact, and Jodi falls to the floor with a moan.

  I yell her name and run toward her, apparently forgetting that, not two seconds ago, I wanted to throttle her.

  Blood is running down her nose. She groans when I roll her over and see the blood soaking her back. So this is it… It's time.

  "Will?" I stand when I hear her. Her sweet voice that I never thought I'd actually ever hear again. Standing next to the bathroom door is my wife. She's wearing a white dress. The same one she wore the night she died.
<
br />   A woman in white.

  Jodi says something. I don't even listen. I smile at my wife. I'm finally home.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Let the Right One In

  I smile at her.

  But she doesn't smile at me.

  Jessica looks pissed.

  Her hair, that beautiful blond hair that I've loved so much, that I've thought about so often in the last five years, is bloody and matted, stuck all over her head. Blood is running down her mouth. Her arm is at a crooked angle, as is her neck. Her left wrist is hanging lifeless — obviously broken.

  Jessica Jenkins. My wife. A broken, bloodied, vengeful spirit.

  I can't believe this is my life.

  "What happened to you?" I ask before I think better of it. I don't want to tick her off. I'm afraid she'll disappear, and I have to talk to her. I have to tell her something while I still can. And I don't want her to attack Jodi. Yeah, Jodi lied to me. She kept things from me. That doesn't mean I want Jessica to hurt her. I don't want her to hurt anyone.

  Neither do I.

  Jessica blinks as if she is an image on a television screen trying to stay in frequency. With a sneer, she walks toward me with spastic movements, coming and going in my vision. She stops a few feet away. "You," she growls.

  My heart sinks.

  Me? She thinks I did something to her.

  "Jessica," I plead with her, reach for her. I have to make her understand. I know she isn't exactly my wife. I know she's been trapped here for a while, but I have to make her see that this isn't the way to go about things. I need her to see that she needs to move on. We both — we both need to move on. "Jessica, hear me out. We need to talk."

  Next thing I know, I'm against the headboard of the bed. My arms feels like they are tied to the gray metal frame, but nothing — nothing physical — is holding them down. I watch as Jessica stalks toward Jodi, who is backing away with her gun trained on my wife. "Don't do this, Jess. Don't. She's not done anything to you. She's here to help you."

  That makes hers stop. She looks at me, her dead eyes black and cold. "Help me? How can your whore help me?"

  "Not my whore. Not my anything. I swear, Jess. She's just here to help. To help you move on!" I want her to listen to me. I want to pull her close and tell her everything is okay. I know what she looks like. I know what she is. I still need her, though. I still need her to understand.

  "I bet she does. I bet she wants me to move on so she can have you — all to herself."

  In the next moment, Jodi is up in her air. Her toes are barely scraping the floor, and she's holding her neck as if she's being choked. Her gun thuds on the floor.

  Jessica looks happy. Content, even. Her arms are outstretched toward Jodi, her hands in a cupping motion. Squeezing. A smile curls on her mangled lips.

  "Leave her alone!"

  She doesn't move. Jodi is turning red. She'll be dead in no time. I can't let that happen. I can't. No matter what. This is my fight. Jess is my responsibility.

  "She did this to herself," Jess grumbles, squeezing her hand tighter.

  Jodi gags. Her eyes meet mine, then flash over my head toward the corner of the room.

  I look in the same direction and see it. A video camera. What the…

  "Jodi!" Higgins pounds on the door.

  Higgins.

  Gabe.

  He's been watching us the entire time.

  More secrets.

  More lies.

  No matter what, even though I don't exactly know what's going on, I have to stop it. I know it isn't real. The things I feel holding me down, they aren't real. I can fight it. If I believe enough, if I acknowledge that it isn't real, I can get away. I can save the girl.

  Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes and block everything out. Jess's moaning. Jodi's gasping. Higgins' pounding on the door. I block it all. I focus on my hands. Focus on being free.

  Focus.

  I'm no longer on the bed. I'm standing between my wife and Jodi. The surprise on Jess' face probably matches mine. I don't know how I did it, but I did. Not going to ask any questions about that. "Let. Her. Go," I order and hold the gun, the gun I found in my hand, up at her.

  I never wanted this to happen. This is my wife. I promised to protect her. I never wanted this.

  Jess looks at the gun and stumbles back. "You'd do it, wouldn't you? You'd hurt me."

  "I wouldn't mean to…" I say. The gun shakes in my hand. "…but I have to protect her. From you."

  She scoffs. "From me? What about you? Do you think you are innocent in all this?"

  I shake my head. "I know I'm not."

  "You have no idea." In a flash, Jess releases Jodi who falls to the ground behind me with a thud. I hear her yell at Higgins to not come in. He'll break the salt line. We need the salt line so they don't get away.

