"As much as I could. Not as much as I'd have liked." An odd, almost sad expression crossed Stephen's face. "Meagan's great. She deserves more than what she's had in life."
Cole studied Stephen. "You aim to give it to her?"
Stephen shrugged. "I would if I could."
Cole felt tension between his shoulder blades as Stephen averted his gaze and stared down at his boots. "It's time Meagan found someone to rely on, someone who will be there for her no matter what."
Cole considered his brothers words. Meagan was always happy to see Stephen. She never jerked from him when he touched her or frowned when he entered the room. "Do you plan to be that someone, Stephen?"
A strange expression flickered across Stephen's features. Before Cole could interpret it, he masked it with a smile that never reached his eyes. "I don't think that's ever been an option, Cole."
Stephen approached Meagan, who grinned at him with pleasure. He swiped several slices of bacon from the plate she'd just set on the table.
"Stephen," Meagan threatened, her stern voice laced with laughter, "you return that food immediately." She swatted at him with a spoon, doubling over in mirth as Stephen defended himself with a limp slice of bacon, which swung through the air toward her.
"Have pity, Meagan. A man has to eat."
Meagan placed her hands on her hips. "Then sit down, and eat properly."
"I did sit and eat properly through some of the worst meals of my life," Stephen reminded Meagan. "All in the hopes of keeping you happy."
Glee danced in Meagan's eyes. "Don't you dare use that silly pretense as an excuse for your rude behavior," Meagan warned.
"Silly pretense!" Stephen rubbed his stomach. "I just about died of malnutrition." As quick as lightening he reached around her and grabbed a biscuit, then rushed toward the door. He spun, took a huge bite from the biscuit, grinned with his mouth full, then disappeared outside.
Laughter followed his exit, and Meagan's eyes sparkled as she turned toward the children.
"What are you all giggling about?"
Cole forced his doubts about Stephen and Meagan aside and enjoyed the scene before him. Smiles filled the faces of the children, and Meagan was rewarded by the sound of laughter as she teased the children.
"Okay, okay," Meagan clapped her hands together. "I want you all to go outside and play." She tickled one child then mussed the hair of another as she guided them out the door.
Cole watched them leave. Jeremy was the last in line. "Jeremy."
The boy turned.
"I want to ask a favor of you."
Jeremy nodded, his eyes wide.
"I want you to make sure that none of your brothers or sisters wander far from the house. You either."
"I'll watch em'," he promised, his expression never more serious.
"Good boy." Cole waited until Jeremy disappeared, then grabbed the last of the bacon and biscuits before Meagan cleared the plates from the table. He could hear Jeremy issuing orders to his siblings already.
Meagan shook her head as a tiny smile played on her lips. "Jeremy's taking his new responsibility very seriously." She sat down and leaned her cheek on the back of her hand. Her smile faded. "What happened last night, with his pa?"
"I lost my cool."
An impish grin tipped the corners of Meagan's lips. "Imagine that."
Cole ran his fingers through his hair. "You should have seen them, Meagan. The younger children stared at me as if I were a monster. When I confronted Matt, they tried to defend him.
"He's their father."
Cole paced the room as visions of what he'd witnessed flashed through his mind. "Matt was drunk, Meagan. He could barely stand long enough to hear me out. He stunk so bad the entire room reeked with his odor."
Cole slammed his clenched fist into the wall. "Damn." He plopped into a nearby chair and buried his head in his hands. "I should have done something sooner."
"You didn't know it was that bad, Cole."
"I should have." Cole felt Meagan's hand on his shoulder. "Those children have suffered day after day and I've let it happen."
Meagan knelt until her face was even with his. "Cole, Matt is an adult, and those children are his. He's the one responsible for their pain, not you."
"If I'd paid more attention, I could have helped them."
Meagan's eyes looked deep into his. "We can't change our past, Cole, only learn from it."
Cole relished the smooth softness of her skin as he ran his finger along her cheek. His eyes never wavered from hers. "You're good for me, Meagan. Do you know that?"
Meagan lowered her gaze. "I know." Warmth flooded her gaze as she once again met his stare. "I think we're good for each other."
