Truly Madly Famously

by Rebecca Serle

  “I don’t want to lose this.”

  “Cost of doing business, kid. Right now the price is getting your cute tush to the airport on time.”

  We hang up, and Cassandra stirs. “What’s going on?” she asks. She rolls over and looks at the clock. “It’s eight AM.”

  “I know,” I whisper. “But I have to go back to L.A. today.”

  Cassandra sits up. She rubs her eyes. “Today? But you have another week here. We were going to do Nob Hill.”

  I come to sit down next to her. “I know, but I have to meet with the new director.”

  “This blows.”

  I nod. Jake snorts in the club chair, but his eyes don’t open.

  “Romance,” Cassandra says.

  “Hey, you ended up in bed with me.”

  She smiles a slow, sleepy smile. “I just got you back,” she says.

  “I know. Can you come visit?”

  “Yeah, but Jake’s not invited this time. Girls’ trip.”

  “Definitely. And we still have Mexico,” I point out.

  Cassandra peels the covers down and stretches. “I’ll understand if you can’t make it.”

  “No way. I promise, I’ll be there. The movie can wait.” But even as I say it, we both know it’s not true. The movie can’t wait. I can’t make those kinds of promises. Not now. Maybe not anymore.

  Cassandra puts both of her hands on my shoulders. “Listen,” she says. “I know we are living crazy different lives. And they’re just going to get more different. But don’t ever think that just because I don’t know what it’s like that I can’t understand.”

  I pull her in for a hug, but she bounds off the bed. “Brush your teeth,” she says. She crouches down next to Jake and kisses his cheek. “Rise and shine.”

  Jake stirs and murmurs something. “You have a protest in the Pearl in forty-five minutes, hot stuff,” she says. “That community garden is not going to save itself.”

  Jake bolts upright. He rolls his neck and then stands and grabs Cassandra’s hand. “We have to move,” he says. “See ya, Pat.”

  I toss Cassandra’s dress at her. She’s wearing an old pair of boxer shorts and a T-shirt of mine. “Love you!” she calls over her shoulder.

  I get dressed and go downstairs. Joanna and Bill left last night. My mom and dad are in the kitchen, sipping coffee.

  “Hey,” I say.

  My mom looks up at me and winces. “Lower your voice,” she says.

  “Your mother is experiencing her second hangover in twenty-five years,” my dad says, standing up and giving me his seat. “So you’ll forgive her cheery attitude.”

  My mom smiles weakly at me.

  “It was a great night,” I tell her. “You did an amazing job.”

  She lifts a hand to her temple. “I think they liked it.”

  My dad hands me a cup of coffee and kisses my mom on the head. “They loved it,” he says.

  “I have bad news,” I say.

  Both parents look at me. “I have to go back to L.A. this afternoon to meet with Alfonso. I just spoke to Sandy.”

  My mother nods. “I know—she called us.”

  “What?”

  “Sandy used her telephone to call our telephone.” My mother pantomimes. “Jeff, is it one hundred degrees in here, or is it just me?”

  My father chuckles and takes off, presumably in pursuit of the thermostat or some ice water.

  “She calls you?”

  “Of course she calls me,” my mom says. “I’m your mother.”

  “I didn’t know.”

  My mom reaches out and gently grazes my cheek. “I know I said that stuff to you about coming home, but that’s just because sometimes I want you here, where I can protect you. It’s harder when you’re out there—” She gestures with her hand. “But I want you to know that just because I’m not there doesn’t mean I’m not doing what I can.” She taps my nose with her index finger. “No matter how far away you are, I’m still always your mother.”

  I don’t say anything; I just fold into her. “Ouch,” she says. “Watch the head.”

  I pull back and raise my eyebrow. “I’m guessing Dad is going to drive me?”

  My mom sits back and closes her eyes. “If he even so much as turns on that engine loudly, God help me, I’m getting a divorce.”

  Dad drops me off. “Take care of yourself,” he says.

  “I will.”

  “Don’t let anyone tell you who you are, okay? You know all of that. Your mother taught you.”