  They.

  Jessica is in front of me. She grabs for the gun, or I think she is. I'm too late pulling the trigger, but it doesn't matter. Turns out, she didn’t want the gun. She wanted my hand. As soon as her cold fingers touch mine, my head feels like it is going to explode…

  I'm in the car.

  We are driving to the hotel. Hotel Toujours.

  It is our five-year anniversary, but I'm not happy.

  I can't remember why. All I feel is rage. I'm driving. She's in white.

  The radio is playing.

  She's crying.

  I'd think that her crying would make me sad. That I'd want to take care of her, make her stop.

  Instead, it makes me angrier. It's our anniversary. A happy time, right? So why is she crying? I don't know. I don't remember. I don't care.

  All I know is that she is.

  It is snowing. A white Christmas, I guess. I'm speeding. I figure the faster I go, the faster I can get to the hotel. The faster I can get out of the car with her. This is her idea anyway. Go to New Orleans. Go to this magical mystery hotel. They say it can make anything come true. I know what she is going for. I remember now… She wants a baby. We tried for years… and nothing. I think she blames me. I blame me. We've tried treatments and doctors and money… lots of money. She's heard of this hotel that if you find the right room, you can get your wishes granted.

  She's desperate.

  I'm tired of fighting over it.

  So I go.

  We are flying down the two-lane road, water pooling all around us. She's crying. I'm mad. She reaches for my arm.

  "Because I need you to hold me," Jess says.

  I think she's trying to stop me, so I grab her hand.

  I'm angrier, stronger than I thought, and I hear the bone snap.

  I've hurt her. Oh God, I've hurt her. I didn't mean to. I didn't want to. It's the red… I can't control it.

  She screams.

  "I'm so…"

  I see headlights.

  I've gone over the median…

  I don't remember the impact.

  I wake up back home.

  It was all a dream.

  It wasn't a dream.

  Jess lets me go, and I stumble backward. Jodi has climbed up in the little chair next to the window. She now has the gun. How she got it… I'm not sure. I don't want to know. I don't want to know any of this…

  "The accident," I say to no one in particular. I remember. I remember…

  "It wasn't an accident," Jess says. She flickers out then reappears close to the television. "We were supposed to come here. So I did. I came here. I waited for you! I waited so long!"

  "I know…" The words don't sound like mine. They don't sound like they are coming from my mouth. Everything is an echo. It is hurting my ears.

  Jodi is talking behind me. I don't understand what she's saying. It doesn't seem to be English.

  "Then when you did come, you brought your whores. You taunted me with them. Sleeping with them. I tried at first to make you see me. I couldn't understand why you couldn't. But you never could. So I kept getting angrier and angrier. I was here. So I hurt them. I hurt them to get the
m away from you."

  "I know," I say. I get it. She thought those men were me. She thought I was cheating on her. What I don't get is why she would care. "But, baby, I hurt you." I can barely get the words out. "I never thought I could. Ever. But I did. I broke your wrist. I broke your heart. Why would you ever want to see me again? Why would you want me with you?"

  "We were supposed to be here." She sounds like an echo. "We were supposed to be happy. I had something to tell you. Something I never got to tell you."

  I try really hard to think. I need to remember. It feels like I should remember. "I woke up at home. You weren't there."

  "I came here. It was where we were supposed to be."

  Deep down, I get it. I understand, even if I can't fully wrap my brain around it. I turn toward Jodi. I have a feeling she can tell me what's going on. She's sitting in the chair. Her hand is up to her throat, rubbing the bruises Jess gave her. I'm so sorry about that. It's all my fault.

  "I woke up at home," I tell her. I know what that means, or I think I do. But man, I don't want to think about it.

  Jodi bites her lip. "Five years ago, Will and Jessica Jenkins died in a car crash on U.S. Highway 90. Head-on collision. The other driver survived. Barely."

  "I'm not dead." My words are barely above a whisper. I don't know who I'm trying to convince more. Her or me?

  "About a year after your death, a family named Michaels bought your house. They reported ghostly activity right away. Little things. Lights flickering. Bumps in the night. Things like that. Nothing major… until about a year ago. Things started to pick up. The spirit got more… violent. More vengeful. It went after the wife the most… scratching her eyes. Pulling her hair. Hurting her… until the family couldn't take it anymore. They called me."

  I sink down to the bed, trying to let the words sink in. "No, I'm not dead. I remember. I went home. I did what I do every day. I didn't go to work because…" Why didn’t I go to work? I guess I never tried. "I stayed home because I couldn't find the energy to leave. I just wanted to stay there. Mourn my wife. These rages came over me, though. And I'd black out. I told you about that…"

  Jodi nods. "Those, I'm assuming, are the times you went after Mrs. Michaels."