Cole relaxed. "Me too."
A door slammed. "Meagan, Amy says I'm not her boss and she won't listen to me."
Cole watched as Meagan stood and attended to Jeremy, who looked rather put out by his new responsibilities. She turned to Cole, her disposition all business.
Cole smothered his disappointment at the missed moment. There was much to do and no time like the present to get it done. "I think it's time we got the children cleaned up,” he suggested.
Meagan nodded. “I'll take the girls, you take the boys."
Cole was about to protest the unfairness of the ratio's, but reconsidered. Meagan couldn't help with the boys, so he'd have to take all six of them himself. "Okay. I'll set the tub up in your room then we’ll head to the creek.”
Meagan was in the process of boiling water when Amy entered the room. "Cole sent us in here to take a bath, with real hot water and everything. Can I go first? Can I?"
Meagan was pleased, and a bit surprised by Amy's excitement. From the looks of the child one wouldn't suspect she'd be enthused to bathe. "Absolutely." Meagan filled the tub and watched as Amy stripped and slid into it.
"Here's some soap." Meagan handed the bar to the child. "I want you to scrub real hard."
Meagan watched as Amy obeyed, then bent to help her with her hair. Sarah slipped into the room and sat on the edge of the bed. She didn't say a single word.
Meagan rinsed Amy's hair amidst laughter and giggles. Meagan recalled Amy's wide grin and teasing ways this morning at breakfast. She seemed to have little concern at being separated from her pa. "Okay, Amy. You're done."
"Can't I stay a little bit longer? Please?"
Meagan grinned down at the soaked child. "I'm sorry, Amy, but both Sarah and I still need to bathe. We don't want freezing water."
Amy giggled and stood up. Meagan ran a towel across her.
"I can do it myself." Amy declared as she grabbed the towel away.
"I'll bet you can." Meagan marveled at the differences between the children. Jeremy was quiet yet full of energy. Amy was outgoing. Sarah seemed painfully shy.
"I'm all dry."
Meagan nodded her approval. "You look much better, Amy." Meagan walked to the dresser, picked up a comb and handed it to her. "Now, comb your hair, then we'll get you dressed." Meagan realized with a sinking feeling that the children would have to wear their dirty clothes. She had no others to offer them. She watched Sarah tug at her tangled strands. "Do you want some help?"
"I know how to do it," Sarah declared with all the confidence of a ten year old. "I can braid it and everything."
Meagan watched Amy do exactly as she'd claimed. Her braids weren't quite even, but they'd do. She helped her dress.
“Can I go play now?” Amy pleaded.
“As long as you stay close to the house and don’t get dirty again,” Meagan agreed, waiting until Amy disappeared from the room before turning to Sarah. "Should I go next?"
Sarah nodded. "Please, do."
Meagan began to wonder if Sarah was going to prove the most difficult of the children. Meagan slipped off her clothes and slid into the water. Instead of taking the time to soak, as she normally would, Meagan wet her hair and lathered it with soap.
"Sarah, do me a favor and bring some fresh wate
r from the stove for a rinse."
Sarah exited the room without a word. She returned several minutes later with a bucket of steaming water.
Meagan rinsed her hair and wrung the excess water from the thick mass. Quickly drying off, she dressed then turned to face Sarah. "Your turn. I'm going to get some fresh water. Why don't you get started."
Meagan allowed Sarah a few minutes of privacy before she entered the room with a bucket of steaming water. Meagan was relieved to see Sarah in the tub. "This should warm your water." Meagan tilted the bucket, watching the steam rise as she mixed the fresh water with the old.
"Oh, goodness," Sarah exclaimed as a bit of the hot water splashed on her bare skin. "That's hot."
Meagan smothered a gasp of surprise as Sarah popped up from the water. Sarah was not a child, but a woman. "How old are you, Sarah?" Meagan asked bluntly.
"Nineteen," Sarah admitted with obvious reluctance.
Meagan grinned. “I thought you were several years younger than me, yet you’re actually older."
"Most everyone thinks I'm younger than I am," Sarah admitted.