  I smile at him. “You didn’t do such a bad job, either.”

  “Maybe not,” he says, hugging me close.

  I wave good-bye as I go to check in. The airport is way less crowded than LAX, and I board in relative peace. A few camera phone pics, but at least I’m alone. I have on the baseball hat I found in the three musketeers box yesterday, and I pull it down over my eyes the way I’ve gotten used to.

  I sleep the whole way there. Cassandra kicks and Jake snores, so last night was a wash and I’m exhausted. I only wake up when I feel the wheels hit the runway.

  I go directly to meet with Alfonso the next morning. A car arrives to take me at eight AM. To my surprise and delight, Alexis is there when I get to the studio. She’s lounging in the office of one of the studio execs, Meredith.

  “Paige,” she says. “I’m sorry you got called back early.”

  “You too,” I say. “Was Georgina upset?” I think about their plans for upfronts.

  Alexis rolls her eyes. “She’s back in love with Blake; she barely noticed I was there, let alone that I left.” Alexis wraps her long arms around me. “Besides, I think you might need me right now more than she does.”

  “Hey, Paige.” Meredith waves from her desk. I let go of Alexis.

  “Hey, how’s it going?”

  Meredith sighs. “I’m getting exercise tips from Twiggy over here. So you can imagine.” She winks at me.

  “It really is all about the core,” Alexis says, employing a little more accent than usual and lifting up her sheer white tank top.

  “Please put those away,” I say. “I haven’t even had coffee yet.”

  “That part we can fix,” Meredith says. She calls in her assistant, who comes back five minutes later, juggling Starbucks cups.

  “Alfonso is waiting in the conference room,” she says.

  We take our cups and follow Meredith down the hall. She opens the door, and I see Alfonso and next to him, on either side, Jordan and Rainer.

  “Paige,” Alfonso says, rising and extending his hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you. Alexis, I don’t think I’ve seen you since the Mountain Rain days.”

  Alexis beams.

  “Please take a seat, ladies.”

  We sit. I can hear my heart hammering. This is work, I remind myself. Be a goddamn professional.

  “I’m glad we’re all here,” Alfonso says. “I always like to meet together before we go on location. Just to get a feel for each other.” Alfonso clasps his hands on the table. “I anticipate the dynamic being different on this film. We have a tight shoot. I just was telling the boys here”—he gestures on either side of him—“that we have less shooting days than we did for one, and more locations. So I’m really going to rely on you all to be present on set. Minimal distractions.”

  He doesn’t look at any of us when he says it, but the implication hangs in the air.

  Meredith is sitting next to us. “Alfonso was thinking that while we’re all here, we could do our first read-through.”

  I glance at Rainer. He looks up at me and gives me the slightest nod. “Sounds good to me,” he says. “I don’t have anywhere to be.”

  “Yeah, cool,” Jordan says.

  Meredith’s assistant passes out scripts, and then the two of them depart, leaving Jordan, Rainer, Alexis, and me alone with Alfonso.

  We start reading. I settle back into August immediately. Or maybe it’s not that I’m folding back into her—maybe it’s that I’m letting her
speak up. Maybe she’s always there now. I used to feel unworthy of this role. Becoming August was something that took time and effort and a belief in myself and my own abilities that I wasn’t sure I had. I used to think I didn’t understand her. I used to think it made no sense—this over-dramatization of her choice. She’s seventeen, for God’s sake. But sitting at the table with both of them, reading our parts, I can’t help but think that we’re acting out something more than our roles.

  Book two begins with August back home, with Ed. She’s trying to figure out how to let go of Noah. To live without him. Ed wants to win her back, Maggie is acting out, and August isn’t at all who she was when she left for the island.

  We’re doing this scene in August’s kitchen with Ed, August, and Maggie (Alexis). August begins to suspect that something might have happened with her boyfriend and her sister while she was on the island with Noah.

  “I’m going to be sick,” Alexis says. Maggie just caught Ed and August in the kitchen, kissing.

  “Ever heard of knocking?” I ask, flipping the page.

  Jordan makes a noise between a laugh and a snort. “Oh, come on,” he says. “I know for a fact your stomach isn’t that sensitive.”

  “If you’re referring to the taco incident, then I have no comment.” Alexis tosses Jordan a look.

  “The taco incident?” I ask.

  Jordan’s eyebrows knit together. “It was nothing,” he says.

  “Tell me,” I say to Alexis.

  “It wasn’t a big deal,” she says. “We just had some fun. You know, that thing we used to do before you—”

  “Before I what?”

  “Maggie…” Jordan’s voice carries a warning.

  “Before you came back and made him miserable again,” she says.

  Maggie is supposed to leave, and Alexis sits back in her chair.

  “Don’t listen to her,” Jordan says to me. “She’s just trying to make sense of all of this.”

  “So am I.” I stop. I look at Jordan. “I feel like I came back and screwed everything up. Can I ask you something?”

  “Always.”

  “Were you happier?” I say. “I mean, before you found me again?”

  “Are you crazy?” Jordan asks. He’s not just looking at his script, but glancing back and forth, up and down. Me and the page. “I couldn’t breathe when you were gone. It was like my life stopped for those six weeks. I didn’t even feel like I was alive.”

  Rainer shifts in his seat next to Jordan.

  “What did Maggie mean, then?” I ask. I play with the edge of my script. I can feel my face is hot.

  “We all love you,” Jordan says. “It’s hard to go through losing someone you love. She thought she’d never get you back. You just need to give her time, that’s all. We all just need time.”

  We keep reading. We’re almost through when Meredith pokes her head in.

  “Sorry to interrupt you guys, but I need Alfonso.”

  “All right, we just about made it,” he says.

  I feel disoriented, like I’m coming out of a dream. I blink and see Jordan is looking at me.

  “Never met a cast with more chemistry,” Alfonso tells us. “The next time I’ll see you all will be in Hawaii.”

  “Alfonso is flying out tomorrow,” Meredith says, snatching up her Starbucks cup. “I believe you’re all arriving the week after next?”

  “Yeah, except for this one,” Jordan says, gesturing to Alexis.

  “I have to stay for the Do Something event I’m chairing,” Alexis says proudly. “You guys are Skyping in, by the way.” She turns to me. “And I’m dropping off a T-shirt later today. I want you to Insta yourself in it.”

  “She doesn’t have Instagram,” Rainer says.

  “Yes, she does,” Alexis shoots back.

  Rainer looks at me. I shrug. “She set it up,” I say. “I don’t really know how it works.”

  “Okay,” Alfonso says, clearly having had enough of our social media banter. “I’ll see you all soon. Get ready to work.”

  Rainer shakes Alfonso’s hand. “We’re really looking forward to it.”

  “Seconded,” Alexis says. She stands as well.

  Alfonso follows Meredith toward the door. “We’re sending a car for you guys,” she says. “But feel free to stay or order lunch. Ella can help with whatever.” She gestures outside, to where her assistant is. “We’re excited!”

  The door snaps shut behind her, and then silence fills the space.

  “I wonder what we could steal here,” Alexis fills in.

  Rainer laughs. “No cash. But the good booze is hidden in the next conference room.” He gestures with his thumb.

  I think about how many times Rainer has been in these offices. I wonder where his father is, if Rainer has seen him in the last month. There is so much I don’t know about his life anymore.

  “I should head back,” Jordan says, standing. “I’ll see you guys on Maui.”

  Alexis makes a move for the door. “Can I hitch a ride? Brit dropped me off and took the car.” Alexis glances at me. “Sorry,” she says. “We, we’re just…”

  I wave my hand through the air. “I’ll call you later,” I say.

  Jordan holds the door open for Alexis, and then they disappear into the hallway, leaving me alone with Rainer.

  “Do you want to have lunch?” he asks me.

  My stomach is rumbling. I didn’t have breakfast this morning, or dinner last night, which puts my last meal at a piece of leftover cake at my parents’ house. But all of that takes a backseat to the fact that Rainer is asking to spend time with me, something he hasn’t done since before the Movie Awards. “Yeah,” I say. “I’m starving.”