Meagan scrubbed Sarah's hair as she chatted. "It's going to be fun, having you around. I've been isolated from women folk. The southeast side of the ranch was too far away for most people to visit."
"I never left the house much at all, so I don't know many people around these parts, either."
"Why didn't you? Leave the house, I mean? "
"Couldn't. Someone had to take care of the others, and being the oldest, I guess I was the only one to do it."
"What about your pa."
Sarah ducked under the water to rinse the suds away. Once she resurfaced Meagan used the remaining water from the bucket as a final rinse.
"Things changed after ma died." Sarah exited the tub, wrapped herself in a towel and accepted the comb Meagan offered. "I guess I don't really like talking about it much. Never really have talked to anyone about it before."
"I think it's high time you did, Sarah. Everyone needs someone to confide in." Meagan grinned. "I used to confide in my horse, Angel."
"Your horse?"
"Aha." Meagan grinned at Sarah's wide eyed stare. "I always figured that, no matter what I told her, she wouldn't tell a single soul about it." Meagan sobered. "I wouldn't tell either, Sarah. Honest."
Sarah lowered her eyes and stared at her feet. "It was terrible, when ma died. Pa blamed Jeremy. He was angry, real angry. That night was the first night I ever saw my pa drunk."
Meagan wanted to reach out to Sarah, but held back, not knowing her well enough to know how she'd react. "How could your pa blame Jeremy? He was just a baby."
"I don't know why, but I know Pa hurt more than any man should. He loved ma something fierce. When she died, he just quit caring, about himself, and about us."
"I can't believe that," Meagan protested. "If he loved you so much once, he still must."
"He wouldn't even look at us for a long time." A sad, haunted smile filled Sarah's brown eyes. "He used to laugh a lot, and tease us. He worked hard, harder than most men. He had nothing but good to say of the McAllister's after they took him on." Sarah shrugged. "I was lucky, I guess. I remember him the way he was. Some of the younger ones don't, and most don't remember ma at all." Absently combing the tangles from her hair, Sarah stated sadly, "Jeremy's had it the worst."
"How old is Jeremy?"
"He'll be seven in July."
Seven years, Meagan thought. Those poor children had been living this way for seven years. "Why were you so against me taking Jeremy on that picnic?"
"Pa hit Jeremy the night before. I didn't want you to find out."
"Why in heavens name not?" Meagan stood and paced the room, upset with Sarah. "Someone needed to find out, and to help him."
"You don't understand."
Sarah's expression stopped Meagan dead in her tracks. The last thing Sarah needed right now was a chewing out. With a sigh, she sat back on the bed. "What did Jeremy do?"
"Nothing. Jeremy never does anything wrong when pa hits him. Pa just gets in that mood."
"Surely you can see how wrong that is, Sarah."
"Of course I can."
"Then why didn't you want anyone to know about it."
"What then?"
Sarah's troubled eyes stared directly into hers, and Meagan saw the anguish and the wisdom in their depths. "I don't know exactly what," Meagan confessed, "but surely now that Cole knows what's been happening, things will get better."
"Pa has eight kids." Sarah stated the fact as if it answered everything. "I'm old enough to be on my own, but they're not. What do you think is going to happen to us all now?"
"I'm sure Cole will think of something."
"What, Meagan?" Sarah laid the brush on the bed and twisted her hands together in her lap. "We live in desolate country. Most of the ranches are a days ride, or more, apart. Even if Cole finds families that want us, we won't be close enough to visit each other."
"Well, maybe he'll find someone who wants you all."
"Oh, Meagan, that will never happen. You know it, and I know it." Sarah's eyes filled with tears. "All I know is, where we were, we had each other. Now, we can't even be certain we'll have that."
Meagan couldn't believe her interference might have harmed the children's future. "But the children will be happier here. They're already smiling more, and laughing."
"We can't stay here forever, Meagan."
It was true. There was no chance that the children could all live here. "Maybe your pa will sober up, once he realizes he can't get his children back until he does."
"I've prayed for that for years." Sarah stood, the golden flints in her eyes shining with unreleased emotion. "I'm done praying, Meagan." Her hands twitched in agitation. "Once the McAllister's discover my age, they'll have no reason to keep me around. I'm just an unnecessary mouth to feed."
"We're not so different, you and I," Meagan stated as she lowered herself onto her back and stared at the ceiling. She realized Sarah had intentionally tried to appear younger, to protect her siblings. "I'm too old to be hanging around this place, too. I have nowhere else to go, and the McAllister's have taken me in without a time limit." Meagan sat up and stated with conviction. "No one is going to kick you out, Sarah. I know it."
"It's different with you, Meagan."
Curiosity filled Meagan. "How so?"
"Cole likes you. He wants you to stay."
Meagan rose from the bed in a flash. "What!"
"It's obvious," Sarah stated.
"I really don't think.."
"It's also obvious how you feel about him."
That silenced Meagan. If Sarah knew how she felt, surely everyone else realized it as well. Meagan didn't bother to deny her feelings. "It doesn't matter if Cole wants me around or not, Sarah, I know him well enough to know he won't separate you from your brothers and sisters."
"Maybe, Meagan. We'll see." Sarah picked up her dress and was about to slip into it.
"Wait." Meagan critically analyzed Sarah's form. She was perfect. "I have something for you." Meagan reached into the closet and pulled out a pale blue skirt, made fuller by the looping of extra fabric at the waist. A matching jacket with a deep v-shaped neckline and shorter Basque, which was trimmed with a decorative ivory lace frill accompanied the skirt. "What do you think of this?"
Sarah eyed the dress with obvious excitement. "It's lovely."
"Try it on."
Startled eyes stared up at Meagan. "What?"
"I said, try it on. It should fit you perfectly."
"Meagan, you’re crazy. I couldn't wear a dress like that."
Meagan arched her brow Sarah's way, "why not?"
"Well, first of all I wouldn't know how to move in it. Secondly, everyone would know I'm older, and..."
"Sarah, stop worrying about that." Meagan held the dress up for her. "Put it on. Let's at least see how it fits."
"I can't."
"You can," Meagan declared firmly, "
and you will. I can't wait to see you in it."
"Oh," Sarah trounced her bare feet gracefully on the floor as she considered Megan's request. "I guess I can at least try it on."
Meagan wisely held silent, but couldn't hold back a wide grin as the dress buttoned up without a hitch. "See, it fits as if it were made for you."
Sarah twirled in front of the mirror. "I'm actually kind of pretty."
"You're more than pretty," Meagan assured. "You look fantastic." Meagan's enthusiasm grew. "Let's fix your hair."
"Oh," Sarah reached up and touched the golden brown strands. "I never wear my hair any other way but in a braid."
"It's time you did."
Sarah eyed her warily. "You're kind of bossy, aren't you?"
Meagan grinned from ear to ear. "I'm going to take that as a compliment. Now, come over here."
She worked fast, and ten minutes later Sarah stood before her, looking like a princess from a story book. Her golden brown hair was piled atop her head, with small ringlets falling around her face, softening her features. Her cheeks were flushed with pleasure, and her brown eyes glowed with a warmth that came from a new found confidence.
"I've never done much with hair before," Meagan confessed, "but, if I do say so myself, I've done a wonderful job."
"I just can't believe it's me."
Knowing Sarah would stand there and admire herself all day if she didn't do something, Meagan stated, "let's go."
"Go where?"
"To help Cole. I'm sure he has his hands full .
Sarah self-consciously straightened her dress as she followed Meagan from the room. She raised nervous hands to her perfectly styled hair. She was going to meet the McAllister brothers for the first time as a lady. She hoped to make a good impression. She glanced down to be sure everything was in place, and nearly lost her balance as she hit a solid barrier. Gasping, she was surprised when strong arms closed around her. Looking up, she realized the barrier was Stephen, and he was holding her.
A deep flush heated her cheeks as she murmured a quick apology and backed away. She headed straight outside, mortified beyond repair. That wasn't the kind of impression she'd hoped to make.
Stephen watched the enticing sway of hips as the woman walked away, and turned toward Meagan. "Who was that?"
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