  “Cool.”

  Rainer follows me out of the conference room, down the elevator, and to the parking lot. He holds the door to his familiar Range Rover open for me.

  “Where do you feel like going?” he asks as he starts driving.

  I shrug. “Somewhere we won’t be recognized.”

  “You got it.”

  We do drive-through In-N-Out Burger. Rainer gets a protein-style cheeseburger and I do the same. We agree on fries. “We’ll share them,” I say when Rainer points out we have to be half-naked in front of the cameras in a few short weeks.

  We eat in the parking lot. I inhale mine in three minutes flat. The burger is delicious. It seems crazy that after all this time in L.A. I’ve never had one.

  “Thanks for feeding me,” I say.

  “No problem.” He looks over at me. “Home, then?”

  I nod. I want to say something else to him. To tell him… what, exactly? That it feels nice being here with him? That I’m sorry? That I hope he can, at some point, get to a point where he can trust me again?

  What I end up saying is: “Can we go back to Bel Air and just hang out for a little while?”

  “Yeah,” he says. “I’d like that.”

  CHAPTER 16

  We turn off Sunset and weave our way up to the house. There are no photographers anywhere in sight as we pull through the gate and down to the garage. Rainer comes around, opens my door, and helps me out.

  The house looks the same, and I feel a rush of affection wash over me as I think about how we lived together here. I wonder if he’s changed things since I moved out, if the living room is reconfigured. Once I open the door, though, I see that it’s all the same. Nothing has changed. That is, besides the fact that Britney Drake, Rainer’s ex, is seated on his couch.

  “What are you doing here?” I say automatically. My eyes jump from Britney, perched on the sofa, to Rainer, standing behind me, but he looks just as clueless as I feel.

  “I thought we could spend some quality time together today, Rain.” She dangles a key from her pointer finger. “The gate was open, and you still keep it under the mat. I guess some things don’t change.”

  Rainer closes the door and stands firmly, arms crossed. “Now is not a good time.”

  “According to Alexis, and the u
niverse,” Britney says with a roll of her eyes, “you two broke up. My mistake.”

  “What do you want?” I ask her.

  Britney laughs. A childish, girlie laugh that makes my insides feel like rotting fruit. “Your boyfriend is my friend,” she says. “He didn’t tell you we’ve been spending time together?”

  I glance at Rainer, who is shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. “Not like that,” he says.

  “Oh, no,” Britney says, in mock sincerity. “We’re just friends. You know, kind of like you and Jordan?”

  “Enough,” Rainer says. “Britney, you need to leave. Now.”

  “Just a little while longer,” Britney says, tossing her feet up. “It’s so rare I get to have a heart-to-heart with Paige.”

  I snort. Rainer takes a stride toward the couch. “Britney, come on. Not now.”

  “No, I think now,” Britney says. “Rainer, I’m sorry, but your girl deserves to know the truth.”

  “Truth about what?”

  “Britney,” Rainer says through gritted teeth. “I’m going to ask you one last time to leave.”

  Britney walks silently over to Rainer. She touches his jaw with her hand, and my eyes widen as his narrow at her. “Paige,” Britney says, her hand still on Rainer. “Why don’t you decide? Do you want to know the real story about you and Rainer? Or should I leave?”

  “What are you talking about?” I say. My voice is shaking. Something about the way Rainer is looking at her, wild-eyed, makes my feet feel like they’ve grown roots. I can’t move.

  Britney turns her attention from him to me. She reminds me of a mountain lion, the way she moves. Like at any moment, she could pounce. “It was cute, wasn’t it?” she says. “The way you and Rain got together? He fell in love with you in Hawaii. The brightest rising star in Hollywood besotted with some average teenage girl.”

  “Stop!” Rainer yells.

  “What’s your point?” I say.

  Her eyes flash. “You never wondered?”

  “Wondered what?”

  “Let me spell it out for you, sweetheart.” She’s almost to me. I can smell her perfume. Tangy sweet. “Rainer didn’t fall in love with you. His dear old daddy told him to date you, and he simply followed orders.”